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Neurodiversity and high sex drives…
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Well, I would not be surprised if there is a link between my dopamine chasing adhd brain and my high sex drive, considering sex is a pretty good source of the stuff!
I wouldn't have a clue about other neuro divergent peeps |
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By *ole.24601 OP Man 26 weeks ago
Sutton Coldfield |
"Well, I would not be surprised if there is a link between my dopamine chasing adhd brain and my high sex drive, considering sex is a pretty good source of the stuff!
I wouldn't have a clue about other neuro divergent peeps "
I think it’s hard being wired in such a way and then “typical” people are shocked at the height of it.
Makes you feel a bit more out of place lol |
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By *ole.24601 OP Man 26 weeks ago
Sutton Coldfield |
"Yep, I should think so, of course people can present neurodivergence in different ways and hyperfocusing is a trait so if if the hyperfocus is sexual in nature then sure "
It can be a nightmare if it gets out of hand (or too much in hand I suppose) |
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"Does anybody have any thoughts on this?
Is there a correlation between being neurotic and erotic?
Please be respectful in the comments
"
I think the being neurodivergent does have an effect on people sexual development and expression and the effect is not always erotic. Especially what arouses and excites one person might not do that for the other person and often we can miss that; whether are neurotypical or neurodivergent.
Currently, I'm exhausted by my neurodivergent brain so it kills my libido, so I actually have to work quite hard to keep myself engaged with my sexuality. Otherwise, I find myself disengaged from people and reality...not a state of mind I view as psychologically stable or healthy for me. |
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"Well, I would not be surprised if there is a link between my dopamine chasing adhd brain and my high sex drive, considering sex is a pretty good source of the stuff!
I wouldn't have a clue about other neuro divergent peeps "
Well although happy hormones during and after sex usually feel really good to me with BPD/EUPD ( I feel emotions more intensely than other people) and Newly D autism ( I feel sensations/senses more intensely than other people)
And yet half the women my age have never had an orgasm although they have children and are married and are not virgins. This doesn't make any sense to me since I read about vibrators in Cosmopolitan magazine in the 90s and watched Sex and the City and the Rampant Rabbit episode.
My first orgasm was with a man. My multiple orgasms were with a man and a toy and my first squirt with a toy.
Then I meet married people in their 30s who have never used a toy and I've met many men intimidated and frustrated with toys.
it's so nuanced and there need to be a lot of communication, safety, experience and willingness to be open and learn and make sure you and other people are comfortable...and do those check-ins regularly.....and that I know is exhausting already for a ND person. |
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"Well, I would not be surprised if there is a link between my dopamine chasing adhd brain and my high sex drive, considering sex is a pretty good source of the stuff!
I wouldn't have a clue about other neuro divergent peeps
I think it’s hard being wired in such a way and then “typical” people are shocked at the height of it.
Makes you feel a bit more out of place lol "
NT people or vanilla people. 
I intend to continue to be shocking right into my senior citizen days. Life is too short for me to be worried about shocked people. Now if I hurt them or make them seriously uncomfortable which damages their personal integrity and overstep their boundaries, I will make amends but if not..we just agree to disagree on how I should live MY life.
They can judge away until they are in the grave....
My managers were upset with me and started to say inappropriate things and threatened to fire me. I said ok send me the paperwork and went back to doing the actual job I'm paid to do. I'm not paid to have arguments with management.
I swear I'm turning into a Miserable Middle-aged Millenial. Lol!  |
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"Yep, I should think so, of course people can present neurodivergence in different ways and hyperfocusing is a trait so if if the hyperfocus is sexual in nature then sure
It can be a nightmare if it gets out of hand (or too much in hand I suppose) "
What works for me is balance.
First, I regulate my emotions ( I can't think straight when my inner BPD toddler is on a rampage or my inner autistic toddler is in sensory shutdown, meltdown or burnout)
Secondly once my emotions are stable again, then I work through things objectively to aim for balance.
I mean wanking for 4 hours a day might not be healthy but wanking for one hour a day is unlikely to be harmful.
Watching porn for 4 hours might not be healthy but watching porn for 30 minutes in bed alone a day is probably fine. Watching porn for 30 minutes while ignoring your life partner who is sat right next to you....is probably a bad idea.
If you are watching porn for 4 hours a day and wanking for 4 hours a day, I'd question where is that need coming from and what can I substitute that need with instead that is more healthy/less damaging.
This is not common sense and I had to be taught this in therapy.
My parents just taught me to deny all my needs/emotions/senses/desires/achievements/celebrations and mask all the time and people-please---this is not balanced, stable, grounded, healthy or sustainable for anyone...ND or NT. |
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I think so. It has been raised that I probably have undiagnosed ADHD. I do have a high sex drive. And I found when I was single again and started "dating" I got over focused on a guy i was seeing. And tbh that didn't sit well with either of us. I slowly worked out that a healthy dose of ethical non monogamy was the answer to that problem. As I am not overly focus one 1 relationship but enjoying a few casual ones instead. |
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