FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > A Proposal for Enriching Our Forum Discussions
A Proposal for Enriching Our Forum Discussions
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Hey everyone,
I hope this message finds you well. I've been a part of our vibrant community for a while now, and I've got to say, I love the energy and the unique perspectives we all bring to the table. However, I've noticed something that's been on my mind, and I hope it's okay to share it here.
Sometimes, when I scroll through the forum, it feels like we're dancing to the same tune—discussing similar topics over and over. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for sharing and exploring, but I think we might be missing out on some golden opportunities to dive deeper and learn more from each other.
I get it, we're all here to swing and have a good time, and I'm not trying to rain on anyone's parade. But wouldn't it be cool if we mixed it up a bit more? Maybe we could introduce a little bit of gentle guidance on what we post. Nothing too strict, just a nudge to keep things fresh and encourage more of those juicy, thought-provoking chats that we all love when they happen.
What do you think? Could a sprinkle of moderation add some extra spice to our conversations and help us connect on even more levels? I'd love to hear your thoughts and keep making this space one of the best parts of our day. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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I took a break from fab and on my return it was like I’d just logged off. The forums …exactly the same topics over n over. So if you have fresh ideas OP crack on the forums need them. |
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It is moderated already by contributers.
People only post on threads that interest them and ignore the ones that don't.
Those who post on every thread won't care really.
Telling people what they can and can't post isn't very inclusive and will just put people off using the forums completely while reinforcing the belief that certain fabbers rule the roost and dictate what goes on.
If a thread isn't to your liking it's very easy to avoid it.
It's all subjective and what some people find interesting could be a steaming pile of self indulgent shite to others. |
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By *stellaWoman 40 weeks ago
London |
"I personally would love it if someone else talked about race. I’m getting a bit of a reputation!!
I don't feel I'm qualified to
Yeah, I was just thinking this. "
But maybe that’s it. As allies we should be doing some labour….? |
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"I personally would love it if someone else talked about race. I’m getting a bit of a reputation!!
I don't feel I'm qualified to
Yeah, I was just thinking this.
But maybe that’s it. As allies we should be doing some labour….?"
I feel that I'm stepping through a minefield with a blindfold on though.
|
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"It is moderated already by contributers.
People only post on threads that interest them and ignore the ones that don't.
Those who post on every thread won't care really.
Telling people what they can and can't post isn't very inclusive and will just put people off using the forums completely while reinforcing the belief that certain fabbers rule the roost and dictate what goes on.
If a thread isn't to your liking it's very easy to avoid it.
It's all subjective and what some people find interesting could be a steaming pile of self indulgent shite to others."
I tend to agree.
|
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"Hey everyone,
I hope this message finds you well. I've been a part of our vibrant community for a while now, and I've got to say, I love the energy and the unique perspectives we all bring to the table. However, I've noticed something that's been on my mind, and I hope it's okay to share it here.
Sometimes, when I scroll through the forum, it feels like we're dancing to the same tune—discussing similar topics over and over. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for sharing and exploring, but I think we might be missing out on some golden opportunities to dive deeper and learn more from each other.
I get it, we're all here to swing and have a good time, and I'm not trying to rain on anyone's parade. But wouldn't it be cool if we mixed it up a bit more? Maybe we could introduce a little bit of gentle guidance on what we post. Nothing too strict, just a nudge to keep things fresh and encourage more of those juicy, thought-provoking chats that we all love when they happen.
What do you think? Could a sprinkle of moderation add some extra spice to our conversations and help us connect on even more levels? I'd love to hear your thoughts and keep making this space one of the best parts of our day."
As you probably know the fora are moderated  but I guess you mean that unspecified individuals steer discussion or choose topics according to what they feel is interesting, worthy or suitable in order for extra spice and deeper connection.
Anyone can contribute within the rules and personally I like it that way. if people want to talk about different subjects they can, the direction they take will be decided by the individuals who respond. I honestly believe that if people craved what you suggest it would already be happening. |
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By *bi HaiveMan 40 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
I like it how it is.
People can post what they want, when they want, skip what they want, take a break, ask the same question because they're new and may not have seen it asked before, talk total bollocks, make jokes, have fun, and generally dip in and out whenever.
The more you try and control forums the more you stifle chat.
If people want to 'delve deeper' with someone can't they just PM?
To me the forums aren't about meeting, going into graphic detail about anything unless you choose and whilst they provide a good insight into people's personalities, they're an escape from the other side of swinging - actually meeting and doing the sex.
It's a place to chill, take a break from life and waste time. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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"Build it and they will come
Things to make people come is a recurring theme.
In! Whatcha building? 
Blanket fort. Just need a good name for it. "
The Fab fortitude of debauchery. |
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The self appointed forum police and people’s desire to not stick their head out of the trenches, in case they miss out on a potential shag, kind of put the kybosh on this place being too interesting |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"Build it and they will come
Things to make people come is a recurring theme.
In! Whatcha building?
Blanket fort. Just need a good name for it.
The Fab fortitude of debauchery. "
I so want to talk to people in a bad faux French accent now. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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I've been on another site with very heavy moderation. The first three topics I suggested were nixed as they'd been covered before. The comment moderation and telling off if one said something viewed to not be inclusive enough was ridiculous. I quickly tired of it and left.
I think a simple limit on the number of threads a person can start in 24 hours would make a difference. Being able to have pinned posts in forums would also help. I'm not keen on anything else and accept that the forums are often circular and repetitive. It's part of their charm. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"Build it and they will come
Things to make people come is a recurring theme.
In! Whatcha building?
Blanket fort. Just need a good name for it.
The Fab fortitude of debauchery.
I so want to talk to people in a bad faux French accent now. "
Oui |
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By *aizyWoman 40 weeks ago
west midlands |
"I've been on another site with very heavy moderation. The first three topics I suggested were nixed as they'd been covered before. The comment moderation and telling off if one said something viewed to not be inclusive enough was ridiculous. I quickly tired of it and left.
I think a simple limit on the number of threads a person can start in 24 hours would make a difference. Being able to have pinned posts in forums would also help. I'm not keen on anything else and accept that the forums are often circular and repetitive. It's part of their charm. "
No, I wouldn't like the heavy moderation like you describe, I wouldn't stick around for long either.
I like the forums, some topics are a bit samey but overall I enjoy the forums for what they are, I like reading peoples comments, especially when a thread goes off tangent. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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"Tldr. "
Posts are too repetitive in topics. Let’s make it a forum with rules where you can’t post same shit that’s been posted ten million other times because that will make it a more lovely forum. |
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"I've been on another site with very heavy moderation. The first three topics I suggested were nixed as they'd been covered before. The comment moderation and telling off if one said something viewed to not be inclusive enough was ridiculous. I quickly tired of it and left.
I think a simple limit on the number of threads a person can start in 24 hours would make a difference. Being able to have pinned posts in forums would also help. I'm not keen on anything else and accept that the forums are often circular and repetitive. It's part of their charm.
No, I wouldn't like the heavy moderation like you describe, I wouldn't stick around for long either.
I like the forums, some topics are a bit samey but overall I enjoy the forums for what they are, I like reading peoples comments, especially when a thread goes off tangent."
Noticed |
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How about we nominate forum reps?
Before anyone can post they have to send their contributions to the reps for amendments or redactions?
They will then issue a Memorandum of Understanding (MOU) allowing the poster to continue.
If the reps are unable to confirm they can run it upstairs to a forum committee for approval or dismissal.
|
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"Build it and they will come
Things to make people come is a recurring theme.
In! Whatcha building?
Blanket fort. Just need a good name for it.
Home of the Terminally Bewildered?"
Not very ‘forty’ though is it? |
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Really why would you want these restrictions read the tgreads that gra you, ignore the rest. Others obviously like them and comment. I do a what's for tea/dinner almost every day. Would you like me not to? Will that make you happy. How many a month shouls I do? Am I allowed an extra one or two during xmas. There are plenty of threads, many reoetitive ones I will never engage with. I would not dream of telling anyone that they shoukd not be posting the same stuff. Goodness me |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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"How about we nominate forum reps?
Before anyone can post they have to send their contributions to the reps for amendments or redactions?
They will then issue a Memorandum of Understanding (MOU) allowing the poster to continue.
If the reps are unable to confirm they can run it upstairs to a forum committee for approval or dismissal.
"
Enjoying yourself?  |
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A forum is a naturally Darwinian environment and most attempts to steer the culture or topics outside of top down mod enforced rules are doomed to sink into forum oblivion.
Ultimately, be the change you want to see. It might work and is always worth a try.
I once made dick pics very popular for a whole two days in the Irish thread by running a competition. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"I personally would love it if someone else talked about race. I’m getting a bit of a reputation!!
I don't feel I'm qualified to
Yeah, I was just thinking this.
But maybe that’s it. As allies we should be doing some labour….?
I feel that I'm stepping through a minefield with a blindfold on though.
"
I get you. I was only joking though. I don’t mind being the one that talks about race so much  |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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"I personally would love it if someone else talked about race. I’m getting a bit of a reputation!!
Do you ever talk about race? I can't say I've noticed."
Rarely tbf |
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Maybe the topics could be repetitive, but the answers are never the same. I do enjoy the British irony here.
I have been stood up three times. I would like to talk about the reasons people do that. I got the opportunity to talk with one of them, some
weeks later. The reasons were just unbelievable. It was heartbreaking, but I do not think it's just because of people is simply mean. So many people lie about age, status, physics, and sexual preferences pretending to be another person. Then, they can't face it
It's an interesting topic for me |
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"Hey everyone,
I hope this message finds you well. I've been a part of our vibrant community for a while now, and I've got to say, I love the energy and the unique perspectives we all bring to the table. However, I've noticed something that's been on my mind, and I hope it's okay to share it here.
Sometimes, when I scroll through the forum, it feels like we're dancing to the same tune—discussing similar topics over and over. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for sharing and exploring, but I think we might be missing out on some golden opportunities to dive deeper and learn more from each other.
I get it, we're all here to swing and have a good time, and I'm not trying to rain on anyone's parade. But wouldn't it be cool if we mixed it up a bit more? Maybe we could introduce a little bit of gentle guidance on what we post. Nothing too strict, just a nudge to keep things fresh and encourage more of those juicy, thought-provoking chats that we all love when they happen.
What do you think? Could a sprinkle of moderation add some extra spice to our conversations and help us connect on even more levels? I'd love to hear your thoughts and keep making this space one of the best parts of our day."
ahhhhh see you've noticed it gets a little repetitive and you want more diversity unfortunately we've talked about everything at least once if not a hundred times, i bring originality but I'm the only one |
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By *oxy jWoman 40 weeks ago
somerset |
leave it alone ...its a tiny tiny part of fab anyway most dont use it at all ... its a great way to filter people to with how they think or act ...
most of the post nowdays are guys looking for wank material just pure junk post but thasts what the forum is a place for all not the few ..
|
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"" Juicy and Thought Provoking " usually just end up in arguments as people think they are never wrong !!
So no , give me more silly fun topics please.
Just my opinion obvs  "
A little nugget of wisdom right there  |
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"" Juicy and Thought Provoking " usually just end up in arguments as people think they are never wrong !!
So no , give me more silly fun topics please.
Just my opinion obvs
A little nugget of wisdom right there "
I'm here all day |
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"
Sometimes, when I scroll through the forum, it feels like we're dancing to the same tune—discussing similar topics over and over. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for sharing and exploring, but I think we might be missing out on some golden opportunities to dive deeper and learn more from each other.
"
If I understand correctly you are saying instead of asking ‘is it piss’ we should be discussing what is piss? or even what the meaning of life ?
Do you think we are ready for that ? |
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By *aizyWoman 40 weeks ago
west midlands |
"I've been on another site with very heavy moderation. The first three topics I suggested were nixed as they'd been covered before. The comment moderation and telling off if one said something viewed to not be inclusive enough was ridiculous. I quickly tired of it and left.
I think a simple limit on the number of threads a person can start in 24 hours would make a difference. Being able to have pinned posts in forums would also help. I'm not keen on anything else and accept that the forums are often circular and repetitive. It's part of their charm.
No, I wouldn't like the heavy moderation like you describe, I wouldn't stick around for long either.
I like the forums, some topics are a bit samey but overall I enjoy the forums for what they are, I like reading peoples comments, especially when a thread goes off tangent.
Noticed "
I was thinking of you!!  |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"
Sometimes, when I scroll through the forum, it feels like we're dancing to the same tune—discussing similar topics over and over. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for sharing and exploring, but I think we might be missing out on some golden opportunities to dive deeper and learn more from each other.
If I understand correctly you are saying instead of asking ‘is it piss’ we should be discussing what is piss? or even what the meaning of life ?
Do you think we are ready for that ?"
Or ‘why is piss?’ … |
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"
Sometimes, when I scroll through the forum, it feels like we're dancing to the same tune—discussing similar topics over and over. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for sharing and exploring, but I think we might be missing out on some golden opportunities to dive deeper and learn more from each other.
If I understand correctly you are saying instead of asking ‘is it piss’ we should be discussing what is piss? or even what the meaning of life ?
Do you think we are ready for that ?
Or ‘why is piss?’ … "
That’s even deeper than Fabs favourite filosophical….. ‘how are you?’ |
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"I've been on another site with very heavy moderation. The first three topics I suggested were nixed as they'd been covered before. The comment moderation and telling off if one said something viewed to not be inclusive enough was ridiculous. I quickly tired of it and left.
I think a simple limit on the number of threads a person can start in 24 hours would make a difference. Being able to have pinned posts in forums would also help. I'm not keen on anything else and accept that the forums are often circular and repetitive. It's part of their charm. "
Yes, I think this last idea would help. It wouks make people think more before posting and trivial thought that crosses their mind. And again, pinned posts would be good. |
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"I've been on another site with very heavy moderation. The first three topics I suggested were nixed as they'd been covered before. The comment moderation and telling off if one said something viewed to not be inclusive enough was ridiculous. I quickly tired of it and left.
I think a simple limit on the number of threads a person can start in 24 hours would make a difference. Being able to have pinned posts in forums would also help. I'm not keen on anything else and accept that the forums are often circular and repetitive. It's part of their charm.
No, I wouldn't like the heavy moderation like you describe, I wouldn't stick around for long either.
I like the forums, some topics are a bit samey but overall I enjoy the forums for what they are, I like reading peoples comments, especially when a thread goes off tangent.
Noticed
I was thinking of you!! "
Ditto |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"
Sometimes, when I scroll through the forum, it feels like we're dancing to the same tune—discussing similar topics over and over. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for sharing and exploring, but I think we might be missing out on some golden opportunities to dive deeper and learn more from each other.
If I understand correctly you are saying instead of asking ‘is it piss’ we should be discussing what is piss? or even what the meaning of life ?
Do you think we are ready for that ?
Or ‘why is piss?’ …
That’s even deeper than Fabs favourite filosophical….. ‘how are you?’"
I always like it deeper … |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"Well I thought the thread on what I should name my hypothetical garden gnome was enlightening 
What name did you settle on btw??
Tiny or Rocky.
I'm going to have to get one now "
Please do! |
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"
Sometimes, when I scroll through the forum, it feels like we're dancing to the same tune—discussing similar topics over and over. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for sharing and exploring, but I think we might be missing out on some golden opportunities to dive deeper and learn more from each other.
If I understand correctly you are saying instead of asking ‘is it piss’ we should be discussing what is piss? or even what the meaning of life ?
Do you think we are ready for that ?"
No, it should be oh my god I just love the feeling of piss trickling down my body. The smell, the warmth, the tickly sensations blah blah blah.
Deep thought, man. |
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By *eliWoman 40 weeks ago
. |
"I'm getting the impression you want more sexual conversations.
Am I right?
"
OP, I sort of understand where you're coming from. The repetitive nature of forum topics will always exhaust.
Do you know what's quite an easy implemented thing? Being the change you'd like to see.
Say you'd like to see more inclusivity on the fora. Start being more inclusive. Treating people as you'd like to see.
If you'd like to see more diversity in topics? Post new topics.
Sometimes it feels like people expect the forums to entertain them whilst not putting in the effort to get their desired outcome from it. Forum users aren't, the last time I checked anyway, performing monkeys. If you want to see a difference, why not start a little bit closer to home? Take accountability of your posts, your contributions, your input.
You'll have a happier experience.
Probably. |
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"I personally would love it if someone else talked about race. I’m getting a bit of a reputation!!
Do you ever talk about race? I can't say I've noticed.
Rarely tbf"
So far, it looks rather like the only Caucasian respondents don't see it as their problem! |
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"I'm getting the impression you want more sexual conversations.
Am I right?
OP, I sort of understand where you're coming from. The repetitive nature of forum topics will always exhaust.
Do you know what's quite an easy implemented thing? Being the change you'd like to see.
Say you'd like to see more inclusivity on the fora. Start being more inclusive. Treating people as you'd like to see.
If you'd like to see more diversity in topics? Post new topics.
Sometimes it feels like people expect the forums to entertain them whilst not putting in the effort to get their desired outcome from it. Forum users aren't, the last time I checked anyway, performing monkeys. If you want to see a difference, why not start a little bit closer to home? Take accountability of your posts, your contributions, your input.
You'll have a happier experience.
Probably. "
So basically what I said, Melissa?
Build it and they will come |
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When you've been here years you've seen it all and conversed about it all.
If the people are around who like to deep dive into serious conversations they tend to chat to each other and ignore the rest; if it doesn't turn into a flirt-fest.
I think most people come here for respite from work and life, and aren't inspired to write anything too deep and meaningful.
Personally, I hate typing on my phone as I make lots of mistakes I have to rectify, which means more hand pain.
I've said enough for the day.
|
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"I personally would love it if someone else talked about race. I’m getting a bit of a reputation!!
I don't feel I'm qualified to
Yeah, I was just thinking this.
But maybe that’s it. As allies we should be doing some labour….?
I feel that I'm stepping through a minefield with a blindfold on though.
I get you. I was only joking though. I don’t mind being the one that talks about race so much "
Serious question if I was to talk about race do you think my opinions would be taken seriously? |
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"When you've been here years you've seen it all and conversed about it all.
If the people are around who like to deep dive into serious conversations they tend to chat to each other and ignore the rest; if it doesn't turn into a flirt-fest.
I think most people come here for respite from work and life, and aren't inspired to write anything too deep and meaningful.
Personally, I hate typing on my phone as I make lots of mistakes I have to rectify, which means more hand pain.
I've said enough for the day.
"
Well said |
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By *eliWoman 40 weeks ago
. |
"I'm getting the impression you want more sexual conversations.
Am I right?
OP, I sort of understand where you're coming from. The repetitive nature of forum topics will always exhaust.
Do you know what's quite an easy implemented thing? Being the change you'd like to see.
Say you'd like to see more inclusivity on the fora. Start being more inclusive. Treating people as you'd like to see.
If you'd like to see more diversity in topics? Post new topics.
Sometimes it feels like people expect the forums to entertain them whilst not putting in the effort to get their desired outcome from it. Forum users aren't, the last time I checked anyway, performing monkeys. If you want to see a difference, why not start a little bit closer to home? Take accountability of your posts, your contributions, your input.
You'll have a happier experience.
Probably.
So basically what I said, Melissa?
Build it and they will come "
Melissa! Feels like shade, love it. Confession time - didn't read your post, just read the Op, saw there were a lot of replies
and skipped to the last.
Oh wait. You said build it and they'll come? Yeah, sage. Will start using that when this type of thread appears again. |
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Geeting back to the original thrust, it would help if The Lounge was kept clear from all the topics which should be in Swingers Chat. All the stuff about size, foreskins, oral, anal, female orgasms etc.
Moving them obviously makes work for the moderators and one would hope that eventually everyone would understand why there are different forum areas.
Could be a while, though, before that happens. |
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OP: the forums ebb and flow. People come and people go and the forums change with that flow - especially if noisy people arrive or depart.
If you want different conversations then either throw them into the mix or wait for a new crop of forumites to show their hand. Either approach works. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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"Geeting back to the original thrust, it would help if The Lounge was kept clear from all the topics which should be in Swingers Chat. All the stuff about size, foreskins, oral, anal, female orgasms etc.
Moving them obviously makes work for the moderators and one would hope that eventually everyone would understand why there are different forum areas.
Could be a while, though, before that happens."
So we can’t talk about sex in the lounge? That’s what you would like?
Can we all start to ask about stuff we don’t want to read in the lounge? |
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"
...
So we can’t talk about sex in the lounge? That’s what you would like?
Can we all start to ask about stuff we don’t want to read in the lounge? "
'The Lounge: The lounge is for general chat and discussion.'
That's what it says up at the top!
Unfortunately, it doesn't say anything pertinent unders the whingers Chat banner. Perhaps it should.
All I am suggesting is that we talk about sexual subjects in the area already provided for them. Keep the Lounge clear for general interest topics which are not categorised elsewhere. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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"Geeting back to the original thrust, it would help if The Lounge was kept clear from all the topics which should be in Swingers Chat. All the stuff about size, foreskins, oral, anal, female orgasms etc.
Moving them obviously makes work for the moderators and one would hope that eventually everyone would understand why there are different forum areas.
Could be a while, though, before that happens.
So we can’t talk about sex in the lounge? That’s what you would like?
Can we all start to ask about stuff we don’t want to read in the lounge? "
I actually think that's a good idea. The moderator s volunteer but they do sign up to do that job so is it that hard to move threads into the more appropriate forum? They do it with games. Maybe a mod can answer that.
Maybe the lounge would have a variety of topics then, and people might post more instead of lurking? Maybe the threads would stay on track?
|
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"
...
So we can’t talk about sex in the lounge? That’s what you would like?
Can we all start to ask about stuff we don’t want to read in the lounge?
'The Lounge: The lounge is for general chat and discussion.'
That's what it says up at the top!
Unfortunately, it doesn't say anything pertinent unders the whingers Chat banner. Perhaps it should.
All I am suggesting is that we talk about sexual subjects in the area already provided for them. Keep the Lounge clear for general interest topics which are not categorised elsewhere."
Surely swingers chat is for swingers chat
I'm not a swinger and I enjoy the more light hearted approach in the lounge to the topics you mentioned. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"
...
So we can’t talk about sex in the lounge? That’s what you would like?
Can we all start to ask about stuff we don’t want to read in the lounge?
'The Lounge: The lounge is for general chat and discussion.'
That's what it says up at the top!
Unfortunately, it doesn't say anything pertinent unders the whingers Chat banner. Perhaps it should.
All I am suggesting is that we talk about sexual subjects in the area already provided for them. Keep the Lounge clear for general interest topics which are not categorised elsewhere."
I absolutely disagree. You should be able to talk about everything and anything in the lounge. (or a lounge.) on any forum. And I specially should be able to talk about sex in the lounge on a sex themed site.
I find it particularly interesting that I talk about Xbox games on here, when I’m specifically on an Xbox forum. I’ve talked about D&D in here when I’m on a D&D forum.
I come on Fab mainly because I’m interested in connecting with people who are sexy like me |
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"Geeting back to the original thrust, it would help if The Lounge was kept clear from all the topics which should be in Swingers Chat. All the stuff about size, foreskins, oral, anal, female orgasms etc.
Moving them obviously makes work for the moderators and one would hope that eventually everyone would understand why there are different forum areas.
Could be a while, though, before that happens."
Yes, more cake threads.
My first ever thread was let's talk about sex, which bombed.
My second thread was me asking for a recipe for Victoria sponge and it filled up very quickly.
Make of that what you will. |
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"
...
So we can’t talk about sex in the lounge? That’s what you would like?
Can we all start to ask about stuff we don’t want to read in the lounge?
'The Lounge: The lounge is for general chat and discussion.'
That's what it says up at the top!
Unfortunately, it doesn't say anything pertinent unders the whingers Chat banner. Perhaps it should.
All I am suggesting is that we talk about sexual subjects in the area already provided for them. Keep the Lounge clear for general interest topics which are not categorised elsewhere.
I absolutely disagree. You should be able to talk about everything and anything in the lounge. (or a lounge.) on any forum. And I specially should be able to talk about sex in the lounge on a sex themed site.
I find it particularly interesting that I talk about Xbox games on here, when I’m specifically on an Xbox forum. I’ve talked about D&D in here when I’m on a D&D forum.
I come on Fab mainly because I’m interested in connecting with people who are sexy like me "
The Lounge gives us a feel of people when they talk about sex, hobbies, likes/dislikes, humour, and of course cake preferences.
|
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"Geeting back to the original thrust, it would help if The Lounge was kept clear from all the topics which should be in Swingers Chat. All the stuff about size, foreskins, oral, anal, female orgasms etc.
Moving them obviously makes work for the moderators and one would hope that eventually everyone would understand why there are different forum areas.
Could be a while, though, before that happens.
Yes, more cake threads.
My first ever thread was let's talk about sex, which bombed.
My second thread was me asking for a recipe for Victoria sponge and it filled up very quickly.
Make of that what you will."
Clearly you are good at making a creamy sponge! |
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"Geeting back to the original thrust, it would help if The Lounge was kept clear from all the topics which should be in Swingers Chat. All the stuff about size, foreskins, oral, anal, female orgasms etc.
Moving them obviously makes work for the moderators and one would hope that eventually everyone would understand why there are different forum areas.
Could be a while, though, before that happens.
Yes, more cake threads.
My first ever thread was let's talk about sex, which bombed.
My second thread was me asking for a recipe for Victoria sponge and it filled up very quickly.
Make of that what you will.
Clearly you are good at making a creamy sponge!"
I can make a sponge creamy |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"
...
So we can’t talk about sex in the lounge? That’s what you would like?
Can we all start to ask about stuff we don’t want to read in the lounge?
'The Lounge: The lounge is for general chat and discussion.'
That's what it says up at the top!
Unfortunately, it doesn't say anything pertinent unders the whingers Chat banner. Perhaps it should.
All I am suggesting is that we talk about sexual subjects in the area already provided for them. Keep the Lounge clear for general interest topics which are not categorised elsewhere.
I absolutely disagree. You should be able to talk about everything and anything in the lounge. (or a lounge.) on any forum. And I specially should be able to talk about sex in the lounge on a sex themed site.
I find it particularly interesting that I talk about Xbox games on here, when I’m specifically on an Xbox forum. I’ve talked about D&D in here when I’m on a D&D forum.
I come on Fab mainly because I’m interested in connecting with people who are sexy like me "
I agree and disagree.
I agree that all topics are open. I disagree when I see monotonous sex threads in the first 3 pages that are duplicated in the swingers forum and so should be moved to make way for fresh threads. If people want to continue posting they just use their own green arrow
Much love to ya though woody |
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Lovely idea O.P.
I'll keep my eye out. The main problem will probably be that no one gives a fuck ....or is that the second problem with the first being that no one really reads what anyone else has put ..... most people come in do a quick bombing mission n whizz out .... |
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"
...
Yes, more cake threads.
My first ever thread was let's talk about sex, which bombed.
My second thread was me asking for a recipe for Victoria sponge and it filled up very quickly.
Make of that what you will."
There I was thinking that the 'Did somebody mention cake' responses, which were a characteristic of the 'in' crowd until fairly recently, had died a natural death.
Expecting a revival now! |
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"
...
Yes, more cake threads.
My first ever thread was let's talk about sex, which bombed.
My second thread was me asking for a recipe for Victoria sponge and it filled up very quickly.
Make of that what you will.
There I was thinking that the 'Did somebody mention cake' responses, which were a characteristic of the 'in' crowd until fairly recently, had died a natural death.
Expecting a revival now!"
Oooh cake ! Lol |
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"I like it how it is.
People can post what they want, when they want, skip what they want, take a break, ask the same question because they're new and may not have seen it asked before, talk total bollocks, make jokes, have fun, and generally dip in and out whenever.
The more you try and control forums the more you stifle chat.
If people want to 'delve deeper' with someone can't they just PM?
To me the forums aren't about meeting, going into graphic detail about anything unless you choose and whilst they provide a good insight into people's personalities, they're an escape from the other side of swinging - actually meeting and doing the sex.
It's a place to chill, take a break from life and waste time. "
This |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"I like it how it is.
People can post what they want, when they want, skip what they want, take a break, ask the same question because they're new and may not have seen it asked before, talk total bollocks, make jokes, have fun, and generally dip in and out whenever.
The more you try and control forums the more you stifle chat.
If people want to 'delve deeper' with someone can't they just PM?
To me the forums aren't about meeting, going into graphic detail about anything unless you choose and whilst they provide a good insight into people's personalities, they're an escape from the other side of swinging - actually meeting and doing the sex.
It's a place to chill, take a break from life and waste time.
This "
Whoever wrote that says it perfectl |
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By *bi HaiveMan 40 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"I like it how it is.
People can post what they want, when they want, skip what they want, take a break, ask the same question because they're new and may not have seen it asked before, talk total bollocks, make jokes, have fun, and generally dip in and out whenever.
The more you try and control forums the more you stifle chat.
If people want to 'delve deeper' with someone can't they just PM?
To me the forums aren't about meeting, going into graphic detail about anything unless you choose and whilst they provide a good insight into people's personalities, they're an escape from the other side of swinging - actually meeting and doing the sex.
It's a place to chill, take a break from life and waste time.
This
Whoever wrote that says it perfectl "
Thanks Woody.
*whoever......  |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"I personally would love it if someone else talked about race. I’m getting a bit of a reputation!!
I don't feel I'm qualified to
Yeah, I was just thinking this.
But maybe that’s it. As allies we should be doing some labour….?
I feel that I'm stepping through a minefield with a blindfold on though.
I get you. I was only joking though. I don’t mind being the one that talks about race so much
Serious question if I was to talk about race do you think my opinions would be taken seriously? "
In this forum maybe not. But maybe. Mine aren’t taken seriously so at least it’s not your race that is the reason you can’t start the thread  |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"I like it how it is.
….
It's a place to chill, take a break from life and waste time.
This
Whoever wrote that says it perfectl
Thanks Woody.
*whoever...... "
Haha. …. Whatevs’ |
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"How about we nominate forum reps?
Before anyone can post they have to send their contributions to the reps for amendments or redactions?
They will then issue a Memorandum of Understanding (MOU) allowing the poster to continue.
If the reps are unable to confirm they can run it upstairs to a forum committee for approval or dismissal.
"
I hope there's a lift to get upstairs! |
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By *essaMayWoman 40 weeks ago
Fairytale Wood |
Lets be honest the majority of posts are attention seeking or validation. The words may differ but in essence is the same. People start threads primarily to get attention they may not get otherwise.
They may dress them differently, but the essense is the same, more often than not they are self indulgent. Threads about others is just a platform for the starter raise themselves above others.
More often threads are like the game kids used to play - Trumps. My this trumps your that
But occasionally you do get some threads which are of value.
Just my thoughts |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"Lets be honest the majority of posts are attention seeking or validation. The words may differ but in essence is the same. People start threads primarily to get attention they may not get otherwise.
They may dress them differently, but the essense is the same, more often than not they are self indulgent. Threads about others is just a platform for the starter raise themselves above others.
More often threads are like the game kids used to play - Trumps. My this trumps your that
But occasionally you do get some threads which are of value.
Just my thoughts "
I think you're right. Even when we don't necessarily realise we're wanting attention!
Personally I like to see what people think about certain issues, how they approach situations etc. It's quite a microcosm here of how people think and impossible not to be fascinated by that. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman 40 weeks ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
Be the change you want to see in the forum. And keep trying, different people comment at different times and on different days.
Or don't. But if you don't try, you don't really have a reason to complain about the threads |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"Hey everyone,
I hope this message finds you well. I've been a part of our vibrant community for a while now, and I've got to say, I love the energy and the unique perspectives we all bring to the table. However, I've noticed something that's been on my mind, and I hope it's okay to share it here.
Sometimes, when I scroll through the forum, it feels like we're dancing to the same tune—discussing similar topics over and over. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for sharing and exploring, but I think we might be missing out on some golden opportunities to dive deeper and learn more from each other.
I get it, we're all here to swing and have a good time, and I'm not trying to rain on anyone's parade. But wouldn't it be cool if we mixed it up a bit more? Maybe we could introduce a little bit of gentle guidance on what we post. Nothing too strict, just a nudge to keep things fresh and encourage more of those juicy, thought-provoking chats that we all love when they happen.
What do you think? Could a sprinkle of moderation add some extra spice to our conversations and help us connect on even more levels? I'd love to hear your thoughts and keep making this space one of the best parts of our day."
Or just extremely tardy posts. Of course choice is ours to read or post.
Everyone goes through the same thing at one point. I like the mix as it is. Controlling what we post will never happen.
The doubling up makes interesting view points. I like how diverse we are. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"Be the change you want to see in the forum. And keep trying, different people comment at different times and on different days.
Or don't. But if you don't try, you don't really have a reason to complain about the threads "
Indeed NotsoPosh I agree |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"Lets be honest the majority of posts are attention seeking or validation. The words may differ but in essence is the same. People start threads primarily to get attention they may not get otherwise.
They may dress them differently, but the essense is the same, more often than not they are self indulgent. Threads about others is just a platform for the starter raise themselves above others.
More often threads are like the game kids used to play - Trumps. My this trumps your that
But occasionally you do get some threads which are of value.
Just my thoughts "
Mine are not attention seeking at all. I believe mine to be conversation starters as people here need to talk a lot is my opinion. |
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"Lets be honest the majority of posts are attention seeking or validation. The words may differ but in essence is the same. People start threads primarily to get attention they may not get otherwise.
They may dress them differently, but the essense is the same, more often than not they are self indulgent. Threads about others is just a platform for the starter raise themselves above others.
More often threads are like the game kids used to play - Trumps. My this trumps your that
But occasionally you do get some threads which are of value.
Just my thoughts "
Definitely this for sure. Some are harmless and others hide a nasty streak under their 'upbeat' threads depending on whether you blow smoke up their backsides or not |
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"The self appointed forum police and people’s desire to not stick their head out of the trenches, in case they miss out on a potential shag, kind of put the kybosh on this place being too interesting "
Hit nail on the head!
Unpopular opinions are squashed.
Debate turns into warfare.
Turns into forum bans.
So instead, everyone plays nice. Nothing to involved, just plain nice.
So the same topics repeated and repeated and repeated, because they are safe and everyone can play nice.
With one exception - the virus forum - that bunch are just damn frickin loopy and bonkers weird |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"I like it how it is.
People can post what they want, when they want, skip what they want, take a break, ask the same question because they're new and may not have seen it asked before, talk total bollocks, make jokes, have fun, and generally dip in and out whenever.
The more you try and control forums the more you stifle chat.
If people want to 'delve deeper' with someone can't they just PM?
To me the forums aren't about meeting, going into graphic detail about anything unless you choose and whilst they provide a good insight into people's personalities, they're an escape from the other side of swinging - actually meeting and doing the sex.
It's a place to chill, take a break from life and waste time. "
|
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|
By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"
...
Yes, more cake threads.
My first ever thread was let's talk about sex, which bombed.
My second thread was me asking for a recipe for Victoria sponge and it filled up very quickly.
Make of that what you will.
There I was thinking that the 'Did somebody mention cake' responses, which were a characteristic of the 'in' crowd until fairly recently, had died a natural death.
Expecting a revival now!"
Can you explain a bit more about the “in” crowd. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"Lets be honest the majority of posts are attention seeking or validation. The words may differ but in essence is the same. People start threads primarily to get attention they may not get otherwise.
They may dress them differently, but the essense is the same, more often than not they are self indulgent. Threads about others is just a platform for the starter raise themselves above others.
More often threads are like the game kids used to play - Trumps. My this trumps your that
But occasionally you do get some threads which are of value.
Just my thoughts "
I’m relatively new here. So not cynical about forum posters.
It’s like most things in life. There is good and bad. I just focus on the good.
If some posts something useful - knowledge, personal experience, advice, humor, etc. I take advantage of it.
If it’s negative or not helpful (could be helpful to others) I ignore it.
I think the original post was about have less repitive topics. No one is stopping you from being original.
But the moderators should not kill it and also fellow fabbers need to support the discussion, or else it dies prematurely.
In this thread, I have not understood what is meant by “in” crowd and “race” discussions. |
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In the past I've set up various forum sites and have to say that the more any forum is moderated the less people use them. I'm all for a top level moderator removing posts and even ban some users from the site but this must be done carefully.
What is set up for this site is great as a whole and personally, I don't think it should be changed. But I think some tweaking is possible i.e. when a Forum topic is created the person starting it should be able to remove posts completely. Not just the posts comments, as is now, but also the user name of that post. That also goes for individuals removing what they have posted and no time limit as to when they can be removed. The other thing that can become annoying is when +quote is used to reply. This should only include the first sentence of the quoted comment and also include the quoted persons user name and time of that comment.
As for adding some new ideas for the site as a whole, it would be great if users can create private groups/forums. These should always be available to the site moderators to keep everything within the rules but should be private to all other users unless invited into them.
|
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By *bi HaiveMan 40 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"In the past I've set up various forum sites and have to say that the more any forum is moderated the less people use them. I'm all for a top level moderator removing posts and even ban some users from the site but this must be done carefully.
What is set up for this site is great as a whole and personally, I don't think it should be changed. But I think some tweaking is possible i.e. when a Forum topic is created the person starting it should be able to remove posts completely. Not just the posts comments, as is now, but also the user name of that post. That also goes for individuals removing what they have posted and no time limit as to when they can be removed. The other thing that can become annoying is when +quote is used to reply. This should only include the first sentence of the quoted comment and also include the quoted persons user name and time of that comment.
As for adding some new ideas for the site as a whole, it would be great if users can create private groups/forums. These should always be available to the site moderators to keep everything within the rules but should be private to all other users unless invited into them.
"
Sorry, but that would be awful.
People would backtrack on anything they wrote that didn't go they way they anticipated, got responses that didn't agree with them or that they realised had exposed opinions that were revealing negative charachter traits.
Threads would become disjointed and unreadable if posts were removed at any point. You get 2 mins to delete at present which helps if you post something with typos for example, but the ability to remove something as and when you felt like it would be open to abuse. You'd instantly be able to wipe clean anything that you'd posted that may come back to haunt you at a later date and it would make the 'green arrow of truth' a redundant feature. And that is a very useful tool indeed. |
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"In the past I've set up various forum sites and have to say that the more any forum is moderated the less people use them. I'm all for a top level moderator removing posts and even ban some users from the site but this must be done carefully.
What is set up for this site is great as a whole and personally, I don't think it should be changed. But I think some tweaking is possible i.e. when a Forum topic is created the person starting it should be able to remove posts completely. Not just the posts comments, as is now, but also the user name of that post. That also goes for individuals removing what they have posted and no time limit as to when they can be removed. The other thing that can become annoying is when +quote is used to reply. This should only include the first sentence of the quoted comment and also include the quoted persons user name and time of that comment.
As for adding some new ideas for the site as a whole, it would be great if users can create private groups/forums. These should always be available to the site moderators to keep everything within the rules but should be private to all other users unless invited into them.
"
I've been a member of a site that had invite only groups and forum sections. They were mainly used to gossip, spread rumours and be nasty about people. I wouldn't want to be involved in anything like that |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"…..
I've been a member of a site that had invite only groups and forum sections. They were mainly used to gossip, spread rumours and be nasty about people. I wouldn't want to be involved in anything like that"
Yep. Friends groups and public forums are a whole different thing. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"…..
I've been a member of a site that had invite only groups and forum sections. They were mainly used to gossip, spread rumours and be nasty about people. I wouldn't want to be involved in anything like that
Yep. Friends groups and public forums are a whole different thing. "
There's none of that going on in Fab, no sir. |
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"…..
I've been a member of a site that had invite only groups and forum sections. They were mainly used to gossip, spread rumours and be nasty about people. I wouldn't want to be involved in anything like that
Yep. Friends groups and public forums are a whole different thing.
There's none of that going on in Fab, no sir. "
There isn't the ability to set up private forum threads or sections. I don't doubt people have gossip groups away from fab |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"…..
I've been a member of a site that had invite only groups and forum sections. They were mainly used to gossip, spread rumours and be nasty about people. I wouldn't want to be involved in anything like that
Yep. Friends groups and public forums are a whole different thing.
There's none of that going on in Fab, no sir.
There isn't the ability to set up private forum threads or sections. I don't doubt people have gossip groups away from fab"
People are nasty directly on the forums, they're just sneaky about it. They certainly spread rumours and gossip behind the scenes. Because people are people! |
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By *lder.Woman 40 weeks ago
Not Local |
I love your 'fresh from the training day' enthusiasm op, long may it continue
Parts of the forum are like that favourite, slightly smelly, dog eared old slipper though, people enjoy slipping it on and trundling about in a daydream drooling over cake and thighs with no higher thought than what's for tea. |
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By *a LunaWoman 40 weeks ago
South Wales |
"I love your 'fresh from the training day' enthusiasm op, long may it continue
Parts of the forum are like that favourite, slightly smelly, dog eared old slipper though, people enjoy slipping it on and trundling about in a daydream drooling over cake and thighs with no higher thought than what's for tea. "
You’re describing me there and I’m fine with it |
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"I love your 'fresh from the training day' enthusiasm op, long may it continue
Parts of the forum are like that favourite, slightly smelly, dog eared old slipper though, people enjoy slipping it on and trundling about in a daydream drooling over cake and thighs with no higher thought than what's for tea. "
Your imagery here is so accurate for my approach to the forums |
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"…..
I've been a member of a site that had invite only groups and forum sections. They were mainly used to gossip, spread rumours and be nasty about people. I wouldn't want to be involved in anything like that
Yep. Friends groups and public forums are a whole different thing.
There's none of that going on in Fab, no sir.
There isn't the ability to set up private forum threads or sections. I don't doubt people have gossip groups away from fab
People are nasty directly on the forums, they're just sneaky about it. They certainly spread rumours and gossip behind the scenes. Because people are people!"
Yep, and it does filter through into the forums because people can't help doing shit peopley stuff. Happy to believe everything that they're told. |
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"The self appointed forum police and people’s desire to not stick their head out of the trenches, in case they miss out on a potential shag, kind of put the kybosh on this place being too interesting "
I used to go bland as I thought it would up my chances. Now I am less so, and it makes no difference, except I have said what I think, and occasionally done so articulately! |
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"Sorry, but that would be awful.
People would backtrack on anything they wrote that didn't go they way they anticipated, got responses that didn't agree with them or that they realised had exposed opinions that were revealing negative charachter traits."
I hear you but also disagree to some point. For me, the reason I'd like to delete the post is more to rectify. I'm severely sight impaired now and use touch typing to create or add posts. The problem is when I make errors and it can be taken very wrong sometimes lol. |
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"I've been a member of a site that had invite only groups and forum sections. They were mainly used to gossip, spread rumours and be nasty about people. I wouldn't want to be involved in anything like that"
Sadly that All exists in general Forums already. You can't keep everyone happy its just a sad fact of being a human lol
All Forums and Groups on pretty much All Sites are Monitored by the Site Moderators and All Site Rules are enforced. What you suggested does happen in the some private groups as well and its for each member of those groups to leave or stay. The owners of those private groups set the tone for it and have the ability to remove anyone causing issues in it. For the Groups I set up and also joined, was pretty much all members we knew well as swingers and arrange meets etc.
|
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"
...
Yes, more cake threads.
My first ever thread was let's talk about sex, which bombed.
My second thread was me asking for a recipe for Victoria sponge and it filled up very quickly.
Make of that what you will.
There I was thinking that the 'Did somebody mention cake' responses, which were a characteristic of the 'in' crowd until fairly recently, had died a natural death.
Expecting a revival now!
Can you explain a bit more about the “in” crowd. "
Sure.
Anyone who starts a thread where people are required to reply with the phrase "I'm in".
Obviously not me as I've never started or joined such a thread! |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
|
"
...
Yes, more cake threads.
My first ever thread was let's talk about sex, which bombed.
My second thread was me asking for a recipe for Victoria sponge and it filled up very quickly.
Make of that what you will.
There I was thinking that the 'Did somebody mention cake' responses, which were a characteristic of the 'in' crowd until fairly recently, had died a natural death.
Expecting a revival now!
Can you explain a bit more about the “in” crowd.
Sure.
Anyone who starts a thread where people are required to reply with the phrase "I'm in".
Obviously not me as I've never started or joined such a thread!"
|
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By *oxy jWoman 40 weeks ago
somerset |
"Swinging is becoming more 'normal' so new people will likely ask similar questions etc. Give them space as you were once new to this."
if swinging was becoming more normal then where are all the new women and couples ??
there are less women and couples than ever on this scene than there were 30 years ago .... even on fab you can discount 50% of women / couples profiles as just being men then add in all those just here to use the site for non swinging there are a lot lot less than people think the only thing that has exp;oded is men joining here and else where ... and thats the reason why so many couples are now having private parties with only those they know ...
online sites will need to change before they go pop but they wont because just think of the money being made mainly from men .... real swinging i suspect will fully go underground as it was before the internet .... swinging is not becoming normal if it was we would be swamped with couples and women ...
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"Hey everyone,
I hope this message finds you well. I've been a part of our vibrant community for a while now, and I've got to say, I love the energy and the unique perspectives we all bring to the table. However, I've noticed something that's been on my mind, and I hope it's okay to share it here.
Sometimes, when I scroll through the forum, it feels like we're dancing to the same tune—discussing similar topics over and over. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for sharing and exploring, but I think we might be missing out on some golden opportunities to dive deeper and learn more from each other.
I get it, we're all here to swing and have a good time, and I'm not trying to rain on anyone's parade. But wouldn't it be cool if we mixed it up a bit more? Maybe we could introduce a little bit of gentle guidance on what we post. Nothing too strict, just a nudge to keep things fresh and encourage more of those juicy, thought-provoking chats that we all love when they happen.
What do you think? Could a sprinkle of moderation add some extra spice to our conversations and help us connect on even more levels? I'd love to hear your thoughts and keep making this space one of the best parts of our day."
Lead the way Op, show us what ya got
Mr |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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"I like it how it is.
People can post what they want, when they want, skip what they want, take a break, ask the same question because they're new and may not have seen it asked before, talk total bollocks, make jokes, have fun, and generally dip in and out whenever.
The more you try and control forums the more you stifle chat.
If people want to 'delve deeper' with someone can't they just PM?
To me the forums aren't about meeting, going into graphic detail about anything unless you choose and whilst they provide a good insight into people's personalities, they're an escape from the other side of swinging - actually meeting and doing the sex.
It's a place to chill, take a break from life and waste time. "
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