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Traditional marriage and
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
where do you think it might be in say 50 years' time? We are experiencing more divorces and separations, fewer people follow the traditional path of getting married, then having children and it seems to me that family life and society are very different from what I experienced when I was young.
I am not criticising anybody for a chosen lifestyle - I am asking what people believe may happen regarding relationships, marriage and families? |
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By *aris23Woman
over a year ago
France |
Well my own thoughts of the future of my family often give me reason to think a similar thing.
Look back 50 years and people only met each other at the village hop or in the cafe. Rarely did they meet those from a great distance as transport wasn't so available. They met, married and had children - in that order. Women mainly stayed at home with the children and kept house and they were kept very busy as everything was done manually. Women were more involved in community activities and thus talked through problems with each other. The man went to work to support the family. Divorce was not an easy option as there were not the social security benefits and housing to help them out. Shame from ones peers was not something anyone wanted experience so people tended to 'make the effort'.
Fast forward to now - the internet has brought people within touching distance therefore allowing those who are dissatisfied at home the options of meeting others. Social housing, welfare benefits, childcare options for working women, gizmos and gadgets galore in the home leave more leisure time and divorce is seems to be something to celebrate rather than to regret. Men can leave relationships in the knowledge that the state is supporting their families with CSA contribution. People no longer support each other in the community and rely on charitable organisations and helplines for counselling with relationship problems.
Fast forward 50 years? Marriage will probably not exist, it will be looked upon as an archaic tradition. People will always pair up - procreation in some form or another will always be necessary for the human race to continue - but will be less in the way of traditional relationships and more of the free love lifestyle (are swingers ahead of the times already). The world will likely be even more computerised and motorised and more people will work via ever shrinking in size mobile gadgets.
Who really knows - did our parents ever imagine their children would be living the lifestyle we do today? How can we predict how our own children will be living in 50 years time? Will they ever be parents themselves or will the future generations be spawned in laboratories and released into 'society' when fully programmed to function.
Feel free to disagree...it is only my own ramblings! lol  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think less and less people will get married in the future, i know loads of people no who have been together 10, 15, 20 years and never got married, people dont see the need for it anymore, in years gone by it was seen as shameful to have sex or live with someone without being married, now days noone cares, you can love someone without saying 'i do' infront of everyone, the commitment is supposed to be for yourself not for your whole family
personally i dont see the need for it, you can love and be committed to someone just as much without the piece of paper |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"
Fast forward 50 years? Marriage will probably not exist, it will be looked upon as an archaic tradition. People will always pair up - procreation in some form or another will always be necessary for the human race to continue - but will be less in the way of traditional relationships and more of the free love lifestyle (are swingers ahead of the times already). The world will likely be even more computerised and motorised and more people will work via ever shrinking in size mobile gadgets.
Who really knows - did our parents ever imagine their children would be living the lifestyle we do today? How can we predict how our own children will be living in 50 years time? Will they ever be parents themselves or will the future generations be spawned in laboratories and released into 'society' when fully programmed to function.
Feel free to disagree...it is only my own ramblings! lol "
Apologies for cutting an important part of your post - I actually think every bit of your post is very valid. I wonder whether marriage will still exist or whether people will talk about Big Weddings as something that happened... as we talk about Victorian times? |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"I think less and less people will get married in the future, i know loads of people no who have been together 10, 15, 20 years and never got married, people dont see the need for it anymore, in years gone by it was seen as shameful to have sex or live with someone without being married, now days noone cares, you can love someone without saying 'i do' infront of everyone, the commitment is supposed to be for yourself not for your whole family
personally i dont see the need for it, you can love and be committed to someone just as much without the piece of paper"
I used to think that it was important when you have children... I dont anymore as marriage does not seem to keep people together really, does it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Honestly...I think if there were tax breaks for being married again more people would consider it!! With fewer people growing up in traditional families I do think marriage will continue to decline, but I'm not sure it will ever disappear as those who follow a faith will most likely still want to get married in front of their church (or version of it) |
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By *r mrs pCouple
over a year ago
taunton |
"where do you think it might be in say 50 years' time? We are experiencing more divorces and separations, fewer people follow the traditional path of getting married, then having children and it seems to me that family life and society are very different from what I experienced when I was young.
I am not criticising anybody for a chosen lifestyle - I am asking what people believe may happen regarding relationships, marriage and families? "
We have been married for 32 years, in 50 years time we cant see many peope bothering, too expensive/its just a bit of paper/cost too much/rather have wide screen tv etc etc.family life seems to be dissapearing.
 |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
Goldilocks and Mr MrsP... I am looking at the way people spend fortunes on weddings even against the backdrop of a bad recession. Then after the wedding is over there seems to be that heightened expectation of a great life together when in reality most people have already lived together for some time. Then follows the reality check ... and disappointment maybe. While all this goes on... many are still paying off huge debts accumulated over the wedding... |
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By *r mrs pCouple
over a year ago
taunton |
"Goldilocks and Mr MrsP... I am looking at the way people spend fortunes on weddings even against the backdrop of a bad recession. Then after the wedding is over there seems to be that heightened expectation of a great life together when in reality most people have already lived together for some time. Then follows the reality check ... and disappointment maybe. While all this goes on... many are still paying off huge debts accumulated over the wedding... "
Or the parents are left with tje bill. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Goldilocks and Mr MrsP... I am looking at the way people spend fortunes on weddings even against the backdrop of a bad recession. Then after the wedding is over there seems to be that heightened expectation of a great life together when in reality most people have already lived together for some time. Then follows the reality check ... and disappointment maybe. While all this goes on... many are still paying off huge debts accumulated over the wedding... "
Too many people focus on a wedding and not on the marriage...and then there is this huge anticlimax as the fairytale comes to and end and the reality sets in. The marriages I've seen fail have generally been the ones with the most extravagant weddings...those who get wed within their budgets do tend to be happier |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well my own thoughts of the future of my family often give me reason to think a similar thing.
Look back 50 years and people only met each other at the village hop or in the cafe. Rarely did they meet those from a great distance as transport wasn't so available. They met, married and had children - in that order. Women mainly stayed at home with the children and kept house and they were kept very busy as everything was done manually. Women were more involved in community activities and thus talked through problems with each other. The man went to work to support the family. Divorce was not an easy option as there were not the social security benefits and housing to help them out. Shame from ones peers was not something anyone wanted experience so people tended to 'make the effort'.
Fast forward to now - the internet has brought people within touching distance therefore allowing those who are dissatisfied at home the options of meeting others. Social housing, welfare benefits, childcare options for working women, gizmos and gadgets galore in the home leave more leisure time and divorce is seems to be something to celebrate rather than to regret. Men can leave relationships in the knowledge that the state is supporting their families with CSA contribution. People no longer support each other in the community and rely on charitable organisations and helplines for counselling with relationship problems.
Fast forward 50 years? Marriage will probably not exist, it will be looked upon as an archaic tradition. People will always pair up - procreation in some form or another will always be necessary for the human race to continue - but will be less in the way of traditional relationships and more of the free love lifestyle (are swingers ahead of the times already). The world will likely be even more computerised and motorised and more people will work via ever shrinking in size mobile gadgets.
Who really knows - did our parents ever imagine their children would be living the lifestyle we do today? How can we predict how our own children will be living in 50 years time? Will they ever be parents themselves or will the future generations be spawned in laboratories and released into 'society' when fully programmed to function.
Feel free to disagree...it is only my own ramblings! lol "
While I agree with what you have said the CSA do not contribute and imo one of the worst run government agencies which is in need of a massive shake up. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Goldilocks and Mr MrsP... I am looking at the way people spend fortunes on weddings even against the backdrop of a bad recession. Then after the wedding is over there seems to be that heightened expectation of a great life together when in reality most people have already lived together for some time. Then follows the reality check ... and disappointment maybe. While all this goes on... many are still paying off huge debts accumulated over the wedding...
Or the parents are left with tje bill. "
Absolutely. It just seems odd... I am not even thinking of the Big Fat Gyspy Wedding style... just an ordinary wedding is so expensive, and not wanting to be cynical, it is for the one day... and then for so many the let down begins in the form of reality, of work, bills, children.
I mean I would do it all over again as despite being divorced now... I had my kids and they are really cool.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The thought of loving someone enough to marry them scares the hell out of me.
I don't think many will still get married in 50 years time it seems less and less get married now.
There are 7 children in my family all adults and only 3 of them have been married,yet my mother was one of 7 and all but one of those were married at our ages. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"I personally believe in the sanctity of marriage and I for one hope that it will remain a solid union that is believed in and cherished.
"
Do you think it will under the pressure on the church as an institution? |
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i was watchin holloaks the other day (too lazy to find the remote control lol) and tony was getting divorced for like the 5th time and it made me wonder if the soaps are partly responsible for the throw away nature of marriage these days.
in every soap people break up and get back together at the drop of a hat to please the writers |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Goldilocks and Mr MrsP... I am looking at the way people spend fortunes on weddings even against the backdrop of a bad recession. Then after the wedding is over there seems to be that heightened expectation of a great life together when in reality most people have already lived together for some time. Then follows the reality check ... and disappointment maybe. While all this goes on... many are still paying off huge debts accumulated over the wedding...
Too many people focus on a wedding and not on the marriage...and then there is this huge anticlimax as the fairytale comes to and end and the reality sets in. The marriages I've seen fail have generally been the ones with the most extravagant weddings...those who get wed within their budgets do tend to be happier"
Very very true! Seems like the focus is on the glamour and perhaps even one upmanship? |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Well we are getting hitched later this year, and we both hope we will still be together when we are old and grey! "
Ooops, I apologise - this thread was not intended to make you feel bad - as I said just I would do it all over again, too. I was just curious what people thought might happen in years to come.
Hope you have a great day and a good life together! |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"The thought of loving someone enough to marry them scares the hell out of me.
I don't think many will still get married in 50 years time it seems less and less get married now.
There are 7 children in my family all adults and only 3 of them have been married,yet my mother was one of 7 and all but one of those were married at our ages."
Do you think it is the idea of "being together for ever... until we die " kind of thing that is so scary? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Got married in 1980, had our first child in 1983, second in 1985.
Still married and only the other day looked through the wedding album.
The only down side was our kids were the only ones that had mum & dad still living together by the time they left school.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I personally believe in the sanctity of marriage and I for one hope that it will remain a solid union that is believed in and cherished.
Do you think it will under the pressure on the church as an institution? "
No I don't think many even get married these days for reasons of faith.
That is why in this ever changing modern world I hope that going into the future marriage will still be considered as a union and not necessary as now to even be in church |
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How do you define a "traditional" marriage? In a fairytale world it was a man and woman who where virgins and had never lived together and gone down the aisle in white. I dont think i know a single soul that has ever had that kind of traditional marriage.
My mum and dad where married in 1962 my mum was pregnant and they got married in a register office and it was a big to do about it all.
I got married in 1990 pregnant and in a register office and noone blinked an eye.
My sister who lives in a catholic country where they do tend to get married still lived with her husband before they where married.
Now adays you get people marrying once, twice, three times plus, lots of stepfamilies. Lots of people having children before they get married and i dont know anyone that hasnt lived with their partner before they got married.
You have same sex marriages and civil partnerships and noone bats an eye.
To me there is only one reason for marriage and that is financial security.
Blood/marriage relationships come before commonlaw relationships unless some kind of contract has been signed. Personally although i was married if i was that age now i dont think i would. Cant see any benefits that i had to being married that i would have had just living with him |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The thought of loving someone enough to marry them scares the hell out of me.
I don't think many will still get married in 50 years time it seems less and less get married now.
There are 7 children in my family all adults and only 3 of them have been married,yet my mother was one of 7 and all but one of those were married at our ages.
Do you think it is the idea of "being together for ever... until we die " kind of thing that is so scary?"
I do believe more and more people are commitment phobic these days, with so much choice and also so many I know do not work at a marriage or even take marriage seriously hence the fallout after the vows |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well we are getting hitched later this year, and we both hope we will still be together when we are old and grey! Ooops, I apologise - this thread was not intended to make you feel bad - as I said just I would do it all over again, too. I was just curious what people thought might happen in years to come.
Hope you have a great day and a good life together! "
Don't be silly, no need to apologise at all... And you haven't made us feel bad!
I can see getting married becoming a rarity in years to come, gone are the days where couple courted, got engaged, then married with children to follow.... And where people worked at their marriages instead of giving up at the first hurdle |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The thought of loving someone enough to marry them scares the hell out of me.
I don't think many will still get married in 50 years time it seems less and less get married now.
There are 7 children in my family all adults and only 3 of them have been married,yet my mother was one of 7 and all but one of those were married at our ages.
Do you think it is the idea of "being together for ever... until we die " kind of thing that is so scary?
I do believe more and more people are commitment phobic these days, with so much choice and also so many I know do not work at a marriage or even take marriage seriously hence the fallout after the vows"
Following on from that I think many get married for the wrong reasons these days and therefore of course it will end in divorce. |
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By *r mrs pCouple
over a year ago
taunton |
"Goldilocks and Mr MrsP... I am looking at the way people spend fortunes on weddings even against the backdrop of a bad recession. Then after the wedding is over there seems to be that heightened expectation of a great life together when in reality most people have already lived together for some time. Then follows the reality check ... and disappointment maybe. While all this goes on... many are still paying off huge debts accumulated over the wedding...
Or the parents are left with tje bill. Absolutely. It just seems odd... I am not even thinking of the Big Fat Gyspy Wedding style... just an ordinary wedding is so expensive, and not wanting to be cynical, it is for the one day... and then for so many the let down begins in the form of reality, of work, bills, children.
I mean I would do it all over again as despite being divorced now... I had my kids and they are really cool. "
Our 2 daughters have both said if/when they do get married they would not expect us to pay for it. (probably knowing we would still help )
 |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
Apologies for copying and pasting only bits of the original.. did not want to make it too long. Hope I did not misquote.
How do you define a "traditional" marriage? In a fairytale world it was a man and woman who where virgins and had never lived together and gone down the aisle in white. I dont think i know a single soul that has ever had that kind of traditional marriage.
Brilliant point - I agree there are so many untradtional marriages and relationships now, for a start same sex relationships are so much more common and out in the open. That is also why I am wondering about that concept of fairy tale weddings - it is still being bought at great expense - just look at wedding fayres.
My mum and dad where married in 1962 my mum was pregnant and they got married in a register office and it was a big to do about it all.
I got married in 1990 pregnant and in a register office and noone blinked an eye.
Haven times changed... absolutely !
To me there is only one reason for marriage and that is financial security.
ANd this is possibly no longer true for so many as job security is a concept of the past....?
. Cant see any benefits that i had to being married that i would have had just living with him |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Well we are getting hitched later this year, and we both hope we will still be together when we are old and grey! Ooops, I apologise - this thread was not intended to make you feel bad - as I said just I would do it all over again, too. I was just curious what people thought might happen in years to come.
Hope you have a great day and a good life together!
Don't be silly, no need to apologise at all... And you haven't made us feel bad!
I can see getting married becoming a rarity in years to come, gone are the days where couple courted, got engaged, then married with children to follow.... And where people worked at their marriages instead of giving up at the first hurdle "
That is another point, isnt it.. courtship has changed a lot. People get close and intimate (not just sexually) so quickly via pc, net, texts etc.. the old way of slowly getting to know a person seems to have changed big time. |
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"Goldilocks and Mr MrsP... I am looking at the way people spend fortunes on weddings even against the backdrop of a bad recession. Then after the wedding is over there seems to be that heightened expectation of a great life together when in reality most people have already lived together for some time. Then follows the reality check ... and disappointment maybe. While all this goes on... many are still paying off huge debts accumulated over the wedding... "
I used to work with a bloke who spent 20K on their wedding. They had lived together for a number of years and planned to have a family straight away. She got pregnant on the honeymoon. After the baby was born he used to moan about how he couldn't afford some of the things he used to. What he had paid for his wedding was more than most people earn in a year. Didn't make sense to me
Scarlett |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"
Following on from that I think many get married for the wrong reasons these days and therefore of course it will end in divorce."
Why do you think people are getting married today? What reasons have changed in your view? |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"
Our 2 daughters have both said if/when they do get married they would not expect us to pay for it. (probably knowing we would still help )
"
And even there things have changed, havent they? It used to be that the woman's parents paid for the wedding? Correct me if I am wrong - it is different where I was born. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Goldilocks and Mr MrsP... I am looking at the way people spend fortunes on weddings even against the backdrop of a bad recession. Then after the wedding is over there seems to be that heightened expectation of a great life together when in reality most people have already lived together for some time. Then follows the reality check ... and disappointment maybe. While all this goes on... many are still paying off huge debts accumulated over the wedding...
I used to work with a bloke who spent 20K on their wedding. They had lived together for a number of years and planned to have a family straight away. She got pregnant on the honeymoon. After the baby was born he used to moan about how he couldn't afford some of the things he used to. What he had paid for his wedding was more than most people earn in a year. Didn't make sense to me
Scarlett "
Prime example of what I am puzzled about...while I can kind of understand spending a certain amount on a lovely honeymoon... spending it on one day...has got to lead some people to some disappointment with what happens after? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Marraige over the Centuries has been for many different reasons, the idea of marraige for Love is fairly recent in the scheme of things.
I think these days more and more people are of the oppinion that Love doesn't necessarily last forever and that a person can love many people in their lifetime.
However, I don't think that marraige will become redundant, it means too many different things to different people.
To some it is security, to some it is sacrament, to some it is a symbol and to some it's a chance to throw a big fuckin' party 
Also, I think degrees of decadence and wotnot seems to come in cycles. I can't help but wonder if some HUGE event happened in the world if it wouldn't shift oppinions on something like marraige and perceptions of family values.
I dunno, things come 'n go don't they? |
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I had what i guess was an average wedding think there was about 75 people in total. It was all paid before, we didnt get any loans or debts.
I seriously cant see why some would get into debt for a fairytale wedding, great if you have saved and have the money. But to get into debt for one day?
A marriage doesnt consist of one day.
Actually im going to a wedding vow renewal in march as my friend has been married 25 years but they still lived together and had the kids first |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Following on from that I think many get married for the wrong reasons these days and therefore of course it will end in divorce.Why do you think people are getting married today? What reasons have changed in your view?"
We are getting married because its the last piece of the jigsaw puzzle, we have known each other many years and been through good times and awful times... So to us this is the last step to show our commitment to each other, we are not having a big fancy pants wedding, it will be small family affair with only the people we care for, and who care for us there!
Perhaps it's the romance of it all, all the media coverage of big weddings on the television? Is why some people get married without thinking the whole thing through |
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I think many girls still love the idea of the wedding fairytale. Ask what their ideal wedding day would be and they can give you every last detail, but ask them why they love their fella and I am often left with a long silence and a not very convincing reply.
I could write a book on the reasons why I love Rhett but have no intention of getting married |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Following on from that I think many get married for the wrong reasons these days and therefore of course it will end in divorce.Why do you think people are getting married today? What reasons have changed in your view?"
Peer pressure, woman believing they will be left on the shelf as it was, obligation, pressure from family, pressure from one half of the couple. Because they have kids together and it seems the right thing to do.
List is endless I suspect..
Personably I am "helping " 3 different friends who are currently on the edge of giving up on their marriages and it isn't easy, all 3 different reasons for wanting divorce. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Following on from that I think many get married for the wrong reasons these days and therefore of course it will end in divorce.Why do you think people are getting married today? What reasons have changed in your view?
We are getting married because its the last piece of the jigsaw puzzle, we have known each other many years and been through good times and awful times... So to us this is the last step to show our commitment to each other, we are not having a big fancy pants wedding, it will be small family affair with only the people we care for, and who care for us there!
Perhaps it's the romance of it all, all the media coverage of big weddings on the television? Is why some people get married without thinking the whole thing through "
This for sure, for love and romance and because you both want to, not because you need to. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Marraige over the Centuries has been for many different reasons, the idea of marraige for Love is fairly recent in the scheme of things.
I think these days more and more people are of the oppinion that Love doesn't necessarily last forever and that a person can love many people in their lifetime.
However, I don't think that marraige will become redundant, it means too many different things to different people.
To some it is security, to some it is sacrament, to some it is a symbol and to some it's a chance to throw a big fuckin' party
Also, I think degrees of decadence and wotnot seems to come in cycles. I can't help but wonder if some HUGE event happened in the world if it wouldn't shift oppinions on something like marraige and perceptions of family values.
I dunno, things come 'n go don't they? "
That is what I was wondering... people do no longer work in the same job a whole life time... and they do not seem to stay with the same partner forever. (Generalisation, I know.. not meant to be)
So our perception of values has changed as you said. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"
A marriage doesnt consist of one day.
Actually im going to a wedding vow renewal in march as my friend has been married 25 years but they still lived together and had the kids first"
I quite agree personally - it does not consists of one day... it is for .... however long.
Renewing marriage vows is another interesting one. I wonder why people do that... not saying it is a bad thing. Just curious. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"
Personably I am "helping " 3 different friends who are currently on the edge of giving up on their marriages and it isn't easy, all 3 different reasons for wanting divorce."
And I bet many people on here would echo that... have friends who are going through breakups. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"I would like to think I might get married again, some time in the future. I loved being married the first time. We only had a small wedding but it is etched into my mind. "
Mine was "comparatively" small, too and I remember it fondly (but then I get on well with my ex).
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A marriage doesnt consist of one day.
Actually im going to a wedding vow renewal in march as my friend has been married 25 years but they still lived together and had the kids first
I quite agree personally - it does not consists of one day... it is for .... however long.
Renewing marriage vows is another interesting one. I wonder why people do that... not saying it is a bad thing. Just curious."
I know why they are renewing theres but i dont know about other people |
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Oh and the fact i could never live with anyone not even jay. Are relationship is perfect simply because we dont live together. I love my own space and so does he, thankfully we both have the same thoughts about it.
Ive got a cat, thats enough for me |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Oh and the fact i could never live with anyone not even jay. Are relationship is perfect simply because we dont live together. I love my own space and so does he, thankfully we both have the same thoughts about it.
Ive got a cat, thats enough for me"
And as people are getting older, live longer adn remain fitter for longer... they spend more time with each other. I agree that not being together all the time can be healthy for a relationship! |
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"Got married in 1980, had our first child in 1983, second in 1985.
Still married and only the other day looked through the wedding album.
The only down side was our kids were the only ones that had mum & dad still living together by the time they left school. "
similar to us, married in 84 first one in 87 and then 90..
we also noticed the decline in our kids friends parents mariages as they grew up..
i think on the general question that if something, be that 'traditional' marriage or partnership or whatever works for cpl's and the kids are well loved etc then its a bit like horses for courses.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Marraige over the Centuries has been for many different reasons, the idea of marraige for Love is fairly recent in the scheme of things.
I think these days more and more people are of the oppinion that Love doesn't necessarily last forever and that a person can love many people in their lifetime.
However, I don't think that marraige will become redundant, it means too many different things to different people.
To some it is security, to some it is sacrament, to some it is a symbol and to some it's a chance to throw a big fuckin' party
Also, I think degrees of decadence and wotnot seems to come in cycles. I can't help but wonder if some HUGE event happened in the world if it wouldn't shift oppinions on something like marraige and perceptions of family values.
I dunno, things come 'n go don't they? That is what I was wondering... people do no longer work in the same job a whole life time... and they do not seem to stay with the same partner forever. (Generalisation, I know.. not meant to be)
So our perception of values has changed as you said."
Also, don't forget there have always been miserable marraiges but it's only in the last 30 years or so that divorce has been made relatively easy - I expect if anything that might make getting hitched even more popular cos they know if it goes tits up, they can walk away and have another go
perhaps marraige will always be popular...just not taken as seriously by some |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Got married in 1980, had our first child in 1983, second in 1985.
Still married and only the other day looked through the wedding album.
The only down side was our kids were the only ones that had mum & dad still living together by the time they left school.
similar to us, married in 84 first one in 87 and then 90..
we also noticed the decline in our kids friends parents mariages as they grew up..
i think on the general question that if something, be that 'traditional' marriage or partnership or whatever works for cpl's and the kids are well loved etc then its a bit like horses for courses.."
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"
perhaps marraige will always be popular...just not taken as seriously by some "
You could be right... it would be difficult to imagine it not existing. Wonder what it would do to the economy if.... |
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well the traditional marriage concept appears to be falling as social convention says you are no longer ostracized for living together any longer.
I mean with religions on the wane slowly too,i think it will become something quaint people used to do,i believe eventually people will do it to be different. |
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"I would like to think I might get married again, some time in the future. I loved being married the first time. We only had a small wedding but it is etched into my mind. Mine was "comparatively" small, too and I remember it fondly (but then I get on well with my ex). "
My first marriage was great, I still have that feeling of great happiness when memories come to the surface. At the time I got married I could never of thought of a day without her |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"I would like to think I might get married again, some time in the future. I loved being married the first time. We only had a small wedding but it is etched into my mind. Mine was "comparatively" small, too and I remember it fondly (but then I get on well with my ex).
My first marriage was great, I still have that feeling of great happiness when memories come to the surface. At the time I got married I could never of thought of a day without her"
And it is great to have memories of that intense feeling - even if you are in a different place now, dont you think? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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More men will be marrying men, and women marrying women.
Growing up, I thought marriage was on the decline, but my personal experience so far is the opposite. Most of our friends are married and have been together for years. Only a couple have divorced.
Likely that will change as time goes on, but I think people will still get married, and people will still value some form of public commitment to raising a family together. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"More men will be marrying men, and women marrying women.
Growing up, I thought marriage was on the decline, but my personal experience so far is the opposite. Most of our friends are married and have been together for years. Only a couple have divorced.
Likely that will change as time goes on, but I think people will still get married, and people will still value some form of public commitment to raising a family together."
Do you think people will still spend a fortune on that one big day or will it be a different format? |
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"I would like to think I might get married again, some time in the future. I loved being married the first time. We only had a small wedding but it is etched into my mind. Mine was "comparatively" small, too and I remember it fondly (but then I get on well with my ex).
My first marriage was great, I still have that feeling of great happiness when memories come to the surface. At the time I got married I could never of thought of a day without her
And it is great to have memories of that intense feeling - even if you are in a different place now, dont you think?"
I would have still been married, could never have thought of a day without her. Be twenty years this year that she died. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"I would like to think I might get married again, some time in the future. I loved being married the first time. We only had a small wedding but it is etched into my mind. Mine was "comparatively" small, too and I remember it fondly (but then I get on well with my ex).
My first marriage was great, I still have that feeling of great happiness when memories come to the surface. At the time I got married I could never of thought of a day without her
And it is great to have memories of that intense feeling - even if you are in a different place now, dont you think?
I would have still been married, could never have thought of a day without her. Be twenty years this year that she died. "
I am so so sorry to read that - must have been so tough for you xx |
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"More men will be marrying men, and women marrying women.
Growing up, I thought marriage was on the decline, but my personal experience so far is the opposite. Most of our friends are married and have been together for years. Only a couple have divorced.
Likely that will change as time goes on, but I think people will still get married, and people will still value some form of public commitment to raising a family together.
Do you think people will still spend a fortune on that one big day or will it be a different format? "
probably online like some divorces are now ,lol can you imagine a fabs ceremony lol |
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"I would like to think I might get married again, some time in the future. I loved being married the first time. We only had a small wedding but it is etched into my mind. Mine was "comparatively" small, too and I remember it fondly (but then I get on well with my ex).
My first marriage was great, I still have that feeling of great happiness when memories come to the surface. At the time I got married I could never of thought of a day without her
And it is great to have memories of that intense feeling - even if you are in a different place now, dont you think?
I would have still been married, could never have thought of a day without her. Be twenty years this year that she died.
I am so so sorry to read that - must have been so tough for you xx"
After a while the sadness turns you numb, the hurt turns to memories of only good times. I can honestly say I can not remember the content of a argument we shared. But I can still remember the scent of her the morning I went out to work, strange really |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"More men will be marrying men, and women marrying women.
Growing up, I thought marriage was on the decline, but my personal experience so far is the opposite. Most of our friends are married and have been together for years. Only a couple have divorced.
Likely that will change as time goes on, but I think people will still get married, and people will still value some form of public commitment to raising a family together.
Do you think people will still spend a fortune on that one big day or will it be a different format? "
It here will always be some who feel they splash the cash, others that have different priorities and others that have little choice - so much the same I guess.
What I do wonder is that we may see this period as having been a golden time for travel and in the future it won't be the norm to hop on a plane etc. which may limit the exotic weddings and stag/hen nights abroad etc.
Then again 50 years is a long time, people may be hopping through worm holes, marrying underground or in underwater cathedrals and honeymooning in space
Online weddings?.. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"I would like to think I might get married again, some time in the future. I loved being married the first time. We only had a small wedding but it is etched into my mind. Mine was "comparatively" small, too and I remember it fondly (but then I get on well with my ex).
My first marriage was great, I still have that feeling of great happiness when memories come to the surface. At the time I got married I could never of thought of a day without her
And it is great to have memories of that intense feeling - even if you are in a different place now, dont you think?
I would have still been married, could never have thought of a day without her. Be twenty years this year that she died.
I am so so sorry to read that - must have been so tough for you xx
After a while the sadness turns you numb, the hurt turns to memories of only good times. I can honestly say I can not remember the content of a argument we shared. But I can still remember the scent of her the morning I went out to work, strange really"
Our sense of smell is the most primal and intense sense - I am glad you have only happy memories. |
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"I would like to think I might get married again, some time in the future. I loved being married the first time. We only had a small wedding but it is etched into my mind. Mine was "comparatively" small, too and I remember it fondly (but then I get on well with my ex).
My first marriage was great, I still have that feeling of great happiness when memories come to the surface. At the time I got married I could never of thought of a day without her
And it is great to have memories of that intense feeling - even if you are in a different place now, dont you think?
I would have still been married, could never have thought of a day without her. Be twenty years this year that she died.
I am so so sorry to read that - must have been so tough for you xx
After a while the sadness turns you numb, the hurt turns to memories of only good times. I can honestly say I can not remember the content of a argument we shared. But I can still remember the scent of her the morning I went out to work, strange reallyOur sense of smell is the most primal and intense sense - I am glad you have only happy memories."
Only memories worth keeping. |
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probably online like some divorces are now ,lol can you imagine a fabs ceremony lol You should creatae a new thread on fabs weddings"
Do you goofy_twat_teeth take auntymeredith,shag_ina_handbag,and gobble_geek to be your unlawfully wedded fuckbuddies.  |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"
probably online like some divorces are now ,lol can you imagine a fabs ceremony lol You should creatae a new thread on fabs weddings
Do you goofy_twat_teeth take auntymeredith,shag_ina_handbag,and gobble_geek to be your unlawfully wedded fuckbuddies. "
I need help |
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