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Is negativity a deliberate thing?
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On here it could be a way of keeping messages down but is it good for you to be so negative? I find positivity is so much better, a smile as you walk past someone in the street begets a smile or a good morning, a happy demeanor is catching don't you think?  |
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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I’d much rather talk to someone positive, some people can really bring your vibe down.
But, you can’t be positive all the time, some things in life are hard, so I get it, and I’d rather people be honest where they are, I can deal with that too.
Someone with a sunny outlook are awesome to talk to.  |
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Nope. A smile means people think it's ok to stop you and talk to you when you've got stuff to do, and if I try to fake a smile I end up looking like a lunatic. My face does what my face does, and if people don't like it they should mind their own business.
Besides, filters do wonders at keeping messages down. |
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I agree that negative nellies are draining but permanently positive people can be equally so.
I tend not to trust those who are always positive because they are often hiding something.
That could be their own true feelings or they use their positivity to disarm others and have an ulterior motive.
I'm aware that this reads as a negative attitude towards positivity but I think of it as more of a cautious one especially when it involves strangers who are trying to make a good impression and feel the need to be something they're not. |
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I would much rather have someone be negative if that's how they feel, than fake positivity for the sake of other people.
Marge forced positivity on poor Lisa, and it just left her more miserable on the inside |
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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"I agree that negative nellies are draining but permanently positive people can be equally so.
I tend not to trust those who are always positive because they are often hiding something.
That could be their own true feelings or they use their positivity to disarm others and have an ulterior motive.
I'm aware that this reads as a negative attitude towards positivity but I think of it as more of a cautious one especially when it involves strangers who are trying to make a good impression and feel the need to be something they're not. "
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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"I would much rather have someone be negative if that's how they feel, than fake positivity for the sake of other people.
Marge forced positivity on poor Lisa, and it just left her more miserable on the inside"
Slipping in a Simpsons analogy … like your style |
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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Back to the old everything in moderation clichés……
No one can be happy all the time, but (hopefully) not everyone is grumpy or negative all the time .. find the best middle ground you can in life.. |
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If that's how they want to spend their time then its up to them. I try to avoid constantly negative Nancy's as much as possible, as I have a mainly sunny positive outlook and I feel drained after an encounter with one |
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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"If that's how they want to spend their time then its up to them. I try to avoid constantly negative Nancy's as much as possible, as I have a mainly sunny positive outlook and I feel drained after an encounter with one"
I love to to be drained after an encounter ….. |
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I think it’s good to be authentic in tough times & not trying to put on a brave face for the sake of others. But constant negativity as a choice is draining on those around you.
Even worse, people where everything is somebody else’s fault, and there is never any solution. |
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By *eliWoman 52 weeks ago
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There's a balance to be had.
As much as constant positivity is false, draining and a load of bollocks, so can constant negativity. Both sides of the coin can become a charade, an exaggerated facade in order to stop people seeing who they really are. An identity without actually having one.
I don't think people should have to smile. Nor do I think they shouldn't have to. There's enough space in the world to not interact with those you don't want to without asking them to change. |
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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".......I find positivity is so much better, a smile as you walk past someone in the street begets a smile or a good morning, a happy demeanor is catching don't you think? "
Seeing as the OP is about positive interactions as opposed to ones well-being and disposition, I agree that in general, positive interactions tend to be uplifting.
How many people can't be perked up, even momentarily, when they see or play with an exuberant puppy or kitten?
M
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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"If that's how they want to spend their time then its up to them. I try to avoid constantly negative Nancy's as much as possible, as I have a mainly sunny positive outlook and I feel drained after an encounter with one"
I’m with you. Much nicer being around the cheerful souls  |
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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".......I find positivity is so much better, a smile as you walk past someone in the street begets a smile or a good morning, a happy demeanor is catching don't you think?
Seeing as the OP is about positive interactions as opposed to ones well-being and disposition, I agree that in general, positive interactions tend to be uplifting.
How many people can't be perked up, even momentarily, when they see or play with an exuberant puppy or kitten?
M
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But puppies and kittens are nice. They don't have ulterior motives and aren't putting on the "hey I'm nice" facade whilst being a complete bitch behind your back.
The most genuinely nice people I know aren't just happy and nice all the time. |
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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".......
But puppies and kittens are nice. They don't have ulterior motives and aren't putting on the "hey I'm nice" facade whilst being a complete bitch behind your back.
…."
I’ve been bitten twice from a dog, you’d think I’d learn to not go near them wouldn’t you?  |
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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".......
But puppies and kittens are nice. They don't have ulterior motives and aren't putting on the "hey I'm nice" facade whilst being a complete bitch behind your back.
….
I’ve been bitten twice from a dog, you’d think I’d learn to not go near them wouldn’t you? "
I'm like this with men. We never learn! |
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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".......
But puppies and kittens are nice. They don't have ulterior motives and aren't putting on the "hey I'm nice" facade whilst being a complete bitch behind your back.
….
I’ve been bitten twice from a dog, you’d think I’d learn to not go near them wouldn’t you?
I'm like this with men. We never learn!"
You’ll do alright. |
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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"But puppies and kittens are nice. They don't have ulterior motives and aren't putting on the "hey I'm nice" facade whilst being a complete bitch behind your back.
The most genuinely nice people I know aren't just happy and nice all the time. "
Oh, I'm sorry about that. That's horrible. I wouldn't say that's a positive interaction then.
I was thinking more along the lines of casual interactions. It's nicer to come across someone who'll offer a smile than a grumpy git who tells you to get out of his way, let's say.
M |
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I prefer to be around positive folk, but I like the odd dose of negativity too. The world isn't always sunshine and smiles, sometimes you think 'fuck people, leave me alone', and it's good to let that out in your own way rather than bottle it up.
I'm generally positive, 90% of the time at least, I feel I'm at my best when I'm upbeat. When I'm not upbeat I'll stay away from people, or I'll not post on Fab on those occasions say, if I've had a bad day or something. Rather than appearing like a miserable sod and bringing others down, I prefer to get my mind right before I interact with people again.
On here I think some people present a negative outlook to keep people at arms lengths, or maybe to seem edgy and stand out from the sea of chipper people saying 'good morning' to an online stranger, for example. There are also some people who are just negative most of the time by nature.
Either way, there's good and bad in everyone and the world would be pretty stale if everyone acted the same all the time.
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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".......
But puppies and kittens are nice. They don't have ulterior motives and aren't putting on the "hey I'm nice" facade whilst being a complete bitch behind your back.
….
I’ve been bitten twice from a dog, you’d think I’d learn to not go near them wouldn’t you? "
....but puppies though, Woody, puppies. They're just irresistible, aren't they?  |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS 52 weeks ago
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I know a couple of people who are very negative.
One, I think uses it as a self defence mechanism. If he never opens up, then he can't be hurt.
The other, I've no idea, but all they do is share bad memes and their content makes all of their family and friends look as if they just cause them problems.  |
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".......
But puppies and kittens are nice. They don't have ulterior motives and aren't putting on the "hey I'm nice" facade whilst being a complete bitch behind your back.
….
I’ve been bitten twice from a dog, you’d think I’d learn to not go near them wouldn’t you? "
I don't go near them althougb i met a really nice one the other day just licked my hand no noise, just seemed happy |
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If someone being negative, then I might ask what's wrong and try to help them.
Better than turn it to some kind of bullying, and try to fit it on people you don't like.
They might be dealing with loss and depression.
That's better than being naive or pretending to be perfect, so you will be popular or get laid.
Those "Why are you grumpy?" people taking it far often.
I might say it as a joke, but I won't tell someone I hardly know.
They might have lost someone, got bad news from the doctor....etc.
I actually heard it when my sister died.
Wasn't much of an apology, just silence.
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Actions speak louder than words.
I had a waitress Rosie.
She put a smile on my face on the worst days.
It was what she's done mostly.
Not just saying she is positive and calling people negative.
There's a fine line between being positive or insensitive. |
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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I don't find anything in excess is... better. whether negative or positive. The first one makes me wonder what happened to them to cause that pain, the second makes me question how genuine it is. Neither seems a good path.
T. |
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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"I don't have the energy to always be positive (especially on here most of the time) x"
There are wrong people and right people. The right ones keep my pecker up. |
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"I don't have the energy to always be positive (especially on here most of the time) x
There are wrong people and right people. The right ones keep my pecker up. "
The right ones are what keep me coming back...but they are getting less and less x |
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It gets a bit boring when they're negative all of the time. Like surely you can't be that fucking miserable, every day. It's a bit sad that feel the need to create that kind of character.
We all have ups and downs, which most people see to reflect, which comes over as more genuine. |
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By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
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"I don't have the energy to always be positive (especially on here most of the time) x
There are wrong people and right people. The right ones keep my pecker up.
The right ones are what keep me coming back...but they are getting less and less x"
That’s what I thought. … |
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