FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Don’t go breaking my heart.
Don’t go breaking my heart.
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Have you ever had your heartbroken?
Does it still hurt, have you got over it, was it for the best in the end?
I had my heartbroken many years ago and I think it stayed with me for many many years without me really knowing it was there.
However nowadays I can look back and understand that actually although I still look back thinking how different my life would be now, I’m happy and I’m recovered from it.
If you’re hurting I’m sorry, but it will get better believe me, ultimately grief is a long process and is different for everybody, but it is part of life, a horrible part, but you will come through the other side.  |
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I have, even though I ended it.
It took well over 4 years and anti-depressants to get over the loss of him.
Nobody had ever loved me like he loved me. And I sometimes regret losing that, but there were other issues at play and for me they were non negotiable.
He would have been a great Dad too.
Time is a healer. Be it a few months or a few years, it does get better and you can look back with clarity and appreciate the good times without sobbing your tits off. |
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"I have, even though I ended it.
It took well over 4 years and anti-depressants to get over the loss of him.
Nobody had ever loved me like he loved me. And I sometimes regret losing that, but there were other issues at play and for me they were non negotiable.
He would have been a great Dad too.
Time is a healer. Be it a few months or a few years, it does get better and you can look back with clarity and appreciate the good times without sobbing your tits off."
Sobbing your tits off, you don’t want to do that with those beauties.
Forgive my flippancy but good for you taking that difficult step.  |
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I have.. almost 4 years ago now. Unfortunately he now lives with my now ex best friend 2 doors away so recovery has been hard, but I've progressed to wanting to slash his tires rather than cry in a corner rocking, I see this as progress...  haha.. don't worry, I won't actually stoop that low, but I will settle for a hot chap flinging me over his bonnet in front of their window... bitter? Me? Never.. |
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"
If you’re hurting I’m sorry, but it will get better believe me, ultimately grief is a long process and is different for everybody, but it is part of life, a horrible part, but you will come through the other side. "
Very true. I never had hamsters or rabbits as kid so had to learn the hard way in my early 20s. But I made sure to buy my kids hamsters to learn about love and loss as children not as adults |
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I seem to feel kind of heartbroken a lot. I don’t really know what causes me to feel like that, but whenever I meet someone romantically or just trying to make friendships, I tend to get slightly obsessed. That’s probably too strong of a word; maybe attached is a better way to describe it. I’ve been this way for a long time. I think maybe it’s because I’ve had mild ASD and ADHD since I was a child and found it difficult to make friendships or even romantically. I’ve found it difficult, as I’ve found flirting doesn’t come naturally to me, but I’m better at it now.
I think my mental health issues have made it even harder to meet people, as I started struggling at the start of COVID, and the lockdown made me extremely isolated. My mental health is massively improving, but I still don’t have any friends. I don’t mind being honest about this, but I’ve never had a girlfriend or been in any relationship. I’ve had sex on a one-night stand but regret it, as I wish I’d waited for when I was in a relationship. |
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By (user no longer on site) 26 weeks ago
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Of course I have. I’m not sure i will ever get over it, but I sure as hell have had to learn to live with it, or my other choice was to not. 
I love deeply, and when the leave, they leave a very big empty space in my heart. It hurts daily when I think of the life I had, the happiness I threw away, and the future that will never be.
But you are given another chance, a hope a friend who can turn to be the perfect person for you now, and you can fall in love again … but alas…. Maybe it’s not my heart that’s broken, but I am. Because I don’t seem to be able to hold on to anything I think is beautiful. That’s what is heartbreaking.
Maybe when I’m old, sat on a bench one day I will feel better. But until then… I wait for time to heal.
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"A couple of times. The only issue I have is that, due to the way my brain is wired, my head is fine, but my body goes through all the physiological effects which is strange and annoying."
That’s because you think your head is fine. |
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"I have.. almost 4 years ago now. Unfortunately he now lives with my now ex best friend 2 doors away so recovery has been hard, but I've progressed to wanting to slash his tires rather than cry in a corner rocking, I see this as progress... haha.. don't worry, I won't actually stoop that low, but I will settle for a hot chap flinging me over his bonnet in front of their window... bitter? Me? Never.. "
Well if being done on the bonnet of his car will help, I’m available Thursday.
It must feel like having your nose rubbed in it, but people that will do that to you, you are better off without. |
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"Of course I have. I’m not sure i will ever get over it, but I sure as hell have had to learn to live with it, or my other choice was to not.
I love deeply, and when the leave, they leave a very big empty space in my heart. It hurts daily when I think of the life I had, the happiness I threw away, and the future that will never be.
But you are given another chance, a hope a friend who can turn to be the perfect person for you now, and you can fall in love again … but alas…. Maybe it’s not my heart that’s broken, but I am. Because I don’t seem to be able to hold on to anything I think is beautiful. That’s what is heartbreaking.
Maybe when I’m old, sat on a bench one day I will feel better. But until then… I wait for time to heal.
"
Benches are great to sit, think, remember and look forwards. |
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By (user no longer on site) 26 weeks ago
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"Of course I have. I’m not sure i will ever get over it, but I sure as hell have had to learn to live with it, or my other choice was to not.
I love deeply, and when the leave, they leave a very big empty space in my heart. It hurts daily when I think of the life I had, the happiness I threw away, and the future that will never be.
But you are given another chance, a hope a friend who can turn to be the perfect person for you now, and you can fall in love again … but alas…. Maybe it’s not my heart that’s broken, but I am. Because I don’t seem to be able to hold on to anything I think is beautiful. That’s what is heartbreaking.
Maybe when I’m old, sat on a bench one day I will feel better. But until then… I wait for time to heal.
"
Well if I wasn't depressed before, thanks man.
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By (user no longer on site) 26 weeks ago
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"Of course I have. I’m not sure i will ever get over it, but I sure as hell have had to learn to live with it, or my other choice was to not.
I love deeply, and when the leave, they leave a very big empty space in my heart. It hurts daily when I think of the life I had, the happiness I threw away, and the future that will never be.
But you are given another chance, a hope a friend who can turn to be the perfect person for you now, and you can fall in love again … but alas…. Maybe it’s not my heart that’s broken, but I am. Because I don’t seem to be able to hold on to anything I think is beautiful. That’s what is heartbreaking.
Maybe when I’m old, sat on a bench one day I will feel better. But until then… I wait for time to heal.
Well if I wasn't depressed before, thanks man.
"
Do you wonder why I enjoyed the pass wink drink bang threads so much. They’re not as emotional !!’ |
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By (user no longer on site) 26 weeks ago
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"Of course I have. I’m not sure i will ever get over it, but I sure as hell have had to learn to live with it, or my other choice was to not.
I love deeply, and when the leave, they leave a very big empty space in my heart. It hurts daily when I think of the life I had, the happiness I threw away, and the future that will never be.
But you are given another chance, a hope a friend who can turn to be the perfect person for you now, and you can fall in love again … but alas…. Maybe it’s not my heart that’s broken, but I am. Because I don’t seem to be able to hold on to anything I think is beautiful. That’s what is heartbreaking.
Maybe when I’m old, sat on a bench one day I will feel better. But until then… I wait for time to heal.
Benches are great to sit, think, remember and look forwards. "
Your right, or you just look at your feet, and the chip paper wrappers  |
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"Of course I have. I’m not sure i will ever get over it, but I sure as hell have had to learn to live with it, or my other choice was to not.
I love deeply, and when the leave, they leave a very big empty space in my heart. It hurts daily when I think of the life I had, the happiness I threw away, and the future that will never be.
But you are given another chance, a hope a friend who can turn to be the perfect person for you now, and you can fall in love again … but alas…. Maybe it’s not my heart that’s broken, but I am. Because I don’t seem to be able to hold on to anything I think is beautiful. That’s what is heartbreaking.
Maybe when I’m old, sat on a bench one day I will feel better. But until then… I wait for time to heal.
Well if I wasn't depressed before, thanks man.
Do you wonder why I enjoyed the pass wink drink bang threads so much. They’re not as emotional !!’ "
You fucking what. Getting passed or even worse just skipped over to smash the hottie 5 above, the ultimate humiliation.  |
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By *hilloutMan 26 weeks ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
My first true girlfriend. I was 19. Deeply in love, completely smitten. She cheated on me with a colleague from uni basketball, then dumped me. Blindsided me like a freight train. Took me a year to get over her.
Looking back now with my experience, there were subtle signs that clearly showed the investment was far deeper on my end. My behaviour at the time would also have definitely fallen in the simp category. Heartbreaking at the time; pathetic when looked back with perspective that experience grants. Certainly a learning experience. |
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By (user no longer on site) 26 weeks ago
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"Of course I have. I’m not sure i will ever get over it, but I sure as hell have had to learn to live with it, or my other choice was to not.
I love deeply, and when the leave, they leave a very big empty space in my heart. It hurts daily when I think of the life I had, the happiness I threw away, and the future that will never be.
But you are given another chance, a hope a friend who can turn to be the perfect person for you now, and you can fall in love again … but alas…. Maybe it’s not my heart that’s broken, but I am. Because I don’t seem to be able to hold on to anything I think is beautiful. That’s what is heartbreaking.
Maybe when I’m old, sat on a bench one day I will feel better. But until then… I wait for time to heal.
Well if I wasn't depressed before, thanks man.
Do you wonder why I enjoyed the pass wink drink bang threads so much. They’re not as emotional !!’
You fucking what. Getting passed or even worse just skipped over to smash the hottie 5 above, the ultimate humiliation. "
Who knew, a heart can be broken 3 times. Thanks pal.  …
* Woody, makes a note to stay away from those threads from now on. |
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I've broken others' hearts, broken my own heart, and had my heart broken by others.
Deep love is an amazing thing, relationships can fail for numerous reasons, I still love all the people I've ever loved at some level, and I'm fairly confident that I prefer all the things I love doing without a regular/traditional relationship.
It's very hard to explain, but I can find as much romantic love as I need without classical relationships.
I think it's also a stage of life thing, so everyone will potentially be different, and an awareness that love is truly amazing, but for me at least, very ephemeral in the "must have this" stage of its cycle.
I'd never avoid more broken hearts, but I think I'm happy with what boils down to extracting maximum pleasure within an ever-decreasing pool of time...so love as "full-on relationship love" doesn't overly appeal, but love within other parameters would be considered.
Of course, love often doesn't work that way. So broken hearts don't either.
But I think I prefer a great game of tennis, philosophy, and a fair few other things to fill my time more pleasurably than love, over its entire course, provides.
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By *irthandgirthMan 26 weeks ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
"A couple of times. The only issue I have is that, due to the way my brain is wired, my head is fine, but my body goes through all the physiological effects which is strange and annoying.
That’s because you think your head is fine. "
I've had professionals look at it. It's all good. I just process emotions a little differently to get to the same conclusions. |
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By *eliWoman 26 weeks ago
. |
I've never had my heart broken romantically, no. Those times when it could have happened I've always held a little bit back due to uncertainty. Protected myself I guess.
I have had it broken by other events though. Not fully broken, more, there's a little crack or a little hole where that person, thing once resided.
I guess that's what grief is isn't it? When the love you had for another is gone and you can't pour it in to them any more.
It's also what love is. Nothing lasts forever yet the human capacity to love knowing that is a beautiful thing. It's cherishing those good times and knowing that you loved and were loved and it hurts but it won't hurt as keenly forever.
Apologies for the waffle! This thread was a timely one for me, the week ahead may be challenging but happy memories make it easier. |
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No, but I have broken someone else's and it was horrible and took me quite a while to get over the hurt I caused in ending a relationship that wasn't working for me any more (assuming I ever actually fully got over it). |
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"I've never had my heart broken romantically, no. Those times when it could have happened I've always held a little bit back due to uncertainty. Protected myself I guess.
I have had it broken by other events though. Not fully broken, more, there's a little crack or a little hole where that person, thing once resided.
I guess that's what grief is isn't it? When the love you had for another is gone and you can't pour it in to them any more.
It's also what love is. Nothing lasts forever yet the human capacity to love knowing that is a beautiful thing. It's cherishing those good times and knowing that you loved and were loved and it hurts but it won't hurt as keenly forever.
Apologies for the waffle! This thread was a timely one for me, the week ahead may be challenging but happy memories make it easier."
Wishing you strength when you need. X |
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"I've never had my heart broken romantically, no. Those times when it could have happened I've always held a little bit back due to uncertainty. Protected myself I guess.
I have had it broken by other events though. Not fully broken, more, there's a little crack or a little hole where that person, thing once resided.
I guess that's what grief is isn't it? When the love you had for another is gone and you can't pour it in to them any more.
It's also what love is. Nothing lasts forever yet the human capacity to love knowing that is a beautiful thing. It's cherishing those good times and knowing that you loved and were loved and it hurts but it won't hurt as keenly forever.
Apologies for the waffle! This thread was a timely one for me, the week ahead may be challenging but happy memories make it easier."
I hope the challenging week passes with the minimum of hurt. |
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By (user no longer on site) 26 weeks ago
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"I've never had my heart broken romantically, no. Those times when it could have happened I've always held a little bit back due to uncertainty. Protected myself I guess.
I have had it broken by other events though. Not fully broken, more, there's a little crack or a little hole where that person, thing once resided.
I guess that's what grief is isn't it? When the love you had for another is gone and you can't pour it in to them any more.
…."
Yep. Right there. |
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"When my baby daughter died, my heart just didn't break, it got shattered into a million and one pieces. No amount of time will ever repair the damage x"
Nothing can repair that. Tiny, tiny pieces maybe. But it's too big x. |
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By (user no longer on site) 26 weeks ago
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"When my baby daughter died, my heart just didn't break, it got shattered into a million and one pieces. No amount of time will ever repair the damage x"
No words but |
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By *ookie46Woman 26 weeks ago
Deepest darkest Peru |
I have been hurt by relationships ending but never felt heartbroken
Heartbroken is what i felt as I watched my grandson die in my daughters arms. Nothing prepares you for that. A piece of my heart went with him that day |
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By (user no longer on site) 26 weeks ago
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Yes, in more ways than one. Losing a 16 year relationship will do that to you. But as painful as it was, it was also the making of me. The mental and emotional scars take a long time to heal and maybe they never will, but the initial heartbreak gets better. You will be okay in time and reflection |
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By *ornycougaWoman 26 weeks ago
Wherever I lay my hat |
I had to think about this one. I think my first boyfriend broke my heart when he ended our relationship out of the blue. Since then I have been sad the relationships have come to an end, but not heartbroken as either I have ended it or they just ended amicably because one of us was moving away. |
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By *sWyldWoman 26 weeks ago
Edinburgh |
Yup. Several times over the last 5 years by the same person. Finally I've learnt my lesson but it still hurts every day. It also leaves me constantly wondering what's wrong with me and why I was such a fool and not good enough. |
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Romantically, no. I'm far too pragmatic (some would say cold-hearted) as far as that is concerned, people and circumstances change. Maybe it's because I've always had amicable break-ups.
My dogs dying though...each one of them has taken a piece of my heart with them when they've gone. |
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I've only ever had my heartbroken once and that's when my partner passed away.
It's been 18 months now but the pain is still the same
Some days are better than others. I'm struggling this week as there is something I was desperate to tell him.
I will always love him and never want anyone else after all its not his fault he died |
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About two years ago.
I used to equate it to a bulletproof vest that had taken hits but still would work, I haven’t thought that way in a while as I’m now thinking I won’t get involved like that with anyone again to the same depth. |
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broken, stomped on and thrown away - now its mine and wrapped in solid stuff - dont let anyone that close 