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I don’t give girls flowers

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By (user no longer on site) OP 45 weeks ago

I’ll give you good wood though.

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By *stellaWoman 45 weeks ago

London

But….sunflowers, man!

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By *eliWoman 45 weeks ago

.

But what about splinters?

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By *atnip make me purrWoman 45 weeks ago

Reading

Wood works.

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By *wist my nipplesCouple 45 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly

Smoooooooth.

Mrs TMN x

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By (user no longer on site) OP 45 weeks ago

Bonus if you have heard the song x

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By *imply DeeWoman 45 weeks ago

Wherever

…I can buy myself flowers.

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By (user no longer on site) OP 45 weeks ago

"Smoooooooth.

Mrs TMN x"

Smoother than your arsehole x

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple 45 weeks ago

Southampton

I can buy myself flowers...

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By *wist my nipplesCouple 45 weeks ago

North East Scotland, mostly

"Smoooooooth.

Mrs TMN x

Smoother than your arsehole x"

You're not wrong. Was just away to trim.

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple 45 weeks ago

Lincoln

"But what about splinters? "

Just need to make sure you polish it

LvM

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By *eliWoman 45 weeks ago

.

"But what about splinters?

Just need to make sure you polish it

LvM"

Good point. I'm sure a lot of spit will help prevent any in my throat.

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By *ools and the brainCouple 45 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.

Seduction start's before the wood.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple 45 weeks ago

North West

I don't remember the last time I was given flowers. It was probably by a student.

I prefer hugs

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By *2000ManMan 45 weeks ago

Worthing

I don't send or give flowers. I have done but not really appreciated. I also heard both sis in laws reactions to flowers they received from my brothers. Same thing, not really appreciated.

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By *arlot o scaraWoman 45 weeks ago

Hell

They don’t give us flowers any more, they give us anxiety

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan 45 weeks ago

Gloucestershire

I normally offer a box of Milk Tray. Maybe this is where I'm going wrong

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By *eliWoman 45 weeks ago

.

"They don’t give us flowers any more, they give us anxiety

"

They've been doing that for many, many centuries - poor Anne Boleyn for one.

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By *ecadent_DevonMan 45 weeks ago

Okehampton

I leave a little bit of jizz on the curtains.

I like to think that as winter turns to spring and said (fortunate) lady reaches for her curtains to let the turning season in, she spots that little bit of jizz on her curtain, her eyes fire and a whimsical smile forms, with a shake of her head and a mirthful sigh, she whispers “oh DD, you shouldn’t have”

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By *arlot o scaraWoman 45 weeks ago

Hell

"They don’t give us flowers any more, they give us anxiety

They've been doing that for many, many centuries - poor Anne Boleyn for one.

"

Don’t. Everything I learned about her in history was apparently wrong

I’ve been watching a series about her on TikTok.

If I see Henry VIII in Hell, I’m gonna smash him one for our Anne.

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