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Impossible beauty standards
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By (user no longer on site) OP 23 weeks ago
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Do you think that we (society) generally still hold women to impossibly high beauty standards? All the talk you see about beauty standards being more diverse and accepting and following the story that Declan Rice‘s partner has been forced to delete her social media because of abuse she receives.
Are things really getting better? |
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I think so, when you look at some of the stunning women here, who still use filters or are snatching their waists in etc. There must be a level of trying to get to impossible standards to make them feel it is necessary. |
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It has always made me sick how women are made to feel inferior because of their looks. I can still remember being about 13, walking along with a friend and a group of lads were behind us. To this day their comments make me sad. "I'll have the one on the right, the one on the left I wouldn't leave for my dog". I was the one on the left. And that's how I feel about me now really. It hasn't got better with social media. |
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"It has always made me sick how women are made to feel inferior because of their looks. I can still remember being about 13, walking along with a friend and a group of lads were behind us. To this day their comments make me sad. "I'll have the one on the right, the one on the left I wouldn't leave for my dog". I was the one on the left. And that's how I feel about me now really. It hasn't got better with social media. "
I would imagine almost every 13 year old boy could also tell you a similar story about how they were humiliated by a group of girls for being too ugly, skinny, dorky, whatever. I certainly can remember things that were said so I feel your pain. |
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"It has always made me sick how women are made to feel inferior because of their looks. I can still remember being about 13, walking along with a friend and a group of lads were behind us. To this day their comments make me sad. "I'll have the one on the right, the one on the left I wouldn't leave for my dog". I was the one on the left. And that's how I feel about me now really. It hasn't got better with social media.
I would imagine almost every 13 year old boy could also tell you a similar story about how they were humiliated by a group of girls for being too ugly, skinny, dorky, whatever. I certainly can remember things that were said so I feel your pain."
Probably wouldn't be such an issue if it were an isolated incident. It was the start. And continues to this day. *shrugs* one day someone will see my worth beyond the exterior maybe. |
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"It has always made me sick how women are made to feel inferior because of their looks. I can still remember being about 13, walking along with a friend and a group of lads were behind us. To this day their comments make me sad. "I'll have the one on the right, the one on the left I wouldn't leave for my dog". I was the one on the left. And that's how I feel about me now really. It hasn't got better with social media. "
That’s very sad. It’s amazing how long the effects of hurtful comments last, and how little power a thousand nice ones have to counteract them. I remember many comments directed against me, and also a few directed against people I showed an interest in by my mates. I wish I had had the strength of character at the time to call them out. |
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I think it's perhaps more of an issue for younger women who are less sure of themselves and define themselves primarily in terms of how others judge them based on how they look.
I struggle a bit getting my head around why women who are of an age where they reached at least mid adulthood without the influence of social media aren't so able to see past it |
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there was a thing C4 about trolling and social media the other night. it was horrific to see that mainly women who are in the public eye, whether famous or influencers are targeted by these trolls. There was actually a chat group on one of the dark web things (sorry not very technically minded on this) where they compared who they were targeting and what things to say .
the victims were often so traumatised by the vile messages they received - there was a lovely young girl on there who has been hounded that she had put a bit of weight on that she wasnt eating and was crying telling the reporter how she was going to bed hungry so that she didnt look fat any more . its a serious issue. This 'say what you like' mentality is not acceptable and I dont know how it got that it is - I have actually had someone say to my face that they can say what they like - well you cant there are consequences to your actions.
until there is a way to properly police and stop this - trolling and nasty comments from the key board warriors will be a huge problem. There are actually groups out there targeting young girls and trying to get them to self harm or even worse kill themselves.
sorry for long post but i have dealt with the aftermath a few times of trolling on young girls and its beyond disgusting and there needs to be more done about it to protect the individuals that are targeted.
not ruling out that males are also impacted by this - just my experience is young females
sorry not sorry for the long post |
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By (user no longer on site) 23 weeks ago
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No, it’s only getting worse in my opinion.
There’s so much pressure to look a certain way and for most it’s impossible to achieve. Growing up in a generation so heavily influenced by social media, it’s never ending. Even i struggle to keep up with the latest trends.
Declan Rice’s partner is an example of how toxic it can be. She’s beautiful, yet because she doesn’t fit into those beauty standards, she’s been forced into hiding. It’s vile. |
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By *eah BabyCouple 23 weeks ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
I’ve never let anybody hold me to any kind of standards, more the girl next door tree climbing kind of person, comb my hair in the morning and it’s messy the rest of the day, take me as I am or not at all, always been that way and always will, maybe a different story if I was a teenager/young person these days but I really doubt it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 23 weeks ago
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"It has always made me sick how women are made to feel inferior because of their looks. I can still remember being about 13, walking along with a friend and a group of lads were behind us. To this day their comments make me sad. "I'll have the one on the right, the one on the left I wouldn't leave for my dog". I was the one on the left. And that's how I feel about me now really. It hasn't got better with social media.
I would imagine almost every 13 year old boy could also tell you a similar story about how they were humiliated by a group of girls for being too ugly, skinny, dorky, whatever. I certainly can remember things that were said so I feel your pain.
Probably wouldn't be such an issue if it were an isolated incident. It was the start. And continues to this day. *shrugs* one day someone will see my worth beyond the exterior maybe. "
you are such a wonderful person. You have a lot to give  |
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By *lueLotusWoman 23 weeks ago
the wilderness |
There's an interesting documentary about this, how women are being photoshopped and commodified for public consumption, thus setting up inflated 'ideals'. It's called 'killing us softly'. I think you can find it on YouTube.
It's been updated a couple of times over the years and the newest update is how men are now receiving similar treatment.
I showed it to my teenagers and would recommend it. |
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"There's an interesting documentary about this, how women are being photoshopped and commodified for public consumption, thus setting up inflated 'ideals'. It's called 'killing us softly'. I think you can find it on YouTube.
It's been updated a couple of times over the years and the newest update is how men are now receiving similar treatment.
I showed it to my teenagers and would recommend it. "
Thank you will look it up |
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"It has always made me sick how women are made to feel inferior because of their looks. I can still remember being about 13, walking along with a friend and a group of lads were behind us. To this day their comments make me sad. "I'll have the one on the right, the one on the left I wouldn't leave for my dog". I was the one on the left. And that's how I feel about me now really. It hasn't got better with social media.
I would imagine almost every 13 year old boy could also tell you a similar story about how they were humiliated by a group of girls for being too ugly, skinny, dorky, whatever. I certainly can remember things that were said so I feel your pain.
Probably wouldn't be such an issue if it were an isolated incident. It was the start. And continues to this day. *shrugs* one day someone will see my worth beyond the exterior maybe. you are such a wonderful person. You have a lot to give "
Thank you. That means a lot 
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By *emidemiWoman 23 weeks ago
basingstoke |
I think there’s definitely a new spin off topic related to this one, about the rise of AI and using that to push those beauty standards even more.
Dove have actually done a pretty great advert about it:
https://youtu.be/13WZij3xmCA?si=Mp3-hEbbGoFrE85k |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 23 weeks ago
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"No, it’s only getting worse in my opinion.
There’s so much pressure to look a certain way and for most it’s impossible to achieve. Growing up in a generation so heavily influenced by social media, it’s never ending. Even i struggle to keep up with the latest trends.
Declan Rice’s partner is an example of how toxic it can be. She’s beautiful, yet because she doesn’t fit into those beauty standards, she’s been forced into hiding. It’s vile. "
I can’t believe what’s happened with her. They did it with Harry Kane as well. I think it’s horrid that she is being bullied literally just for not looking how people want a famous person’s partner to look. A huge factor is fame here for sure I think. So sad. Hopefully she can come back at some stage but to be chased off the internet, off your spaces to be social- grim. |
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"I think it's perhaps more of an issue for younger women who are less sure of themselves and define themselves primarily in terms of how others judge them based on how they look.
I struggle a bit getting my head around why women who are of an age where they reached at least mid adulthood without the influence of social media aren't so able to see past it"
Women have been held to impossible standards for a long time. The "teen" magazines were terrible for body image and the magazines that used to be in the hairdressers and dentist waiting rooms etc were even worse. You'd see headlines about how Female Celebrity X was looking 10yrs older; how they'd gained weight; how they were looking terrible (actually running out to Tesco for a pint of milk on a Tuesday morning). I remember finding copies of Jackie magazine that belonged to my Mum's sister in the 1970s and they were a lot about appearance, clothes, makeup etc. as well. |
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The Declan Rice gf thing was weird, people saying because he’s at Arsenal now he needs to get a upgrade. Like human beings are I phones or something. Half these insta models are catfishing anyway or caked in make up. Most important thing what you like as a person |
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"Do you think that we (society) generally still hold women to impossibly high beauty standards? All the talk you see about beauty standards being more diverse and accepting and following the story that Declan Rice‘s partner has been forced to delete her social media because of abuse she receives.
Are things really getting better? "
Not a woman so my input probably doesn’t carry much weight tbf. However I would say it does. All the “Woman’s” mags I’ve seen at my mom and dads etc are all extremely toxic towards woman’s appearance. The same really on social media as well as the internet and TV. The fact that society is more rewarding for woman (on a sliding scale) if they attain these high standers of beauty must have a negative impact and influence on young girls that brainwashes them into thinking the majority or all of their social worth is wrapped up in their appearance. Naturally I’m only guessing what it like and the impact by trying to put myself in their shoes but obviously as a guy I don’t truly know  |
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