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Why Is Nothing Ever Simple?
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Around 6 weeks ago… I explained to my husband that I’d like to redecorate our front room. Our house is a bit dated since we moved back up North, and I’d like a fresh and clean space where I’m not embarrassed to host.
I just wanted to tidy, paint, and put up new wallpaper. He agreed and we started just before the May bank holiday.
Here we are over a month later, and so far we’ve:-
1. hardwired data cable into the walls and floorboards to give wired internet everywhere.
2. shimmed, boarded, and plastered a twisted wall to make it true
3. put a new doorway in a solid 9” brick wall
4. put up picture rail
5. moved all the sockets
6. built a new fire surround
7. replaced the radiators (in every room)
8. replaced various skirting boards
The only thing not done, is the painting and wallpapering. And we’ve spent a fortune.
I love that my husband is practical, but all I wanted was a fresh space I would feel comfortable hosting daytime socials and sucking a dick or two.
Everything turns into a project… usually with Gantt charts.
Are all guys like this? Or is he mental?
*note* this is brought to you whilst eating my usual crunchy nut cornflakes lightly sprinkled with brick dust xx |
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"Haha I’m not sure about all blokes but I’d do exactly the same as your husband "
It’s always ‘well if we’re going to do X, then we might as well do Y… and therefore we might as well do Z’
He’s a nightmare xx |
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"Not all guys...if its simple and takes no more then 2 days I'll give it a go...anything else that's what tradesmen are for."
I would agree with you totally. Sadly he used to own a building firm and refuses to pay anyone to do stuff he can do himself… even if it means his knees and back are gone for a week afterwards  |
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I'm crap at DIY
That said... I don't know when to stop
A new kitchen has turned into a whole refurb of the downstairs and the first set of stairs
It put another 10k on the budget but it's worth it 
So, be thankful that your husband has probably saved you a fortune! |
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"I'm crap at DIY
That said... I don't know when to stop
A new kitchen has turned into a whole refurb of the downstairs and the first set of stairs
It put another 10k on the budget but it's worth it
So, be thankful that your husband has probably saved you a fortune! "
This happened when we lived down south. We had a 16th century cottage and he found out very quickly that modern stuff he can do… oak beams and leaded windows and twisted walls were out of his depth and we had to get in specialists  |
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"Wasn't expecting project porn!
Have you calendared an on-site f2f to thrash out some of the intertwined deliverables?
Has he got a Slack channel? "
Honestly if i hear the term ‘key deliverables’ again in our marriage it’ll be curtains |
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Aaaahhh OP we feel your pain! We're fixing up our house and every (small) job begets 1000 more jobs 
And dust everywhere!
We ended up getting impatient for hosting so we just warn people upfront what the state of the house is - there's a bed. Good enough  |
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"Aaaahhh OP we feel your pain! We're fixing up our house and every (small) job begets 1000 more jobs
And dust everywhere!
We ended up getting impatient for hosting so we just warn people upfront what the state of the house is - there's a bed. Good enough "
Haha love that xx |
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"Around 6 weeks ago… I explained to my husband that I’d like to redecorate our front room. Our house is a bit dated since we moved back up North, and I’d like a fresh and clean space where I’m not embarrassed to host.
I just wanted to tidy, paint, and put up new wallpaper. He agreed and we started just before the May bank holiday.
Here we are over a month later, and so far we’ve:-
1. hardwired data cable into the walls and floorboards to give wired internet everywhere.
2. shimmed, boarded, and plastered a twisted wall to make it true
3. put a new doorway in a solid 9” brick wall
4. put up picture rail
5. moved all the sockets
6. built a new fire surround
7. replaced the radiators (in every room)
8. replaced various skirting boards
The only thing not done, is the painting and wallpapering. And we’ve spent a fortune.
I love that my husband is practical, but all I wanted was a fresh space I would feel comfortable hosting daytime socials and sucking a dick or two.
Everything turns into a project… usually with Gantt charts.
Are all guys like this? Or is he mental?
*note* this is brought to you whilst eating my usual crunchy nut cornflakes lightly sprinkled with brick dust xx"
What a factual and funny description.
I think he had the ethos of getting everything done once - the you only need to re-decorate in future.
Not long before you'll have your room ready |
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By *929Man 30 weeks ago
newcastle |
"Haha I’m not sure about all blokes but I’d do exactly the same as your husband
It’s always ‘well if we’re going to do X, then we might as well do Y… and therefore we might as well do Z’
He’s a nightmare xx"
Haha I totally understand I think some of us are wired like that for example when my back fence blew down replacing it turned into building aa elaborate 8ft pillared wall with large brick planter and built in brick bbq/kitchen area I’d imagine your husband would do the same |
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"Yea a small job usually leads to numerous big jobs. That's life
Yes but the only thing not getting ‘done’ is me  "
Wiggle your bum at him while he is doing the decorating and that should work...not while he is doing the electrics though as that wouldnt be the explosion and fireworks you're looking for  |
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Its not always like that. But if you have multiple jobs to do, you may as well do them all at once.
I want to install an extract fan in my bathroom, which will expand to new down lighters (as the power will be off and.i'm cutting into the plasterboard ceiling). Repointing the external brickwork, (as i'll have a temp scaffold for the core cutting through the brickwork for the vent). A few cracks have appeared in the ceiling so that will need addressing amd then repaimt the ceiling. May as well redecorate all of it as the brushes are out. New flooring.. new silicone.. and then that and then this and thena towel rail...
It escalates quickly ! |
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"Around 6 weeks ago… I explained to my husband that I’d like to redecorate our front room. Our house is a bit dated since we moved back up North, and I’d like a fresh and clean space where I’m not embarrassed to host.
I just wanted to tidy, paint, and put up new wallpaper. He agreed and we started just before the May bank holiday.
Here we are over a month later, and so far we’ve:-
1. hardwired data cable into the walls and floorboards to give wired internet everywhere.
2. shimmed, boarded, and plastered a twisted wall to make it true
3. put a new doorway in a solid 9” brick wall
4. put up picture rail
5. moved all the sockets
6. built a new fire surround
7. replaced the radiators (in every room)
8. replaced various skirting boards
The only thing not done, is the painting and wallpapering. And we’ve spent a fortune.
I love that my husband is practical, but all I wanted was a fresh space I would feel comfortable hosting daytime socials and sucking a dick or two.
Everything turns into a project… usually with Gantt charts.
Are all guys like this? Or is he mental?
*note* this is brought to you whilst eating my usual crunchy nut cornflakes lightly sprinkled with brick dust xx"
Geezer  |
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"Haha I’m not sure about all blokes but I’d do exactly the same as your husband
It’s always ‘well if we’re going to do X, then we might as well do Y… and therefore we might as well do Z’
He’s a nightmare xx
Haha I totally understand I think some of us are wired like that for example when my back fence blew down replacing it turned into building aa elaborate 8ft pillared wall with large brick planter and built in brick bbq/kitchen area I’d imagine your husband would do the same "
Yes we did that once. Turfing the lawn became brick planters and a huge barbecue built on a plinth with paving slab worktops either side. We used it once |
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I'm pretty crap at DIY. Rest of my family are brilliant, which is why within a year of buying my (perfectly livable) house, I had a new extension with downstairs toilet and shower and an almost complete garden refurbishment. Whole house was repainted, new sockets in bedrooms, new boiler fitted.
All that was left to do was get a skip, clear last of the rubble, level strip of garden and put down fake grass.
3 years later, we still haven't done that bit. |
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"I'm pretty crap at DIY. Rest of my family are brilliant, which is why within a year of buying my (perfectly livable) house, I had a new extension with downstairs toilet and shower and an almost complete garden refurbishment. Whole house was repainted, new sockets in bedrooms, new boiler fitted.
All that was left to do was get a skip, clear last of the rubble, level strip of garden and put down fake grass.
3 years later, we still haven't done that bit."
That sounds familiar! I’m panicking that this will never get done |
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"Its not always like that. But if you have multiple jobs to do, you may as well do them all at once.
I want to install an extract fan in my bathroom, which will expand to new down lighters (as the power will be off and.i'm cutting into the plasterboard ceiling). Repointing the external brickwork, (as i'll have a temp scaffold for the core cutting through the brickwork for the vent). A few cracks have appeared in the ceiling so that will need addressing amd then repaimt the ceiling. May as well redecorate all of it as the brushes are out. New flooring.. new silicone.. and then that and then this and thena towel rail...
It escalates quickly !"
Sounds just like him x |
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No not in our house lol, doughnut isn't exactly "gifted" in the desire or need to decorate, I've done all the decorating (all bar the high stuff and one wall) and this is why aside from the bathroom and kitchen, none of the rooms are finished because I give up after a while, I've door frame with bits of old paint on them with bare wood showing, ceilings peeling, the list continues.
I said this year I wanted to get the hall finished (I mean I started it and by now it just needs redoing from the start again) and I want a nice looking bedroom, just two rooms and I know if I don't make a plan it still won't get done, decorating just doesn't interest him really, he's amazing with helping around the house and will do anything for anyone but decorating bores the life out of him lol |
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By *oozleMan 30 weeks ago
high wycombe |
To do any job well, you start at the foundation and work towards the end goal… so in your husbands case, he was stripping back and making decisions about what was needed, I.e data cables etc… that’s forward thinking, the wallpaper and paint are the finishing touches. |
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Sounds like he gets a buzz from doing a thorough job, rather than enjoying the end result (which is what you do).
I don’t know if you’ve heard of love language? It’s where one partner gets off being told they’re sexy but the other one gives them flowers. One isn’t right or wrong, but you need to tell each other what’s important to you.
If he loves getting stuck into the thoroughness of a job, let him do it building the world’s best shed or something. It’s not appropriate or fair for him to do his thing when it messes up what’s important to you, so you both need to get what you want. |
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"No not in our house lol, doughnut isn't exactly "gifted" in the desire or need to decorate, I've done all the decorating (all bar the high stuff and one wall) and this is why aside from the bathroom and kitchen, none of the rooms are finished because I give up after a while, I've door frame with bits of old paint on them with bare wood showing, ceilings peeling, the list continues.
I said this year I wanted to get the hall finished (I mean I started it and by now it just needs redoing from the start again) and I want a nice looking bedroom, just two rooms and I know if I don't make a plan it still won't get done, decorating just doesn't interest him really, he's amazing with helping around the house and will do anything for anyone but decorating bores the life out of him lol"
This made me smile x |
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"To do any job well, you start at the foundation and work towards the end goal… so in your husbands case, he was stripping back and making decisions about what was needed, I.e data cables etc… that’s forward thinking, the wallpaper and paint are the finishing touches."
I get it… his thinking is ‘get anything done that will ruin the finishes if we have to do it later’
Just bloody annoying. And still nowhere to get dicked |
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"Sounds like he gets a buzz from doing a thorough job, rather than enjoying the end result (which is what you do).
I don’t know if you’ve heard of love language? It’s where one partner gets off being told they’re sexy but the other one gives them flowers. One isn’t right or wrong, but you need to tell each other what’s important to you.
If he loves getting stuck into the thoroughness of a job, let him do it building the world’s best shed or something. It’s not appropriate or fair for him to do his thing when it messes up what’s important to you, so you both need to get what you want."
This is deep xx |
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By *oozleMan 30 weeks ago
high wycombe |
"To do any job well, you start at the foundation and work towards the end goal… so in your husbands case, he was stripping back and making decisions about what was needed, I.e data cables etc… that’s forward thinking, the wallpaper and paint are the finishing touches.
I get it… his thinking is ‘get anything done that will ruin the finishes if we have to do it later’
Just bloody annoying. And still nowhere to get dicked "
To do anything well… takes patience and time, I understand the frustration, but ultimately, he is doing the best for the both of you to do a though job that will last for many years of fun times! |
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"OP, I'm hoping you used Cat6e solid core UTP ethernet cabling."
I’m not even being ironic here… but he was late starting because our local Screwfix and B&Q only had Cat5, and Edmundsons was shut, so he waited until the Cat6e came from online.
And he made me do all the RJ45 plugs because his fingers are too big  |
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"OP, I'm hoping you used Cat6e solid core UTP ethernet cabling.
What's wrong with Cat5?  don't tell me I need to rip out and start again "
He’s just taunting you, the little tyke! There’s no such thing as 6e, only 6 and 6a.
You’ll be fine with 5e at home. |
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Unfortunately the paint and paper is just the tip of the iceberg. I'm a plasterer and the work involved with just one wall can often be monumental. Your fella is trying to "future proof" your space, ie he doesn't ever want to go back to touch up the Paint or restick a seam of paper because he wants it all done and dusted. Most dudes are like this. |
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"OP, I'm hoping you used Cat6e solid core UTP ethernet cabling.
What's wrong with Cat5? don't tell me I need to rip out and start again
He’s just taunting you, the little tyke! There’s no such thing as 6e, only 6 and 6a.
You’ll be fine with 5e at home."
You ca n get 6e, I jus t wo nder ed if it w oul d hav e eli mi nate d my buffff ering |
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"Unfortunately the paint and paper is just the tip of the iceberg. I'm a plasterer and the work involved with just one wall can often be monumental. Your fella is trying to "future proof" your space, ie he doesn't ever want to go back to touch up the Paint or restick a seam of paper because he wants it all done and dusted. Most dudes are like this. "
Yeah he basically said he wanted it so that if I ever wanted to change it again… it would just be paper and paint only |
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"Around 6 weeks ago… I explained to my husband that I’d like to redecorate our front room. Our house is a bit dated since we moved back up North, and I’d like a fresh and clean space where I’m not embarrassed to host.
I just wanted to tidy, paint, and put up new wallpaper. He agreed and we started just before the May bank holiday.
Here we are over a month later, and so far we’ve:-
1. hardwired data cable into the walls and floorboards to give wired internet everywhere.
2. shimmed, boarded, and plastered a twisted wall to make it true
3. put a new doorway in a solid 9” brick wall
4. put up picture rail
5. moved all the sockets
6. built a new fire surround
7. replaced the radiators (in every room)
8. replaced various skirting boards
The only thing not done, is the painting and wallpapering. And we’ve spent a fortune.
I love that my husband is practical, but all I wanted was a fresh space I would feel comfortable hosting daytime socials and sucking a dick or two.
Everything turns into a project… usually with Gantt charts.
Are all guys like this? Or is he mental?
*note* this is brought to you whilst eating my usual crunchy nut cornflakes lightly sprinkled with brick dust xx"
How much money did you use? |
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By *oozleMan 30 weeks ago
high wycombe |
"How much does he charge per hr as I have a drippy tap and a squeaky floorboard in the bathroom that I'm guaranteed to explode my house if I even approach a screwdriver. "
Drippy tap is normally a washer |
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By *hirleyMan 30 weeks ago
somewhere |
"Not all guys...if its simple and takes no more then 2 days I'll give it a go...anything else that's what tradesmen are for.
I would agree with you totally. Sadly he used to own a building firm and refuses to pay anyone to do stuff he can do himself… even if it means his knees and back are gone for a week afterwards "
If I can do something myself (I am a trained tradesman also) I will rarely consider contracting someone for it. Paying for it has little to do with why I want to do it myself though, that is almost always because I feel I will do a better job than others, I know many will try to cut corners and that annoys me more than anything |
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"Cat6 solid core UTP is overkill for a house surely?
•
You're chiseling into masonry so you may as well future-proof now. It's not an overkill.
You'll be in a retirement home before you need 6e "
•
The retirement home will need Cat7 FTP. |
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"How much does he charge per hr as I have a drippy tap and a squeaky floorboard in the bathroom that I'm guaranteed to explode my house if I even approach a screwdriver.
Drippy tap is normally a washer"
I have a lot of experience in finding several useless tools and not knowing how to use them (you heard that right) |
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omg !! is cable not cable!!!
if i cant use no nails then it aint getting fixed!!
i tried trade's people - in my garden - they dug a big hole - put lots of stones in it - moved the shed which now has a lean and looks like the Pizza tower! they broke the patio that was already down - and put some fence rails that would stop a rhinoceros on full charge and cemented lumps everywhere - he made a gate that doesnt open because of the cement layer !!! then they left and said they would be back to fix the 'bits' ... that was 3 years ago and not seen them since!
so yea if any of you get bored and want to dig holes - you can play in my muddy paddling pool of a garden !!!
providing you dont sue me when a slab flips up and smacks you in the face !!!
|
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"Around 6 weeks ago… I explained to my husband that I’d like to redecorate our front room. Our house is a bit dated since we moved back up North, and I’d like a fresh and clean space where I’m not embarrassed to host.
I just wanted to tidy, paint, and put up new wallpaper. He agreed and we started just before the May bank holiday.
Here we are over a month later, and so far we’ve:-
1. hardwired data cable into the walls and floorboards to give wired internet everywhere.
2. shimmed, boarded, and plastered a twisted wall to make it true
3. put a new doorway in a solid 9” brick wall
4. put up picture rail
5. moved all the sockets
6. built a new fire surround
7. replaced the radiators (in every room)
8. replaced various skirting boards
The only thing not done, is the painting and wallpapering. And we’ve spent a fortune.
I love that my husband is practical, but all I wanted was a fresh space I would feel comfortable hosting daytime socials and sucking a dick or two.
Everything turns into a project… usually with Gantt charts.
Are all guys like this? Or is he mental?
*note* this is brought to you whilst eating my usual crunchy nut cornflakes lightly sprinkled with brick dust xx
How much money did you use?"
I think we’re up to about £1200. That’s not including the wallpaper that’s been sat in it’s carrier bag since day 1 |
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" omg !! is cable not cable!!!
if i cant use no nails then it aint getting fixed!!
i tried trade's people - in my garden - they dug a big hole - put lots of stones in it - moved the shed which now has a lean and looks like the Pizza tower! they broke the patio that was already down - and put some fence rails that would stop a rhinoceros on full charge and cemented lumps everywhere - he made a gate that doesnt open because of the cement layer !!! then they left and said they would be back to fix the 'bits' ... that was 3 years ago and not seen them since!
so yea if any of you get bored and want to dig holes - you can play in my muddy paddling pool of a garden !!!
providing you dont sue me when a slab flips up and smacks you in the face !!!
"
|
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"Not all guys...if its simple and takes no more then 2 days I'll give it a go...anything else that's what tradesmen are for.
I would agree with you totally. Sadly he used to own a building firm and refuses to pay anyone to do stuff he can do himself… even if it means his knees and back are gone for a week afterwards
If I can do something myself (I am a trained tradesman also) I will rarely consider contracting someone for it. Paying for it has little to do with why I want to do it myself though, that is almost always because I feel I will do a better job than others, I know many will try to cut corners and that annoys me more than anything "
My hubby is a trained QS. tradesmen steer clear of us  |
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"How much does he charge per hr as I have a drippy tap and a squeaky floorboard in the bathroom that I'm guaranteed to explode my house if I even approach a screwdriver. "
He’d probably do it for free. In the Easter hols he took a week off work… and disappeared to build his friend’s patio |
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"I haven't met a tube of no more nails that works yet.
haha except when you put something up that is a bit wonky and cant get the bloody thing back off "
To be fair… our original skirting boards were on with No Nails… and taking them off has resulted in several plaster patch repairs being needed.
I didn’t anticipate that we’d need a skip for re-papering a room |
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By (user no longer on site) 30 weeks ago
|
I'm like that. Honestly, the other jobs feel like they'll get done. Painting often feels like forever, ESPECIALLY if you have to move everything out of the way. To me, it's much harder.
If you start moving the big furniture out, he'll get round to it |
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By *929Man 30 weeks ago
newcastle |
"Haha I’m not sure about all blokes but I’d do exactly the same as your husband
It’s always ‘well if we’re going to do X, then we might as well do Y… and therefore we might as well do Z’
He’s a nightmare xx
Haha I totally understand I think some of us are wired like that for example when my back fence blew down replacing it turned into building aa elaborate 8ft pillared wall with large brick planter and built in brick bbq/kitchen area I’d imagine your husband would do the same
Yes we did that once. Turfing the lawn became brick planters and a huge barbecue built on a plinth with paving slab worktops either side. We used it once "
Haha your husband is a great man I like him already without ever meeting |
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By *glyBettyTV/TS 30 weeks ago
About 3 feet away from the fence |
He's done all that within a month?
Does he do freelance?
If he isn't getting paid for this, it sounds like he should be.
You'd be lucky to get that level of efficiency from a team of professionals... |
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"He's done all that within a month?
Does he do freelance?
If he isn't getting paid for this, it sounds like he should be.
You'd be lucky to get that level of efficiency from a team of professionals..."
Lol he used to get paid to organise a lot of people to do this kind of thing on a bigger scale. Looks like we’re never escaping it lol. |
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"No not in our house lol, doughnut isn't exactly "gifted" in the desire or need to decorate, I've done all the decorating (all bar the high stuff and one wall) and this is why aside from the bathroom and kitchen, none of the rooms are finished because I give up after a while, I've door frame with bits of old paint on them with bare wood showing, ceilings peeling, the list continues.
I said this year I wanted to get the hall finished (I mean I started it and by now it just needs redoing from the start again) and I want a nice looking bedroom, just two rooms and I know if I don't make a plan it still won't get done, decorating just doesn't interest him really, he's amazing with helping around the house and will do anything for anyone but decorating bores the life out of him lol"
This is because:
1 it takes too long
And
2 when it's done I don't get the WOW! It's so different (because I've seen the changes as they happen  ) can't we get Nick Knowles in? |
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