FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Mental health
Mental health
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
I have to admit I'm struggling this week.
I lost my father early Tuesday morning. I was working away and got a call at 8.30 at night. I was by his bed side by midnioand was there until he passed around 6am.
I don't know if I'm coming or going at the moment. I know it will get better and easier.
For anyone else struggling this week I hope it get better for you too |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Sorry to hear that chap.
It's tough time of year for everyone who's lost someone whenever, but right now I can imagine.
Stop and talk to someone, anyone, if you're feeling really low. It'll help |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I have to admit I'm struggling this week.
I lost my father early Tuesday morning. I was working away and got a call at 8.30 at night. I was by his bed side by midnioand was there until he passed around 6am.
I don't know if I'm coming or going at the moment. I know it will get better and easier.
For anyone else struggling this week I hope it get better for you too "
Sorry to hear this Wonko. Hang in there brother |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
If it helps to assuage your very raw grief. Take comfort in that your father is at peace now, he is no longer in pain, nor is he suffering. His spirit lives within you and it always will |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Bloody hell mate- I don’t even know where to start, I hope you get the time to deal with it any way you need to. Hopefully you have a few close people to make sure you are ok, I and I’m sure others will send our condolences to you! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have to admit I'm struggling this week.
I lost my father early Tuesday morning. I was working away and got a call at 8.30 at night. I was by his bed side by midnioand was there until he passed around 6am.
I don't know if I'm coming or going at the moment. I know it will get better and easier.
For anyone else struggling this week I hope it get better for you too "
Sorry for your loss.
I lost mine a few months ago and today helped send one of my closest friends on his final journey.
It will take time, just be gentle on yourself and give yourself the time you need. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have to admit I'm struggling this week.
I lost my father early Tuesday morning. I was working away and got a call at 8.30 at night. I was by his bed side by midnioand was there until he passed around 6am.
I don't know if I'm coming or going at the moment. I know it will get better and easier.
For anyone else struggling this week I hope it get better for you too "
You know you have people here wonko  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have to admit I'm struggling this week.
I lost my father early Tuesday morning. I was working away and got a call at 8.30 at night. I was by his bed side by midnioand was there until he passed around 6am.
I don't know if I'm coming or going at the moment. I know it will get better and easier.
For anyone else struggling this week I hope it get better for you too "
Make sure you are not alone in your thoughts during this period.
It will be a gruelling busy period up to and during the funeral. Your feet will not touch the ground. You won't start grieving until after funeral. Right now you are in shock.
Draw comfort in that good people coalesce during tough times to help one another through. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
So sorry to hear this
I was the same when I lost my mum, didn’t know what to do, couldn’t really assemble my thoughts or even rationalise my emotions.
I made the mistake of focusing on the practical stuff, funeral, probate etc and didn’t deal with my grief and it came back to bite me badly.
Please please take time for you and talk to people about how you’re feeling, externalise it , allow yourself to grieve, don’t bottle it up.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"So sorry to hear this
I was the same when I lost my mum, didn’t know what to do, couldn’t really assemble my thoughts or even rationalise my emotions.
I made the mistake of focusing on the practical stuff, funeral, probate etc and didn’t deal with my grief and it came back to bite me badly.
Please please take time for you and talk to people about how you’re feeling, externalise it , allow yourself to grieve, don’t bottle it up.
"
Don't be so hard on yourself. Be mindful you had a lot to deal with. You had to do all those things. Grief comes later and yes it does come at you when you aren't looking. Something innocuous triggers it, then you process it, then life goes on. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
There's absolutely no 'right' way to deal with grief and suffering in these circumstances. Expect to feel a variety of emotions from relief to guilt and everything in between.
Everyone processes these tragic circumstances in different ways and at different paces.
Losing a parent is probably one of the most stressful things that can happen to a person in their life, get everyone in your circle behind you and don't be afraid to call on your GP and local CMHT for further help if you need it. x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Oh Wonko. I'm so incredibly sorry to read about your such sad news. I'm afraid I don't have a magic wand to make the pain go away, but look after yourself, and keep remembering the good times you shared with your Dad. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ddie1966Man
over a year ago
Paper Town Central, Essex. |
Really sad to hear this bad news buddy.
My thoughts go out to you and your family at this sad time.
It's hard to understand what your going through, but like you, I've been there.
It's difficult but the pain of such loss does re_ede and although it may not seem like it at the moment, things get better.
Don't think of this time of year in a bad way, but hold on to the memories of the good times as a positive and turn things around.
Stay safe.
Stay sane. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I'm sorry Wonko. I'm glad that you got to be there with him. Make sure to take care of yourself. I've lost two people close to Christmas and it seems to hit
hard at this time of year. You'll be feeling raw now I'm sure, so seek support around you if you can. And don't be afraid to let the grief in and allow yourself to feel. Sending a virtual hug. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Sorry to hear about that Wonko. I lost my wife to cancer a couple of months ago. We were active on here 3-4 years ago until she contracted it. Hellish three years followed. I just feel so incredibly alone ATM to be honest. I think I am going to start posting more in here.....I miss the sense of community I felt here in the past.
First posts in two years.   |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Sending you our condolences, Wonko, and echoing the excellent advice from many others about seeking support and giving yourself time to grieve and process your Dad's death. We hope you have people close to you, be they family, friends, colleagues etc who can offer you a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Sorry to hear of your loss.
Be gentle to yourself over the next few weeks. Lean into those close to you for comfort as and when you need it. Talk about your grief, loss, and also the great memories you two may have shared together throughout life.
Allow yourself time to feel the roller coaster of emotions you’ll eventually experience for the next months.
Even if it’s difficult, try to remember his pain and suffering has ended int his physical world. His spirit will forever continue shining.
My condolences. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
hmmmm
yeah been a tough year, my wife and daughter had to move in with her parents due to financal issues. my brother died in his sleep from a blood clot in his brain no warning.
my wife told me she had met someone else and wanted a divorce, her new partner is a criminal out on probation for abh and has previous. Had the cheek to threaten me not realising what my job is!
my ex wife is threating to rufuse me access to my daughter unless I give her more money. So my life was turned upside down.
my dad is slowly wasting away and my mum is threating to kill herself.
I stayed in my bedroom for 3 days without eating or sleeping. drank and took enough drugs to put motley crue to shame.
evently slept and woke up still alive?????
things can only go up from here |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
oh and at some point in my state I ran out of booze so went to a dodgey 24h off license in a bad area of brixton at 3am
2 guys pulled a knife on me and told me to hand over the booze. I dropped it and told them if they wanted it they wouldhave to take it. I told them if youre gonna pull a knife then have the balls to use it.
they told me I was fuked up and ran off. I really didn't care at that point |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It will take time OP and you’ll be up and down for a very long time, but it does get easier with time believe me.
Just take time to reflect and enjoy the time you did have him. You will get there eventually.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
Dear Wonko,
I am so dreadfully sorry for you, upon hearing of your Dad's passing. It's so hard losing someone so close and loved. They're never truly gone as long as their echoes resound in our hearts and our memories of them. All my love to you in your sorrow.
Davina |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Hey Wonko.
I've been there. Most or many of us have been there.
Just expect it to be shit, confusing, full of elation over the good times, anger they're gone, resentment for how shit they were sometimes/most times (well, that's part of us loving our parents...judging them cruelly as their kids)..and frankly all sorts of things you may never have felt before.
Just ride the dragon's tail, find somewhere to let the shit out, and then you'll get to the place, after a few months, when he's still with you, even though he's not with you.
Hit walls. Hard. Maybe even good friends. Harder.
Don't kick puppies x. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Bloody hell mate- I don’t even know where to start, I hope you get the time to deal with it any way you need to. Hopefully you have a few close people to make sure you are ok, I and I’m sure others will send our condolences to you! "
This.
Grief is so very personal and normal, and has to be gone through. Be kind to yourself. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I have to admit I'm struggling this week.
I lost my father early Tuesday morning. I was working away and got a call at 8.30 at night. I was by his bed side by midnioand was there until he passed around 6am.
I don't know if I'm coming or going at the moment. I know it will get better and easier.
For anyone else struggling this week I hope it get better for you too "
Oh wonko I'm so sorry  hugs x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I have to admit I'm struggling this week.
I lost my father early Tuesday morning. I was working away and got a call at 8.30 at night. I was by his bed side by midnioand was there until he passed around 6am.
I don't know if I'm coming or going at the moment. I know it will get better and easier.
For anyone else struggling this week I hope it get better for you too "
I’m sorry for your loss. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I have to admit I'm struggling this week.
I lost my father early Tuesday morning. I was working away and got a call at 8.30 at night. I was by his bed side by midnioand was there until he passed around 6am.
I don't know if I'm coming or going at the moment. I know it will get better and easier.
For anyone else struggling this week I hope it get better for you too "
Sorry to read that but at least you were there for him at the end. I was with my wife when she passed away a few months ago. It was kind of beautiful but also horrible in equal measure, I thought. It takes time (a long time, I think) and support, which I hope you have. Take every day as it comes and take care of yourself. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
