FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > I think I’ve disappointed people
I think I’ve disappointed people
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Wouldn’t know. I’m one of lifes winners.
But seriously, it depends on what it is. If it’s something I can fix I’ll make every effort to do so if I’m at fault. If it’s because someone has expectations of me that I can’t reach, then I find it’s good to talk through with someone neutral to the situation. It’s hard not to internalise it but talking it through can put things into perspective |
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"I feel guilty.
But I bet you haven't let people down, Pickle 
I feel guilty too.
On this occasion I think I have. "
Oh heck. All you can do is apologise and try to put it right or demonstrate that you will work to improve whatever it is. Messaging always open if you want to talk. |
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OP your in a rare group of people who actually give a shit about what others think.
Try to look at it in the positive that you care enough to feel this.
Many people nowadays couldn't give a flying fuck. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 42 weeks ago
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"I feel guilty.
But I bet you haven't let people down, Pickle
I feel guilty too.
On this occasion I think I have.
Oh heck. All you can do is apologise and try to put it right or demonstrate that you will work to improve whatever it is. Messaging always open if you want to talk. "
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By (user no longer on site) OP 42 weeks ago
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"OP your in a rare group of people who actually give a shit about what others think.
Try to look at it in the positive that you care enough to feel this.
Many people nowadays couldn't give a flying fuck."
Thank you that’s really lovely |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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I think it depends on the context.
We can’t keep everyone happy all of the time. Sometimes people will be disappointed in our choices/actions/answers. But if it’s a choice between what is right for us and makes us happy, sometimes we have to put ourselves first!!!
However
If we’re talking sexually….then I’d look at why and what I could do differently to improve the experience  |
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"Absolutely terrible if it’s people I care about 
God. Disappointing people we care about is top 3 worst feelings"
It really is.
I remember when I was a child, if my parents were mad I'd be upset but if they said they were disappointed in me I'd be distraught |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 42 weeks ago
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"I think it depends on the context.
We can’t keep everyone happy all of the time. Sometimes people will be disappointed in our choices/actions/answers. But if it’s a choice between what is right for us and makes us happy, sometimes we have to put ourselves first!!!
However
If we’re talking sexually….then I’d look at why and what I could do differently to improve the experience "
I think it is just one of those things I agree. But I also feel like I still feel shit. You know?
It’s not sexual dw. I don’t share those Ls publicly  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 42 weeks ago
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"Absolutely terrible if it’s people I care about
God. Disappointing people we care about is top 3 worst feelings
It really is.
I remember when I was a child, if my parents were mad I'd be upset but if they said they were disappointed in me I'd be distraught "
Parents knew what they were doing with that line though. Bastards |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"I think it depends on the context.
We can’t keep everyone happy all of the time. Sometimes people will be disappointed in our choices/actions/answers. But if it’s a choice between what is right for us and makes us happy, sometimes we have to put ourselves first!!!
However
If we’re talking sexually….then I’d look at why and what I could do differently to improve the experience
I think it is just one of those things I agree. But I also feel like I still feel shit. You know?
It’s not sexual dw. I don’t share those Ls publicly "
Yeah 100% it still feels horrendous but that’s how I try to rationalise it in my head. |
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This fear put me in therapy. The first time.
Mostly people care much less about us than we think. As a chronic people pleaser and overthinker, this took a while to sink in. Replaying conversations in my head is always a warning sign for me. There's a fine line between reflecting on things and getting stuck in a spiral of overthinking.
Of course there are times when this has actually happened and then it's apologising, acknowledging the impact and repairing the relationship.
Mrs TMN x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 42 weeks ago
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"This fear put me in therapy. The first time.
Mostly people care much less about us than we think. As a chronic people pleaser and overthinker, this took a while to sink in. Replaying conversations in my head is always a warning sign for me. There's a fine line between reflecting on things and getting stuck in a spiral of overthinking.
Of course there are times when this has actually happened and then it's apologising, acknowledging the impact and repairing the relationship.
Mrs TMN x"
So fair to say you feel pretty rubbish
I’m sorry |
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