FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Does fab make you feel ugly
Does fab make you feel ugly
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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If so why? Is it The beautiful others you see?
What it is it? I see some self deprecation sometimes and I’m guilty of it at times too. Do you genuinely not like the way you look? |
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No, you'll always look better than some, worse than others. |
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Not ugly, no. But I do feel more self conscious about pubic hair after seeing so many pictures of other women who get rid of theirs. |
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No.
When I feel ugly, that's my perception, and owning what's brought me to that point is important  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It made me feel more attractive body-wise as I always thought women went for more "manly" physiques as opposed to slimmer ones but it's been a nice surprise and that's made me feel more attractive.
Facially, I definitely feel ugly. When someone starts a conversation and I share a face pic and the replies then stop and it happens more times then I can count, you do start to get a complex. Oh, and I get that I can't be everyone's type and that's fine, but it does give me a hit to the confidence when it does happen. |
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Fab actually makes us feel quite attractive. |
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No it doesn't. I've never compared myself negatively to other people as far as looks go.
I'm happy with how I look with the exception of my right foot which is not nice to look at. |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look."
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here? |
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No. I think some people may think I look a lot better than I actually do though. If you’re happy in yourself I don’t think other people’s opinions really affect you anymore. It’s how you feel that matters. Not everyone is going to like you/fancy you/think you’re gorgeous etc. X |
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"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?"
Because it's bad form to say how amazing and beautiful you are and so people don't but I am truly amazing and truly beautiful  |
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"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?"
Because people love to build up those with low self esteem and knock down the ones with high self esteem |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It made me feel more attractive body-wise as I always thought women went for more "manly" physiques as opposed to slimmer ones but it's been a nice surprise and that's made me feel more attractive.
Facially, I definitely feel ugly. When someone starts a conversation and I share a face pic and the replies then stop and it happens more times then I can count, you do start to get a complex. Oh, and I get that I can't be everyone's type and that's fine, but it does give me a hit to the confidence when it does happen."
I relate to this. There’s lots of ways that fab has made me feel more attractive. I enjoy it in that sense. But there are times when I’m like, damn, am I ugly? I tend to not internalise it and like you say acknowledge that you can’t be everyone’s type but like when you send out face pictures and are told no thanks or you’re ignored then you do kinda start to think about it. Fab is a weird space for me. Makes me feel sexy but also ugly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No. Fab doesn't make me feel ugly. Rejection makes me feel a bit ugly... perhaps that word is too harsh. I often feel unattractive especially when things aren't going my way on fab. I don't think it's a fab thing though. I think that's a me thing and the people I'm interacting with making me feel that way. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?
Because it's bad form to say how amazing and beautiful you are and so people don't but I am truly amazing and truly beautiful "
You don’t have to say you’re amazing or beautiful lol. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No. Fab doesn't make me feel ugly. Rejection makes me feel a bit ugly... perhaps that word is too harsh. I often feel unattractive especially when things aren't going my way on fab. I don't think it's a fab thing though. I think that's a me thing and the people I'm interacting with making me feel that way. "
I find it more a thing on fab for me in terms of rejection. On dating apps for example, I don’t ever think about that swipe left on me because I don’t know. I know on fab who sees my face and doesn’t like it. If that makes sense  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No. Fab doesn't make me feel ugly. Rejection makes me feel a bit ugly... perhaps that word is too harsh. I often feel unattractive especially when things aren't going my way on fab. I don't think it's a fab thing though. I think that's a me thing and the people I'm interacting with making me feel that way. "
you’re gorgeous btw.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?
Because people love to build up those with low self esteem and knock down the ones with high self esteem"
What does this mean? Sorry brain really not working and also I’m just a tad slow. |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?"
I think it’s a usually reflection of how you are feeling not your physical attractiveness. I think a mentally healthy person should feel alright, ok, not too bad; and occasionally sexy as fuck or urgh when looking in the mirror |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No. I’ve never felt that way on here. It’s given me a confidence boost if anything.
That doesn’t mean I don’t feel that way about myself but it’s never been because of fab. |
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By *heelerMan
over a year ago
Northants |
Were all ugly to some its easy way to say "no thanks" |
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The occasional rejection after chatting. Pick myself up and carry on |
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No rather the opposite if anything. Though it rather bemuses me. |
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By *oss25Man
over a year ago
Flitwick and Fakenham |
Not really, it’s more a confidence boost from the messages and meets that on balance are pretty amazing.
There are some on here that would do you down if allowed but hey who cares what they think anyway |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?
I think it’s a usually reflection of how you are feeling not your physical attractiveness. I think a mentally healthy person should feel alright, ok, not too bad; and occasionally sexy as fuck or urgh when looking in the mirror "
That’s fair. I think mental well-being is a massive factor. I agree on that |
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"Because people love to build up those with low self esteem and knock down the ones with high self esteem
What does this mean? Sorry brain really not working and also I’m just a tad slow. "
Probably to do with the way if I say something negative about myself, there are a thousand people there telling me nice things and trying to bring me up. Whereas if I say I consider myself even slightly attractive, it's 95% messages telling me I'm a stuck up narcissistic cunt |
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Ugly is subjective, but my tiny ego shrinks more and feel ignored often.
Anyway, here is a famous positive quote from a famous band.
'' Life is life''
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"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?
Because people love to build up those with low self esteem and knock down the ones with high self esteem
What does this mean? Sorry brain really not working and also I’m just a tad slow. "
Well, I have noticed that anyone who claims they feel unattractive will get far more attention, compliments and offers to meet than someone who openly says they are happy with how they look or, may the words wither on my lips, has the temerity to openly acknowledge that they're attractive *in their opinion*. Hence self deprecation wins.
I'm already thinking I should compliment your intelligence and say you're not slow. I probably wouldn't do that if you'd replied by telling me that despite your high intelligence you still didn't understand my point |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Because people love to build up those with low self esteem and knock down the ones with high self esteem
What does this mean? Sorry brain really not working and also I’m just a tad slow.
Probably to do with the way if I say something negative about myself, there are a thousand people there telling me nice things and trying to bring me up. Whereas if I say I consider myself even slightly attractive, it's 95% messages telling me I'm a stuck up narcissistic cunt "
Ah. Yeah I totally get that.
Being confident in my life has very often been met with negative comments about me. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?
Because people love to build up those with low self esteem and knock down the ones with high self esteem
What does this mean? Sorry brain really not working and also I’m just a tad slow.
Well, I have noticed that anyone who claims they feel unattractive will get far more attention, compliments and offers to meet than someone who openly says they are happy with how they look or, may the words wither on my lips, has the temerity to openly acknowledge that they're attractive *in their opinion*. Hence self deprecation wins.
I'm already thinking I should compliment your intelligence and say you're not slow. I probably wouldn't do that if you'd replied by telling me that despite your high intelligence you still didn't understand my point "
Totally with you. Although I should add, the slow thing was more a comment on how I’m feeling right now rather than how I generally see myself. I’m not a silly boy, I know that. |
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[Removed by poster at 19/10/23 14:04:41] |
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"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?
Because people love to build up those with low self esteem and knock down the ones with high self esteem
What does this mean? Sorry brain really not working and also I’m just a tad slow.
Well, I have noticed that anyone who claims they feel unattractive will get far more attention, compliments and offers to meet than someone who openly says they are happy with how they look or, may the words wither on my lips, has the temerity to openly acknowledge that they're attractive *in their opinion*. Hence self deprecation wins.
I'm already thinking I should compliment your intelligence and say you're not slow. I probably wouldn't do that if you'd replied by telling me that despite your high intelligence you still didn't understand my point
Totally with you. Although I should add, the slow thing was more a comment on how I’m feeling right now rather than how I generally see myself. I’m not a silly boy, I know that. "
Good. You know a lot of stuff and talk intelligently about it. |
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"If so why? Is it The beautiful others you see?
What it is it? I see some self deprecation sometimes and I’m guilty of it at times too. Do you genuinely not like the way you look? "
There are times it has made me feel insecure or down about myself but I am aware enough to know that it is my problem not the site or anyone elses. How I react to stuff is up to me.
In general, no it doesn't affect me much anymore. So long as I like me, thats all that matters. And I do.
MrsAbz |
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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago
Redhill |
Never. Quite the opposite really! |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?
Because people love to build up those with low self esteem and knock down the ones with high self esteem
What does this mean? Sorry brain really not working and also I’m just a tad slow.
Well, I have noticed that anyone who claims they feel unattractive will get far more attention, compliments and offers to meet than someone who openly says they are happy with how they look or, may the words wither on my lips, has the temerity to openly acknowledge that they're attractive *in their opinion*. Hence self deprecation wins.
I'm already thinking I should compliment your intelligence and say you're not slow. I probably wouldn't do that if you'd replied by telling me that despite your high intelligence you still didn't understand my point "
I don’t think telling people here they are beautiful or you fancy them helps with self low self esteem.
It just reinforces that their value is based on how much you want to fuck them or not , over time this makes them worse.
If you want to build someone up try to give genuine comments about their character, actions , decisions - things they can control and be proud of.
If you want spoilt, entitled, insecure children. tell them how beautiful smart and clever they are - all the things they have zero control over |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Never. Quite the opposite really! "
yeah I get that for you though  |
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And then Donald was formed........ |
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"And then Donald was formed........"
Damn ....that was supposed to go under HottNotts..... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"And then Donald was formed........"
Donald Glover. Handsome man. Question marks over him though.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?
Because people love to build up those with low self esteem and knock down the ones with high self esteem
What does this mean? Sorry brain really not working and also I’m just a tad slow.
Well, I have noticed that anyone who claims they feel unattractive will get far more attention, compliments and offers to meet than someone who openly says they are happy with how they look or, may the words wither on my lips, has the temerity to openly acknowledge that they're attractive *in their opinion*. Hence self deprecation wins.
I'm already thinking I should compliment your intelligence and say you're not slow. I probably wouldn't do that if you'd replied by telling me that despite your high intelligence you still didn't understand my point "
I think self deprecation wins out to a point. It can get to a place where people are attracted to confidence and if you are constantly self deprecating about yourself and can't see the attractiveness in you, then others are going to feel the same |
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"If so why? Is it The beautiful others you see?
What it is it? I see some self deprecation sometimes and I’m guilty of it at times too. Do you genuinely not like the way you look? "
Nope! If my self esteem was dependent on other people, I wouldn't be anywhere near FAB!
It's always baffled me how the thoughts or words of someone you don't know, and will never meet would be important, or hurtful.
If I thought people I loved or cared for thought I was an uggo, I'd agree because I have impeccable taste in friends! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If so why? Is it The beautiful others you see?
What it is it? I see some self deprecation sometimes and I’m guilty of it at times too. Do you genuinely not like the way you look? "
Nope, quite the opposite. I know that I'm by no means chiseled from marble, but I've come to appreciate the way that I look which in turn has made me considerably more confident.
Don't get me wrong, I do have days where Im hard on myself and wish something was different, but those are always going to happen and it's a case of managing it and moving on. Everyone is hot in their own way  |
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Not Ugley, sometimes it makes me feel that I'm invisible the every now and then a gem comes alone. |
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"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?
Because people love to build up those with low self esteem and knock down the ones with high self esteem
What does this mean? Sorry brain really not working and also I’m just a tad slow.
Well, I have noticed that anyone who claims they feel unattractive will get far more attention, compliments and offers to meet than someone who openly says they are happy with how they look or, may the words wither on my lips, has the temerity to openly acknowledge that they're attractive *in their opinion*. Hence self deprecation wins.
I'm already thinking I should compliment your intelligence and say you're not slow. I probably wouldn't do that if you'd replied by telling me that despite your high intelligence you still didn't understand my point
I don’t think telling people here they are beautiful or you fancy them helps with self low self esteem.
It just reinforces that their value is based on how much you want to fuck them or not , over time this makes them worse.
If you want to build someone up try to give genuine comments about their character, actions , decisions - things they can control and be proud of.
If you want spoilt, entitled, insecure children. tell them how beautiful smart and clever they are - all the things they have zero control over"
I agree but it continues because the rewards are high for those who aren't genuinely burdened with low self esteem. For those people no amount of compliments will help. |
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"If so why? Is it The beautiful others you see?
What it is it? I see some self deprecation sometimes and I’m guilty of it at times too. Do you genuinely not like the way you look? "
I don't think I see what (some) others see. I was considering too fat/ugly to fancy at school, I know boys who fancied me got teased to the point where one was evil to me for a whole year, to prove to his mates that there was no attraction. Some other horrible things happened at school too. I think that's stuck with me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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[Removed by poster at 19/10/23 14:18:10] |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
Only when the  emojis make an appearance on body hair threads. Or when men say fat women only get laid because men are desperate. Or when folk say petite women are more feminine.
Other than that, not really  |
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"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?
Because people love to build up those with low self esteem and knock down the ones with high self esteem
What does this mean? Sorry brain really not working and also I’m just a tad slow.
Well, I have noticed that anyone who claims they feel unattractive will get far more attention, compliments and offers to meet than someone who openly says they are happy with how they look or, may the words wither on my lips, has the temerity to openly acknowledge that they're attractive *in their opinion*. Hence self deprecation wins.
I'm already thinking I should compliment your intelligence and say you're not slow. I probably wouldn't do that if you'd replied by telling me that despite your high intelligence you still didn't understand my point
I think self deprecation wins out to a point. It can get to a place where people are attracted to confidence and if you are constantly self deprecating about yourself and can't see the attractiveness in you, then others are going to feel the same"
Yep but specifically on fab *some* men will cluster around a woman who says she feels ugly (it doesn't seem to work in reverse) with compliments and offers to meet. I'll leave you to decide on the reasons... |
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No I don't think it makes me feel ugly, doesn't make me feel better about myself either, I'm just here & don't really think about it.
The photos we take for fab though do make me feel a little more confident if anything.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So from my perspective being a bigger guy i go through highs and lows on here, its not so much feeling im ugly but more frustrated at times mainly when u get someone that describes the person they want and it decribes u perfectly so u message and they say sorry not my type or not for me lol and i also find dating sites are way worse for peoples mental health than fab will ever be |
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"Only when the emojis make an appearance on body hair threads. Or when men say fat women only get laid because men are desperate. Or when folk say petite women are more feminine.
Other than that, not really "
I was once compared to a gorilla or monkey on here . I was flattered, gorillas are lovely |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No my mirror does. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nah, I simply acknowledge that, to the majority of women on here, I’ll be unattractive.
That’s not me thinking I’m ugly, because I KNOW I’m a handsome fucker. |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
No I felt this way long before fab. I would say it doesn't help if you get stuck in the comparison cycle though |
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I wouldn't say it's made me feel ugly but in general I have thought it would be nice to see what others see when I'm told I'm stunning sexy xyz
In my eyes I'm just ok
Things I have been through in life with men has made me feel that being seen as beautiful was more of a curse than a blessing.
The only thing that's kept it a blessing was that I have had decent relationships in life so far and the ugly situations I had been through with men was never from a guy that was a partner of mine at the time
I will always be grateful for that  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No, I stopped comparing myself to others along time ago and I’ll never spiral through self depreciation again. Why waste time with negative self talk when you could use that energy for a positive purpose like becoming healthier or self care.. whatever it is that makes you happy. You look good you feel good and that energy is contagious.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yep but specifically on fab *some* men will cluster around a woman who says she feels ugly (it doesn't seem to work in reverse) with compliments and offers to meet. I'll leave you to decide on the reasons..."
Ahhh that makes sense actually, I think was going from a man's perspective but can definitely see that happening with women |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No. Not since I stopped looking for validation here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not ugly, no. But I do feel more self conscious about pubic hair after seeing so many pictures of other women who get rid of theirs. "
Bring back bush |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nope I always have known i am as ugly as sin don’t need Fab to do anything |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes! It does suck not getting attention which kinda makes me feel bad. |
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Fab has never made me feel anything one way or the other.
It's a website full of anonymous people, some of whom are better than others with angles when taking pics.
It doesn't make them any better or worse than me or any more attractive.
I've never once seen this as a competition because even if I did who would I be competing against?
All men?
All 58 year old men?
All 58 year old men in my area?
I'm happy with how I look for my age but I don't post pics for validation or fabs which is lucky as I don't get much of either but that's irrelevant.
I post pics because I'm feeling in an artistic mood and might share some of them.
If others appreciate them that's just a bonus but if they don't it doesn't make me feel unwanted or ugly. |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
If anything it's made me feel more attractive in the eyes of women than I imagined. Definite net positive here |
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No. I don’t seek validation from anywhere. |
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"Not ugly, no. But I do feel more self conscious about pubic hair after seeing so many pictures of other women who get rid of theirs.
Bring back bush"
Big fan of bush here too! |
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Yes in a way, as I message people and either get ignored, message deleted or a not for me/us sorry. I'm polite and do as they ask in their profiles. I know I won't be everyone's cup of tea I get that, but it makes me feel ugly and knocks my confidence and mental health. |
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"Not ugly, no. But I do feel more self conscious about pubic hair after seeing so many pictures of other women who get rid of theirs.
Bring back bush
Big fan of bush here too!"
I prefered Clinton personally. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes |
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For my age as cocks average size has increased and I read that people from mybackground had smaller cocks than the indegineous people of the uk, I was blessed with a varying of at least 6 inches up to almost 6.6 inches.
Looking at some of those that contact us about 30% I guess are VWE - though not sure if it their real pics.
So I do feel a little inadequate but as older and cock not as erecte as b4, bothered but not that much |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No. That doesn't even compute with me.
I get my cues from people who meet me in person, not faceless strangers on the internet, and I've never been one to follow trends... |
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"Not ugly, no. But I do feel more self conscious about pubic hair after seeing so many pictures of other women who get rid of theirs. "
Don't... I still have mine! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not ugly, no. But I do feel more self conscious about pubic hair after seeing so many pictures of other women who get rid of theirs.
Don't... I still have mine! "
For those questioning their pubic topiary choices, there are those of us that still like a bit of fluff.... |
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"Not ugly, no. But I do feel more self conscious about pubic hair after seeing so many pictures of other women who get rid of theirs.
Don't... I still have mine! "
I used to have some left until a waxing accident... now its just habit to have it all off.
Nothing wrong with leaving it on though
MrsAbz |
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Sometimes I feel like I look rough and other times I think I look ok, it changes |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yeah defo so
E of the comments sometimes are garsh |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. Fab doesn't make me feel ugly. Rejection makes me feel a bit ugly... perhaps that word is too harsh. I often feel unattractive especially when things aren't going my way on fab. I don't think it's a fab thing though. I think that's a me thing and the people I'm interacting with making me feel that way. "
This in bucket loads! |
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Not really I'm open and honest with people but not rude
I know I'm not for everyone and don't think I am
Just a realist with a thick cock a decent sex drive and a good life |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m too pretty for this thread |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Liverpool |
"It made me feel more attractive body-wise as I always thought women went for more "manly" physiques as opposed to slimmer ones but it's been a nice surprise and that's made me feel more attractive.
Facially, I definitely feel ugly. When someone starts a conversation and I share a face pic and the replies then stop and it happens more times then I can count, you do start to get a complex. Oh, and I get that I can't be everyone's type and that's fine, but it does give me a hit to the confidence when it does happen."
All this!
The counter I've found is that some that I consider extremely attractive (I don't believe in the league system but think of that as context for an example) find my face just as attractive. I like it, and it makes me feel better about myself.
I've stopped worrying that the masses think I don't have an attractive face, and focus on those that for some bizzare reason do find my face attractive. (#youknowwhoyouare) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Generally no, on the outside anyway. And not in comparison to others (who said comparison was the thief of joy?). There are times when I read something in the forums, or an abusive message (fortunately I get few of those) who make me feel ugly on the inside. Maybe I’m too sensitive to sone things, but I refuse to harden my skin to accommodate the ugliness of some peoples souls. |
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"It made me feel more attractive body-wise as I always thought women went for more "manly" physiques as opposed to slimmer ones but it's been a nice surprise and that's made me feel more attractive.
Facially, I definitely feel ugly. When someone starts a conversation and I share a face pic and the replies then stop and it happens more times then I can count, you do start to get a complex. Oh, and I get that I can't be everyone's type and that's fine, but it does give me a hit to the confidence when it does happen.
All this!
The counter I've found is that some that I consider extremely attractive (I don't believe in the league system but think of that as context for an example) find my face just as attractive. I like it, and it makes me feel better about myself.
I've stopped worrying that the masses think I don't have an attractive face, and focus on those that for some bizzare reason do find my face attractive. (#youknowwhoyouare) "
Puts hand in the air |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I used to like the way I looked but now not so much, I am the first to admit I need to shift some weight!
Hopefully I will be back to appreciating myself asap!! Cos if I can't, how can others |
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I'm starting to love how I look and stating to love my body. And that comes from internal validation, being my own champion and checking in with myself. I know I look good when I feel good. And I don't need anyone to tell me that
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"Not ugly, no. But I do feel more self conscious about pubic hair after seeing so many pictures of other women who get rid of theirs. "
we still think you're sexy, even if you had hair poking out your nostrils and ears!! Haha
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The site also gives me a better of others bodies of all types which I think is good |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No.
There are parts of my body I may not love but I never feel ugly or not good looking. |
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Not ugly as such, but average. Problem is that photos don't get your character across - especially when you can't take a selfie to save your life |
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Not because of what others bring to the table, no. Not liking what I see in a mirror or photograph sometimes is my issue. I'm not going to think 'x has this, I had that' on pictures because they might be a total dick at the end of the day |
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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
Fab has helped my body confidence and self esteem. Being with people who appreciate you for who you are including imperfections certainly helps.
What I find is that the abusive messages are sent when you turn someone down or don’t respond to them. They used to bother me but as you get older you realise that you dodged a bullet.
If Fab makes you feel ugly then perhaps it’s not the right place for you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’d say yes fab has made me feel good about myself… |
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People just put themselves down in public to await the influx of posts saying "You are sexy babe" - "Are you OK hun?" - " Ignore everyone as you look beautiful " blah, blah, & blah....  |
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"Not ugly, no. But I do feel more self conscious about pubic hair after seeing so many pictures of other women who get rid of theirs. "
The more of this (full shave) I see on here (and in clubs too), the more set I am in keeping mine! Actually in the time since I joined fab I've embraced stopping shaving my armpits too. I don't post particularly explicit photos so people don't know by looking at my profile, but people do mention it to me in person at clubs - 99.9% of the time in a positive way. Please don't feel pressured in to getting rid of yours, you're not the only one! |
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By *acktopervMan
over a year ago
Stourport-On-Severn |
I can't say i ever have felt ugly, what i do feel is old lol |
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No not at all. I really don't see 'beautiful others'. Its just a sea of online people. I'm happy with the way i look although i know i could perhaps shift a little bit of weight, but thats just for me, not others. |
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"No. I’ve never felt that way on here. It’s given me a confidence boost if anything.
That doesn’t mean I don’t feel that way about myself but it’s never been because of fab. "
Same here, have had a massive confidence boost on here |
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Makes me feel old and vanilla !! |
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No not at all, as I don't compare to others their already taken, so why not be myself... |
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I consider myself quite fortunate in that regard, in the sense it doesn't affect me greatly. I am generally ok with how I look. I want people I am attracted to to be attracted to me because well duh. But it's rarely an issue as my attraction generally emerges after theirs. When it is the other way round - I go bashful as I don't know how to handle it lol. It's happened she was quite understanding thankfully.
I wouldn't say I am entirely happy with my body but that's health and energy levels rather than aesthetics.
I think there's a kind of self-deprecating culture, it's not specific to fab I think it's British maybe even moreso English culture where it's seen as conceited and attacked.
I have a reaction to it when I see it going on here and start singing I'm so pretty from West Side Story. Because frankly I believe it should be ok for someone to say I feel or am beautiful, if that's how they feel. |
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By *olarMan
over a year ago
woking |
Nope. It does make me question the accuracy of posted ages tho |
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The total opposite - if anything, being on fab has made me up my game in terms of making sure I feel better within myself |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People just put themselves down in public to await the influx of posts saying "You are sexy babe" - "Are you OK hun?" - " Ignore everyone as you look beautiful " blah, blah, & blah.... "
Or...they put themselves down because they feel like crap about themselves. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People just put themselves down in public to await the influx of posts saying "You are sexy babe" - "Are you OK hun?" - " Ignore everyone as you look beautiful " blah, blah, & blah.... "
That couldn't actually be further from the truth.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People just put themselves down in public to await the influx of posts saying "You are sexy babe" - "Are you OK hun?" - " Ignore everyone as you look beautiful " blah, blah, & blah....
That couldn't actually be further from the truth.
"
But it fits with a view of women as conceited, attention seeking people.  |
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"People just put themselves down in public to await the influx of posts saying "You are sexy babe" - "Are you OK hun?" - " Ignore everyone as you look beautiful " blah, blah, & blah....
That couldn't actually be further from the truth.
"
Really
Are you guilty of this? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If so why? Is it The beautiful others you see?
What it is it? I see some self deprecation sometimes and I’m guilty of it at times too. Do you genuinely not like the way you look? "
yeah I feel you on this as I sometimes feel that way, is it because its hard for genuine people to actually get talking on here ? Or is that me being silly, I don't know. |
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"People just put themselves down in public to await the influx of posts saying "You are sexy babe" - "Are you OK hun?" - " Ignore everyone as you look beautiful " blah, blah, & blah....
That couldn't actually be further from the truth.
A recent study reports that women who post tons of pics of themselves on social networking sites base their self-worth on appearance. Now fess up:
But it fits with a view of women as conceited, attention seeking people. "
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"People just put themselves down in public to await the influx of posts saying "You are sexy babe" - "Are you OK hun?" - " Ignore everyone as you look beautiful " blah, blah, & blah....
That couldn't actually be further from the truth.
But it fits with a view of women as conceited, attention seeking people. "
A recent study reports that women who post tons of pics of themselves on social networking sites base their self-worth on appearance. Now fess up:
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People just put themselves down in public to await the influx of posts saying "You are sexy babe" - "Are you OK hun?" - " Ignore everyone as you look beautiful " blah, blah, & blah....
That couldn't actually be further from the truth.
But it fits with a view of women as conceited, attention seeking people.
A recent study reports that women who post tons of pics of themselves on social networking sites base their self-worth on appearance. Now fess up:
"
You have an appropriate username. |
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"People just put themselves down in public to await the influx of posts saying "You are sexy babe" - "Are you OK hun?" - " Ignore everyone as you look beautiful " blah, blah, & blah....
That couldn't actually be further from the truth.
But it fits with a view of women as conceited, attention seeking people.
A recent study reports that women who post tons of pics of themselves on social networking sites base their self-worth on appearance. Now fess up:
You have an appropriate username."
Aww thank you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If so why? Is it The beautiful others you see?
What it is it? I see some self deprecation sometimes and I’m guilty of it at times too. Do you genuinely not like the way you look? "
Fab makes me feel a lot of things! Mostly anger, frustration, it’s a toxic playground. However having said that we do like to take pics and like that others appreciate them.
We are no means perfect or gym fit but it’s definitely a confidence boost when you get fabbed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It can do yes but I've never liked how I look so it just reinforces that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No
Being ugly makes me feel ugly! |
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"Not ugly, no. But I do feel more self conscious about pubic hair after seeing so many pictures of other women who get rid of theirs.
we still think you're sexy, even if you had hair poking out your nostrils and ears!! Haha"
Shh, you're not supposed to tell anyone about that  |
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"Not ugly, no. But I do feel more self conscious about pubic hair after seeing so many pictures of other women who get rid of theirs.
The more of this (full shave) I see on here (and in clubs too), the more set I am in keeping mine! Actually in the time since I joined fab I've embraced stopping shaving my armpits too. I don't post particularly explicit photos so people don't know by looking at my profile, but people do mention it to me in person at clubs - 99.9% of the time in a positive way. Please don't feel pressured in to getting rid of yours, you're not the only one! "
Oh don't worry, I feel no pressure to get rid of it. I tried that once as a teenager and will never repeat it
I think it's more that I hadn't slept with that many men before we started swinging and I'd never watched much porn, so it hadn't really occured to me that I might look different to other women. No man has ever objected, and they'd certainly be told where to go if they did  |
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I don't need Fab to make me feel ugly: I already know I'm ugly with an ugly personality |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No.
I knew I was before joining |
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Not really. I don’t approach women for anything so I’ve not had to fight the same fight other men on here do.
Fab has taught me a lot, particularly about perception |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s taught me that I’m attractive to those that fancy he and unattractive to those that don’t. Which is all that really matters |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
No, Fab doesn't make me feel ugly.
I don't compare myself to other women/people on Fab in terms of physically. I can admire their beauty/attractiveness and know that it doesn't affect my own. People can be attracted to a chubby frizzy haired woman like myself (that's not self deprecating, more realistic) and be attracted to someone slimmer and with sleeker hair.
I don't really get rejected on here. Would I if I was? Perhaps I might question it after awhile.
I do feel ugly sometimes. Hormonal changes can wreak havoc with my mental wellbeing. Or when I'm having a difficult time in relationships and start to think, fuck I must be really horrid inside and out. Careless comments from those dear to me in the past have hurt and then I would question if I was particularly attractive.
Most of the time I think I'm okay. I'm not sexy or hot but I'm pretty. Cute? I don't look bad.
I'm happier in myself these days and I'm finding I'm less worried, less oh no I'm ugly and more fuck it. I like my body. What it can do. The way my face lights up when I talk to people.
I like that for me. I like it a lot. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Good thread |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On certain days, as Usher says, 1 to 10 I'm a certified 20 in my head but that's if I've actually had sleep, been able to colour my hair and groom a bit, but outside my head I'm a 1, always been low numbers. But I don't care what others think now. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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[Removed by poster at 19/10/23 16:56:03] |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"On certain days, as Usher says, 1 to 10 I'm a certified 20 in my head but that's if I've actually had sleep, been able to colour my hair and groom a bit, but outside my head I'm a 1, always been low numbers. But I don't care what others think now.
Usher also says it’s seven o’clock I’m in my drop top cruising the streets. "
** |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We feel happy with our looks at our stage in life.
Maintaining the body gets harder but still gets done.
Just needs a little bit of dedication. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If so why? Is it The beautiful others you see?
What it is it? I see some self deprecation sometimes and I’m guilty of it at times too. Do you genuinely not like the way you look? "
I’m not happy with how I look, but Fab hasn’t driven that. I know how I want to look and I’ll pursue that goal whether it’s Fab-preferable or not.
I do feel ‘vanilla rejected’ fairly regularly, though. So many people looking for a kink element to their meets and I’m not interested in that at all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On certain days, as Usher says, 1 to 10 I'm a certified 20 in my head but that's if I've actually had sleep, been able to colour my hair and groom a bit, but outside my head I'm a 1, always been low numbers. But I don't care what others think now.
Usher also says it’s seven o’clock I’m in my drop top cruising the streets. **"
Does he? Do you? Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So far I've had nothing but lovely messages , when I see some banging babes on here though I can't help but feel I don't match up,but that's my own insecurities.
Everyone has something unique about them ,the way they smile ,their laugh or little quirks that don't come across in photo form. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No Sites like this are not good for the psyche because you're constantly judging yourself or people around you and when you try to approach somebody and they reject you it hurts you even more, A psychologist (I have three psychologists in my family were I got the information) said to me if something is hurting you take a break. If it's that important you will go back, if not you will find something better. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No Sites like this are not good for the psyche because you're constantly judging yourself or people around you and when you try to approach somebody and they reject you it hurts you even more, A psychologist (I have three psychologists in my family were I got the information) said to me if something is hurting you take a break. If it's that important you will go back, if not you will find something better. "
I’m not judging myself or anyone else  |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Liverpool |
"No Sites like this are not good for the psyche because you're constantly judging yourself or people around you and when you try to approach somebody and they reject you it hurts you even more, A psychologist (I have three psychologists in my family were I got the information) said to me if something is hurting you take a break. If it's that important you will go back, if not you will find something better. "
Ahhh now it makes sense. "I know a guy" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No. Although some people's ugly personalities definitely makes mine shine.
#takenoprisoners
F |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. Although some people's ugly personalities definitely makes mine shine.
#takenoprisoners
F"
You're welcome |
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Nah fine with me looks , not everyone’s cuppa T but sure someone out there likes me lol |
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I'm not sure I've seen anyone I'd call physically ugly on Fab tbh. I know some people here think they are a lot worse looking than I do. Some of them are genuinely good looking in my view. But we can be our own harshest critics sometimes, and maybe just not to our own tastes perhaps too  pt |
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Not ugly as such but a lot of th3 time I think "damn I'd have no chance with this person, especially not with other people like *that* person there as an option for them" |
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It actually has made me feel far more attractive and sexy than I did before I joined x |
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Nope, Fab makes me feel beautiful ... I get to be Wendy ?? |
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Ugly? No.
Inadequate and self-doubty? Occasionally, but I usually snap out of it quite quickly. |
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No more than I did before.
I've always hated myself and being on fabs hasn't changed this.
Mr |
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"It actually has made me feel far more attractive and sexy than I did before I joined x "
.
This has got to be the case for a lot of people surely?
Some sad people do create new accounts and just spam their hurtful abuse (I've experienced this myself), but for women especially it's hard to see how Fab itself could make them feel ugly. And people who look like models are everywhere in life, not just on Fab. Fab is a liberating place for many people surely.
Some single men might feel disgruntled by the lack of attention sometimes, but that's just a statistical thing. I've seen really fit men opine about their lack of messages on Fab, often purely philosophically. It doesn't make anyone physically ugly.
Being turned down a lot isn't fun I guess, but there are so many reasons that could happen that again it shouldn't change your opinion of yourself in my view, not in terms of considering yourself to be physically ugly anyway.
pt |
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No it doesn't make me feel ugly. Think the forum in general grounds you. Because yeah there are more attractive women on here than me, but the forum shows their personalities etc, and it's shows them as normal human beings not just pictures of attractive people. |
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You don't need Fab to confirm you are ugly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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[Removed by poster at 19/10/23 18:15:31] |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. Although some people's ugly personalities definitely makes mine shine.
#takenoprisoners
F"
Fuck me, I have one personality how many do you have |
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"It actually has made me feel far more attractive and sexy than I did before I joined x
.
This has got to be the case for a lot of people surely?
Some sad people do create new accounts and just spam their hurtful abuse (I've experienced this myself), but for women especially it's hard to see how Fab itself could make them feel ugly. And people who look like models are everywhere in life, not just on Fab. Fab is a liberating place for many people surely.
Some single men might feel disgruntled by the lack of attention sometimes, but that's just a statistical thing. I've seen really fit men opine about their lack of messages on Fab, often purely philosophically. It doesn't make anyone physically ugly.
Being turned down a lot isn't fun I guess, but there are so many reasons that could happen that again it shouldn't change your opinion of yourself in my view, not in terms of considering yourself to be physically ugly anyway.
pt"
But this doesn't answer the Op's question!....
Does it make you feel ugly? |
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"It actually has made me feel far more attractive and sexy than I did before I joined x
.
This has got to be the case for a lot of people surely?
Some sad people do create new accounts and just spam their hurtful abuse (I've experienced this myself), but for women especially it's hard to see how Fab itself could make them feel ugly. And people who look like models are everywhere in life, not just on Fab. Fab is a liberating place for many people surely.
Some single men might feel disgruntled by the lack of attention sometimes, but that's just a statistical thing. I've seen really fit men opine about their lack of messages on Fab, often purely philosophically. It doesn't make anyone physically ugly.
Being turned down a lot isn't fun I guess, but there are so many reasons that could happen that again it shouldn't change your opinion of yourself in my view, not in terms of considering yourself to be physically ugly anyway.
pt
But this doesn't answer the Op's question!....
Does it make you feel ugly? "
.
I was actually just thinking that funnily enough, but I'd responded to a responder anyway (the answer is no btw!) pt |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Pretty much. |
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"Pretty much. "
.
Why do you think? I mean obviously you are not. pt |
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Not just FAB, but all online dating does. Re enforces what I have always suspected....that I'm not an attractive person, but I'm good with that. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
No. Fab doesn't make me feel ugly. I make me feel unattractive and I allow others to make me feel unattractive sometimes. But fab, being on fab, nothing particularly about fab makes me feel ugly.
I feel others are more attractive than I am, but that doesn't make me feel less attractive. If that makes any sense? |
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"No. I think self depreciation here has nothing to do with how people look.
Interesting. Why do you think people are so self deprecating in here?"
I don't just do it in here. I do not hold myself in very high regard |
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"It actually has made me feel far more attractive and sexy than I did before I joined x
.
This has got to be the case for a lot of people surely?
Some sad people do create new accounts and just spam their hurtful abuse (I've experienced this myself), but for women especially it's hard to see how Fab itself could make them feel ugly. And people who look like models are everywhere in life, not just on Fab. Fab is a liberating place for many people surely.
Some single men might feel disgruntled by the lack of attention sometimes, but that's just a statistical thing. I've seen really fit men opine about their lack of messages on Fab, often purely philosophically. It doesn't make anyone physically ugly.
Being turned down a lot isn't fun I guess, but there are so many reasons that could happen that again it shouldn't change your opinion of yourself in my view, not in terms of considering yourself to be physically ugly anyway.
pt
But this doesn't answer the Op's question!....
Does it make you feel ugly?
.
I was actually just thinking that funnily enough, but I'd responded to a responder anyway (the answer is no btw!) pt"
Good stuff, we really shouldn't allow it to knock our self beliefs or confidence, in that way |
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By *mf123Man
over a year ago
with one foot out the door |
Nope the opposite it makes me see why its so easy to get laid |
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By *mber81Woman
over a year ago
Chorley, Eng |
I have little moments of not feeling attractive but I don't think that has anything to do with fab.
Swinging in general and club visits has done wonders for my body confidence. I think a lot of that is just seeing more naked bodies of real people and realising that some fat, or cellulite, or spots, etc doesn't stop me fancying people so it probably doesn't stop some other people fancying me.
Knights of the coffee table did a post a few weeks back that prompted me to take some straight on photos of my naked body showing the bits I liked the least. I absolutely don't feel sexy in those photos but it isn't unsexy either. It just is my body, it is me and sometimes I can make it look sexy. |
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"Pretty much. "
I thought you were lovely |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Pretty much.
.
Why do you think? I mean obviously you are not. pt"
Wow! That's quite a body you have there. Sorry for blurting that out but Holy moley! |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"Pretty much.
.
Why do you think? I mean obviously you are not. pt
Wow! That's quite a body you have there. Sorry for blurting that out but Holy moley!
"
.
What me? lol That's a first for fabswingers, or the forum anyway lol. Thank you, likewise. pt |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No, its my face that does that |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. Although some people's ugly personalities definitely makes mine shine.
#takenoprisoners
F
Fuck me, I have one personality how many do you have "
Do you not remember our vows when there was a clause that mentioned about my multiple personalities? Ohwell, too late now.
F |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"No, its my face that does that "
if your face is ugly your neck is lying lol |
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Nope it's been the opposite for me. Its given me so much more confidence in myself
M |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Going on some of messages I recieve at times the yeah |
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[Removed by poster at 19/10/23 20:37:16] |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No matter how ugly I am, there will always be men on Fab who want to fuck me. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No matter how ugly I am, there will always be men on Fab who want to fuck me. "
That’s because they haven’t seen you in real life |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"No. Although some people's ugly personalities definitely makes mine shine.
#takenoprisoners
F
Fuck me, I have one personality how many do you have
Do you not remember our vows when there was a clause that mentioned about my multiple personalities? Ohwell, too late now.
F"
I'm the only one who's stuck to our vows love |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Liverpool |
"No. Although some people's ugly personalities definitely makes mine shine.
#takenoprisoners
F
Fuck me, I have one personality how many do you have
Do you not remember our vows when there was a clause that mentioned about my multiple personalities? Ohwell, too late now.
F
I'm the only one who's stuck to our vows love "
Ummm if you two are going to have a domestic, can you please make a new thread of your own about it please! |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No matter how ugly I am, there will always be men on Fab who want to fuck me.
That’s because they haven’t seen you in real life "
Hang on... |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"No. Although some people's ugly personalities definitely makes mine shine.
#takenoprisoners
F
Fuck me, I have one personality how many do you have
Do you not remember our vows when there was a clause that mentioned about my multiple personalities? Ohwell, too late now.
F
I'm the only one who's stuck to our vows love
Ummm if you two are going to have a domestic, can you please make a new thread of your own about it please! "
Awks  |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
I wouldn't say ugly. It can sometimes not be good for the confidence but other times it is good. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"No. Although some people's ugly personalities definitely makes mine shine.
#takenoprisoners
F
Fuck me, I have one personality how many do you have
Do you not remember our vows when there was a clause that mentioned about my multiple personalities? Ohwell, too late now.
F
I'm the only one who's stuck to our vows love
Ummm if you two are going to have a domestic, can you please make a new thread of your own about it please! "
You're in our domestic now love, sit down, grab the pop corn and enjoy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It makes me more aware of it, I know what I am and generally am comfortable to accept it, but fab really makes me conscious of it, and is mainly why I’ll never venture to clubs again after trying them |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
