FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > I’ve just seen something on Twitter and thought that’s DEFINITELY a question for the women of Fab …
I’ve just seen something on Twitter and thought that’s DEFINITELY a question for the women of Fab …
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Here’s the quote from the Fesshole confessions account:
“My wife likes when I wear my wedding ring because she thinks it minimises attention from other women. The truth is it significantly increases the attention. Don't know if they take it as a signal that I'm less threatening, or just want what they can't have, but I love it”
Interesting response in the replies:
“According to a YouTube expert it means other women subconsciously see you as already successfully vetted by another woman therefore worth checking out”
Whatdya think, Fabsters? 
An internet fuck site forum is always a great place to hear the views on marital fidelity isn’t it?
Anyway, don’t shoot the messenger .. but as Mrs Merton might say (gawd bless her soul) “let’s have a heated debate!”
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I’m a girls girl who’s against cheating…. I just see it as a man who happens to be married… not something to accomplish haha.
A hot guy is a hot guy and some are available and some aren’t lol
Those fesses always make me think I’m the strange one  ha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This is already pretty well known, it’s called preselection and it happens everywhere
If you can show other woman that a woman has already met you, vetted you and deemed you desirable they are going to be more attractive
“What Is Preselection? Preselection is a principle which dictates that women are more attracted to men that seem attractive to other women” |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think sometimes in public a woman flirts with a married man (or vice versa) exactly because he is married and it won’t go further. A nice ego boost, a bit of a cheeky laugh but no aim or desire for more.
I would definitely avoid a married guy because it’s bound to lead to tears and drama at some point! Plus swinging for me is all about consent - and his wife is NOT consenting so no.
But yes pre-selection is probably also a thing biologically I guess |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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BTW I’ve been thinking about something similar that happened to me on here recently
I had a meet recently after months without - and the moment I had a new veri posted so many people reached out hoping to meet. Is that preselection too? |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
I'm possibly more likely to chat with them in a relaxed manner which had often been deemed as flirting. Really it's just me not feeling like I have to make an effort to seem 'worthy of attention' if that makes sense. I'll just chat as I do anyone else |
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As a married cheating man, i dont wear a wedding ring and havent for years. Not to dupe anyone but because i almost lost my finger in a work related accident, so i dont wear any jewellery.
The Preselection concept is interesting though. Is that why so many men on fab show pics and videos of them having sex with other women ?.
The " she found me hot, and she is hot, so maybe you will" idea. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"BTW I’ve been thinking about something similar that happened to me on here recently
I had a meet recently after months without - and the moment I had a new veri posted so many people reached out hoping to meet. Is that preselection too? "
No that’s your verification showing up in the local updates
Generally it’s the opposite for guys. They tend to find women less desirable if they’re taken |
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By *ie n MashCouple
over a year ago
Back in Malice |
Very interesting subject, which we have just discussed between us.
The female perspective is that women see it as a challenge and a way of proving themselves more attractive than the incumbent woman.
The male perspective, having (unbelievably) been chased by women at work in the past, thinks that there is a competitive streak in some women (normally those that have not had particularly fulfilling emotional relationships) that drives them to have what someone else has to prove a point to themselves.
In our personal experience, women are more likely to go after an attached male than the other way round. Not to say that Pie hasn't been hit on by married men or that all men are angels. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Would this work the other way round. Id buy my own cheap fake wedding ring if that works.
I currently wear a snake ring on my wedding finger to symbolise how cursed I've been in never making it to the alter, I think a serpent is quite fitting and also a sign not to go there. True story! Welcome to my dark side   |
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"Would this work the other way round. Id buy my own cheap fake wedding ring if that works.
I currently wear a snake ring on my wedding finger to symbolise how cursed I've been in never making it to the alter, I think a serpent is quite fitting and also a sign not to go there. True story! Welcome to my dark side "
I'm sure you get hit on by both married and single males and plenty of females too |
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Men & women are now like products on Amazon, you look at the reviews and how many... if you get one random 5 star review it's probably fake, but 50 reviews at an average 4.5 stars it's worth a try.
The ring isn't a factor for us, if they are cheating the person they have been "vetted" by hasn't vetted them for this. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've never had a wedding ring but I do find Women seem to approach more when I'm taken. I would say in a friendly manner, my ex would say drooling and trying to steal me.
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My first question would be, why is he taking his wedding ring off?
I think a gold ring looks very attractive on a man's hand but it doesn't make *him* more attractive to me. I don't mind borrowing a man with his wife's permission though  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The forbidden fruit. Some people want what they shouldn't have.
Also a lot of married men appear less desperate, which is appealing to women "
I've never found married men are less desperate. Not in the least. |
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"Isn’t it funny how men are saying ‘women do blah blah’ and the women are actually like ‘no way’ "
I would hazard a guess that *some* if the men who notice this phenomenon are open to being approached and dare I say it might even encourage it... |
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By *EAT..85Woman
over a year ago
Nottingham |
Many years ago I always went for married men and saw them either as a challenge or as suitably unemotionally available and a safe encounter. I'm not that person any more and I believe in karma and have reaped my reward, worry not.
There was a particularly gorgeous guy on the tram this morning, who when I checked had a wedding band on. My thoughts were 'of course someone put a ring on that! with an accompanying huff and eyeroll  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Isn’t it funny how men are saying ‘women do blah blah’ and the women are actually like ‘no way’ "
It’s kind of like those people that say on Fab they’ll never meet cheaters in a public forum .. but then do
#LoadsDoIt |
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