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How long do you last?
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By *mf123Man
over a year ago
with one foot out the door |
Its probly the only reason im here now i dont give up on people i care about i grew up believing quitting on your friends is one of the worst things a man can do saying that tho the need has gone with time but should i be needed i will be there
Thats really all there is to say |
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By *emidemiWoman
over a year ago
basingstoke |
I don’t know.
I’m awful at letting myself be led on, and forgiving the excuses every time. I need to be tougher with myself this year I think, and not hold out so long for people.
What about you, OP? |
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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago
London |
"Before you give up on someone ?"
I never give up. Life is hard and who knows what the future holds, I just care for myself and lean into faith that what is meant for me will not pass me by, and that I simply don’t get to predict the timing. Faith is an imperative. What is life without the magical and the sense of something larger than us, who are we to deem ourselves most important? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Depends. Am I giving and not receiving? Is their energy matching mine? Am I the one always initiating whatever we have going on? If yes, I’m out of that shit before it gets more stinky.
If they are matching, giving, initiating just as much as me but excruciating circumstances are preventing us from seeing one another I may stick around.
It’s rather situational for me. Too many variables to try to quantify, label and perfectly say without having a real situation to look at. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
A long time.
I think a part of me doesn't really give up on people once I'm invested, even when I can tell that energy/headspace/effort isn't reciprocated. Or they're a twunt. :D
I do kind of slowly back away but it's not giving up, it's more protecting myself. It doesn't mean the care element isn't still there but it does mean that I put that energy back in to myself.
It can be hard to do because I'm a bit of a people pleaser. Hate hurting others. I'm slowly learning that it's okay to say something isn't working for me, to not put as much effort in to something when the other person doesn't reciprocate.
I hope you're okay Pickle.  |
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"A long time.
I think a part of me doesn't really give up on people once I'm invested, even when I can tell that energy/headspace/effort isn't reciprocated. Or they're a twunt. :D
I do kind of slowly back away but it's not giving up, it's more protecting myself. It doesn't mean the care element isn't still there but it does mean that I put that energy back in to myself.
It can be hard to do because I'm a bit of a people pleaser. Hate hurting others. I'm slowly learning that it's okay to say something isn't working for me, to not put as much effort in to something when the other person doesn't reciprocate.
I hope you're okay Pickle. "
Oh, all of this!
Mrs TMN x |
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By *zeroMan
over a year ago
Glasgow |
I really try not to give up on people. I'm not the best at making friends and I mean true friends not just associates or buddies. But sometimes when you look back it's just you making all the effort. Just you reaching out. Just you checking in. Then you stop to see if they reach back...and they don't.
Hope your OK Pickle. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Very difficult. I find it hard to have those conversations in a non-brutal way so probably keep them in my life longer than I should. But it's usually when I feel like the time and emotion I invest in them isn't reciprocated and as a result, I notice that if I stop contact, it pretty much takes care of itself. |
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Mush..... my disposable availability has shortened its lifespan to a month and that's me being generous. I've so many other people who do want to be in my life, I'm done wasting it on people who don't. Remembering that it's not me, its them. Helped me massively  |
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Varies enormously. Some have taken a year or more to get to know before a meet and well worth it. Others quick or don’t get anywhere. Really depends on how you connect or not so for me this is not a question |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Before you give up on someone ?"
In the relationship context it's a few years for me because the root causes of issues are usually two way, and they may be resolvable. On top there's always so many other things, kids, wealth, homes, extended families and friends, that get fucked up to varying degrees when you give up on someone / they give up on you. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It depends.
I'd never give up on my kids.
That’s real.
Trust me there have been times..."
I know people that have given up on their kids. In my family. It makes me so angry |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It really depends on the context.
I will say that since my divorce and as I've gotten older my tolerance is rather low.
I'll try with friends a few but aftwe a while I stop reaching out, they know where I am.
If it's someone from here then I don't give second chances. |
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"It depends.
I'd never give up on my kids.
That’s real.
Trust me there have been times...
I know people that have given up on their kids. In my family. It makes me so angry"
Without getting in too deep there are rare exceptions but for the most part you just stand in front, beside or behind them don't you.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It depends.
I'd never give up on my kids.
That’s real.
Trust me there have been times...
I know people that have given up on their kids. In my family. It makes me so angry
Without getting in too deep there are rare exceptions but for the most part you just stand in front, beside or behind them don't you.
"
Yeah. Since having my daughter I’m like, what wouldn’t I do for you?!! |
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"It depends.
I'd never give up on my kids.
That’s real.
Trust me there have been times...
I know people that have given up on their kids. In my family. It makes me so angry
Without getting in too deep there are rare exceptions but for the most part you just stand in front, beside or behind them don't you.
Yeah. Since having my daughter I’m like, what wouldn’t I do for you?!!"
Someone asked me once if I preferred one of our kids over the other  . I just said I'd stand in front of a speeding train for either of them.
It does become more difficult during the teenage years...just sayin'  |
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