FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Lack Of Male Pictures In Profiles
Lack Of Male Pictures In Profiles
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
this may have been mentioned before but as im faily new here im wondering why have so few profiles actually have pics of the man. I mean if you expect to swing with someone surely a body pic at least. Even peoples friends gallery there is no male pics. Now if me and my good lady want to meet someone we need to get an idea of what kind of physique the man and woman has but as there is no male pics it makes you think the guy has got nothing going for him.
Do people actually meet without seeing any pics of the men ? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
we have met a few couples "blind" and have been pleasently surprised too on those occaisions. In our experience most pics are out of date anyway, but we do prefer to see pics who we are meeting.
xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Jack and I actually met on a blind date some 28yrs ago, so meeting without pics doesn't fill us with trepidation. We don't play on a first date, well rarely, lol, so we can always walk away if we choose. Perhaps we are wieard, but we don't see it as a major obstacle, but each to their own. It certainly gives the proposed meet a bit of an "edge", lol  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
What people put on their profile in the way of written description and pictures is their own personal choice and so long as they are happy with what they have achieved none of us has the right to question them for it.
If we see a profile that lacks what is required to spark an interest in us we simply move on.
There are more than enough profiles that fit the bill for us, so for us life is way to short to worry about this sort of trivia  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
As I see it, so long as pictures are available in some way on here before a meet I'm happy. I certainly wouldn't put face pics on my profile but have them in Private when needed xxx xxx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I would suggest that being as it's the female that most people are interested in then that's the person that will mostly be shown in profiles. The majority of couples profiles that i have seen state that the female is bisexual while the man is straight so it's always going to be the female that 'sells' so to speak. There are couples who want to see what the man looks like too but from what i have seen the only one alot of people are mainly interested in is the lady...hence the majority of pics in a profile will be hers! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hi,
We've got some in our private gallery of Steve with me and I always attach if we're chatting wiht someone new. We'd never, ever, in a million years meet anyone if we hadn't seen a pic 1st! Z"
Likewise.... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
ive found, not many seem to look like their pics, even when their recent ones..
You can be pleasantly surprised, or unpleasantly surprised if you base your decisions on pics alone
much easier to meet then decide... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
I just wish I knew how to airbrush as well as some people
Rob is in our private pics as we're not looking for any more couples at the moment so no need for him to be out in public
He'll come out again at some point  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
"if u realy want photos editing i can do them for you"
Thank you sweetheart thats really kind of you but id rather scare people by pic first, and if they want to meet me after that then its their own fault |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I do like to see pics of both in a couple, I know people can look different or use old pics etc but you do get a good idea, hopefully. It isn't always just about 'looks' though, just like to see them! If I'm going to be having sex with both the mans as well as the lady, I do need to see him as well as her! Z |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"surely you should not have to ask for pictures it should be there in the profile to be seen.  "
.
Each to their own. There is no "rule" about a profile must have pics!
Some people are more "private" than the others  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *umourCouple
over a year ago
Rushden |
"What people put on their profile in the way of written description and pictures is their own personal choice and so long as they are happy with what they have achieved none of us has the right to question them for it.
If we see a profile that lacks what is required to spark an interest in us we simply move on."
PC twaddle!!!
So what if it is their choice??? So what if it works for them??? We DO have a right to question because we all have the right of free speech, as far as it goes.
Sex on the beach have asked a legitimate question and it is one that despite being in the "scene" for about 11 years, we still don't understand, why there are no pics of the male! People hide behind "personal choice" because it is easy to not have to comply with the basics that we would certainly expect!
This is a statement to comply with some peoples PC ethos...
Although I disagree with the content of your post, I can see that it is your opinion and I accept that as your right to hold, however I may or may not agree or disagree with other statements on this or any other post and reserve the right to post my agreement/disagreement as I choose. This is in no way the view of both of us in this household and Mrs Rumour reserves the right to agree or disagree with either Mr Rumour (me) or any other poster.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"surely you should not have to ask for pictures it should be there in the profile to be seen.
.
Each to their own. There is no "rule" about a profile must have pics!
Some people are more "private" than the others "
Good point !!...the majority of swingers on this and other sites dont actually advertise their wares, until they decide the time is right for them.. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ig badMan
over a year ago
Up North :-) |
"as a single guy who meets cpls
i don`t give a hoot what the guy looks like "
You don't?
Me if i am on t job i kind of want to make sure that her bloke doesn't look like chunk from the goonies if he is behind me at any point.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I would suggest that being as it's the female that most people are interested in then that's the person that will mostly be shown in profiles. The majority of couples profiles that i have seen state that the female is bisexual while the man is straight so it's always going to be the female that 'sells' so to speak. There are couples who want to see what the man looks like too but from what i have seen the only one alot of people are mainly interested in is the lady...hence the majority of pics in a profile will be hers!"
The fact that the woman is bi matters not a jot!
She's still going to be playing with the guy that means that she has to fancy him.
Couple that with for the most part the woman usualy has the casting vote on whether to meet or not, then we'd say its imperative that the guys pics are on the profile.
We won't accept any winks or friends requests that don't have pics of BOTH halves of the couple.
XXXX |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What people put on their profile in the way of written description and pictures is their own personal choice and so long as they are happy with what they have achieved none of us has the right to question them for it.
If we see a profile that lacks what is required to spark an interest in us we simply move on.
PC twaddle!!!
So what if it is their choice??? So what if it works for them??? We DO have a right to question because we all have the right of free speech, as far as it goes.
Sex on the beach have asked a legitimate question and it is one that despite being in the "scene" for about 11 years, we still don't understand, why there are no pics of the male! People hide behind "personal choice" because it is easy to not have to comply with the basics that we would certainly expect!
This is a statement to comply with some peoples PC ethos...
Although I disagree with the content of your post, I can see that it is your opinion and I accept that as your right to hold, however I may or may not agree or disagree with other statements on this or any other post and reserve the right to post my agreement/disagreement as I choose. This is in no way the view of both of us in this household and Mrs Rumour reserves the right to agree or disagree with either Mr Rumour (me) or any other poster. "
PC Twaddle oh how that made me chuckle, politeness is now PC.....
I am going to pick one word from your whole post which pretty much sums up the gulf in the difference in thought process we have. It comes at the end of your second paragraph and its EXPECT!
We EXPECT absolutely nothing from any one person or couple on this site, we HOPE for quite a few things but we EXPECT nothing.
We fully ACCEPT that it is the right of each and everyone who joins this site to put exactly what they are comfortable with on their profile and long may that continue.
Because we feel that way we would never question profile content and simply use our own judgement when looking for potential friends. If a profile lacks what we like we move on, it really is that simple folks.
As an aside, and because of our total commitment toward discretion, with regards to this side of our lives we steer completely clear of profiles with faces in the public viewing area.
For us, and we stress FOR US, anyone happy enough to publicly declare in that manner is a risk simply not worth taking.
However because it is the individual right of each and every member to put exactly what they want on their profile we don't question it, we simply choose to ignore it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
as a chatroom mod i have brought this subject up many times.. too many blank profiles .. and too many pretending to be couples etc when they aint. suppose its a difficult one to sort.
If they have pics are they theirs,, we have know people to have other peoples pics on their profiles.. obviously action is taken.. i feel people should only be allowed to join if they have pics.. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"as a chatroom mod i have brought this subject up many times.. too many blank profiles .. and too many pretending to be couples etc when they aint. suppose its a difficult one to sort.
If they have pics are they theirs,, we have know people to have other peoples pics on their profiles.. obviously action is taken.. i feel people should only be allowed to join if they have pics.. "
You are always going to be up against these things, when the site is free....if it cost £300 quid to join...then a lot of the multi profiles or multi personalities would disappear...then you'd probably find theres only 150 swingers in the whle country..... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"as a chatroom mod i have brought this subject up many times.. too many blank profiles .. and too many pretending to be couples etc when they aint. suppose its a difficult one to sort.
If they have pics are they theirs,, we have know people to have other peoples pics on their profiles.. obviously action is taken.. i feel people should only be allowed to join if they have pics.. "
You just answered your own question there, what guarantee do we have that any of the pictures on any of the profiles are genuine 
Some would then say verifications would prove that but it's a piece of cake to put up "fake" verifications.
The only way you get to know what someone is really like is to meet them.
Anyone daft enough to believe everything written on a profile or daft enough to believe all the pictures posted are genuine and up to date is quite likely to get their arse bitten on numerous occasions in their swinging life.
For us a profile is simply the very first indicator and as such we take it with a largish pinch of salt.
We gain way much more of a feel during the initial phone conversation. It's amazing the things you pick up from all four chatting on the phone and you very quickly get a warm or cold feeling about who you are chatting with.
The final step is the meet for a drink and that needs no further explanation.
Reading too much into profiles is a waste of heartbeats |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"this may have been mentioned before but as im faily new here im wondering why have so few profiles actually have pics of the man. I mean if you expect to swing with someone surely a body pic at least. Even peoples friends gallery there is no male pics. Now if me and my good lady want to meet someone we need to get an idea of what kind of physique the man and woman has but as there is no male pics it makes you think the guy has got nothing going for him.
Do people actually meet without seeing any pics of the men ?"
If we were to play with couples then we would expect to see both of the couple before a meet, not on pics but just to show their face on a cam...and we would do the same.
As we only look for straight MFM, the single men who want to play don't really care what the male half looks like as they are not playing with him, although we do still show both our faces on cam. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I recon the reason they hide the male pic is that so many are munters. Loads of hot women on here with ugly husbands
Mind you there are a couple of hot guys with munter partners hehehehehe |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I recon the reason they hide the male pic is that so many are munters. Loads of hot women on here with ugly husbands
Mind you there are a couple of hot guys with munter partners hehehehehe"
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
We cannot see a problem with people having full face and body (clothed is fine) pictures in thier private galleries.
If they decide someone is trustworthy enough to meet they can attach those pictures in the mail they send to the selected few.
We don't use the friends list, we use the hotlist to keep up with people we are interested in or our friends, so this is the only way we can see such pictures.
We will never meet on blind dates ie having seen only a picture of one member of the couple or pictures of only body parts etc. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I recon the reason they hide the male pic is that so many are munters. Loads of hot women on here with ugly husbands
Mind you there are a couple of hot guys with munter partners hehehehehe"
And a few munters without partners would be doing the site a favour by hiding their pics |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I recon the reason they hide the male pic is that so many are munters. Loads of hot women on here with ugly husbands
Mind you there are a couple of hot guys with munter partners hehehehehe
And a few munters without partners would be doing the site a favour by hiding their pics "
LMAO...want to start a reign of terror? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"this may have been mentioned before but as im faily new here im wondering why have so few profiles actually have pics of the man. I mean if you expect to swing with someone surely a body pic at least. Even peoples friends gallery there is no male pics. Now if me and my good lady want to meet someone we need to get an idea of what kind of physique the man and woman has but as there is no male pics it makes you think the guy has got nothing going for him.
Do people actually meet without seeing any pics of the men ?
If we were to play with couples then we would expect to see both of the couple before a meet, not on pics but just to show their face on a cam...and we would do the same.
As we only look for straight MFM, the single men who want to play don't really care what the male half looks like as they are not playing with him, although we do still show both our faces on cam."
I agree with you about the cam. We have face pics of us both in our private gallery but I'm not going to send them to just anyone who asks. A webcam is a better option I think ... you can please some of the people some of the time, but not all of the people all of the time |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
As an aside, and because of our total commitment toward discretion, with regards to this side of our lives we steer completely clear of profiles with faces in the public viewing area.
For us, and we stress FOR US, anyone happy enough to publicly declare in that manner is a risk simply not worth taking.
"
When you used the word discretion we are assuming you mean it in the terms of
judicious in one's conduct or speech, esp. with regard to respecting privacy or maintaining silence about something of a delicate nature (dictionary.com)
Are you implying that all people with such profiles are incapable of being discreet with regards to the privacy of other people that they meet?.
As for the original question:
We have no issues in having full body shots and face pictures of both of us on the public areas of this site as all of them are already available on our own websites and facebook pages. We keep other pictures in our friends area but as we only accept friends invites from people we have actually met and got on with then that is not an issue and we are not concerned about finding our picures posted all over the tabloid press or local rag.
You dont get to know people until you have met them, but on sites like this, your profile effectively becomes your advert to others to initiate a contact with you.
The textual content of a profile can impart a sense of your attitude towards this lifestyle and give an indication of what you are looking for, but whether we care to admit it or not, the primary driving force for human attraction is visual and thats where photographs sell yourself.
For profiles on this site the use of photographs as part of a profile increases the chances that it will be looked at and therefore contacted, because the search facility lets you ignore profiles without pictures.
As others have stated in this and other threads, in most cases its the female that makes the yes/no decicion towards meeting potential new playmates. Not all of them are looking for some bi play and we are sure that a significant proportion of the ladies get frustrated at the lack of male photographs on profiles to assist them in making that decision.
But having said all that we do meet up with people (mostly at our place) and have no idea what they look like until we answer the door to them. To us, the personality of the people we meet is key to building up friendships and if you cant be friends then you should not f**k.
Primary visual stimulation engaged.
Visual override thought processes activated.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Do people actually meet without seeing any pics of the men ?
Flippin' eck - was such a lovely, easy, straight forward question!!!! War & Peace required? Nah - just a yes or no dependent upon your standpoint! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Do people actually meet without seeing any pics of the men ?
Flippin' eck - was such a lovely, easy, straight forward question!!!! War & Peace required? Nah - just a yes or no dependent upon your standpoint!"
The OP also raised the oft bantered issue of no male pics on profiles so it's not as simple as a yes or no |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Do people actually meet without seeing any pics of the men ?
Flippin' eck - was such a lovely, easy, straight forward question!!!! War & Peace required? Nah - just a yes or no dependent upon your standpoint!
The OP also raised the oft bantered issue of no male pics on profiles so it's not as simple as a yes or no "
I understand that, and did agree with much of your own posts, there are loads of profiles without any male pics at all - we just ask for one! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Do people actually meet without seeing any pics of the men ?
Flippin' eck - was such a lovely, easy, straight forward question!!!! War & Peace required? Nah - just a yes or no dependent upon your standpoint!
The OP also raised the oft bantered issue of no male pics on profiles so it's not as simple as a yes or no
I understand that, and did agree with much of your own posts, there are loads of profiles without any male pics at all - we just ask for one!"
So do we, but much prefer to receive face pics and body pics of both potential new friends via private email.
It gives a warm fuzzy feeling about the pics being genuine and because they are not on public view it helps cement the feeling that the couple are as discrete about this as we are |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Each to his/her own, personally i prefer to see a picture of the person im chatting to, i dont meet till im comfortable with them anyway. Ive a face picture of me as private, once ive got to know them, then i attach it to a message. Ive no interest in meeting someone without knowing what they look like - if necessary, i will give them my email addy but i hadnt thought that some might be so sneaky as to put out of date pictures and think im coming round to the idea that tho im not interested in a webcam, i should get one for safety reasons. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"great photo above hope you get down the chimmney
We have it over our fire place.........................
Not aimed at you but at A N other stood near a chimney, never be rude about you miss "
Thank you kind sir .... see I knew it wasn't true what they all say about you wishy |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ickmealloverWoman
over a year ago
a very plush appartment off junt 7 M5 |
"men on here have to learn that if you dont see what your getting, you usually dont get nowt in return x
Women have to learn to sssshhhhh.!!!!!...its still a mans world..... "
oooo I'll get you for that when I see you at chams next x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"men on here have to learn that if you dont see what your getting, you usually dont get nowt in return x
Women have to learn to sssshhhhh.!!!!!...its still a mans world.....
oooo I'll get you for that when I see you at chams next x"
He does have a point tho |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"this may have been mentioned before but as im faily new here im wondering why have so few profiles actually have pics of the man. I mean if you expect to swing with someone surely a body pic at least. Even peoples friends gallery there is no male pics. Now if me and my good lady want to meet someone we need to get an idea of what kind of physique the man and woman has but as there is no male pics it makes you think the guy has got nothing going for him.
Do people actually meet without seeing any pics of the men ?
If we were to play with couples then we would expect to see both of the couple before a meet, not on pics but just to show their face on a cam...and we would do the same.
As we only look for straight MFM, the single men who want to play don't really care what the male half looks like as they are not playing with him, although we do still show both our faces on cam.
I agree with you about the cam. We have face pics of us both in our private gallery but I'm not going to send them to just anyone who asks. A webcam is a better option I think ... you can please some of the people some of the time, but not all of the people all of the time "
You can say that again |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ickmealloverWoman
over a year ago
a very plush appartment off junt 7 M5 |
"men on here have to learn that if you dont see what your getting, you usually dont get nowt in return x
Women have to learn to sssshhhhh.!!!!!...its still a mans world.....
oooo I'll get you for that when I see you at chams next x
He does have a point tho "
that'll be my fingernail up his arse x x x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Because i cant be false if i tried just get the giggles can't even flirt lol just go bright red and blush lol. What if i put a picture of a skinny bird on here and i turned up fabulous bbw lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"men on here have to learn that if you dont see what your getting, you usually dont get nowt in return x
Women have to learn to sssshhhhh.!!!!!...its still a mans world.....
oooo I'll get you for that when I see you at chams next x
He does have a point tho
that'll be my fingernail up his arse x x x"
I would pay good maney to see that |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ickmealloverWoman
over a year ago
a very plush appartment off junt 7 M5 |
"men on here have to learn that if you dont see what your getting, you usually dont get nowt in return x
Women have to learn to sssshhhhh.!!!!!...its still a mans world.....
oooo I'll get you for that when I see you at chams next x
He does have a point tho
that'll be my fingernail up his arse x x x
I would pay good maney to see that "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"men on here have to learn that if you dont see what your getting, you usually dont get nowt in return x
Women have to learn to sssshhhhh.!!!!!...its still a mans world.....
oooo I'll get you for that when I see you at chams next x
He does have a point tho
that'll be my fingernail up his arse x x x
I would pay good maney to see that
"
she bloody wishes.... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Because i cant be false if i tried just get the giggles can't even flirt lol just go bright red and blush lol. What if i put a picture of a skinny bird on here and i turned up fabulous bbw lol"
You would not be the first or the last to do that. Our profile is the real deal BUT the only people who can vouch for that are folk we have met and unless you have met them as well then no amount of verification is going to change that.
Anyone can put any picture they want on their profile and it would prove absolutely jack shit.
Here's a thought move your mouse over your profile pic, right click and select save as and voilà'
Now if I do that I could happily save your pic and create a false profile on here or even more sinister if I lived in your town I could print it out and potentially create merry hell for you.
Lots of folk on here are way too blasé' about their face pics and I doubt most are even aware of the risks they are taking |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Can never for the life of us understand why anyone would put up pics that weren't them or true representations of themselves.
Surely if they're genuine about meeting they would soon be "outed" when they met up with someone.
Everyone we've ever met has looked like their pics mostly even better.
As for having no qualms about showing face pics on profile,we can't see how our personal openness means we are indiscreet about those we meet.
Just can't grasp that one!
XXXX |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Can never for the life of us understand why anyone would put up pics that weren't them or true representations of themselves.
Surely if they're genuine about meeting they would soon be "outed" when they met up with someone.
Everyone we've ever met has looked like their pics mostly even better.
As for having no qualms about showing face pics on profile,we can't see how our personal openness means we are indiscreet about those we meet.
Just can't grasp that one!
XXXX"
Not wishing to be rude but all you have to grasp is the notion that not everyone who puts up face pics will be as discrete as you.
As you guys well know this subject has been debated on several occasions on here and quite a few folk have stated categorically that they do not give a flying f..k who knows what they get up to.
Sad we know, but we use that as our yardstick and rather than take even the smallest of chances we do not meet folk who post face pics. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Some don't have profile pics but attach them with emais. Whats wrong with that."
Absolutely nothing, it's how they choose to conduct this business and is not for us to question, something I have been saying right through this thread |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
As for having no qualms about showing face pics on profile,we can't see how our personal openness means we are indiscreet about those we meet.
Just can't grasp that one!
XXXX"
We totally agree with you there, we would rather be open than paranoid.
merriam-webster.com - paranoia
1 : a psychosis characterized by systematized delusions of persecution or grandeur usually without hallucinations
2 : a tendency on the part of an individual or group toward excessive or irrational suspiciousness and distrustfulness of others
We think definition number 2 may be more applicable. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
As for having no qualms about showing face pics on profile,we can't see how our personal openness means we are indiscreet about those we meet.
Just can't grasp that one!
XXXX
We totally agree with you there, we would rather be open than paranoid.
merriam-webster.com - paranoia
1 : a psychosis characterized by systematized delusions of persecution or grandeur usually without hallucinations
2 : a tendency on the part of an individual or group toward excessive or irrational suspiciousness and distrustfulness of others
We think definition number 2 may be more applicable."
That's a great publication but not wanting to get into a silly game of verb tennis we decline to reply in kind.
Whenever this subject is raised the argument becomes almost instantly polarised. The cry is almost always the same, it's fear, paranoia or even shame on the part of what appears to be the majority of swingers who follow the no face pic creed.
We have been playing for almost 10 years now and have only meet one couple, via any of these sites, who are not of the same mindset as us. That couple were our first ever playmates who were fantastic but way more hard core than we had initially realised.
If we were small minded enough we might offer up a whole host of adjectives to
describe our viewpoint on this matter but we don't because as we said right at the start of this thread
"What people put on their profile in the way of written description and pictures is their own personal choice and so long as they are happy with what they have achieved none of us has the right to question them for it.
If we see a profile that lacks what is required to spark an interest in us we simply move on."
The only thing I would change from that initial statement is to change "right to question" to "right to judge".
We have never judged anyone on how they go about their swinging lives, each to their own is how we do business. But we have made some very distinct choices about who we would potentially like to involve in our swinging lives and I suspect voicing that in here is what has irked you most.
Looking back on the advice I gave earlier about right clicking on your profile pic, thats how easy it is for pics to fall into the wrong hands.
Those who publicly post face will always fall somewhere in between the innocents who have no real idea how easy they have made it for their lifestyle to come out through to those who would happily stand up at the next family gathering and blather on about who they have met and the clubs etc they have visited.
It's a broad spectrum we know and we have absolutely no idea where you sit within it, and as such we, like countless others choose not to meet with people who post face pics in the public domain.
In fact I really am not sure just how much you realise you are revealing to almost anyone who has access to this site but if you have ever chatted to Duncan about Charco then you are seriously hanging it all out there, which really does make our point
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
The thing that irked us was your tenuous link between having face pictures on a profile and not being able to be discreet with regards to other people’s privacy. You said that you never judge anyone and yet you are effectively judge everyone with face pictures as untrustworthy people who do not know how to keep things private. You now seem to be implying that having face pictures on your profile automatically makes you "hardcore" whatever that is?
As for the paranoia post, we have not said that people who chose not to post face pictures are in any way paranoid, but refusing to meet those that do, does take things a little further along that path.
Your 'fall somewhere between' criteria categorises face picture posters somewhere between naive and obnoxious loudmouths. As for sitting somewhere with in that range then we would have to say nowhere as we are aware of what we are doing and don’t 'blather on' where other peoples privacy is concerned.
Where privacy is concerned, we only publish pictures and text on open parts of the internet that we do not mind anyone seeing or reading and that includes the pictures of us on naturist holidays and posts to newsgroups. (Charco is a nice place, try it out sometime.)
The information you found is out there on the public domain because we chose to put it there. The method you use to find information certainly does not involve pasting a face picture into Google search, so it has to come from the textual content of a profile. Publicly posting text is exponentially more likely to cause an exposure of a lifestyle than that of a face picture.
We are regular visitors to Chameleons in Newport so if you see us there (you know what we look like) come over for a chat (promise we wont tell anyone else).
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Jeff,
By simply using something that is supposed to be "your friend", I used neither text from your profile nor your picture, however in a matter of about 3 clicks I had access to your website with all that is in there
You may well give not a jot about that and we have not judged you or anyone else for doing so.
All we have said and I will reiterate is that those folk who post facial pictures MAY, and I stress MAY lack the level of discretion that we seek in those we play with.
If I can find out that much about you in less than 3 clicks what on earth would lead either of us here to believe you would be able to, or even wish to keep our identity a secret
It not a personal thing, it really isnt and please dont see it that way, it's simply a privacy issue, none of our family or friends or acquaintances know of this side of our lives and thats precisely how we intend keeping it.
Only been to Chams in Newport once but if we do go again we will defo look out for you guys, drinks are on us. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What people put on their profile in the way of written description and pictures is their own personal choice and so long as they are happy with what they have achieved none of us has the right to question them for it.
If we see a profile that lacks what is required to spark an interest in us we simply move on.
PC twaddle!!!
So what if it is their choice??? So what if it works for them??? We DO have a right to question because we all have the right of free speech, as far as it goes.
Sex on the beach have asked a legitimate question and it is one that despite being in the "scene" for about 11 years, we still don't understand, why there are no pics of the male! People hide behind "personal choice" because it is easy to not have to comply with the basics that we would certainly expect!
This is a statement to comply with some peoples PC ethos...
Although I disagree with the content of your post, I can see that it is your opinion and I accept that as your right to hold, however I may or may not agree or disagree with other statements on this or any other post and reserve the right to post my agreement/disagreement as I choose. This is in no way the view of both of us in this household and Mrs Rumour reserves the right to agree or disagree with either Mr Rumour (me) or any other poster.
PC Twaddle oh how that made me chuckle, politeness is now PC.....
I am going to pick one word from your whole post which pretty much sums up the gulf in the difference in thought process we have. It comes at the end of your second paragraph and its EXPECT!
We EXPECT absolutely nothing from any one person or couple on this site, we HOPE for quite a few things but we EXPECT nothing.
We fully ACCEPT that it is the right of each and everyone who joins this site to put exactly what they are comfortable with on their profile and long may that continue.
Because we feel that way we would never question profile content and simply use our own judgement when looking for potential friends. If a profile lacks what we like we move on, it really is that simple folks.
As an aside, and because of our total commitment toward discretion, with regards to this side of our lives we steer completely clear of profiles with faces in the public viewing area.
For us, and we stress FOR US, anyone happy enough to publicly declare in that manner is a risk simply not worth taking.
However because it is the individual right of each and every member to put exactly what they want on their profile we don't question it, we simply choose to ignore it "
...you cant say fairer than that! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Well, we don't mind putting face pics on the site. We do find it hard to reply to messages that ask "are you interested in us?" when there are NO photos at all on their profile.
Nix does get peeved when all photos are of the female with no idea of what the the male looks like.(or at best a "cock shot") Surely, there has to be some attraction?
Of course, we still don't have smellovision! It's amazing how many people don't feel the need to even shower before a meet! Don't think we'll ever get that as an option. LOL |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
