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Funniest fab chat up lines!

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By (user no longer on site) OP    45 weeks ago

Spoke to one of my female friends who joined the site last night and asked her to give me a laugh by posting the weirdest or funniest message she had in the 30 minutes she had been on. One guy messaged 'can I blow (cocaine) in your asshole and lick it out? made me chuckle! Who can better that?

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By *loomy GirlWoman 45 weeks ago

leicester

They say you should never judge a book by it’s cover but you look like you fuck better than my wife Xx

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By *ilverjagMan 45 weeks ago

swansea

Pick me because I always buy my condoms in bulk, that way I'll always be at least one jump ahead.

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By (user no longer on site) 45 weeks ago

If you were closer I'd be all over you, like a tramp on a bag of chips

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By (user no longer on site) 45 weeks ago

Hi, my nicknames Pinnochio. Sit on my face, and I'll tell you a lie or two.

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By *olly Goodhead83Woman 45 weeks ago

Basingstoke

This is definitely one that made me laugh…”I wanna crack an egg in your ass and fuck you so hard it scrambles”

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By *hrimper36Couple 45 weeks ago

Central France dept 36

This morning we had a great one liner from a Turkish guy that just said

“ do you like turkey”

So I replied

“Hi

Yes and chicken”

Why do some men even bother.????

T

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By *oupleus30Couple 45 weeks ago

Minster

No ridiculous messages to add from us but these comments have propa cracked me up lol ??

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By *elix SightedMan 45 weeks ago

Cloud 8

Best one I ever had was “Your site supporter pass is due for renewal.”

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By (user no longer on site) 45 weeks ago

Wait until you get the squirty cream up your bum guy, his very persistent!

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By *ife NinjaMan 45 weeks ago

Dunfermline


"Wait until you get the squirty cream up your bum guy, his very persistent!"

How many cans did you request?

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By *andPextraCouple 45 weeks ago

North West

Someone asked if he could measure my boobs in detail to take with him to a plastic surgeon for his partner to get implants like

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By *a LunaWoman 45 weeks ago

South Wales

My most favourite was the “I’d walk across a field of broken glass just to have a wank in your shadow”.

It reminded me of an ex who would say he’d walk across a field of broken glass just to dip a twig in my shit. I thought that was right romantic

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By *ife NinjaMan 45 weeks ago

Dunfermline


"My most favourite was the “I’d walk across a field of broken glass just to have a wank in your shadow”.

It reminded me of an ex who would say he’d walk across a field of broken glass just to dip a twig in my shit. I thought that was right romantic "

They do romance differently in the valleys

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By (user no longer on site) 45 weeks ago

If I come to London, will you meet me?

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By *aizyWoman 45 weeks ago

west midlands

Sit on my face and I'll guess your weight, if I get it wrong I'll eat the difference. That made me laugh.

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