FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Keep it on the forums
Keep it on the forums
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
I dip in and out of the forums and one reason I go AWOL is the number of DMs I get after posting on threads. Am I the only one that gets irritated by this?
If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
Not man bashing (honest), just genuinely curious. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I genuinely only DM from the forums if that is the specific point of the thread (ask in private, answer in public for example) or on a rare occasion to give someone genuine support when they may need it.
I certainly have never messaged someone from a forum to proposition them.
I do often have a cheeky browse and appreciate their pics however  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
|
I sometimes do if it’s something I don’t want to say out in public but I want to ask a further question or supply an answer -
It’s not to proposition anyone
But i do often get personal responses probably for the same reason but they can make me a little queezy and I ignore them. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It's very rare I'll DM someone from a forum post if it's not specifically a game, although today I did to say thank you to someone who made my day a little brighter - but that was it just a thank you.
I've leaned not to ever do a small penis forum post because my goodness my inbox 
Mrs |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I dip in and out of the forums and one reason I go AWOL is the number of DMs I get after posting on threads. Am I the only one that gets irritated by this?
If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
Not man bashing (honest), just genuinely curious."
So it's a guy thing? Thank god for that, gonna DM you you sexy thing,
Mrs x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ascaIMan 36 weeks ago
Cheshire Liverpool Manchester |
I’m currently in the process of typing a 10,000 word essay for you which’ll be with you shortly 
In all seriousness I normally only DM after receiving a wink or if I feel like I meet what somebody is looking for. Don’t want to add to the workload. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eliWoman 36 weeks ago
. |
Not really. If volume of messages makes me want to AWOL... I'd use my filters.
People DM off the back of threads. Not always for creepy reasons. Sometimes people might not want to flirt in public. That's fair. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
|
I don’t mind messages directly from the forums. I usually enjoy talking to people from forum posts more than I do the rest of the time. If I’m feeling bold enough too I’ll give someone a wink but I’m sometimes too shy…   |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"I genuinely only DM from the forums if that is the specific point of the thread (ask in private, answer in public for example) or on a rare occasion to give someone genuine support when they may need it.
I certainly have never messaged someone from a forum to proposition them.
I do often have a cheeky browse and appreciate their pics however "
I think we all have a cheeky browse 
A DM that is supportive or providing some specific info is completely different imho and always welcome |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
|
I never send the first message from the forums but have messaged if it's part of a thread and we've spoken before or I wanted to address their point or be a bit flirty without hijacking the thread as I know they would be ok with it.
I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting to start a conversation and I've loved them from women and couples who I've gone on to meet, but I get that doing it off the back of a thread where you just want to post your opinion isn't the way to go about it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"No you're not the only one. The rear of the Year comp has been a nightmare for me. I can't wait for it to finish so I can get back to my normal life"
The perils of having a sought after tush, eh?!  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"I sometimes do if it’s something I don’t want to say out in public but I want to ask a further question or supply an answer -
It’s not to proposition anyone
But i do often get personal responses probably for the same reason but they can make me a little queezy and I ignore them. "
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"No you're not the only one. The rear of the Year comp has been a nightmare for me. I can't wait for it to finish so I can get back to my normal life
The perils of having a sought after tush, eh?! "
You have a sought after tush... damn your filters haha,
Mrs x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"The Reply Privately should be made optional for users, probably disabled by default. I've known friends who have been upset by it, too frequently "
That would help but I guess there is nothing to stop people messaging after clicking on the profile |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Nope you're not hc.
I don't mind if someone genuinely wants to chat, about what's been posted.
What really gets on my wick though, are people who slide into dms just to be really creepy/pervy or get argumentative if they don't agree with what's been said.
I wish the site would remove the reply privately button at times, as it does stop me commenting on some things. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"It's very rare I'll DM someone from a forum post if it's not specifically a game, although today I did to say thank you to someone who made my day a little brighter - but that was it just a thank you.
I've leaned not to ever do a small penis forum post because my goodness my inbox
Mrs "
Lol. Yeah I guess I should give some threads a wide berth too! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"No you're not the only one. The rear of the Year comp has been a nightmare for me. I can't wait for it to finish so I can get back to my normal life
The perils of having a sought after tush, eh?! "
It's tough, isn't it? Most have been respectful and it's quite sweet. But some of the abuse I have received from some of my fellow competitors has been quite the eye opener |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
If someone fancies messaging someone else I don't see that it matters whether it comes from a search or a forum sighting.
The DM's I don't like is a contribution to a forum discussion but in my messages instead.
I just usually think it's someone who doesn't know how to reply in the forum.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *r_reusMan 36 weeks ago
Coventry |
"I dip in and out of the forums and one reason I go AWOL is the number of DMs I get after posting on threads. Am I the only one that gets irritated by this?
If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
Not man bashing (honest), just genuinely curious."
I'm a single male and get this surprisingly more often than you'd think.
I've found that sadly, many people on here are put off by the cliqueyness of the forums, and afraid to voice certain opinions which may make them unpopular if spoken in public, women especially, and so they choose to voice them in private.
I suppose for women in receipt of DMs from males it's different though, and they're probably just trying their luck? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
The ones where you mention that you’ve done something sexual and someone will message us direct to tell us how hot that is and give you a story of theirs, yet they don’t post on the thread at all
That annoys me!
Oh and people telling me privately that I’m the real winner of rear of the year - but I think that’s more cos they are scared of being attacked - I get that 
K |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"I dip in and out of the forums and one reason I go AWOL is the number of DMs I get after posting on threads. Am I the only one that gets irritated by this?
If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
Not man bashing (honest), just genuinely curious.So it's a guy thing? Thank god for that, gonna DM you you sexy thing,
Mrs x"
you'd need to ask Willy what his fan base consisted of! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"I’m currently in the process of typing a 10,000 word essay for you which’ll be with you shortly
In all seriousness I normally only DM after receiving a wink or if I feel like I meet what somebody is looking for. Don’t want to add to the workload."
Yeah I have messaged people off the forums but only if there is some indicator that they might want me to |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I dip in and out of the forums and one reason I go AWOL is the number of DMs I get after posting on threads. Am I the only one that gets irritated by this?
If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
Not man bashing (honest), just genuinely curious.So it's a guy thing? Thank god for that, gonna DM you you sexy thing,
Mrs x
you'd need to ask Willy what his fan base consisted of! "
It's been a mixture. Support and well wishes have come from both men and women 
Abuse has been from couples. I won't name drop, but they're in this thread |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *aizyWoman 36 weeks ago
west midlands |
"No you're not the only one. The rear of the Year comp has been a nightmare for me. I can't wait for it to finish so I can get back to my normal life
The perils of having a sought after tush, eh?!
It's tough, isn't it? Most have been respectful and it's quite sweet. But some of the abuse I have received from some of my fellow competitors has been quite the eye opener "
I called you an arse once, and I apologised!
It doesn't bother me tbh OP, I just treat it like any other msg I get, I'll eithr reply or I won't. And if I'm honest I would be a bit of a hypocrite if I did have a problem with it as I have done it myself a few times! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
As others have said I've only ever done it as part of a forum game or with someone I know and am already chatting to or meeting.
One of my funniest fab moments though was a few years ago when a very vocal fab lady started a thread exactly like this one and complaining how it was ridiculous.
I disagreed with something she said further down the thread and she messaged me privately to explain her thought process.
The irony wasn't lost on me and I took great pleasure in asking her publicly to keep it on the forum. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"Not really. If volume of messages makes me want to AWOL... I'd use my filters.
People DM off the back of threads. Not always for creepy reasons. Sometimes people might not want to flirt in public. That's fair. "
I have my filters open because I don't want to initiate contact, trade face pics and then turn them down  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I dip in and out of the forums and one reason I go AWOL is the number of DMs I get after posting on threads. Am I the only one that gets irritated by this?
If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
Not man bashing (honest), just genuinely curious.So it's a guy thing? Thank god for that, gonna DM you you sexy thing,
Mrs x
you'd need to ask Willy what his fan base consisted of! "
Who is Willy? Mrs x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
|
We don’t get a huge amount so it doesn’t bother me too much, they are easy to ignore if I’m not interested in engaging in a conversation with them.
I only do it when it’s part of a forum game or if I’ve spoken to them before. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"The ones where you mention that you’ve done something sexual and someone will message us direct to tell us how hot that is and give you a story of theirs, yet they don’t post on the thread at all
That annoys me!
Oh and people telling me privately that I’m the real winner of rear of the year - but I think that’s more cos they are scared of being attacked - I get that
K"
That's exactly what I'm talking about. Perhaps someone thinks it might be better received as a DM but it has the opposite effect with me if someone is just messaging to say that I, or something I have done, is hot |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"No you're not the only one. The rear of the Year comp has been a nightmare for me. I can't wait for it to finish so I can get back to my normal life
The perils of having a sought after tush, eh?!
It's tough, isn't it? Most have been respectful and it's quite sweet. But some of the abuse I have received from some of my fellow competitors has been quite the eye opener
I called you an arse once, and I apologised!
It doesn't bother me tbh OP, I just treat it like any other msg I get, I'll eithr reply or I won't. And if I'm honest I would be a bit of a hypocrite if I did have a problem with it as I have done it myself a few times! "
And you sent a few of those to me. I did think, shall I block this daisy woman or not. Then I thought, oh no leave it as I like all flowers, daisies, lillies and even an elephant's trunk. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"No you're not the only one. The rear of the Year comp has been a nightmare for me. I can't wait for it to finish so I can get back to my normal life
The perils of having a sought after tush, eh?!
It's tough, isn't it? Most have been respectful and it's quite sweet. But some of the abuse I have received from some of my fellow competitors has been quite the eye opener
I called you an arse once, and I apologised!
It doesn't bother me tbh OP, I just treat it like any other msg I get, I'll eithr reply or I won't. And if I'm honest I would be a bit of a hypocrite if I did have a problem with it as I have done it myself a few times! "
in response to Willy's post
And good on you for your honesty. I rate that |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"It happens quite a bit and we encourage people to get involved in the thread although there's quite a large percentage of people who say they can't as they have a permanent ban."
Blimey |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I dip in and out of the forums and one reason I go AWOL is the number of DMs I get after posting on threads. Am I the only one that gets irritated by this?
If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
Not man bashing (honest), just genuinely curious."
I keep getting distracted by your photos and hit the wrong button every time. Sorry, not sorry |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"As others have said I've only ever done it as part of a forum game or with someone I know and am already chatting to or meeting.
One of my funniest fab moments though was a few years ago when a very vocal fab lady started a thread exactly like this one and complaining how it was ridiculous.
I disagreed with something she said further down the thread and she messaged me privately to explain her thought process.
The irony wasn't lost on me and I took great pleasure in asking her publicly to keep it on the forum. "
Ha ha. I can imagine that was most satisfying. And I pinky swear I won't DM you |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"As others have said I've only ever done it as part of a forum game or with someone I know and am already chatting to or meeting.
One of my funniest fab moments though was a few years ago when a very vocal fab lady started a thread exactly like this one and complaining how it was ridiculous.
I disagreed with something she said further down the thread and she messaged me privately to explain her thought process.
The irony wasn't lost on me and I took great pleasure in asking her publicly to keep it on the forum.
Ha ha. I can imagine that was most satisfying. And I pinky swear I won't DM you "
FAF?! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"I dip in and out of the forums and one reason I go AWOL is the number of DMs I get after posting on threads. Am I the only one that gets irritated by this?
If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
Not man bashing (honest), just genuinely curious.So it's a guy thing? Thank god for that, gonna DM you you sexy thing,
Mrs x
you'd need to ask Willy what his fan base consisted of! Who is Willy? Mrs x"
Willy Idol - the one with the bum! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"We don’t get a huge amount so it doesn’t bother me too much, they are easy to ignore if I’m not interested in engaging in a conversation with them.
I only do it when it’s part of a forum game or if I’ve spoken to them before. "
Totally fair. And I have initiated contact as part of a game too |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I get pms on the back of threads. I either answer or ignore . If I post about certain subjects I know I'm going to get more pms. Doesn't bother me in the least certainly wouldn't go awol I'd just change my filters |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"I dip in and out of the forums and one reason I go AWOL is the number of DMs I get after posting on threads. Am I the only one that gets irritated by this?
If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
Not man bashing (honest), just genuinely curious.
I keep getting distracted by your photos and hit the wrong button every time. Sorry, not sorry"
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"As others have said I've only ever done it as part of a forum game or with someone I know and am already chatting to or meeting.
One of my funniest fab moments though was a few years ago when a very vocal fab lady started a thread exactly like this one and complaining how it was ridiculous.
I disagreed with something she said further down the thread and she messaged me privately to explain her thought process.
The irony wasn't lost on me and I took great pleasure in asking her publicly to keep it on the forum.
Ha ha. I can imagine that was most satisfying. And I pinky swear I won't DM you
FAF?! "
Missed you Big Balls |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I might start a conversation from a forum thread, but it's always platonic and if it's not answered I take the hint.
I used to really hate it when lurkers would message something about a thread - often almost like "I now know something about your sexual habits, this means you must have sex with me, yes?" (none of them were that overt, but it was often the theme). Fortunately that kind of message - or persistence after I ignore - is a good filter in and of itself. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
|
"I do this quite a bit . Probably the only time I message people. Hope it doesn’t make people want to leave
Do you send creepy messages with dick pics attached? If not, you're probably fine "
She fucking does |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I only ever DM you one handed… and get … you’re out of this persons age range… put your dick away and read the profile!! I think that’s what it says - after its says put your dick away I lose interest reading - you should DM me for a change… making me do all the chasing xx
If I come chasing after you Todge be afraid. Be very afraid! "
Ya don’t scare me - bring it on hotpants !! - also means we can chat whenever we want and not just here - which might be nice x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *os19Man 36 weeks ago
Edmonton |
I hardly ever hit the reply privately button or send a message to someone that has started a thread on a forum.If they want to message me privately about my comments on threads which has happened then fair enough I respond respectfully . |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I do this quite a bit . Probably the only time I message people. Hope it doesn’t make people want to leave
Do you send creepy messages with dick pics attached? If not, you're probably fine
She fucking does"
Only when I send your unsolicited dick pic back to you! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
|
"I do this quite a bit . Probably the only time I message people. Hope it doesn’t make people want to leave
Do you send creepy messages with dick pics attached? If not, you're probably fine
She fucking does
Only when I send your unsolicited dick pic back to you! "
And it’s horrible to look at  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
|
"I do this quite a bit . Probably the only time I message people. Hope it doesn’t make people want to leave
Do you send creepy messages with dick pics attached? If not, you're probably fine
She fucking does
Only when I send your unsolicited dick pic back to you!
And it’s horrible to look at "
Lesson learned |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I do this quite a bit . Probably the only time I message people. Hope it doesn’t make people want to leave
Do you send creepy messages with dick pics attached? If not, you're probably fine
She fucking does
Only when I send your unsolicited dick pic back to you!
And it’s horrible to look at
Lesson learned "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Don't really mind it, to be honest. At least it is different to the standard messages you get.
Profiles can be a little bit boring (we are sorely in need of an update of ours so equally to blame) and it can help spark off a conversation with a view of meeting.
There are other websites we use to post in forums, but this one caters for actually meeting people.
I do understand your point and I'm not saying you are wrong, but I'm not really sure if I would consider it impolite or anything. I suppose it depends a lot on your level of activity in forums and having to keep track of multiple conversations. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
|
"Not really. If volume of messages makes me want to AWOL... I'd use my filters.
People DM off the back of threads. Not always for creepy reasons. Sometimes people might not want to flirt in public. That's fair. "
This! I rarely get messages, which suits me fine. Message filters are good to have in place to stop the junk mail. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Another "not me, guv!" - I don't think I've ever sent a random "I've seen you on the forum and loved your insightful post about marmalade. FAF?" message.
But I do message people I've chatted to on the forum from threads if something springs to mind, so I guess I don't always "keep it to the forum" either. They'll be people I already have some sort of relationship with though.
The best message like that I've ever received was off the back of a thread about someone hating the team "train station" and a long explanation of their position on the matter. An important issue, but not one I was as invested in as they thought... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?"
I’m trying to think whether I’ve ever done this, and why.
Probably. And, erm … I think only when it’s been someone I already know from past forum chattering. Maybe a thread has moved on but I want to chat with them about what they said. I mean … I’d only do that if I figured they might want to chat with me about it as well.
But in trying to write that down I’ve realised that’s probably what the creepy fuckers who DM when they shouldn’t would say too. 
(I know some people DM me from a forum post because they’re banned. Which I figure is kind of a them problem, not a me problem …) |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *bi HaiveMan 36 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"I don't like lurker DMs based on thread responses. It unnerves me. People on the forum, on the thread, probably okay. "
This.
I've no issue with people extending a discussion off a thread so as not to derail it or seem to take it over.
But when people reply privately who haven't contributed it comes across as a bit odd. As if they don't want their opinion public for fear of upsetting people, putting folk off or because they want to say something they think will curry favour.
That's when it bugs me. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
I’m trying to think whether I’ve ever done this, and why.
Probably. And, erm … I think only when it’s been someone I already know from past forum chattering. Maybe a thread has moved on but I want to chat with them about what they said. I mean … I’d only do that if I figured they might want to chat with me about it as well.
But in trying to write that down I’ve realised that’s probably what the creepy fuckers who DM when they shouldn’t would say too.
(I know some people DM me from a forum post because they’re banned. Which I figure is kind of a them problem, not a me problem …)"
I'm aware of people who can no longer post in the forums but have asked others to post various comments on their behalf.
Most have rightly been told no but some did so and one or two actually acknowledged them in their post.
To me that is much more of a concern than just a random message on the back of a thread. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
|
Because chances are the public, don’t want to hear what I have to say when I’m being personally direct with the person I’m trying to talk to.
All the times I keep it on the forum and public and hopefully people read it find it funny.
But I’ve always found, flirting is a lot more personal in a DM  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
I’m trying to think whether I’ve ever done this, and why.
Probably. And, erm … I think only when it’s been someone I already know from past forum chattering. Maybe a thread has moved on but I want to chat with them about what they said. I mean … I’d only do that if I figured they might want to chat with me about it as well.
But in trying to write that down I’ve realised that’s probably what the creepy fuckers who DM when they shouldn’t would say too.
(I know some people DM me from a forum post because they’re banned. Which I figure is kind of a them problem, not a me problem …)
I'm aware of people who can no longer post in the forums but have asked others to post various comments on their behalf.
Most have rightly been told no but some did so and one or two actually acknowledged them in their post.
To me that is much more of a concern than just a random message on the back of a thread."
I should have added, I have never been asked to do this but I have been asked by people who can and do post here most days to post on their behalf on certain threads because they don't want a particular opinion to reflect badly on them.
They have never said that but it's pretty obvious why they won't post themselves.
I have always refused even if I do agree with their opinion because I wouldn't be true to myself if I did. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"
But in trying to write that down I’ve realised that’s probably what the creepy fuckers who DM when they shouldn’t would say too.
I had a similar moment of soul searching...
"
Yolo you and RTG are good boys. At least when it comes to me anyway! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
I’m trying to think whether I’ve ever done this, and why.
Probably. And, erm … I think only when it’s been someone I already know from past forum chattering. Maybe a thread has moved on but I want to chat with them about what they said. I mean … I’d only do that if I figured they might want to chat with me about it as well.
But in trying to write that down I’ve realised that’s probably what the creepy fuckers who DM when they shouldn’t would say too.
(I know some people DM me from a forum post because they’re banned. Which I figure is kind of a them problem, not a me problem …)
I'm aware of people who can no longer post in the forums but have asked others to post various comments on their behalf.
Most have rightly been told no but some did so and one or two actually acknowledged them in their post.
To me that is much more of a concern than just a random message on the back of a thread."
Every day is a school day. I had no idea that this type of "cash for questions" activity was a thing |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The Reply Privately should be made optional for users, probably disabled by default. I've known friends who have been upset by it, too frequently
That would help but I guess there is nothing to stop people messaging after clicking on the profile "
The determined will climb over most walls and will message. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
I’m trying to think whether I’ve ever done this, and why.
Probably. And, erm … I think only when it’s been someone I already know from past forum chattering. Maybe a thread has moved on but I want to chat with them about what they said. I mean … I’d only do that if I figured they might want to chat with me about it as well.
But in trying to write that down I’ve realised that’s probably what the creepy fuckers who DM when they shouldn’t would say too.
(I know some people DM me from a forum post because they’re banned. Which I figure is kind of a them problem, not a me problem …)
I'm aware of people who can no longer post in the forums but have asked others to post various comments on their behalf.
Most have rightly been told no but some did so and one or two actually acknowledged them in their post.
To me that is much more of a concern than just a random message on the back of a thread.
Every day is a school day. I had no idea that this type of "cash for questions" activity was a thing "
We should take this to a Select Committee. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
But in trying to write that down I’ve realised that’s probably what the creepy fuckers who DM when they shouldn’t would say too.
I had a similar moment of soul searching...
Yolo you and RTG are good boys. At least when it comes to me anyway! "
Bollocks. Must try harder. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
If it seems like someone has a genuinely interesting opinion or experience and isnt just signalling i will send a DM. Its fine if they dont want to respond but how else do you get beyond the superficial ? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
But in trying to write that down I’ve realised that’s probably what the creepy fuckers who DM when they shouldn’t would say too.
I had a similar moment of soul searching...
Yolo you and RTG are good boys. At least when it comes to me anyway!
Bollocks. Must try harder."
If your bollocks are really hard, you should consult a doctor*
*Please note, this does not constitute medical advice. We recommend you consult a doctor for medical advice. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"No you're not the only one. The rear of the Year comp has been a nightmare for me. I can't wait for it to finish so I can get back to my normal life"
I'll be your PA if you like mate, send them my way. Haha |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"
But in trying to write that down I’ve realised that’s probably what the creepy fuckers who DM when they shouldn’t would say too.
I had a similar moment of soul searching...
Yolo you and RTG are good boys. At least when it comes to me anyway!
Bollocks. Must try harder.
If your bollocks are really hard, you should consult a doctor*
*Please note, this does not constitute medical advice. We recommend you consult a doctor for medical advice. "
I'm happy to give a first opinion |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Sometimes I do this for lolz
Most of the time i do it to re-emphasise support or agreement.
I’ve had some interesting engagements off the back of forum conversations and someone replying privately |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The Reply Privately should be made optional for users, probably disabled by default. I've known friends who have been upset by it, too frequently "
yes I wish this was an option. Some absolute rubbish comes through often.
I will message on rare occasion xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"If it seems like someone has a genuinely interesting opinion or experience and isnt just signalling i will send a DM. Its fine if they dont want to respond but how else do you get beyond the superficial ? "
Believe me, the type DMs I am talking about are superficial and could have been posted on a thread! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *irthandgirthMan 36 weeks ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
"I dip in and out of the forums and one reason I go AWOL is the number of DMs I get after posting on threads. Am I the only one that gets irritated by this?
If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
Not man bashing (honest), just genuinely curious."
If I DM from a thread it's normally something pertinent to the specific post, but could derail the thread or be a little too controversial. But I choose my audience (normally would have interacted before).
Other than that I will normally send recipes if someone likes the sound of something I have put on a food thread. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Yolo you and RTG are good boys. At least when it comes to me anyway! "
When I see you next weekend, I’m going to remind you that you called me a good boy.*
.
.
.
.
(*And then I’m going to duck. Or run.) |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"Yolo you and RTG are good boys. At least when it comes to me anyway!
When I see you next weekend, I’m going to remind you that you called me a good boy.*
.
.
.
.
(*And then I’m going to duck. Or run.) "
No need to duck. It's below the belt you need to worry about.
As I'm so short I mean |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
You're on a website designed for sex hookups, with a gallery of extremely porn-ified pictures, with bukkake, anal, two-cock blowjobs, etc, and you wonder why men message you in this way, and not that?
LOL fucking hell.
SMH. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I dip in and out of the forums and one reason I go AWOL is the number of DMs I get after posting on threads. Am I the only one that gets irritated by this?
If you DM, why do you? Rather than testing the water on the forums first to see if you get a flirty reply? Embarrassed go public? Or what?
Not man bashing (honest), just genuinely curious."
That’s me not gonna dm |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"No need to duck. It's below the belt you need to worry about."
Oh, I’m not worried about below the belt. I trust your skills down there.
"As I'm so short I mean "
Oh. Ah. Of course. That’s what I meant too. Ahem.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"You're on a website designed for sex hookups, with a gallery of extremely porn-ified pictures, with bukkake, anal, two-cock blowjobs, etc, and you wonder why men message you in this way, and not that?
LOL fucking hell.
SMH."
It’s a website designed for swingers. Which has over time morphed to **adults** seeking like minded adults for ***respectful*** fun.
I can see why that subtlety may be difficult for you.
SMH |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Sometimes I do this for lolz
Most of the time i do it to re-emphasise support or agreement.
I’ve had some interesting engagements off the back of forum conversations and someone replying privately "
I too have had interesting asides from pms |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"You're on a website designed for sex hookups, with a gallery of extremely porn-ified pictures, with bukkake, anal, two-cock blowjobs, etc, and you wonder why men message you in this way, and not that?
LOL fucking hell.
SMH.
It’s a website designed for swingers. Which has over time morphed to **adults** seeking like minded adults for ***respectful*** fun.
I can see why that subtlety may be difficult for you.
SMH "
Wow. Clearly I am "asking for it". What a silly little lady I am. Thank you for enlightening me |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I get this loads but they blur in amongst all the other messages I get. Honestly - it’s a full time job doing fabmin! I sometimes wish I was less sexy.
I let guys message me and keep all my filters open so forum friends can say hi. I genuinely like it when it’s someone with whom I regularly interact in the lounge, but when it’s ‘Bigboi6969’ saying “Yeah I like sausage and chips too” or “Can I come and suck you off?”, just ugh.
Loungers can say hi.
Lurkers can fuck off.
PS: HC - how many DMs did this thread generate?!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I get this loads but they blur in amongst all the other messages I get. Honestly - it’s a full time job doing fabmin! I sometimes wish I was less sexy.
I let guys message me and keep all my filters open so forum friends can say hi. I genuinely like it when it’s someone with whom I regularly interact in the lounge, but when it’s ‘Bigboi6969’ saying “Yeah I like sausage and chips too” or “Can I come and suck you off?”, just ugh.
Loungers can say hi.
Lurkers can fuck off.
PS: HC - how many DMs did this thread generate?!!"
You don't mind talking food with me |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I get this loads but they blur in amongst all the other messages I get. Honestly - it’s a full time job doing fabmin! I sometimes wish I was less sexy.
I let guys message me and keep all my filters open so forum friends can say hi. I genuinely like it when it’s someone with whom I regularly interact in the lounge, but when it’s ‘Bigboi6969’ saying “Yeah I like sausage and chips too” or “Can I come and suck you off?”, just ugh.
Loungers can say hi.
Lurkers can fuck off.
PS: HC - how many DMs did this thread generate?!!
You don't mind talking food with me "
And guess what I had for dinner tonight!!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I get this loads but they blur in amongst all the other messages I get. Honestly - it’s a full time job doing fabmin! I sometimes wish I was less sexy.
I let guys message me and keep all my filters open so forum friends can say hi. I genuinely like it when it’s someone with whom I regularly interact in the lounge, but when it’s ‘Bigboi6969’ saying “Yeah I like sausage and chips too” or “Can I come and suck you off?”, just ugh.
Loungers can say hi.
Lurkers can fuck off.
PS: HC - how many DMs did this thread generate?!!
You don't mind talking food with me
And guess what I had for dinner tonight!!! "
Pheasant breast à l’orange with dried apricots & prosciutto |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I get this loads but they blur in amongst all the other messages I get. Honestly - it’s a full time job doing fabmin! I sometimes wish I was less sexy.
I let guys message me and keep all my filters open so forum friends can say hi. I genuinely like it when it’s someone with whom I regularly interact in the lounge, but when it’s ‘Bigboi6969’ saying “Yeah I like sausage and chips too” or “Can I come and suck you off?”, just ugh.
Loungers can say hi.
Lurkers can fuck off.
PS: HC - how many DMs did this thread generate?!!"
I got one from your snogging thread…I’m shite with messages so I’ll probably forget to look at it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I get this loads but they blur in amongst all the other messages I get. Honestly - it’s a full time job doing fabmin! I sometimes wish I was less sexy.
I let guys message me and keep all my filters open so forum friends can say hi. I genuinely like it when it’s someone with whom I regularly interact in the lounge, but when it’s ‘Bigboi6969’ saying “Yeah I like sausage and chips too” or “Can I come and suck you off?”, just ugh.
Loungers can say hi.
Lurkers can fuck off.
PS: HC - how many DMs did this thread generate?!!
I got one from your snogging thread…I’m shite with messages so I’ll probably forget to look at it "
You’ll just have to snog your hand in front of the mirror instead |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"I get this loads but they blur in amongst all the other messages I get. Honestly - it’s a full time job doing fabmin! I sometimes wish I was less sexy.
I let guys message me and keep all my filters open so forum friends can say hi. I genuinely like it when it’s someone with whom I regularly interact in the lounge, but when it’s ‘Bigboi6969’ saying “Yeah I like sausage and chips too” or “Can I come and suck you off?”, just ugh.
Loungers can say hi.
Lurkers can fuck off.
PS: HC - how many DMs did this thread generate?!!
You don't mind talking food with me "
I will chat about sausages and sausage rolls with anyone till the cows come home
To answer your question Felix, it only generated 4 messages. They know who they are and that I welcome the bants! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If someone fancies messaging someone else I don't see that it matters whether it comes from a search or a forum sighting.
The DM's I don't like is a contribution to a forum discussion but in my messages instead.
I just usually think it's someone who doesn't know how to reply in the forum.
"
Now you see I do do this from time to time, if a reply to a forum post is something I would rather not put out there, so to speak but the person is deserving of an answer to whatever matter they have specifically raised with me. I wouldn’t do it as a reply to a general forum question. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"You're on a website designed for sex hookups, with a gallery of extremely porn-ified pictures, with bukkake, anal, two-cock blowjobs, etc, and you wonder why men message you in this way, and not that?
LOL fucking hell.
SMH."
If you make her hide her vids, I'll do more than SMH. I'll probably tut really loudly too. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ornycouga OP Woman 36 weeks ago
NOT IN THE UK Wherever I lay my hat |
"You're on a website designed for sex hookups, with a gallery of extremely porn-ified pictures, with bukkake, anal, two-cock blowjobs, etc, and you wonder why men message you in this way, and not that?
LOL fucking hell.
SMH.
If you make her hide her vids, I'll do more than SMH. I'll probably tut really loudly too."
Oooh I bet you are double hot when you are angry |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *irthandgirthMan 36 weeks ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
"You're on a website designed for sex hookups, with a gallery of extremely porn-ified pictures, with bukkake, anal, two-cock blowjobs, etc, and you wonder why men message you in this way, and not that?
LOL fucking hell.
SMH.
It’s a website designed for swingers. Which has over time morphed to **adults** seeking like minded adults for ***respectful*** fun.
I can see why that subtlety may be difficult for you.
SMH
Wow. Clearly I am "asking for it". What a silly little lady I am. Thank you for enlightening me "
Self filtering at its finest there. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
|
Some are definitely creepy... But i also DM people off the back of threads, with good/platonic intentions so i can't throw stones in my glass house!!
I'll ignore /delete any i find unhappy reading |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Some are definitely creepy... But i also DM people off the back of threads, with good/platonic intentions so i can't throw stones in my glass house!!
I'll ignore /delete any i find unhappy reading "
Sensible. People just sometime DM for nice reasons. I had a lovely one earlier witj someone sharing a pic of their amazing meal they had. O thought that was a lovely thing to do. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Some are definitely creepy... But i also DM people off the back of threads, with good/platonic intentions so i can't throw stones in my glass house!!
I'll ignore /delete any i find unhappy reading "
sorry about that |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"You're on a website designed for sex hookups, with a gallery of extremely porn-ified pictures, with bukkake, anal, two-cock blowjobs, etc, and you wonder why men message you in this way, and not that?
LOL fucking hell.
SMH.
If you make her hide her vids, I'll do more than SMH. I'll probably tut really loudly too.
Oooh I bet you are double hot when you are angry "
Like a brown Hulk...
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 36 weeks ago
|
"Some are definitely creepy... But i also DM people off the back of threads, with good/platonic intentions so i can't throw stones in my glass house!!
I'll ignore /delete any i find unhappy reading "
Platonic. Is that what sending nudes are? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 34 weeks ago
|
Tbh when I do the guess the cock bra size one, sometimes it's very popular which is why I suggest people either reply on forum or dm
I guess however it depends on the nature of the post |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
ooh i feel ousted as a bit of a lurker and a DM'er
my excuse is i never know what to say and you all seem to have it anyway
and DM because no one can message me cause of the filters -
back to lurking |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Why is someone said to be “embarrassed” if the DM someone from a forum thread? Surely it’s a positive way to break the ice with someone on a thread they find attractive
Whatever happens the DMs to someone uninterested, regardless, will just delete or not read the DM but equally they may read and connection made
Safe to say I don’t see the issue  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
. What’s the protocol again?
You can't think of any better reason to message? Lol - Xeno
