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Make something up about the person….

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By *r Sprout OP   Man 38 weeks ago

the middle

Above

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple 38 weeks ago

Leeds

Steals fruit from the supermarket to put down his pants.

Mrs

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By *uke OzadeMan 38 weeks ago

Ho Chi Minge City


"Steals fruit from the supermarket to put down his pants.

Mrs "

Wanted in 7 counties for ‘groom theft’

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Was patient zero for the "Scromf" outbreak

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By *inAndTonic21Couple 38 weeks ago

Merseyside


"Steals fruit from the supermarket to put down his pants.

Mrs

Wanted in 7 counties for ‘groom theft’"

Has a secret obsession for giant Jammie dodgers

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By *uffolkBeardedswingerMan 38 weeks ago

Ipswich


"Steals fruit from the supermarket to put down his pants.

Mrs

Wanted in 7 counties for ‘groom theft’

Has a secret obsession for giant Jammie dodgers "

Hates gin and tonic

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 38 weeks ago

St Leonards


"Steals fruit from the supermarket to put down his pants.

Mrs "

Overnight, her nipples suddenly upgraded to Orgasmotron Mk IV status. The wild shaking is ecstasy, but the cold, wet puddle of happiness.....not so much .

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By *searchingMan 38 weeks ago

hmmm


"Has a secret obsession for giant Jammie dodgers "

Convinced the night is young until they’ve had a 22nd Gin and tonic?!

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By *iasubTV/TS 38 weeks ago

Ilkeston


"Steals fruit from the supermarket to put down his pants.

Mrs

Wanted in 7 counties for ‘groom theft’

Has a secret obsession for giant Jammie dodgers

Hates gin and tonic "

Is actually from norfolk

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple 38 weeks ago

Southampton


"Steals fruit from the supermarket to put down his pants.

Mrs

Wanted in 7 counties for ‘groom theft’

Has a secret obsession for giant Jammie dodgers

Hates gin and tonic "

Doesn't haveca beard and actually lives in Norfolk

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By *r Sprout OP   Man 38 weeks ago

the middle


"Doesn't haveca beard and actually lives in Norfolk "

Has spent the year constructing the world's coldest ice cube

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By *olarbear73Man 38 weeks ago

Glasgow


"Doesn't haveca beard and actually lives in Norfolk

Has spent the year constructing the world's coldest ice cube"

Really wanted to be called Mr Butternut Squash but that user name was taken

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple 38 weeks ago

Southampton


"Doesn't haveca beard and actually lives in Norfolk

Has spent the year constructing the world's coldest ice cube

Really wanted to be called Mr Butternut Squash but that user name was taken "

Has bear paws for hands

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By *onameyet2Man 38 weeks ago

chorley

Invented the worlds strongest acid

Currently looking for something to put it in

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By *sWyldWoman 38 weeks ago

Edinburgh


"Doesn't haveca beard and actually lives in Norfolk

Has spent the year constructing the world's coldest ice cube

Really wanted to be called Mr Butternut Squash but that user name was taken

Has bear paws for hands "

She's actually a spy

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By *onameyet2Man 38 weeks ago

chorley


"Doesn't haveca beard and actually lives in Norfolk

Has spent the year constructing the world's coldest ice cube

Really wanted to be called Mr Butternut Squash but that user name was taken

Has bear paws for hands

She's actually a spy"

Yes this is my man disguise

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By *lint-EverhardMan 38 weeks ago

Perpignan and cap

Is the leader of a Columbian cartel and is on the FBIs most wanted list.

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By *ickshawedCouple 38 weeks ago

Wolverhampton

Is Brucey's fuck buddy, but they like to keep it quiet

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By *atter3127Man 38 weeks ago

stoke on trent

They own a successful cucumber farm catering exclusively to the swinging and kink community.

They’ve also been trialing carrots too but can’t get enough of them to grow that have two carrots growing from one end…

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By *orthtosouthMan 38 weeks ago

Sheffield


"They own a successful cucumber farm catering exclusively to the swinging and kink community.

They’ve also been trialing carrots too but can’t get enough of them to grow that have two carrots growing from one end…"

Everything they touch turns into skittles

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By *amhorniestMan 38 weeks ago

Surrey

Is the leader of a secret underground super race

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By *onameyet2Man 38 weeks ago

chorley


"They own a successful cucumber farm catering exclusively to the swinging and kink community.

They’ve also been trialing carrots too but can’t get enough of them to grow that have two carrots growing from one end…

Everything they touch turns into skittles"

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By *valanche1001Man 38 weeks ago

Leeds

Can only be seen in a mirror, is otherwise invisible

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By *illy IdolMan 38 weeks ago

Midlands


"Can only be seen in a mirror, is otherwise invisible "

Got kicked out of the swimming pool for having an erection

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By *BootyfulDayWoman 38 weeks ago


"Can only be seen in a mirror, is otherwise invisible

Got kicked out of the swimming pool for having an erection "

Was runner up at Pop Idol with his Bon Jovi cover

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By *batMan 38 weeks ago

Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales)


"Was runner up at Pop Idol with his Bon Jovi cover "

Prefers short, serious, bald men.

Hates porridge, loves ewoks.

Gbat

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By *oystaanMan 38 weeks ago

Waterford

Was a 1980's porn star in German movies

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By *ympha LuxuriaWoman 38 weeks ago

La La Land


"Was a 1980's porn star in German movies "

Was Fonzie's double in Happy Days

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By *uke OzadeMan 38 weeks ago

Ho Chi Minge City


"Was a 1980's porn star in German movies

Was Fonzie's double in Happy Days "

Once sent her dildo collection to the Ashmoleum Museum for an expert valuation

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan 38 weeks ago

A den in the Glen


"Was a 1980's porn star in German movies

Was Fonzie's double in Happy Days

Once sent her dildo collection to the Ashmoleum Museum for an expert valuation"

Cycled to Land's End without a saddle on and loved every minute, electing for the cobbled roads everytime.

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Completed football manager

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By *agnar73Man 38 weeks ago

glasgow-ish


"Was a 1980's porn star in German movies

Was Fonzie's double in Happy Days

Once sent her dildo collection to the Ashmoleum Museum for an expert valuation

Cycled to Land's End without a saddle on and loved every minute, electing for the cobbled roads everytime."

Has equipment for Asparagus measuring and assessment, one of only four in the UK qualified

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By *ruceyyMan 38 weeks ago

London


"Was a 1980's porn star in German movies

Was Fonzie's double in Happy Days

Once sent her dildo collection to the Ashmoleum Museum for an expert valuation

Cycled to Land's End without a saddle on and loved every minute, electing for the cobbled roads everytime.

Has equipment for Asparagus measuring and assessment, one of only four in the UK qualified "

Has a pet name for each of his chest hairs

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Caries his balls in a samsonite fannypack.

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By *estarossa.Woman 38 weeks ago

Flagrante


"Caries his balls in a samsonite fannypack."

Is completely obsessed with soft whip iceceam, but developing it in black has been a nightmare. Perfecting the dye without it turning green, and looking like mouldy cheese made his business plan tank, and he had to do a lookalike job as Johnny Depp to fund more research!

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By *ndtheswingersMan 38 weeks ago

colchester


"Caries his balls in a samsonite fannypack.

Is completely obsessed with soft whip iceceam, but developing it in black has been a nightmare. Perfecting the dye without it turning green, and looking like mouldy cheese made his business plan tank, and he had to do a lookalike job as Johnny Depp to fund more research!"

Her surname is Tickles

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

This man isn’t a big fan of walkers bugles

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By *r Sprout OP   Man 38 weeks ago

the middle

Spent over £10,000 on an onion ring at the jewellers.

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By *iasubTV/TS 38 weeks ago

Ilkeston


"Spent over £10,000 on an onion ring at the jewellers."

Actually prefers carrots over sprouts

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By *avinaTVTV/TS 38 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"Spent over £10,000 on an onion ring at the jewellers.

Actually prefers carrots over sprouts"

Has dedicated her mum's attic to a truly prodigious collection of Wombles merchandise.

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By *leanandkeenMan 38 weeks ago

jarrow

Done a helicopter and slapped me in the face leaving a shlong mark on my cheek

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By *illy IdolMan 38 weeks ago

Midlands

Has a guiness world record for cleaning the most dishes in 2 minutes

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By *educing_EmCouple 38 weeks ago

Tipperary


"Has a guiness world record for cleaning the most dishes in 2 minutes "

Considering a BBL

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By *rill PhilMan 38 weeks ago

Crediton


"Has a guiness world record for cleaning the most dishes in 2 minutes

Considering a BBL"

Em keeps sending me messaged begging me to meet her. I was going to but, she's gotten so desperate for me I'm a little scared. I've heard she has a shrine to me in every room in her home and even a mini one in the boot of her car.

She keeps hanging around outside my house waiting for me. I also believe she has my face and real name tattooed on her partners chest so she can look at me while he has sex with her.

Its a bit frightening.

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By *educing_EmCouple 38 weeks ago

Tipperary


"Has a guiness world record for cleaning the most dishes in 2 minutes

Considering a BBL

Em keeps sending me messaged begging me to meet her. I was going to but, she's gotten so desperate for me I'm a little scared. I've heard she has a shrine to me in every room in her home and even a mini one in the boot of her car.

She keeps hanging around outside my house waiting for me. I also believe she has my face and real name tattooed on her partners chest so she can look at me while he has sex with her.

Its a bit frightening. "

You were supposed to make something up jeez

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By *ean counterMan 38 weeks ago

Market Harborough / Kettering

Its a long way to their home town

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By *rill PhilMan 38 weeks ago

Crediton


"Has a guiness world record for cleaning the most dishes in 2 minutes

Considering a BBL

Em keeps sending me messaged begging me to meet her. I was going to but, she's gotten so desperate for me I'm a little scared. I've heard she has a shrine to me in every room in her home and even a mini one in the boot of her car.

She keeps hanging around outside my house waiting for me. I also believe she has my face and real name tattooed on her partners chest so she can look at me while he has sex with her.

Its a bit frightening.

You were supposed to make something up jeez "

Sorry but, the truth had to come out sometime Em! It's been 4 years now!

I've been very restrained in not calling the police (even after I found you in my bathroom that night!) IF you're not careful, I'll stop holding myself back and you'll find you're the one being restrained!

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By *avinaTVTV/TS 38 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"Its a long way to their home town "

Actually prefers to count peas.

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By *r Sprout OP   Man 38 weeks ago

the middle

Spends Thursday morning serving tea and coffee to OAP’s at the local church

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple 38 weeks ago

Southampton


"Spends Thursday morning serving tea and coffee to OAP’s at the local church "

Crochets Willy warmers but calls them pot handle socks

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By *atgirl and RobinCouple 38 weeks ago

Durham


"Spends Thursday morning serving tea and coffee to OAP’s at the local church

Crochets Willy warmers but calls them pot handle socks"

Was born with webbed feet enabling her to swim really fast

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By *ife NinjaMan 38 weeks ago

Dunfermline


"Spends Thursday morning serving tea and coffee to OAP’s at the local church

Crochets Willy warmers but calls them pot handle socks"

Been known to hang around the docks pulling ice creams out of her private parts

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple 38 weeks ago

Southampton


"Spends Thursday morning serving tea and coffee to OAP’s at the local church

Crochets Willy warmers but calls them pot handle socks

Was born with webbed feet enabling her to swim really fast"

I don't get called duck for nothing!

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By *ris GrayMan 38 weeks ago

Dorchester

She's married with 6 kids and oldest works in a chip shop

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By *ex HolesMan 38 weeks ago

Up North

ROFL isn’t that what happens on here anyway

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By *valanche1001Man 38 weeks ago

Leeds


"ROFL isn’t that what happens on here anyway "

^^^^^

Actually King Charles’s secret fab account - fact

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Buys lots of fake tan, goes to Brighton for holidays but tells everyone he's been to South Anerica!

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Mine is for Fred!

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By *oystaanMan 38 weeks ago

Waterford

[Removed by poster at 06/03/24 09:26:56]

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By *rispyDuckMan 38 weeks ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

Is the Bishop at our local church

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By *quirrel!Man 38 weeks ago

Nearby


"Is the Bishop at our local church "

Smells of strawberries, is actually quite soft and has never quacked in his life!

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By *andy CanesWoman 38 weeks ago

south

Eats cream cakes all day

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By *agicfunMan 38 weeks ago

leeds

Known her for years use to baby sit me … and fucked all night :p xxx

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By *andy CanesWoman 38 weeks ago

south


"Known her for years use to baby sit me … and fucked all night :p xxx"

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By *ark.aitkenMan 38 weeks ago

Newcastle


"Known her for years use to baby sit me … and fucked all night :p xxx"

Had an amazing DVP with his wife

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By *agicfunMan 38 weeks ago

leeds


"Known her for years use to baby sit me … and fucked all night :p xxx "

:p xxxx love her she’s amazing

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By *ark.aitkenMan 38 weeks ago

Newcastle


"Known her for years use to baby sit me … and fucked all night :p xxx "

She's made all those pics if our gangbang private again

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By *quirrel!Man 38 weeks ago

Nearby


"Eats cream cakes all day "

That’s actually true!

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Played rugby

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By *ad NannaWoman 38 weeks ago

East London

Tickles trout on his day off.

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By *ingu and The ApeCouple 38 weeks ago

The Igloo

Sleeps standing up.

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 38 weeks ago

St Leonards


"Sleeps standing up. "

Bonobos come to them for advice.

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By *arrySwindonMan 38 weeks ago

Swindon

Is an aftershave model

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By *atter3127Man 38 weeks ago

stoke on trent


"Sleeps standing up.

Bonobos come to them for advice."

Once auditioned to be a body double on naked attraction

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By *valanche1001Man 38 weeks ago

Leeds

Sent to prison in 1972 for a crime they didn’t commit, promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground, they survive today as a soldier of fortune.

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan 38 weeks ago

A den in the Glen


"Sent to prison in 1972 for a crime they didn’t commit, promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground, they survive today as a soldier of fortune. "

He ain't gettin on no plane

* Gives a glass of milk

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By *valanche1001Man 38 weeks ago

Leeds


"Sent to prison in 1972 for a crime they didn’t commit, promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground, they survive today as a soldier of fortune.

He ain't gettin on no plane

* Gives a glass of milk"

Crazy fool!

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By *ympha LuxuriaWoman 38 weeks ago

La La Land

His number one fantasy is to be woken up by a man urinating all over him

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By *ris GrayMan 38 weeks ago

Dorchester

Shes a secret lemonade drinker

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By *valanche1001Man 38 weeks ago

Leeds


"Shes a secret lemonade drinker "

Woke me up by weeing on me

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Cought him in bed with my wife, looks like they were having fun

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By *elix SightedMan 38 weeks ago

Cloud 8

Is Donald Trump’s deputy dingleberry wrangler. Missed out on the top spot for eating some.

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By *ris GrayMan 38 weeks ago

Dorchester

He is a secret agent for Al kyeda

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Once wrestled a koala and lost

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By *ris GrayMan 38 weeks ago

Dorchester

She stuck an iguana up her fanny and its never been seen again

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By *ilverfox for youMan 38 weeks ago

Hull

Sausage and 2 sprouts for tea

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By *ltrMan 38 weeks ago

sheffield

They wrote harry Potter and jk Rowling stole it

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By *r Black 85Man 38 weeks ago

nottingham

Owns the world's largest swingers club

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By *ris GrayMan 38 weeks ago

Dorchester

He loves smash

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 38 weeks ago

St Leonards


"He loves smash "

Had to increase his home security after the 18th Pornhub porn star in succession declared her undying passion for him.

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By *iddlesticksMan 38 weeks ago

My nan’s spare room.

Has only been to the toilet once in the last 17 years.

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Bought the bottle that Kinga used in Big Brother at an auction for £1000.

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By *o_yeur_eyes_onlyMan 38 weeks ago

Londontown


"Has only been to the toilet once in the last 17 years. "

His balls have blue eyes.....true story

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By *educing_EmCouple 38 weeks ago

Tipperary

Walks around with that jumbo sized phone in front of his face because he's not for your eyes

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By *elix SightedMan 38 weeks ago

Cloud 8

Once undertook the astronaut apprenticeship scheme. Failed because, when trying the zero gravity simulator, her fart clouds went downwards and she was declared “a proper wrongun” by nasa.

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By *rill PhilMan 38 weeks ago

Crediton

Once tried to burn himself the ground for the insurance money but, stopped when he realised melted cheese didn't react like petrol.

He spend 5 years in a psychiatric hospital before being released due to cutbacks

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple 38 weeks ago

Leeds

Lost a finger in a fight with a seagull over chips.

The mr

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By *agicfunMan 38 weeks ago

leeds

Was best man at his wedding and fucked his wife in her dress same night became great friends

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By *hat.coupleCouple 38 weeks ago

Dartford

Mrs is allergic to limo, little known fact

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By *iddlesticksMan 38 weeks ago

My nan’s spare room.


"Mrs is allergic to limo, little known fact"

They’re that couple they are.

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By *hat.coupleCouple 38 weeks ago

Dartford


"Mrs is allergic to limo, little known fact"

Lino not limo, but she maybe allergic to limos too. I haven't checked

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By *rill PhilMan 38 weeks ago

Crediton


"Lost a finger in a fight with a seagull over chips.

The mr "

It was a pigeon but, close.

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By *hat.coupleCouple 38 weeks ago

Dartford


"Mrs is allergic to limo, little known fact

They’re that couple they are. "

We certainly are! How did you find out?

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By *iddlesticksMan 38 weeks ago

My nan’s spare room.


"Mrs is allergic to limo, little known fact

They’re that couple they are.

We certainly are! How did you find out?"

They post their status updates on the House of Commons daily update bulletins.

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By *hat.coupleCouple 38 weeks ago

Dartford


"Mrs is allergic to limo, little known fact

They’re that couple they are.

We certainly are! How did you find out?

They post their status updates on the House of Commons daily update bulletins. "

Damn! I'll have to stop doing that

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By *andy CanesWoman 38 weeks ago

south


"Eats cream cakes all day

That’s actually true! "

your looking good on it

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By *ortyairCouple 38 weeks ago

Wallasey

Her nipples are actually heart shaped, taste of strawberries too,

Mrs x

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Once stole a freddo as they only had a 1 euro coin on them

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By *ympha LuxuriaWoman 38 weeks ago

La La Land

Was a mermaid in his past life

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By *rill PhilMan 38 weeks ago

Crediton

Can do a triple backflip from a seated position.

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago


"Was a mermaid in his past life"

Stop reading my LinkedIn profile.

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By *iddlesticksMan 38 weeks ago

My nan’s spare room.


"Can do a triple backflip from a seated position."

His comedy stage name is Phil Brill.

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By *ortyairCouple 38 weeks ago

Wallasey


"Can do a triple backflip from a seated position.

His comedy stage name is Phil Brill. "

Could be a bikeshed lurker from his school days haha, Mrs x

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By *rill PhilMan 38 weeks ago

Crediton


"Can do a triple backflip from a seated position.

His comedy stage name is Phil Brill. "

It's actually Hugh Floppycock.

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By *educing_EmCouple 38 weeks ago

Tipperary

Tattle tales on poor innocent women

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By *iddlesticksMan 38 weeks ago

My nan’s spare room.


"Tattle tales on poor innocent women "

Has three times the staying power of the average nymphomaniac.

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By *hubs101Man 38 weeks ago

West Midlands

Has been know to button up shirt

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By *atter3127Man 38 weeks ago

stoke on trent

Got asked to leave the Conservative Party for having standards that are “too low even by my standards!” as declared by Boris Johnson.

Is now running the election campaign for Donald trump after that glowing recommendation…

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By *valanche1001Man 38 weeks ago

Leeds

Ryan Renolds’s stunt double

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple 38 weeks ago

Southampton


"Ryan Renolds’s stunt double "

Is the chief manufacturer of sky hooks

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

They are the bases of the modern movement of lust.

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Attends church every Sunday, and always judges the best grown cucumber at the village fayre!

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By *oldAndBoundlessMan 38 weeks ago

Bradford


"Attends church every Sunday, and always judges the best grown cucumber at the village fayre!"

Likes to watch re runs of dads army in his briefs on a Thursday

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago


"Attends church every Sunday, and always judges the best grown cucumber at the village fayre!

Likes to watch re runs of dads army in his briefs on a Thursday "

Watches iron man on reruns and comments on how sexy he looks in the suit

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By *parkle1974Woman 38 weeks ago

Leeds

Likes to keeps his hands warm by putting them in his pants

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago


"Likes to keeps his hands warm by putting them in his pants "

I’ll take it haha

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By *valanche1001Man 38 weeks ago

Leeds

His first job was delivering the holes for doughnuts

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By *ysizeMan 38 weeks ago

Nottingham (ish)

Hung like a Donkey

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By *parkle1974Woman 38 weeks ago

Leeds

Doesn't own any tops

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By *ysizeMan 38 weeks ago

Nottingham (ish)


"Doesn't own any tops "

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By *elix SightedMan 38 weeks ago

Cloud 8

Her fab name comes from her propensity for wearing lit sparklers up her bumhole while being rogered in the face.

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By *valanche1001Man 38 weeks ago

Leeds


"Her fab name comes from her propensity for wearing lit sparklers up her bumhole while being rogered in the face."

Is about to be sued for libel by sparkle

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By *parkle1974Woman 38 weeks ago

Leeds


"Her fab name comes from her propensity for wearing lit sparklers up her bumhole while being rogered in the face."

Sparklers are for amateurs

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan 38 weeks ago

A den in the Glen


"Her fab name comes from her propensity for wearing lit sparklers up her bumhole while being rogered in the face.

Sparklers are for amateurs "

Felched Gove

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By *oldAndBoundlessMan 38 weeks ago

Bradford


"Her fab name comes from her propensity for wearing lit sparklers up her bumhole while being rogered in the face.

Sparklers are for amateurs "

Secretly indulges on beans and toast calls it skin heads on a raft

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By *valanche1001Man 38 weeks ago

Leeds


"Her fab name comes from her propensity for wearing lit sparklers up her bumhole while being rogered in the face.

Sparklers are for amateurs

Secretly indulges on beans and toast calls it skin heads on a raft "

Rides his cow to the pub on Sundays

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By *oldAndBoundlessMan 38 weeks ago

Bradford


"Her fab name comes from her propensity for wearing lit sparklers up her bumhole while being rogered in the face.

Sparklers are for amateurs

Secretly indulges on beans and toast calls it skin heads on a raft

Rides his cow to the pub on Sundays "

I call her spot

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By *issYeuxBleusWoman 38 weeks ago

My boudoir - S Wales


"Her fab name comes from her propensity for wearing lit sparklers up her bumhole while being rogered in the face.

Sparklers are for amateurs

Secretly indulges on beans and toast calls it skin heads on a raft

Rides his cow to the pub on Sundays "

Goes swimming in his bath. 100 lengths to the taps and back

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan 38 weeks ago

A den in the Glen


"Her fab name comes from her propensity for wearing lit sparklers up her bumhole while being rogered in the face.

Sparklers are for amateurs

Secretly indulges on beans and toast calls it skin heads on a raft

Rides his cow to the pub on Sundays

Goes swimming in his bath. 100 lengths to the taps and back "

Hates balls/scrotums and sacs

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By *issYeuxBleusWoman 38 weeks ago

My boudoir - S Wales


"Her fab name comes from her propensity for wearing lit sparklers up her bumhole while being rogered in the face.

Sparklers are for amateurs

Secretly indulges on beans and toast calls it skin heads on a raft

Rides his cow to the pub on Sundays

Goes swimming in his bath. 100 lengths to the taps and back

Hates balls/scrotums and sacs"

Blasphemy!!!!!

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple 38 weeks ago

Manchester-ish


"Her fab name comes from her propensity for wearing lit sparklers up her bumhole while being rogered in the face.

Sparklers are for amateurs

Secretly indulges on beans and toast calls it skin heads on a raft

Rides his cow to the pub on Sundays

Goes swimming in his bath. 100 lengths to the taps and back

Hates balls/scrotums and sacs

Blasphemy!!!!!"

Has a passion for nuclear power!

J

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By *issYeuxBleusWoman 38 weeks ago

My boudoir - S Wales


"Her fab name comes from her propensity for wearing lit sparklers up her bumhole while being rogered in the face.

Sparklers are for amateurs

Secretly indulges on beans and toast calls it skin heads on a raft

Rides his cow to the pub on Sundays

Goes swimming in his bath. 100 lengths to the taps and back

Hates balls/scrotums and sacs

Blasphemy!!!!!

Has a passion for nuclear power!

J"

I’m borderline expert in this field

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By *amie HantsWoman 38 weeks ago

Atlantis

Eats a Creme Egg with a spoon.

Very uncomfortable to watch but insists on including it in foreplay.

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Is NOT just a bunch of squirrels in a trench coat

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By *naswingdressWoman 38 weeks ago

Manchester (she/her)

Is actually Frank Beans

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By *ust MikeMan 38 weeks ago

Yaxley


"Is NOT just a bunch of squirrels in a trench coat"

Was rejected as the next James Bond for being too hench…

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Tired a Mike drop. Then realised there was no-one to post.

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By *occerstar579Man 38 weeks ago

Berwick


"Is actually Frank Beans"

Likes her meet and 1 veg!

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By *avinaTVTV/TS 38 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"Tired a Mike drop. Then realised there was no-one to post."

Owns an extensive collection of pickled bums.

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By *asisfan25Man 38 weeks ago

Essex

[Removed by poster at 06/03/24 23:39:37]

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By *avinaTVTV/TS 38 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"Is actually Frank Beans

Likes her meet and 1 veg!"

Consistently fails to understand the offside rule... and prefers American Football anyway.

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Once knocked a coconut off at the fair with his penis

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By *asisfan25Man 38 weeks ago

Essex

Has a rainbow coloured unicorm shouting blue tacos

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By *avinaTVTV/TS 38 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"Has a rainbow coloured unicorm shouting blue tacos"

Secretly prefers Blur...

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By *aptain Caveman41Man 38 weeks ago

Home

Champion bog snorkeler

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Likes looking through letterboxes

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By *valanche1001Man 38 weeks ago

Leeds


"Likes looking through letterboxes "

Keeps his trimmed pubes and stuffs cushions with them

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago


"Likes looking through letterboxes

Keeps his trimmed pubes and stuffs cushions with them "

Thought a toaster was a bath bomb...

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago


"Likes looking through letterboxes

Keeps his trimmed pubes and stuffs cushions with them "

Got fired from Abercrombie & Fitch as a door topless model cause they couldn’t handle the crowd

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By *ris GrayMan 38 weeks ago

Dorchester

He has a technicoloured dream coat but he's never had a dream in his life

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By *estarossa.Woman 38 weeks ago

Flagrante

Paints smurf figurines as a hobby

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By *esire in SheffieldMan 38 weeks ago

Sheffield

She is going to buy a new lingerie from Amazon tomorrow and will have delivery issues.

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By *ormalfornorfolkMan 38 weeks ago

Norwich

Is going to have more sex than he can possibly dream of….

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By *an_spMan 38 weeks ago

Coventry

Had a cousin who worked in the set of “Titanic” and James Cameron told him, that if he was one inch taller we would totally play Jack

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By *estarossa.Woman 38 weeks ago

Flagrante

Played bass with a prog rock band at Uni

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By *valanche1001Man 38 weeks ago

Leeds


"Played bass with a prog rock band at Uni"

Keeps the underpants of all her previous meets and has seen them into a duvet cover

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By *valanche1001Man 38 weeks ago

Leeds


"Played bass with a prog rock band at Uni

Keeps the underpants of all her previous meets and has seen them into a duvet cover "

*sewn

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By *ark.aitkenMan 38 weeks ago

Newcastle


"Played bass with a prog rock band at Uni

Keeps the underpants of all her previous meets and has seen them into a duvet cover

*sewn "

In a similar vein...

He keeps all his dead hair...for making up underwear

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By *ris GrayMan 38 weeks ago

Dorchester

Hes a politician who doesn't bullshit

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By *inAndTonic21Couple 38 weeks ago

Merseyside


"Steals fruit from the supermarket to put down his pants.

Mrs

Wanted in 7 counties for ‘groom theft’

Has a secret obsession for giant Jammie dodgers

Hates gin and tonic "

hahaha that’s good

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By *he turned me GreyCouple 38 weeks ago

Warwick and Coventry


"Hes a politician who doesn't bullshit "

Fred lives in a world of monochrome

Mr

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By *needabrewMan 38 weeks ago

the hills


"Hes a politician who doesn't bullshit

Fred lives in a world of monochrome

Mr "

Are really Richard and Judy

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By *hubs101Man 38 weeks ago

West Midlands

Has a pet snail called Speedy

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By *ensible lady 1960Woman 38 weeks ago

Near Bishop Auckland.

my ex hubby who took off with a man

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By *inAndTonic21Couple 38 weeks ago

Merseyside


"Has a pet snail called Speedy"

Really likes to take recreational drugs!

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By *ark.aitkenMan 38 weeks ago

Newcastle


"Has a pet snail called Speedy

Really likes to take recreational drugs! "

Is secretly in love with one of the above posters.....but who?

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By *hubs101Man 38 weeks ago

West Midlands


"Has a pet snail called Speedy

Really likes to take recreational drugs! "

Blimey You read my profile lol

And ..

Likes more than ice & a slice in their G&T

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By *ris GrayMan 38 weeks ago

Dorchester

[Removed by poster at 07/03/24 16:46:42]

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By *ris GrayMan 38 weeks ago

Dorchester

He or she is a virgin at whatever age they've reached but willing to try anything neopolitan

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