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Winking etiquette
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What's the etiquette with winks on here?
If someone sends you a wink and you wink back, do you grab the bull by the horns and make the first move? Or do you sit and wait?
If you came here to say you don't like/send winks, go away. |
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"First winker sends the winkee as message. Otherwise you’re a wanker and there’ll be no playing with winkie."
I think wanker is a bit strong, but that's your opinion. However I agree with you on the rest  |
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Some people expect the person they are winking to carry the load and make the first move in regard to messaging.
I've had dozens of winks over the years that I've winked back and that's where the engagement ended.
I don't send first contact messages and haven't done for 4 years so I therefore don't wink at people either.
If they can't be arsed sending a message that's not on me  |
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"Some people expect the person they are winking to carry the load and make the first move in regard to messaging.
I've had dozens of winks over the years that I've winked back and that's where the engagement ended.
I don't send first contact messages and haven't done for 4 years so I therefore don't wink at people either.
If they can't be arsed sending a message that's not on me "
I hear you RB.
I've always said "lazy on the keyboard, lazy on the headboard" |
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If someone winks me, the most I’ll do is wink back. If they don’t message me then we’ll stay strangers.
Broadly I don’t check winks though. I like a forthright man and for me a wink is a little mild for my taste. |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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I never send winks but I state in my profile that if you're interested to send a wink. That way there's no pressure for them to message and at least I know there's interest there to make first contact. I don't get why some women and couples will send a wink, and still not reply to the first message though  |
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"I never send winks but I state in my profile that if you're interested to send a wink. That way there's no pressure for them to message and at least I know there's interest there to make first contact. I don't get why some women and couples will send a wink, and still not reply to the first message though "
They're toying with you, Joe |
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It seems most ladies either never look at the winks or see them as a lazy attempt to get in touch.
If I'm honest, that's a bit hippocritical if they expect you to write a decent message for them to just either hit delete or block as most do. But that's fab for you I guess. I understand that the ladies get bombarded with winks and messages in the hundreds though. It is what it is.
I think I've only had 2 or 3 respinses to winks, luckily one of them is now my fb.. So they do work..
So they can work if you wink at someone that understands what they're for and aren't just a lazy attempt to contact them. |
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By *JandJJCouple 42 weeks ago
Nuneaton |
"What's the etiquette with winks on here?
If someone sends you a wink and you wink back, do you grab the bull by the horns and make the first move? Or do you sit and wait?
If you came here to say you don't like/send winks, go away."
First thing to do is to have the manners to check if they like winks or not. |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"I never send winks but I state in my profile that if you're interested to send a wink. That way there's no pressure for them to message and at least I know there's interest there to make first contact. I don't get why some women and couples will send a wink, and still not reply to the first message though
They're toying with you, Joe"
It's a bloody liberty is what it is! |
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"What's the etiquette with winks on here?
If someone sends you a wink and you wink back, do you grab the bull by the horns and make the first move? Or do you sit and wait?
If you came here to say you don't like/send winks, go away.
First thing to do is to have the manners to check if they like winks or not."
Absolutely, PJandJJ |
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"I never send winks but I state in my profile that if you're interested to send a wink. That way there's no pressure for them to message and at least I know there's interest there to make first contact. I don't get why some women and couples will send a wink, and still not reply to the first message though
They're toying with you, Joe
It's a bloody liberty is what it is!"
Either that or your first messages are terrible. Food for thought |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"I do enjoy a wink or 2…. I guess it’s a quick way of seeing if potential is reciprocated … if a wink response is given then I’ll send a message …. 
Testing, testing "
One , two…. Message |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"Fucks sake. I was thinking of winking back a couple of winks I've had but I am just bamboozled now with the etiquette.  "
Bull by the horns is what I heard  |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"Fucks sake. I was thinking of winking back a couple of winks I've had but I am just bamboozled now with the etiquette.
Bull by the horns is what I heard "
 I am a retiring wallflower.. |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"Fucks sake. I was thinking of winking back a couple of winks I've had but I am just bamboozled now with the etiquette.
Bull by the horns is what I heard
I am a retiring wallflower.. "
Well snap out of that buttercup…. Cease the day hehe  |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"Fucks sake. I was thinking of winking back a couple of winks I've had but I am just bamboozled now with the etiquette.
Bull by the horns is what I heard
I am a retiring wallflower..
Well snap out of that buttercup…. Cease the day hehe "
Seize it? Buttercup?  |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"Fucks sake. I was thinking of winking back a couple of winks I've had but I am just bamboozled now with the etiquette.
Bull by the horns is what I heard
I am a retiring wallflower..
Well snap out of that buttercup…. Cease the day hehe
Seize it? Buttercup? "
Oh god damn even my pretend authoritative approach failed  |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"Fucks sake. I was thinking of winking back a couple of winks I've had but I am just bamboozled now with the etiquette.
Bull by the horns is what I heard
I am a retiring wallflower..
Well snap out of that buttercup…. Cease the day hehe
Seize it? Buttercup?
Oh god damn even my pretend authoritative approach failed "
It will stay between us, don't worry |
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"Countless times we've returned a wink and there's been radio silence. If someone returns a wink I think it's the green light to message "
Yes, I agree, this is how it should work.
Equally, I have had a similar experience, having winked back to an initial wink then nothing. If the initiator cannot be bothered to message having had a positive response, they are hardly likely to meet so nothing lost. |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"Fucks sake. I was thinking of winking back a couple of winks I've had but I am just bamboozled now with the etiquette.
Bull by the horns is what I heard
I am a retiring wallflower..
Well snap out of that buttercup…. Cease the day hehe
Seize it? Buttercup?
Oh god damn even my pretend authoritative approach failed
It will stay between us, don't worry "
Good … I wouldn’t want to look stupid in front of a whole room full of strangers |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"Fucks sake. I was thinking of winking back a couple of winks I've had but I am just bamboozled now with the etiquette.
Bull by the horns is what I heard
I am a retiring wallflower..
Well snap out of that buttercup…. Cease the day hehe
Seize it? Buttercup?
Oh god damn even my pretend authoritative approach failed
It will stay between us, don't worry
Good … I wouldn’t want to look stupid in front of a whole room full of strangers "
God no. Can you imagine? |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"Fucks sake. I was thinking of winking back a couple of winks I've had but I am just bamboozled now with the etiquette.
Bull by the horns is what I heard
I am a retiring wallflower..
Well snap out of that buttercup…. Cease the day hehe
Seize it? Buttercup?
Oh god damn even my pretend authoritative approach failed
It will stay between us, don't worry
Good … I wouldn’t want to look stupid in front of a whole room full of strangers
God no. Can you imagine? "
My winks would be ignored …. My messages would receive no response …I’d be outcast …. |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"Fucks sake. I was thinking of winking back a couple of winks I've had but I am just bamboozled now with the etiquette.
Bull by the horns is what I heard
I am a retiring wallflower..
Well snap out of that buttercup…. Cease the day hehe
Seize it? Buttercup?
Oh god damn even my pretend authoritative approach failed
It will stay between us, don't worry
Good … I wouldn’t want to look stupid in front of a whole room full of strangers
God no. Can you imagine?
My winks would be ignored …. My messages would receive no response …I’d be outcast …. "
Thanks for the Fabs though |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"Fucks sake. I was thinking of winking back a couple of winks I've had but I am just bamboozled now with the etiquette.
Bull by the horns is what I heard
I am a retiring wallflower..
Well snap out of that buttercup…. Cease the day hehe
Seize it? Buttercup?
Oh god damn even my pretend authoritative approach failed
It will stay between us, don't worry
Good … I wouldn’t want to look stupid in front of a whole room full of strangers
God no. Can you imagine?
My winks would be ignored …. My messages would receive no response …I’d be outcast ….
Thanks for the Fabs though "
Well appreciation where it’s due  |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"I delete all winks
Men across Fab weep with frustration!
I know I was going to send one.
 Poor woody
Ouch. I’m sending it to you instead then now. "
I don't feel second best not at all |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"I delete all winks
Men across Fab weep with frustration!
I know I was going to send one.
I mean you still can... But you'll be wasting your valuable time  "
I still can’t!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"I delete all winks
Men across Fab weep with frustration!
I know I was going to send one.
Poor woody
Ouch. I’m sending it to you instead then now.
I don't feel second best not at all "
That took me a lot of work to get that to you….
 |
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"I delete all winks
Men across Fab weep with frustration!
I know I was going to send one.
Poor woody
Ouch. I’m sending it to you instead then now.
I don't feel second best not at all "
What's for you, won't pass you by... |
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"What's the etiquette with winks on here?
If someone sends you a wink and you wink back, do you grab the bull by the horns and make the first move? Or do you sit and wait?
If you came here to say you don't like/send winks, go away."
Everyone has their own etiquette for this, I would imagine.
My filters are closed so if I want someone to be able to message me I will sometimes send a wink. |
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By *ewcatWoman 42 weeks ago
Berkshire |
"I never send winks but I state in my profile that if you're interested to send a wink. That way there's no pressure for them to message and at least I know there's interest there to make first contact. I don't get why some women and couples will send a wink, and still not reply to the first message though "
I was meant to wink? Eek, sorry I just dived right in with messaging |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"I delete all winks
Men across Fab weep with frustration!
I know I was going to send one.
Poor woody
Ouch. I’m sending it to you instead then now.
I don't feel second best not at all
That took me a lot of work to get that to you….
"
And I'm suitably grateful |
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A wink is a ‘come and have a look at me’
So it’s strange when people wink and have absolutely nothing to view on their profile or just dick pics
Also when you wink back after receiving one and nothing happens it’s a bit weird
K |
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By (user no longer on site) 42 weeks ago
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"It’s a lazy way of saying hi "
I understand this sentiment exactly, it's the equivalent of somebody on tinder just messaging you "hi" I can't stand that and ignore those.
But.....
I don't agree with it being lazy in fab world.
And here is why..
I don't think it's fair that we accept that it's OK for women to not reply to the 100's messages a day they get from guys, and in the same breath tell guys that they have to write out a lengthy message to the 100's of women.
I know the response is "guys don't need to message 100 women" but realistically, with the ratio on here guys have to reach out to alot of women to get a response.
I've messaged maybe 10 women on locals, im always very polite, friendly, the first few I sent out when I first started admittedly were brief "hey how's it going, I liked your profile and just wanted to touch base to see if you fancied a chat, if not, take care"
After that, I spent quite a bit of time looking through profiles and putting together (what I thought) were good thoughtful messages.
To still get zero response.
So, I don't think a wink is lazy at all.
We are all adults, we are all busy, we all have responsibilities, your time isn't more precious than my time.
A wink for me is showing somebody that you are interested in their profile, if they wink back, then I know its worth me investing my time to initiate a conversation with them.
I'm no longer sending long, thortful messages to someone who might just look at my pics and go "nah" and not even read what I wrote.
And I'm not saying I have an issue with women not replying, I agree with them not replying, it's too time consuming, but surely it's fair to have the same respect for the guys time no?
A mutual wink saves everybody's time.
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Mm is there an etiquette? If I receive one I may check them out and message with a thanks. I wouldn't send a wink back. As for sending think I've only ever sent two. Far easier to fab one of their pics . It catches their eye too |
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I'm the same. They have been useful to me, over the years used in this way 