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Death of my assistance dog.
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On Tuesday my assistance dog became very unwell in the space of a few hours. He was up to date with all his jabs and we have used the same vet since we started working together. Due to him turning so unwell so very quickly and the state I was in the vet said if it was her dog she would put him to sleep as opposed to going through surgery with the likelihood of him passing under general Anesthesia and that she didn't want to call me and tell me over the phone. So instead he passed in my arms. He is having a private cremation and I've chosen the urn that I would like him in. He changed my life beyond measure. It was the privilege of a lifetime and the greatest honour in the world to be his handler. I am just so lost and devastated on a level I didn't think was possible, it hurts even more than the passing of my mother in 2012.
I was wondering if anyone has any thoughts or things that may help throughout this horrid time.  |
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Time will heal.
Remember you gave him a wonderful life of love, and no doubt lots of tasty food! You played your part too.
Personally I would go again! You’re not taking away his memory by giving your life over to another. There’ll be another one sat in the rescue centre waiting just for you.
My condolences anyway friend. |
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By (user no longer on site) 45 weeks ago
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It's so very sad to hear this. I'm a complete wuss when it comes to animals more than people. the passing, I feel, will stay with you the same, but sometimes with certain people the loss can be felt more with a loyal animal.
Can you take comfort that you held and made sure the last moments were full of love for him.
Sending tears, full of luv for you in this time OP X |
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I'd wish you a magic cure but there isn't one. He was a major presence in your life so its not surprising that has broken your heart. All you can do is wait it out. I lost my 18 tear old cat abs it hurt like a bugger. It still pangs me when i see pictures of him.
So grieve. It will pass. Take walks and let nature heal you. Listen to music. Allow family and friends to support you. Hug them often. And ball your eyes out. You were gifted a wonderful companion but we dont get them for long.
Well done for having the courage to be there for him at the end. Not all owners can do it but your lovely dog had you at the end. He went knowing he was loved. |
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By (user no longer on site) 45 weeks ago
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I'm sorry for your loss. It's such a difficult time and so many mixed emotions. If it helps at all and you feel you need to speak to someone I know the blue cross offer pet bereavement counselling! It's a free service. Take time to process what's happened . You've lost a friend in every sense of the word. X |
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I'm so glad you were able to be there the end. He will have passed knowing he was loved. We are all devastated when a pet passes but you also have the service aspect on top. Your dog must have been so very special and it's completely understandable that you are very upset right now.
J |
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Sorry to hear of your sad news about your dog/pet I know that feeling so well.nothing anyone says helps at the time.but with alittle time things get better honestly just take things one day at a time and try not too over think you did the right and only thing by the sound of things |
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I am so sorry to hear and this brought tears to my eyes. Understandably is a huge loss and vey painful for you. Sadly it is one day at a time dealing with your grief. I felt such a loss, and still do, when I lost mine. The memories will be there and think of the lovely time you had together and how much you did for each other. Sending love and hugs. |
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Search for poems about the Rainbow Bridge. When I lost my dogs someone mentioned this to me, I’d not heard of it before. They really do provide comfort.
Also please remember than your dog isn’t suffering anymore and sometimes the greatest show of love that we can give to our pets is to make that final, awful decision. |
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By (user no longer on site) 45 weeks ago
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Oh i am so sorry, losing a beloved pet/service animal is absolutely heart breaking, i can't imagine the pain you are in
When the weather is better i would recommend finding a nice spot in your garden, if you have one, where you can put a chair and place/plant something in remembrance, so you can sit peacefully with the sun on your face and birdsong around you
If you can find a plant /flower with your dogs name that may also bring some peace in future years
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By *ags73Man 45 weeks ago
glasgow-ish |
I’m sorry for your loss. They’re a constant in our lives and it’s so hard looking around and they’re not there.
But they’re free and happy across the rainbow bridge and I hope you’ll get another assistance dog. |
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I am so sorry to hear this OP that is absolutely heartbreaking and I’m send love your way
I don’t have advise as such but I am wishing you all the best during this tough time and I hope you can reflect on some amazing memories you both created together |
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The shock of it happening so unexpectedly has probably hit quite hard. Usually there's hard fought decisions on when is the best time to let them go, so you can at leat be thankful it happened quickly and pain was limited. Time does heal, hope you're still able to get out and that you find another soon |
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By (user no longer on site) 45 weeks ago
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Dogs really are just brilliant inventions aren’t they? If I’d invented the dog I’d agree to a short loan, but then I’d want it back. God probably thinks that way too. But the joy they bring is a lifetime’s worth crammed into less time.
I’m so sorry for your loss. But you are richer for having had your furry friend. |
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I'm so sorry, I'm welling up just reading all the comments as it bring back memories of losing our beloved dog just over year ago. The grief was overwhelming and I ending up going to the doctor's for some medication.
Her ashes are on our dresser next to our favourite picture of her and we still light a candle every night.
Time does heal and last summer we adopted a rescue dog from the RSPCA. He is loving, kind and wonderful company, he's lying next to me now. Take it easy and don't rush into any decisions, you have your memories and things will get better. Promise.
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Man, it sucks when you lose a pet, particularly a dog. And if he was for your assistance too it would make it worse.
I'm glad you got to see him in his final moments and it seemed painless. Take a lot of solace from that and know that in time you will heal and perhaps you will find someone else to walk alongside you. They will have different characters but similarities. Time will heal buddy. |
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"I'm so glad you were able to be there the end. He will have passed knowing he was loved. We are all devastated when a pet passes but you also have the service aspect on top. Your dog must have been so very special and it's completely understandable that you are very upset right now.
J"
I had to be there for him, it was the least that I could do. He is loved so very dearly. He was my first working dog and he changed my life beyond measure. I was blessed to work with him. He was special. He literally was a miracle from god. I have a cutting of his hair, it's in a little vial with a ribbon. I placed it Infront of the our lady of Fatima statue. |
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Letting him go was the ultimate act of love that you could of shown him
I am so sorry for your loss, be kind and allow yourself to grieve your best friend.
My dog is my World and I am dreading the day when his time comes.
I was heartbroken when my last dog passed, I never thought I could love another but I did. Time is a great healer, sounds cliché but it's true
Dogs are the best gift ever, they teach us so much about life, love and loss |
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It's a truly awful time when you lose a loyal pet, and the bond between can only be stronger when they are an assistance dog..
Give yourself time to grieve Op, the memories will always be there and good luck in getting back to how things where with them..  |
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Dear OP, what a desperately sad time for you. I am very sorry to hear of your loss and can sense your pain in your post.
I have no words of wisdom but endorse all the suggestions above. I guess all I can say is use your fab community. You turned to us to pour out your grief and, despite the fact we are all colossal perverts and constantly take the piss, we’re there for our friends whenever needed.
Keep talking and we’ll keep listening.
Sending man hugs |
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Thank you for all your kind replies. It doesn't still feel real. The friends I have fail to understand that my whole life has changed in terms of what I can do etc and going out. I've noticed I'm hyper vigilant at night and feel frightened since the loss. He was a miracle, truly. I've kept myself to myself recently as the pain has been too immense. My Dr called last week to discuss the requirements but I couldn't go through that just yet. I will be bringing my boy home tomorrow. He has been cremated privately so it's just his ashes that I will get and I've chosen a very nice urn for him. It sounds ridiculous but I'm looking forward to finally bringing him home. His name was Sebastian (I didn't name him, the charity that trains them named him). I have been in touch with the charity and the breeders and thanked them for the miracle that was Sebastian. They sent cards which was very lovely. |
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It's not ridiculous at all, I felt comforted that our dog was back home where she belonged.
However I would urge you to speak with people about the next steps, however difficult it is because clearly the ramifications of what happened goes beyond just grief for your loss. All the best. |
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"Thank you for all your kind replies. It doesn't still feel real. The friends I have fail to understand that my whole life has changed in terms of what I can do etc and going out. I've noticed I'm hyper vigilant at night and feel frightened since the loss. He was a miracle, truly. I've kept myself to myself recently as the pain has been too immense. My Dr called last week to discuss the requirements but I couldn't go through that just yet. I will be bringing my boy home tomorrow. He has been cremated privately so it's just his ashes that I will get and I've chosen a very nice urn for him. It sounds ridiculous but I'm looking forward to finally bringing him home. His name was Sebastian (I didn't name him, the charity that trains them named him). I have been in touch with the charity and the breeders and thanked them for the miracle that was Sebastian. They sent cards which was very lovely."
I hope that brings you peace and though you will not forget your beloved dog, I hope you find the way to move forward |
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By (user no longer on site) 44 weeks ago
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Get another dog it’s not an emotional replacement but over time it will be
My dog died suddenly last summer I still hurt like hell over it but my new pup is helping |
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By *avinaTVTV/TS 44 weeks ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
"Thank you for all your kind replies. It doesn't still feel real. The friends I have fail to understand that my whole life has changed in terms of what I can do etc and going out. I've noticed I'm hyper vigilant at night and feel frightened since the loss. He was a miracle, truly. I've kept myself to myself recently as the pain has been too immense. My Dr called last week to discuss the requirements but I couldn't go through that just yet. I will be bringing my boy home tomorrow. He has been cremated privately so it's just his ashes that I will get and I've chosen a very nice urn for him. It sounds ridiculous but I'm looking forward to finally bringing him home. His name was Sebastian (I didn't name him, the charity that trains them named him). I have been in touch with the charity and the breeders and thanked them for the miracle that was Sebastian. They sent cards which was very lovely."
What a sad and heartbreaking loss.
He's waiting for you at the Rainbow Bridge, I'm certain. All my love in your grief.  |
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By *nnCeeWoman 44 weeks ago
East of Eden, West of Hell |
Awwwww... so sorry.
Nothing I can say will make it any easier, sadly, but please know I'm sending hugs through the ether...
I'm sure he knew he was very well loved. Try and keep that in your heart and be kind to yourself xx |
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I hope I can get another AD I know nobody will ever replace him. He was my first working dog and changed my life beyond measure. I've sent the details to my team and hopefully in time I will have another AD. Life is just so different without him. It sounds silly but I do find comfort that he went home during the season of lent. |
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"I hope I can get another AD I know nobody will ever replace him. He was my first working dog and changed my life beyond measure. I've sent the details to my team and hopefully in time I will have another AD. Life is just so different without him. It sounds silly but I do find comfort that he went home during the season of lent. "
Nothing's silly at a time like this.
You're right nothing will replace Sebastian but there's always room to love his successor  |
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I just thought I would let you guys know that God granted me another miracle. The charity and my physicians worked very hard to source a new AD for me as they were very worried I would go downhill (which i was) I met him and he was a joy so I decided that I could work with him. He's been home for a week now and is fantastic. All basic commands are followed through. Plus he loves to help with the laundry; he will pop things in and out of the machine. He starts formal training tomorrow but he is a gem. He is one year old so, God willing, I will have at least a decade of working with him. I just want to thank you all for your comments and advice. |
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"I just thought I would let you guys know that God granted me another miracle. The charity and my physicians worked very hard to source a new AD for me as they were very worried I would go downhill (which i was) I met him and he was a joy so I decided that I could work with him. He's been home for a week now and is fantastic. All basic commands are followed through. Plus he loves to help with the laundry; he will pop things in and out of the machine. He starts formal training tomorrow but he is a gem. He is one year old so, God willing, I will have at least a decade of working with him. I just want to thank you all for your comments and advice. "
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"I just thought I would let you guys know that God granted me another miracle. The charity and my physicians worked very hard to source a new AD for me as they were very worried I would go downhill (which i was) I met him and he was a joy so I decided that I could work with him. He's been home for a week now and is fantastic. All basic commands are followed through. Plus he loves to help with the laundry; he will pop things in and out of the machine. He starts formal training tomorrow but he is a gem. He is one year old so, God willing, I will have at least a decade of working with him. I just want to thank you all for your comments and advice. "
I can't this enough, what fantastic news. |
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By *ularliWoman 35 weeks ago
Worcester |
"I just thought I would let you guys know that God granted me another miracle. The charity and my physicians worked very hard to source a new AD for me as they were very worried I would go downhill (which i was) I met him and he was a joy so I decided that I could work with him. He's been home for a week now and is fantastic. All basic commands are followed through. Plus he loves to help with the laundry; he will pop things in and out of the machine. He starts formal training tomorrow but he is a gem. He is one year old so, God willing, I will have at least a decade of working with him. I just want to thank you all for your comments and advice. "
OP, I’ve cried while reading your posts.
I’ve lost dogs over the years and it’s been awful but to lose a service dog must be even harder. They are such wonderful gifts.
I’m so glad that you have now got a new one and it’s going well.
I wish my dogs would help with the laundry
Your new bundle of fun will help heal those wounds and will start creating new memories.
X |
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"I just thought I would let you guys know that God granted me another miracle. The charity and my physicians worked very hard to source a new AD for me as they were very worried I would go downhill (which i was) I met him and he was a joy so I decided that I could work with him. He's been home for a week now and is fantastic. All basic commands are followed through. Plus he loves to help with the laundry; he will pop things in and out of the machine. He starts formal training tomorrow but he is a gem. He is one year old so, God willing, I will have at least a decade of working with him. I just want to thank you all for your comments and advice. "
its so lovely to hear that you have a new AD and friend in your life. Hopefully he will bring much joy to your life - and do you think you can send him round to do my laundry too |
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"I just thought I would let you guys know that God granted me another miracle. The charity and my physicians worked very hard to source a new AD for me as they were very worried I would go downhill (which i was) I met him and he was a joy so I decided that I could work with him. He's been home for a week now and is fantastic. All basic commands are followed through. Plus he loves to help with the laundry; he will pop things in and out of the machine. He starts formal training tomorrow but he is a gem. He is one year old so, God willing, I will have at least a decade of working with him. I just want to thank you all for your comments and advice. "
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By *essiCouple 35 weeks ago
suffolk |
"I just thought I would let you guys know that God granted me another miracle. The charity and my physicians worked very hard to source a new AD for me as they were very worried I would go downhill (which i was) I met him and he was a joy so I decided that I could work with him. He's been home for a week now and is fantastic. All basic commands are followed through. Plus he loves to help with the laundry; he will pop things in and out of the machine. He starts formal training tomorrow but he is a gem. He is one year old so, God willing, I will have at least a decade of working with him. I just want to thank you all for your comments and advice.
("
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"I just thought I would let you guys know that God granted me another miracle. The charity and my physicians worked very hard to source a new AD for me as they were very worried I would go downhill (which i was) I met him and he was a joy so I decided that I could work with him. He's been home for a week now and is fantastic. All basic commands are followed through. Plus he loves to help with the laundry; he will pop things in and out of the machine. He starts formal training tomorrow but he is a gem. He is one year old so, God willing, I will have at least a decade of working with him. I just want to thank you all for your comments and advice. "
That's really good to hear.. |
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