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Seeing yourself through others eyes
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So MrPickle's mirror thread got me pondering. Again. I should probably avoid that but anyway, here we are regardless.
Do you think what you see in the mirror is what everyone else sees too?
For example - my friend thinks her arms look massive and ugly but I simply don't see it. Her arms are normal arms! Nothing wrong with them at all.
We both see her body but view it differently.
So, is that true of most of our internal insecurities? Massive to us but minor to others?
MrsAbz |
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"So MrPickle's mirror thread got me pondering. Again. I should probably avoid that but anyway, here we are regardless.
Do you think what you see in the mirror is what everyone else sees too?
For example - my friend thinks her arms look massive and ugly but I simply don't see it. Her arms are normal arms! Nothing wrong with them at all.
We both see her body but view it differently.
So, is that true of most of our internal insecurities? Massive to us but minor to others?
MrsAbz"
I think some people see themselves how they think others see them like others might not see anything wrong but if they see one little detail on themselves their mind could exaggerate it when they’re looking at themselves like that’s the case with me looking at myself in the mirror I always spot something wrong even though there might not be anything wrong |
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By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
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Probably not, but then I don't much care how others see me. I think I got past that after leaving school, life's too busy to be worrying about others opinions on what they see when they look at me. |
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The way I perceive myself does seem to be different to how my husband and some other people perceive me, yes. I think I'm enormously fat and I don't like it. I'm self conscious about how fat my tummy looks when I'm seated in the wheelchair. At one point, I'd built up really muscly arms and shoulders and I liked those, but my recent issues with food have resulted in them mainly melting away and my arms are now flabby and I hate them. My boobs have shrunk s bit and I don't like that either. The lack of oestrogen recently has seen my skin wrinkle and dry out - don't like it, feel like I've aged massively and I found my first gray hair too.
I feel like I'm falling to pieces and that I'm no longer me, for lots of reasons.
That's my confession for today, anyway  |
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By *929Man 36 weeks ago
newcastle |
I think we all prone to body dysmorphia to a certain degree, I always see self and think looking small, yet others at the gym say different think most of us see worse than we really are I have met a few that are the other way round though haha but thing majority of people are the first type |
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Nobody sees themselves as others see them physically or personality wise. That's why it's cultivating good self esteem in ourselves and encouraging it in others is so important. Otherwise you end up with a load of people constantly worrying what everyone else thinks of them |
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I have pondered this too, OP, but I have no answers to give. I know what I see in the mirror, but I have no clue at all what other people see. I am amazed whenever someone pays me a compliment - it doesn’t happen often - and I wonder what on Earth have they seen that I have missed. But why there is such a disparity, I have no clue. |
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By *a LunaWoman 36 weeks ago
South Wales |
I think I tend to look better than I actually do. My personal style is akin to that of Helena Bonham Carter, but if she were plus sized and had a much smaller income.
Other folk probably wince.
But who cares, life is too short for combing your hair!  |
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By *r TriomanMan 36 weeks ago
Chippenham Malmesbury area |
I realised that we never see ourselves or indeed anyone else as they actually are; all images go through some sort of lens then a processor (brain, digital, chemical..) therefore, even if both or these (lens, processor) were off the highest quality, with zero errors or imperfects, there will be some distortion to the image.
In terms of how we see ourselves, yes, we can massively over focus on minor bodily 'imperfections', which, ironically, people are unaware of until we point them out. |
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By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
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Most people project negative thinking in the mirror and no amount of compliments change that. I can guarantee that the little things we all obsess over, no one else cares. We'd all be a lot more secure if we could see ourselves through others eyes. |
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By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
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Self confidence and consciousness is a fine line with me.
I know, I look alright, and I don’t look my age or at least I don’t act my age. But if I stay too long in the mirror, I see the laughter lines around my eyes, I see the grey in my hair, and I just look older than I feel, so I do wonder that’s how people view me - older than I feel. |
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"Self confidence and consciousness is a fine line with me.
I know, I look alright, and I don’t look my age or at least I don’t act my age. But if I stay too long in the mirror, I see the laughter lines around my eyes, I see the grey in my hair, and I just look older than I feel, so I do wonder that’s how people view me - older than I feel. "
Once you get to about 55 everyone views you as older than you feel. You've got a while yet |
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By *hesblokeMan 36 weeks ago
Derbyshire village |
Had a chat with a friend about this earlier, we both decided to believe the other person - she thinks I'm hot (no way, far too thin etc.) and I think she's hot (she says not at all).
Sometimes you just have to agree to disagree. |
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and probably need glasses
MrsAbz
