FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > The stigma of being new here

The stigma of being new here

By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

Can't get varified this I think every woman on here thinks you either ain't serious or not worth a couple seconds to say sorry no thanks , I've not sent one dick pic I've always been polite . It's like I ain't in the clique yet . Any advice would be massively appreciated

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Advice?

Just take a minute and think about it.

Maybe a few minutes.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Have you been here before or are you brand new OP?

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Is there a stigma to being new?

Do you think after a certain amount of time elapses that the floodgates open and they all fly at you flaps akimbo?

What are your expectations of the site OP? And have you read the FAQs?

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By *electableicecreamMan over a year ago

The West

Best advice is to read the FAQ and then use the forum search to look for threads about 'advice'.

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By *umblecutMan over a year ago

Finchley

Dude, think about changing some of your pics.

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

2 days in

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

I admit my pics are awful .I just have a bad camera on my phone lol and I'm useless

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By *hawn ScottMan over a year ago

london Brixton

People can be cruel when you're new, calling you briefcase wanker etc

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough

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By *hePerkyPumpkinTV/TS over a year ago

Bristol

"People can be cruel when you're new, calling you briefcase wanker etc"

Shouldn't have bought a briefcase to school then... posh twat

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By *penbicoupleCouple over a year ago

Northampton

That's not stigma.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can't get varified "

Others have told you to look at the FAQs and also other threads on people having trouble getting verified.

Answer is to go to socials, or clubs, or you can get verified through cams (but I stay away from them cos there be dragons in that section of Fab)

"this I think every woman on here thinks you either ain't serious or not worth a couple seconds to say sorry no thanks , "

Probably not a good idea to generalise - unless you have sent an email to 'every woman' on Fab - in which case, that may not be the best approach.

Also, I would suggest that you add more to your profile as it does not really tell women much about what you are like or looking for - though life changing event interests me (just nosey)

"I've not sent one dick pic I've always been polite . "

Good lad, that's the way to go.

"It's like I ain't in the clique yet . "

Don't mention the clique. You have to become a platinum member before you even get to apply to the clique. Then the clique only has a very short window for applications, with the AGM varying its location, this year it will be at the 251 bus stop on Oakleigh Road South, opposite Tesco's at the end of Manor Drive. The meeting is set for 22.55 on Tuesday 19th December and will close at 23.02 - you have to get your application forms from the bus driver, fill them in on the bus, get off at the bus stop and hand them to one of the clique members, if you can spot them as sometimes they go in to the Tesco car park for a quick Fag.

"Any advice would be massively appreciated

Advice offered freely above. Hope it helps.

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By *oro75Man over a year ago

middlesbrough

Try a picture with a toilet in

A bedroom with clothes on the floor

Seems to work for most

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By *hePerkyPumpkinTV/TS over a year ago

Bristol

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough"

Dude, it's not going to be easy on here. And with that sort of attitude it's going to be impossible.

You've got to be patient.

Maybe it will happen

Maybe it won't.

There's no use feeling beat up about it.

Hope it all work out for you.

Best of luck!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There’s no stigma and time has no meaning in fabworld..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough"

How do approach women normally? If you get to a certain age and you haven't a clue how to attract a woman, what are you gonna do when you're alone with them?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough"

OP when you reply to a message in the thread can you use the +quote as then we know who you are talking to (and don't be rude to Prey cos she will eat you alive - literally!)

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By *ou only live onceMan over a year ago

London

2 weeks is really no time at all, OP.

On the forum, just get stuck in. You won't be new for long. But remember the forum's only a tiny bit of the site too.

Good luck!

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By *ebauchedDeviantsPt2Couple over a year ago

Cumbria

"Advice?

Just take a minute and think about it.

Maybe a few minutes.

This is very good advice.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough

How do approach women normally? If you get to a certain age and you haven't a clue how to attract a woman, what are you gonna do when you're alone with them? "

This may sound cruel but it's absolutely true.

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By *inger_SnapWoman over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

For a start, you could at least get photo verified, so the ladies know they're talking to a man.

Can I ask what you were expecting in the first 2 weeks?

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By *inger_SnapWoman over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Oh... And consider your status updates very carefully

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough

How do approach women normally? If you get to a certain age and you haven't a clue how to attract a woman, what are you gonna do when you're alone with them?

This may sound cruel but it's absolutely true.

So my caveman approach, using a club and then pulling them along behind me is not the recommended method?

I shall have words with Miss Misty, cos I am sure that was the advice at Misty Manor, or have I misunderstood her when she said that she was going to use a club and lay me in the patio, it was not a subtle overture?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman over a year ago

little house on the praire

You've only been here two weeks. Better profile and pictures might help. You need to sell yourself

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By *TG3Man over a year ago

Dorchester

"Can't get varified this I think every woman on here thinks you either ain't serious or not worth a couple seconds to say sorry no thanks , I've not sent one dick pic I've always been polite . It's like I ain't in the clique yet . Any advice would be massively appreciated

"
well get in the clique its easy

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By *ucka39Man over a year ago

Newcastle

Hi op

Maybe start by checking out other users profile see what they've been doing which you've not

Make some effort remember it can become rewarding

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Get used to the fact that women who don't look too good themselves will want to meet only hot guys....:D

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Get used to the fact that women who don't look too good themselves will want to meet only hot guys....:D"

Ohhh, you are brave.

I am pulling up an armchair

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Get used to the fact that women who don't look too good themselves will want to meet only hot guys....:D"

Yeah the hot guys are desperate to fuck me.

Don't be sad.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Seriously 2 weeks

Women are here of their own accord, not just laid around with legs open waiting to be filled by anyone passing

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Seriously 2 weeks

Women are here of their own accord, not just laid around with legs open waiting to be filled by anyone passing

That's not what my mate Dave told me down the pub!

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By *TG3Man over a year ago

Dorchester

"Seriously 2 weeks

Women are here of their own accord, not just laid around with legs open waiting to be filled by anyone passing

"
really..... Damn...... Need to rethink

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By *ealitybitesMan over a year ago

Belfast

"Get used to the fact that women who don't look too good themselves will want to meet only hot guys....:D"

I'm playing them at their own game.

I've been meeting a hot woman for 4 years now and she hasn't copped on yet that she's punching below.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Seriously 2 weeks

Women are here of their own accord, not just laid around with legs open waiting to be filled by anyone passing

That's not what my mate Dave told me down the pub!"

I bet

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Seriously 2 weeks

Women are here of their own accord, not just laid around with legs open waiting to be filled by anyone passing

really..... Damn...... Need to rethink

ROFL.. Maybe its me who didn't get the leg spreader message!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Honestly - get used to being ignored

Expect that you will be ignored and it is then a pleasant surprise when you get the odd response here and there

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By *ustBoWoman over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough"

Some women might feel like they are on a pedestal on here,most don't.

They do however expect to be treated like a person and being polite is a basic requirement and doesn't make anyone special on here .Not sending a dick pic is also not something that makes you special most men who have any idea how to chat with women would know that anyhow.

You are on here two weeks and already expect women to be dropping their knickers because you messaged them,it rarely happens like that.

I'll answer a message if a profile appeals to me I won't if it doesn't. If someone thinks I'm rude because of that well that's their issue I don't really care.

I'm not here to please random people or interact with them to make them feel better.

It's fab I've met some absolutely amazing people and continue to do so.

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By *ackformore100Man over a year ago

Tin town

Take what you know about human interaction and burn it.

Expect nothing.

Don't expect kindness and being made welcome.

Expect to be patronised.

Welcome and good luck op.

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By *avexxMan over a year ago

cheshire

im dave and i never said such a thing,,

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By *icolasHidalgoDeCorazonMan over a year ago

St Leonards

"Is there a stigma to being new?

Do you think after a certain amount of time elapses that the floodgates open and they all fly at you flaps akimbo?

What are your expectations of the site OP? And have you read the FAQs?"

I'm not doing anything on this thread, but I'm stealing "Flaps Akimbo".

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By *hat3wordsMan over a year ago

North West & Wales

Revisit your written profile.

Break up your sentences.

Remove your Dr's notes (i'd be worried your going to croak it during the money shot).

Lastly, patience, politeness and decent intro when messaging.

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By *hawn ScottMan over a year ago

london Brixton

Well the clue is in the name of the site. When my wife and I joined it was because we assumed it was couples looking to meet other couples.

Had great fun and succes here but unfortunately I am now single so don't bother. I am now only looking for social meets and friends and have sent 2 messages in the last 6 months to women close by looking for the same thing.

Guess what no reply, I didn't take it personally and have found getting out and going to munches is much better.

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough

Some women might feel like they are on a pedestal on here,most don't.

You are on here two weeks and already expect women to be dropping their knickers because you messaged them,it rarely happens like that.

I'll answer a message if a profile appeals to me I won't if it doesn't. If someone thinks I'm rude because of that well that's their issue I don't really care.

I'm not here to please random people or interact with them to make them feel better.

It's fab I've met some absolutely amazing people and continue to do so.

If you expected fab to be an easy way to get sex it isn't,especially for men. But plenty of men who know how to interact and make an effort do very well on here and they don't look to blame others for any luck of success either. "
your all getting the wrong idea , Im not expecting everyone to accept me and I ain't expecting instant sex ,I imagine it's overrun with guys messaging all the time thus women are just desensitized to another 'new guy' coming along trying his hardest to just get a hello in return , if I was messaged by some fat pig I'd still answer and say I'm sorry not my type but good luck on here , how hard is that ,

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman over a year ago

Carlisle usually

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough"

Oh? You don't like facetious? May be best not to engage then

Where's the pedestal? Is it behind a timed gate?

And what do you define as manners? Bearing in mind that the site FAQs say no reply should be taken as a no thanks, and on new picture days the inbox is far into triple figures

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman over a year ago

Essex

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough

Some women might feel like they are on a pedestal on here,most don't.

You are on here two weeks and already expect women to be dropping their knickers because you messaged them,it rarely happens like that.

I'll answer a message if a profile appeals to me I won't if it doesn't. If someone thinks I'm rude because of that well that's their issue I don't really care.

I'm not here to please random people or interact with them to make them feel better.

It's fab I've met some absolutely amazing people and continue to do so.

If you expected fab to be an easy way to get sex it isn't,especially for men. But plenty of men who know how to interact and make an effort do very well on here and they don't look to blame others for any luck of success either. your all getting the wrong idea , Im not expecting everyone to accept me and I ain't expecting instant sex ,I imagine it's overrun with guys messaging all the time thus women are just desensitized to another 'new guy' coming along trying his hardest to just get a hello in return , if I was messaged by some fat pig I'd still answer and say I'm sorry not my type but good luck on here , how hard is that ,"

“Some fat pig”

Your fab experience just went even more downhill.

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By *ebauchedDeviantsPt2Couple over a year ago

Cumbria

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough

Some women might feel like they are on a pedestal on here,most don't.

You are on here two weeks and already expect women to be dropping their knickers because you messaged them,it rarely happens like that.

I'll answer a message if a profile appeals to me I won't if it doesn't. If someone thinks I'm rude because of that well that's their issue I don't really care.

I'm not here to please random people or interact with them to make them feel better.

It's fab I've met some absolutely amazing people and continue to do so.

If you expected fab to be an easy way to get sex it isn't,especially for men. But plenty of men who know how to interact and make an effort do very well on here and they don't look to blame others for any luck of success either. your all getting the wrong idea , Im not expecting everyone to accept me and I ain't expecting instant sex ,I imagine it's overrun with guys messaging all the time thus women are just desensitized to another 'new guy' coming along trying his hardest to just get a hello in return , if I was messaged by some fat pig I'd still answer and say I'm sorry not my type but good luck on here , how hard is that ,"

Oh dear, enjoy the other bitter men backing you up but don’t expect to meet a woman or a couple after this.

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By *ools and the brainCouple over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough

Some women might feel like they are on a pedestal on here,most don't.

You are on here two weeks and already expect women to be dropping their knickers because you messaged them,it rarely happens like that.

I'll answer a message if a profile appeals to me I won't if it doesn't. If someone thinks I'm rude because of that well that's their issue I don't really care.

I'm not here to please random people or interact with them to make them feel better.

It's fab I've met some absolutely amazing people and continue to do so.

If you expected fab to be an easy way to get sex it isn't,especially for men. But plenty of men who know how to interact and make an effort do very well on here and they don't look to blame others for any luck of success either. your all getting the wrong idea , Im not expecting everyone to accept me and I ain't expecting instant sex ,I imagine it's overrun with guys messaging all the time thus women are just desensitized to another 'new guy' coming along trying his hardest to just get a hello in return , if I was messaged by some fat pig I'd still answer and say I'm sorry not my type but good luck on here , how hard is that ,

“Some fat pig”

Your fab experience just went even more downhill. "

Ruh roh

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

"Well the clue is in the name of the site. When my wife and I joined it was because we assumed it was couples looking to meet other couples.

You got the nail right on the head with that comment bro it's like you read my mind

Guess what no reply, I didn't take it personally and have found getting out and going to munches is much better. "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" if I was messaged by some fat pig I'd still answer and say I'm sorry not my type but good luck on here , how hard is that ,"

Wow, i mean that says it all for me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough

Some women might feel like they are on a pedestal on here,most don't.

You are on here two weeks and already expect women to be dropping their knickers because you messaged them,it rarely happens like that.

I'll answer a message if a profile appeals to me I won't if it doesn't. If someone thinks I'm rude because of that well that's their issue I don't really care.

I'm not here to please random people or interact with them to make them feel better.

It's fab I've met some absolutely amazing people and continue to do so.

If you expected fab to be an easy way to get sex it isn't,especially for men. But plenty of men who know how to interact and make an effort do very well on here and they don't look to blame others for any luck of success either. your all getting the wrong idea , Im not expecting everyone to accept me and I ain't expecting instant sex ,I imagine it's overrun with guys messaging all the time thus women are just desensitized to another 'new guy' coming along trying his hardest to just get a hello in return , if I was messaged by some fat pig I'd still answer and say I'm sorry not my type but good luck on here , how hard is that ,"

Oink

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" your all getting the wrong idea , Im not expecting everyone to accept me and I ain't expecting instant sex ,I imagine it's overrun with guys messaging all the time thus women are just desensitized to another 'new guy' coming along trying his hardest to just get a hello in return , if I was messaged by some fat pig I'd still answer and say I'm sorry not my type but good luck on here , how hard is that ,

“Some fat pig”

Your fab experience just went even more downhill. "

Uh, oh, that did not go well OP. Seriously, take care of the words you use, you may not mean to give the wrong impression, but 'fat pig' is not endearing you to the women of Fab.

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By *parkle1974Woman over a year ago

Leeds

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By *ou only live onceMan over a year ago

London

Oh-o!

You know that stigma you were worried about, OP...

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By *inger_SnapWoman over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

"Revisit your written profile.

Break up your sentences.

Remove your Dr's notes (i'd be worried your going to croak it during the money shot).

Lastly, patience, politeness and decent intro when messaging.

Yeah... TMI

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By *parkle1974Woman over a year ago

Leeds

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough

Some women might feel like they are on a pedestal on here,most don't.

You are on here two weeks and already expect women to be dropping their knickers because you messaged them,it rarely happens like that.

I'll answer a message if a profile appeals to me I won't if it doesn't. If someone thinks I'm rude because of that well that's their issue I don't really care.

I'm not here to please random people or interact with them to make them feel better.

It's fab I've met some absolutely amazing people and continue to do so.

If you expected fab to be an easy way to get sex it isn't,especially for men. But plenty of men who know how to interact and make an effort do very well on here and they don't look to blame others for any luck of success either. your all getting the wrong idea , Im not expecting everyone to accept me and I ain't expecting instant sex ,I imagine it's overrun with guys messaging all the time thus women are just desensitized to another 'new guy' coming along trying his hardest to just get a hello in return , if I was messaged by some fat pig I'd still answer and say I'm sorry not my type but good luck on here , how hard is that ,"

Well that's your fab experience over before it's even begun!

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By *ealitybitesMan over a year ago

Belfast

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough

Some women might feel like they are on a pedestal on here,most don't.

You are on here two weeks and already expect women to be dropping their knickers because you messaged them,it rarely happens like that.

I'll answer a message if a profile appeals to me I won't if it doesn't. If someone thinks I'm rude because of that well that's their issue I don't really care.

I'm not here to please random people or interact with them to make them feel better.

It's fab I've met some absolutely amazing people and continue to do so.

If you expected fab to be an easy way to get sex it isn't,especially for men. But plenty of men who know how to interact and make an effort do very well on here and they don't look to blame others for any luck of success either. your all getting the wrong idea , Im not expecting everyone to accept me and I ain't expecting instant sex ,I imagine it's overrun with guys messaging all the time thus women are just desensitized to another 'new guy' coming along trying his hardest to just get a hello in return , if I was messaged by some fat pig I'd still answer and say I'm sorry not my type but good luck on here , how hard is that ,"

You need to back away from the keyboard buddy and get control of that JCB before you dig yourself in any deeper.

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By *inger_SnapWoman over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

" if I was messaged by some fat pig I'd still answer and say I'm sorry not my type but good luck on here , how hard is that ,

Wow, i mean that says it all for me

Nail in the coffin

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By *electableicecreamMan over a year ago

The West

You walked into the lioness's den op. Men post threads like this everyday. Expect no mercy.

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

“Some fat pig”

Your fab experience just went even more downhill.

Uh, oh, that did not go well OP. Seriously, take care of the words you use, you may not mean to give the wrong impression, but 'fat pig' is not endearing you to the women of Fab."
I know I was getting words out without thinking I just ment someone not my type, my bad , a poor choice of words , just got a bit annoyed with being dug out for asking for advice , there's some amazing helpfull people here but a few seem to wanna poke and try to demeen

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By *TG3Man over a year ago

Dorchester

Lol oh well better luck on the next site

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By *umblecutMan over a year ago

Finchley

"Get used to the fact that women who don't look too good themselves will want to meet only hot guys....:D

Ohhh, you are brave.

I am pulling up an armchair

Wait! Don't start just yet. Let me get some popcorn

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

"Revisit your written profile.

Break up your sentences.

Remove your Dr's notes (i'd be worried your going to croak it during the money shot).

Lastly, patience, politeness and decent intro when messaging.

Yeah... TMI"
I'm just proud of my achievements 5 stone in a year is awesome

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Lol oh well better luck on the next site

Or with the next profile

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By *parkle1974Woman over a year ago

Leeds

"Get used to the fact that women who don't look too good themselves will want to meet only hot guys....:D

Ohhh, you are brave.

I am pulling up an armchair

Wait! Don't start just yet. Let me get some popcorn "

Budge up, I wanna watch this

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By *archelCouple over a year ago

A field somewhere

Here for the comments

lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough

Some women might feel like they are on a pedestal on here,most don't.

You are on here two weeks and already expect women to be dropping their knickers because you messaged them,it rarely happens like that.

I'll answer a message if a profile appeals to me I won't if it doesn't. If someone thinks I'm rude because of that well that's their issue I don't really care.

I'm not here to please random people or interact with them to make them feel better.

It's fab I've met some absolutely amazing people and continue to do so.

If you expected fab to be an easy way to get sex it isn't,especially for men. But plenty of men who know how to interact and make an effort do very well on here and they don't look to blame others for any luck of success either. your all getting the wrong idea , Im not expecting everyone to accept me and I ain't expecting instant sex ,I imagine it's overrun with guys messaging all the time thus women are just desensitized to another 'new guy' coming along trying his hardest to just get a hello in return , if I was messaged by some fat pig I'd still answer and say I'm sorry not my type but good luck on here , how hard is that ,"

I just don't what the problem is op. You seem lovely.

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By *TG3Man over a year ago

Dorchester

"Lol oh well better luck on the next site

Or with the next profile

"
well true, people change their names here all the time difficult to know who you're talking to

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

No one can tell you what to do.... but if I was you I'd ask the mods to close the thread (not delete just close) after making an apology for a frustrated but rude comment. Make a cuppa. Take a breather. Slow down your thoughts before you write any posts.

I hope you do this as there are some good threads to join. There's also good threads on health issues and supportive people

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

"Not at all , I'd just like a bit of manners. And I don't expect people to just come flooding like your silly comment.makes you feel like they all been put on a pedestal and we ain't good enough

Some women might feel like they are on a pedestal on here,most don't.

You are on here two weeks and already expect women to be dropping their knickers because you messaged them,it rarely happens like that.

I'll answer a message if a profile appeals to me I won't if it doesn't. If someone thinks I'm rude because of that well that's their issue I don't really care.

I'm not here to please random people or interact with them to make them feel better.

It's fab I've met some absolutely amazing people and continue to do so.

If you expected fab to be an easy way to get sex it isn't,especially for men. But plenty of men who know how to interact and make an effort do very well on here and they don't look to blame others for any luck of success either. your all getting the wrong idea , Im not expecting everyone to accept me and I ain't expecting instant sex ,I imagine it's overrun with guys messaging all the time thus women are just desensitized to another 'new guy' coming along trying his hardest to just get a hello in return , if I was messaged by some fat pig I'd still answer and say I'm sorry not my type but good luck on here , how hard is that ,

I just don't what the problem is op. You seem lovely. "
I apologize profusely for u sing the term fat pig , I was not refering to anyone at all im typing on a crap phone and just stumbled on a bad choice of words once again I apologize

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

"Have you been here before or are you brand new OP?"
I'm a noobie

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple over a year ago

Leeds

It's always the cliques fault, you don't want to be in it their all knobs.

But look yo local socials their easy to get verified.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"No one can tell you what to do.... but if I was you I'd ask the mods to close the thread (not delete just close) after making an apology for a frustrated but rude comment. Make a cuppa. Take a breather. Slow down your thoughts before you write any posts.

I hope you do this as there are some good threads to join. There's also good threads on health issues and supportive people

What she says OP.

Seriously, take some advice, a proper apology for causing any offence, and then come back and be nice in other threads. It can be a fun site.

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By *rRiosMan over a year ago

dublin

I got verified yesterday and I woke up this morning and there was six women in my front garden cooing and batting their eyelashes at me! I had to shoo them away with a brush to get the post!

Real talk though, best advise I can give is be patient, manage expectations, manage your profile better, check your status and ask yourself how a stranger would react if you said such a thing, know your audience and who you are trying to attract, don’t make forum posts that can be easily misinterpreted.

The forums can be a good place to display your personality without hitting anyone inbox.

Best of luck

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What she says OP.

Seriously, take some advice, a proper apology for causing any offence, and then come back and be nice in other threads. It can be a fun site."

Ah, I see you have apologised.

Good bloke.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Have you been here before or are you brand new OP?I'm a noobie "

Being a boobie but let's get a scooby on the fab do's (ies and donts)

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By *ustBoWoman over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

And there it is as per usual the guy who struggles on here had to throw a slur towards someone he may not fancy. This is exactly the reason people don't get replies.It has nothing to do with anyone being new ,but all to do with attitude.

Good luck on your journey. I think you may need it.

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

I hope you do this as there are some good threads to join. There's also good threads on health issues and supportive people

"
appreciate you lots for that , my health is nearly back to when I boxed and I can't complain , I can't ask for the thread to be closed coz I apologised and if people can't see that it's their problem I'm not gonna hide it it was just a bad choice of words and if certain people take offence they might need to look at themselves,they will get ignored ,I wernt refering to anyone and I've read worse in some women's profiles tbh

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman over a year ago

Wherever

I was going to offer a sympathy shag but I’m a bit worried now I might not be OP’s type

(worried oink!)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I was going to offer a sympathy shag but I’m a bit worried now I might not be OP’s type

(worried oink!)"

Come and oink with me

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By *he ass man 666Man over a year ago

paradise city

"I was going to offer a sympathy shag but I’m a bit worried now I might not be OP’s type

(worried oink!)"

Don’t you’ve got problem there love

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I hope you do this as there are some good threads to join. There's also good threads on health issues and supportive people

appreciate you lots for that , my health is nearly back to when I boxed and I can't complain , I can't ask for the thread to be closed coz I apologised and if people can't see that it's their problem I'm not gonna hide it it was just a bad choice of words and if certain people take offence they might need to look at themselves,they will get ignored ,I wernt refering to anyone and I've read worse in some women's profiles tbh"

Closing means its still viewable to show the apology.

I tried and appreciate that you appreciate

But then still carried on shovelling

I wish you good luck OP

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By *erri_kissesTV/TS over a year ago

Islington

"Have you been here before or are you brand new OP?I'm a noobie "

I hate to be cynical but this is a very short space of time within which to have learnt of a supposed ‘stigma’

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By *ealitybitesMan over a year ago

Belfast

I hope you do this as there are some good threads to join. There's also good threads on health issues and supportive people

So it's other people's fault if they feel offended by your choice of words?

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman over a year ago

Wherever

"I was going to offer a sympathy shag but I’m a bit worried now I might not be OP’s type

(worried oink!)

Come and oink with me

Double oink!

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

Good luck on your journey. I think you may need it. "
you obviously ain't read the thread properly when I apologised I said twice I wernt refering to anyone and it was a bad choice of words

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By *lan157Man over a year ago

a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex

Well done on losing 5 stone OP .With all this advice hopefully you have now read and re read the FAQ and understand why references to "manners" are not helpful. You should not expect your messages to always be read . You must expect most messages to go unanswered . Women just do not have the time to reply to everything and they have very valid reasons for not doing so which you will learn about in due course when you have followed reoccurring forum posts on the subject. Go to socials that are advertised on here instead of messaging .It will be more productive .

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By *rRiosMan over a year ago

dublin

"I was going to offer a sympathy shag but I’m a bit worried now I might not be OP’s type

(worried oink!)"
Pigs are one of my favorite animals and my goldfish just died…

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By *ebauchedDeviantsPt2Couple over a year ago

Cumbria

What choice of words should you have chosen if not ‘fat pig’, OP?

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

"Well done on losing 5 stone OP .With all this advice hopefully you have now read and re read the FAQ and understand why references to "manners" are not helpful. You should not expect your messages to always be read . You must expect most messages to go unanswered . Women just do not have the time to reply to everything and they have very valid reasons for not doing so which you will learn about in due course when you have followed reoccurring forum posts on the subject. Go to socials that are advertised on here instead of messaging .It will be more productive . "
I think that's a fair and valid point dude , but it's hard to get kicked in the balls after trying to think of something original to say and type it without sounding like a simp or someone creepy then either get a response that's rude or a bit humiliating or nothing at all

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By *lan157Man over a year ago

a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex

"Well done on losing 5 stone OP .With all this advice hopefully you have now read and re read the FAQ and understand why references to "manners" are not helpful. You should not expect your messages to always be read . You must expect most messages to go unanswered . Women just do not have the time to reply to everything and they have very valid reasons for not doing so which you will learn about in due course when you have followed reoccurring forum posts on the subject. Go to socials that are advertised on here instead of messaging .It will be more productive . I think that's a fair and valid point dude , but it's hard to get kicked in the balls after trying to think of something original to say and type it without sounding like a simp or someone creepy then either get a response that's rude or a bit humiliating or nothing at all "

Clearly people should not be rude or humiliating in any reply unless provoked but don't be disheartened by non replies . There are better ways .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well done on losing 5 stone OP .With all this advice hopefully you have now read and re read the FAQ and understand why references to "manners" are not helpful. You should not expect your messages to always be read . You must expect most messages to go unanswered . Women just do not have the time to reply to everything and they have very valid reasons for not doing so which you will learn about in due course when you have followed reoccurring forum posts on the subject. Go to socials that are advertised on here instead of messaging .It will be more productive . I think that's a fair and valid point dude , but it's hard to get kicked in the balls after trying to think of something original to say and type it without sounding like a simp or someone creepy then either get a response that's rude or a bit humiliating or nothing at all "

We have all been there ! You get used to it and come to expect no response

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

"Well done on losing 5 stone OP .With all this advice hopefully you have now read and re read the FAQ and understand why references to "manners" are not helpful. You should not expect your messages to always be read . You must expect most messages to go unanswered . Women just do not have the time to reply to everything and they have very valid reasons for not doing so which you will learn about in due course when you have followed reoccurring forum posts on the subject. Go to socials that are advertised on here instead of messaging .It will be more productive . I think that's a fair and valid point dude , but it's hard to get kicked in the balls after trying to think of something original to say and type it without sounding like a simp or someone creepy then either get a response that's rude or a bit humiliating or nothing at all

We have all been there ! You get used to it and come to expect no response "
cheers con I appreciate you dude

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Good luck on your journey. I think you may need it. you obviously ain't read the thread properly when I apologised I said twice I wernt refering to anyone and it was a bad choice of words "

Bad choice of words is putting it mildly

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You remind me of, me.

I'm a 43 year old clueless Virgin. It's obviously womenkind's fault they can't see beyond my faults.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Have PM you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Dude, just be kind, be polite and take a no response as a no thank you and move on. It’s a numbers game, a bit like job hunting. Nothing is guaranteed, you’re not owed anything. Be the best version of yourself, be positive and someone will eventually take to you.

Chill and have a beer

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"im dave and i never said such a thing,,"

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

"Dude, just be kind, be polite and take a no response as a no thank you and move on. It’s a numbers game, a bit like job hunting. Nothing is guaranteed, you’re not owed anything. Be the best version of yourself, be positive and someone will eventually take to you.

Chill and have a beer"
thank you amigo will do

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By *hePerkyPumpkinTV/TS over a year ago

Bristol

"I was going to offer a sympathy shag but I’m a bit worried now I might not be OP’s type

(worried oink!)

Come and oink with me

Did anyone else find the Oinks strangely arousing?

Or was it just me?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Chill and have a beerthank you amigo will do "

Have a good night.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’m sorry you’ve had a health scare and well done for loosing weight. Also sorry to hear it’s been a long time without a hug, that’s not good for anyone’s mental health.

As others have said - look at other profiles and get a sense of how to improve. Take some nice pics. Also, you sound like you want pity in your profile - women don’t want to hang out with men who feel sorry for themselves, they want a laugh and enjoy themselves

I’d also reset expectations. This is not a sex on demand site. No one owns anyone anything on here. Not a reply, not sex - nothing. As you will see in other threads, women get a lot of messages - and we’ve learned that if we send a polite no we often get harassed and abused.

As in fact your thread is an example of. Lastly, perhaps rethink your attitude towards women - very few people if any is going to feel positive to someone who starts using insulting language, even if it is from frustration. What would you be like in the bedroom if she says no to you, have a tantrum?!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Who are ripped with massive cocks….

"Get used to the fact that women who don't look too good themselves will want to meet only hot guys....:D"

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By *agic johnson OP Man over a year ago

morden

"I’m sorry you’ve had a health scare and well done for loosing weight. Also sorry to hear it’s been a long time without a hug, that’s not good for anyone’s mental health.

"
you need to read the thread properly

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It was obvious you weren’t referring to anyone in particular but unfortunately that won’t stop the FAB pile on buddy.

And yes I’ve read plenty worse comments that have been conveniently brushed over.

Welcome to FAB

I hope you do this as there are some good threads to join. There's also good threads on health issues and supportive people

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I was going to offer a sympathy shag but I’m a bit worried now I might not be OP’s type

(worried oink!)

Come and oink with me

Did anyone else find the Oinks strangely arousing?

Or was it just me?

Oink

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By *ealitybitesMan over a year ago

Belfast

Tag teams are so cool aren't they?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There are literally thousands of threads on the forum of men asking the exact same question you've asked. Do a forum search, read some of said threads, along with reading the site FAQs, and follow the advice given.

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By *weetiepie99Woman over a year ago

cardiff

"Tag teams are so cool aren't they?"

People trying to be funny i think, but not succeeding

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Go on forums and wind people up not saying that gets you verified but it takes away the boredom

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By *hunky ChefMan over a year ago

Norwich

***

Stigma is for being a single man.

Welcome to Fab.

At least you are 5'10", so you have the most fancied minimum height.

Should change the athletic body type to average in my opinion.

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By *hunky ChefMan over a year ago

Norwich

"Go on forums and wind people up not saying that gets you verified but it takes away the boredom

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’m sorry you’ve had a health scare and well done for loosing weight. Also sorry to hear it’s been a long time without a hug, that’s not good for anyone’s mental health.

you need to read the thread properly"

Him, I did?! And wrote you quite a nice reply. Honestly dude, you are your own worst enemy it seems.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS over a year ago

Central

You're fine OP, you're experiencing what all new men here go through. Making realistic expectations is essential, so that you stay upbeat. Think again about what it's realistic to expect, as a new single man amongst thousands of swingers here.

Sure, it's not what you want. It's great that you expect great things. But it needs patience and a lot of hard graft. You can get to socials, to meet others and get verified. You can visit clubs too, for similar reasons.

But, it will take time. Keep using the forum, to get a feel for people here.

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By *luttyLaylaWoman over a year ago

North West

I don’t think there is a clique.

Reading the FAQ’s would defo be beneficial. It’s not rude to not reply. A no reply = a polite no thanks.

You’ve been here 2 weeks, people don’t expect veris overnight. That being said, I only care for my safety.

If you’re serious about meeting search the forums for club nights and organised socials. You’ll meet people and get verified.

No one think they are on a pedestal and I think it’s important to manage your expectations

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By *luttyLaylaWoman over a year ago

North West

"Who are ripped with massive cocks….

Get used to the fact that women who don't look too good themselves will want to meet only hot guys....:D"

Surely you can only blame the “hot” guys for meeting them then?

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By *evonrobMan over a year ago

Kingsbridge

"Is there a stigma to being new?

Do you think after a certain amount of time elapses that the floodgates open and they all fly at you flaps akimbo?

What are your expectations of the site OP? And have you read the FAQs?"

Ha ha ha ha! Brilliant post. “Flaps akimbo”. That’s a visual I just won’t be able to get out of my mind now. I’m not new either!

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By *orny-DJMan over a year ago

Leigh-on-Sea

You've been here 2 weeks.

What were your expectations on joining the site?

That all you need do is knock up a quick profile and be fighting them off with a shity stick by lunchtime?

I've got news for you sunshine.

Pink isn't well he stayed back at the hotel...

Oops, brain went off on a tangent.

Most single men on here wait up to a year to get their first meet, so you might want to realign ypur ecpectations

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By *ebauchedDeviantsPt2Couple over a year ago

Cumbria

"Who are ripped with massive cocks….

Get used to the fact that women who don't look too good themselves will want to meet only hot guys....:D

Surely you can only blame the “hot” guys for meeting them then?

ha "

“No incredibly hot guy, I’m not meeting you this evening because out of principle I’m meeting someone I’m not particularly attracted to and comes across as really bitter because he can’t get any meets.”

What world do these people live in?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Stop moaning

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Stop moaning"

^^ most definitely this ^^

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By *umblecutMan over a year ago

Finchley

"Get used to the fact that women who don't look too good themselves will want to meet only hot guys....:D

Ohhh, you are brave.

I am pulling up an armchair

Wait! Don't start just yet. Let me get some popcorn

Budge up, I wanna watch this

Of course! Always happy to make space for you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Best advice I can give you is just relax and stop trying to force it to happen, read profiles carefully and send messages related to maybe a Mutual interest, in the forums engage with people and build some friendships, also be yourself but sometimes that’s the reason the guy is not getting any meets and complaining about it !!

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By *hagTonightMan over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

[Removed by poster at 26/11/23 15:12:30]

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By *hagTonightMan over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

Patency is the key

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By *ennyleeeWoman over a year ago

Southampton

[Removed by poster at 26/11/23 15:26:12]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don’t think there is a clique.

Reading the FAQ’s would defo be beneficial. It’s not rude to not reply. A no reply = a polite no thanks. …. "

It’s not polite.

I agree. It’s a NO and should be taken that way! but where did you ever EVER get taught ignoring someone was polite?

I wish FAB (or the people here) would stop excusing that and own the fact it’s just easier.

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By *ackformore100Man over a year ago

Tin town

"I don’t think there is a clique.

Reading the FAQ’s would defo be beneficial. It’s not rude to not reply. A no reply = a polite no thanks. ….

It’s not polite.

I agree. It’s a NO and should be taken that way! but where did you ever EVER get taught ignoring someone was polite?

I wish FAB (or the people here) would stop excusing that and own the fact it’s just easier.

He knows

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By *ebauchedDeviantsPt2Couple over a year ago

Cumbria

"I don’t think there is a clique.

Reading the FAQ’s would defo be beneficial. It’s not rude to not reply. A no reply = a polite no thanks. ….

It’s not polite.

I agree. It’s a NO and should be taken that way! but where did you ever EVER get taught ignoring someone was polite?

I wish FAB (or the people here) would stop excusing that and own the fact it’s just easier.

It’s a lot easier to give a polite no response when you aren’t dealing with a ton of messages every day, and there isn’t a significant chance of getting either a “but why aren’t you interested in me? If you’d just meet me face to face you would change your mind” or “you’re fat/ugly/a cunt/a bitch anyway” if you do send a polite no.

Yes it’s not all men but it’s enough of them, and you should maybe focus your ire on the men who ruin it for the rest of you, rather than the women and couples who are on the receiving end of the abuse.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don’t think there is a clique.

Reading the FAQ’s would defo be beneficial. It’s not rude to not reply. A no reply = a polite no thanks. ….

It’s not polite.

I agree. It’s a NO and should be taken that way! but where did you ever EVER get taught ignoring someone was polite?

I wish FAB (or the people here) would stop excusing that and own the fact it’s just easier.

That whole post is the reason why ive got my filters set to 99 right now

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don’t think there is a clique.

Reading the FAQ’s would defo be beneficial. It’s not rude to not reply. A no reply = a polite no thanks. ….

It’s not polite.

I agree. It’s a NO and should be taken that way! but where did you ever EVER get taught ignoring someone was polite?

I wish FAB (or the people here) would stop excusing that and own the fact it’s just easier.

That wasn’t my point.

My point is the fact everyone that says it’s a ‘polite no’ is getting it wrong. It’s not.

A polite no is exactly as you describe.

I’m not going to defend or having a go at the assholes that throw that polite reply in the bin and show who they realy are, they can fuck it up for themselves, not me. How do I know who they are?

But when I read this ignore is a polite no, I will always shout ‘bullshit!’ It’s NOT polite. It’s just a no, a rejection. And i can own that, just not the false branding of it. I’m being picky, I know about the wording. But maybe it would help the people rejecting appreciate men are getting ignored, and not feeling the good vibe that swinging is supposed to be.

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman over a year ago

Somewhere else

"Is there a stigma to being new?

Do you think after a certain amount of time elapses that the floodgates open and they all fly at you flaps akimbo?

What are your expectations of the site OP? And have you read the FAQs?"

FLAPS AKIMBO! ROTFLMAO

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman over a year ago

Somewhere else

"Seriously 2 weeks

Women are here of their own accord, not just laid around with legs open waiting to be filled by anyone passing

Speak for yourself - my legs are always open.

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