FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do people actually reply to messages
Do people actually reply to messages
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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As assume you're speaking on women/couples.
The answer is generally; only if they like you and want to potentially meet. Otherwise they just ignore as it's easier.
I know it's hard to get as a man and it seems rude, but many women/couples on here can literally get over a hundred messages a day.. |
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"Just curious if people actually reply back to messages here "
I'm just curious too ! Nice avatar. Reminds me of a rude child or someone with a facial muscular problem. So cute.
I reply to all messages except ones that appear to come from vulgar assumptive chancers. |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"I reply but i understand why some women dont reply..
They are bombarded by guys and is very easy to be extremely picky i suppose..
However does make life much harder for guys here... "
Extremely picky = just wanting to meet guys I'm actually attracted to. |
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"I reply but i understand why some women dont reply..
They are bombarded by guys and is very easy to be extremely picky i suppose..
However does make life much harder for guys here...
Extremely picky = just wanting to meet guys I'm actually attracted to. "
Well thats just one way of putting it.. i d say guys many times will meet just whoever as it s much harder. Not saying that i will do that ..but many will |
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"I reply but i understand why some women dont reply..
They are bombarded by guys and is very easy to be extremely picky i suppose..
However does make life much harder for guys here... "
Why shouldn't anyone, not just women, have a choice over who they want to meet? I'm not 'extremely picky'. I simply won't meet people I'm not interested in. And if anyone gives me the impression they've carpet bombed every woman within a 300 mile radius then why would I be interested in meeting someone who is just playing a numbers game in the hope anyone at all will reply? |
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It depends on what you've said. If its a nice thought out message and we know you've read our profile, then yes, we will reply. But, if it's a 1 or 2 word message then no. Or, if don't have photos on your profile it will be a no. |
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"I reply but i understand why some women dont reply..
They are bombarded by guys and is very easy to be extremely picky i suppose..
However does make life much harder for guys here...
Why shouldn't anyone, not just women, have a choice over who they want to meet? I'm not 'extremely picky'. I simply won't meet people I'm not interested in. And if anyone gives me the impression they've carpet bombed every woman within a 300 mile radius then why would I be interested in meeting someone who is just playing a numbers game in the hope anyone at all will reply?"
Ofcourse all have a choice...but lets be realistic...if nobody speaks to you..then you become a bit desperate |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"I reply but i understand why some women dont reply..
They are bombarded by guys and is very easy to be extremely picky i suppose..
However does make life much harder for guys here...
Why shouldn't anyone, not just women, have a choice over who they want to meet? I'm not 'extremely picky'. I simply won't meet people I'm not interested in. And if anyone gives me the impression they've carpet bombed every woman within a 300 mile radius then why would I be interested in meeting someone who is just playing a numbers game in the hope anyone at all will reply?
Ofcourse all have a choice...but lets be realistic...if nobody speaks to you..then you become a bit desperate"
Lovely |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"Stop bombarding me everyone please. Your messages are important to me and I will get back to you as soon as possible.
In 5-10 business days"
Reminds me, I need to switch my out of office off. |
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"I reply but i understand why some women dont reply..
They are bombarded by guys and is very easy to be extremely picky i suppose..
However does make life much harder for guys here...
Why shouldn't anyone, not just women, have a choice over who they want to meet? I'm not 'extremely picky'. I simply won't meet people I'm not interested in. And if anyone gives me the impression they've carpet bombed every woman within a 300 mile radius then why would I be interested in meeting someone who is just playing a numbers game in the hope anyone at all will reply?
Ofcourse all have a choice...but lets be realistic...if nobody speaks to you..then you become a bit desperate
Lovely"
Indeed lovely |
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"Stop bombarding me everyone please. Your messages are important to me and I will get back to you as soon as possible.
In 5-10 business days"
I was thinking more along the lines of 'before hell freezes over' |
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I reply to every message I get.
I don't get many but it's still easy to be very picky.
I haven't sent an opening message in 4 years so I don't have to worry about whether others will reply or not.
When I did send messages I deleted them as soon as I sent them so I wouldn't be checking constantly to see if they had been read or not. |
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"Ofcourse all have a choice...but lets be realistic...if nobody speaks to you..then you become a bit desperate
Well desperation is super attractive and the women will flock to you then "
Ok ok ... whats wrong with everybody?
I didnt say i was desperate..we are just discussing the situation on fab |
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"Ofcourse all have a choice...but lets be realistic...if nobody speaks to you..then you become a bit desperate
Well desperation is super attractive and the women will flock to you then
Ok ok ... whats wrong with everybody?
I didnt say i was desperate..we are just discussing the situation on fab"
I didn't say you were desperate.
But if the reaction to no replies is to become desperate, why would that increase the likelihood of response? |
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"Ofcourse all have a choice...but lets be realistic...if nobody speaks to you..then you become a bit desperate
Well desperation is super attractive and the women will flock to you then
Ok ok ... whats wrong with everybody?
I didnt say i was desperate..we are just discussing the situation on fab
I didn't say you were desperate.
But if the reaction to no replies is to become desperate, why would that increase the likelihood of response?"
Probably will not..you are correct. But i was just mentioning why it start to become desperate... many men dont have chance to meet women very easily |
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"Probably will not..you are correct. But i was just mentioning why it start to become desperate... many men dont have chance to meet women very easily"
Easily.
As if it's easy to find someone actually attractive and compatible as a woman here. |
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I do if they spark my interest, usually I don't though, I more often reply to people when I go for my usual old lady trip to the bathroom at 3am, when someone asks me if I'm horny...yeah sure, pop round lol. |
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"Just curious if people actually reply back to messages here "
We always reply to messages, but totally understand that people have the right to NOT reply. If there's no response, we know they're not interested.
Cal |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"I do if they spark my interest, usually I don't though, I more often reply to people when I go for my usual old lady trip to the bathroom at 3am, when someone asks me if I'm horny...yeah sure, pop round lol."
Hang on, I haven't seen you in the bathroom at my 3.00am insomnia induced trip! |
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"I do if they spark my interest, usually I don't though, I more often reply to people when I go for my usual old lady trip to the bathroom at 3am, when someone asks me if I'm horny...yeah sure, pop round lol.
Hang on, I haven't seen you in the bathroom at my 3.00am insomnia induced trip!"
My bad, must do better lol |
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"Usually I respond.
I think if someone doesnt get crazy amount of messages ..then it s polite to answer with a polite no thank you..ans even then if needed well block the guy.."
Of course that depends on whether the initial message deserves a polite reply. Sometimes an instant block is far more appropriate. |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"Usually I respond.
I think if someone doesnt get crazy amount of messages ..then it s polite to answer with a polite no thank you..ans even then if needed well block the guy.."
As the Fab FAQs say "It's not rude not to reply" |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"I do if they spark my interest, usually I don't though, I more often reply to people when I go for my usual old lady trip to the bathroom at 3am, when someone asks me if I'm horny...yeah sure, pop round lol.
Hang on, I haven't seen you in the bathroom at my 3.00am insomnia induced trip!
My bad, must do better lol"
I also take exception to the"old lady"!! Honestly, the youth of today (mere spring chicken!) |
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By *elloWoman 31 weeks ago
alpha centauri |
"Just curious if people actually reply back to messages here "
I reply to some, but not even half of what I get , it's not possible to reply to that many. Especially when each 'thank you but no thanks ' generates a further 3 or 4 messages then nah sod that, I didn't ask the person to message me in the first place so why should I have to respond.
1 I got a couple of hours ago was literally 'X' why and how should I have responded to a single letter of the alphabet? |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"Just curious if people actually reply back to messages here
I reply to some, but not even half of what I get , it's not possible to reply to that many. Especially when each 'thank you but no thanks ' generates a further 3 or 4 messages then nah sod that, I didn't ask the person to message me in the first place so why should I have to respond.
1 I got a couple of hours ago was literally 'X' why and how should I have responded to a single letter of the alphabet? "
We get a few of them. I wonder if thay has ever worked for them. |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"Just curious if people actually reply back to messages here
I reply to some, but not even half of what I get , it's not possible to reply to that many. Especially when each 'thank you but no thanks ' generates a further 3 or 4 messages then nah sod that, I didn't ask the person to message me in the first place so why should I have to respond.
1 I got a couple of hours ago was literally 'X' why and how should I have responded to a single letter of the alphabet? "
With just a 'Y' |
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By *oozleMan 31 weeks ago
high wycombe |
It depends on the person who gets the message, even if you write what you believe is the kindest message and nicest, sometimes you won’t get a reply.
This could be because of many reasons, I’m sure a lot of women and couples get loads of messages so purely the numbers could get in the way, the profile you have also plays a big part! |
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We look at a profile before opening a message - we know from that whether it’s wise or worth opening the message.
When you send a message you are effectively saying ‘come and look at me’ - so it would be wise to have a good profile as well as a good first message.
K |
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By *ezoMan 31 weeks ago
The Kingdom |
"Just curious if people actually reply back to messages here "
I do, while I understand that not everyone will and that is their choice. Myself I have had about half replied to.
But like some have said, most people seem to not even read the profile of who they are messaging. It is a bit awkward to reply. |
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By *rangarCouple 31 weeks ago
Bromsgrove |
I reply to the ones that seem to have e shown an interest in us and our profile but so many are just one word or an obvious cut & paste.
I also get a bit fed up when people ask questions or for adevice which I’m fine with and I spend time posting a reply only to find I hear nothing again or the message isn’t even read. |
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No one is owed a reply. In the same way we weren’t owed a message in the first place
If someone has read our profile and made an effort we will always reply
If they haven’t we won’t.
The ratio of delete no reply yesterday versus reply was around 90% and we had a lot of messages (new video) |
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By *rangarCouple 31 weeks ago
Bromsgrove |
"No wonder folk just leave a short message .. nothing worse or more frustrating when u put the effort in on a long message and the recipient just deletes it .. mmmh "
I find it depends on the message…We read them all but some of the long ones are clearly cut & paste with no reference to reading our profile….others are short but have clearly read what we want. |
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"No wonder folk just leave a short message .. nothing worse or more frustrating when u put the effort in on a long message and the recipient just deletes it .. mmmh "
I will generally reply to a person, if the sender seems to have a genuine interest in me, even if they are not my type.
I will even reply to a hi or how are you. It when the first message or second is you free today or when you free etc. I just ignore.
Don't know the mindset of people like that. They seem to think everyone is desperate to jump into bed with anyone. No effort to see if you are compatible or anything. |
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"Just curious if people actually reply back to messages here
I'm just curious too ! Nice avatar. Reminds me of a rude child or someone with a facial muscular problem. So cute.
I reply to all messages except ones that appear to come from vulgar assumptive chancers. "
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"Send the right message to the right person and they will reply, copy and paste messages are easy to spot a mile away."
Its amazing how many guys message the same opening message again and again. I have one guy who messages the same message every month wanting to meet in car. Even though, after declining the offer on first message, I've ignored every message. |
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"Send the right message to the right person and they will reply, copy and paste messages are easy to spot a mile away.
Its amazing how many guys message the same opening message again and again. I have one guy who messages the same message every month wanting to meet in car. Even though, after declining the offer on first message, I've ignored every message. "
I don’t think the previous messages show when the sender does this. We always replay which should bring historic messages back into their inbox.
If it’s a load of cut and paste we then block |
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By *yzykMan 31 weeks ago
Stirlingshire |
"No wonder folk just leave a short message .. nothing worse or more frustrating when u put the effort in on a long message and the recipient just deletes it .. mmmh "
This
Never ever sent a short message or a cut n paste job, usually always deleted unopened |
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"Send the right message to the right person and they will reply, copy and paste messages are easy to spot a mile away.
Its amazing how many guys message the same opening message again and again. I have one guy who messages the same message every month wanting to meet in car. Even though, after declining the offer on first message, I've ignored every message.
I don’t think the previous messages show when the sender does this. We always replay which should bring historic messages back into their inbox.
If it’s a load of cut and paste we then block "
The previous messages will show unless they deleted the thread. But I think they just see your profile and hit message and paste. In which case they aren't aware of previous messages. |
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I usually get replies to be fair..
Replies are more likely if personalised,polite, funny and have a photo.
If I don't get a reply i presume I'm not their type or I got lost in the 200 other similar messages they received |
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The majority won't reply but they get hundreds of messages a day so while they may start by replying even to say no they soon loss the will to continue.
I'm always grateful when anyone messages/ replies even if to say no.
I do sometimes wish my inbox was full. |
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By *elloWoman 31 weeks ago
alpha centauri |
"I’ll reply if they say more than “Hi” or if the message appears that they have more than a single brain cell "
What !! I've got to have more than 1 brain cell .
But I've got boobies ( . ) ( . )
Men on here are such a tease with their unattainable preferences |
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"Men usually do. For me it has to be more than "hi" or "_ello"."
I don't mind replying to a hi or _ello as a opening message. After all we open a normal conversation like this.
It's when the conversation afterwards you discover they only know 3 sentences.
" How you"
"Am horny "
"You free" or "When you free" |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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Had my first reply yesterday. But due to no verification It was a hard no but to each their own . No grudges . I did thank them for replying and saying no sorry . To get a meet people want verification . To get verification you need to meet . It's catch 22 .... |
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"I try to reply to all messages as wouldn’t just ignore someone in real life -can be time consuming but always think you don’t know what people are going though so try to be polite! "
i totally agree with you here - takes time and sometimes i just dont have the time to do it - |
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"I try to reply to all messages as wouldn’t just ignore someone in real life -can be time consuming but always think you don’t know what people are going though so try to be polite!
i totally agree with you here - takes time and sometimes i just dont have the time to do it -"
Exactly - can only try to be a good human |
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"Just curious if people actually reply back to messages here "
I do yea, but then I'm only getting one or two a week. If I were getting 100's a day I probably wouldn't be bothering with every single one.
I would at least delete them though. Not just leave them on read. Something I brought up in a separate forum thread. |
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"I reply to anything that manages more than 3 words and appears to have read the profile.
Usually still with just a no thanks.
But still." thank you that is what I would personally do as if someone has taken their time to message I would feel ignorant even if it is to say no thank you. |
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When we first started fab we would reply to everyone, our mantra was you never know what people are going through & enjoyed being nice and kind to people.
But after you have been shit on a few times & 90% of the people who message you hit your published red flags it's time to start being more selective to whom you reply back to.
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"i try to reply to all but so many are a nuisance if you say no thanks" if I do get a response saying no thank you I respect that and don’t try and message again as for me it’s not only disrespectful but also implies you are desperate. Thank you for your comment
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We reply to ones with a degree of sincerity and politeness. When you get ones which consist of the words:
"Suk mi kok"
...then we tend not to bother. And yes, we've had that message a few times now. |
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"We do, mostly. Although it’s not the answer people usually want.
Hades
x
You didn’t reply to mine… meanie "
What? When? You’re always top of our reply list.. do I need to take someone out for a thrashing?
Hades
x |
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