FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > What to do when you can't message anyone?
What to do when you can't message anyone?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'm rapidly getting to the point where iv messaged almost all the female profiles in my area and I haven't gotten any replies back!
And my area is London so that's saying something!
Almost every profile I click now say "I messaged them X month/days ago". I very rarely message twice if no reply so I guess I'd be done with this site pretty soon.! Hahah
What's my next option. Start looking in the next closest city. I think I'll cover the entire country by the end of the year! |
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Is a message a "hi howz u? , hot pics!" Or other short message? Or is it minimum a paragraph and referring to something specific in their profile, not just copy paste?
If it's the former, consider the latter. If its the latter, consider rewriting your profile and doing photos that might be conversation starters. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Messaged all the females in London?
Dude how much time do you have? "
Dude I'vebeen on his site for a few months, and ignoring the profiles where I'm clearly not what they are looking for,then yes. I find more profile where I've already messaged then where I haven't |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"And I thought I was shit at this!!! Keep going dude, you won’t win the lottery if you don’t buy a ticket…"
Lol true. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take....and sometimes you still miss 100%  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is a message a "hi howz u? , hot pics!" Or other short message? Or is it minimum a paragraph and referring to something specific in their profile, not just copy paste?
If it's the former, consider the latter. If its the latter, consider rewriting your profile and doing photos that might be conversation starters. "
It's normally a short para. Couple of lines about me, comments on their pics and what I'm looking for.
Your second suggestion is a good idea. Care to provide some pointers on my profile. |
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"Is a message a "hi howz u? , hot pics!" Or other short message? Or is it minimum a paragraph and referring to something specific in their profile, not just copy paste?
If it's the former, consider the latter. If its the latter, consider rewriting your profile and doing photos that might be conversation starters. "
This one  |
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"And I thought I was shit at this!!! Keep going dude, you won’t win the lottery if you don’t buy a ticket…
Lol true. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take....and sometimes you still miss 100% "
Bang on mate…keep on trucking |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So your preference is.....female?
Yes.
We all have our preferences"
Lol sorry I misunderstood. But yeah it's pretty generic. 25-45, slim to curvy, white or asain |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"3 months and you are complaining already?
It could be, I don't know, but you like groping?? That's maybe why your not having much luck?
"
Alright, point taken |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"3 months and you are complaining already?
It could be, I don't know, but you like groping?? That's maybe why your not having much luck?
Alright, point taken"
Thank you for removing. I wish you good luck x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm rapidly getting to the point where iv messaged almost all the female profiles in my area and I haven't gotten any replies back!
And my area is London so that's saying something!
Almost every profile I click now say "I messaged them X month/days ago". I very rarely message twice if no reply so I guess I'd be done with this site pretty soon.! Hahah
What's my next option. Start looking in the next closest city. I think I'll cover the entire country by the end of the year!"
All the women? Including the ones you don't find attractive? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I'm rapidly getting to the point where iv messaged almost all the female profiles in my area and I haven't gotten any replies back!
And my area is London so that's saying something!
Almost every profile I click now say "I messaged them X month/days ago". I very rarely message twice if no reply so I guess I'd be done with this site pretty soon.! Hahah
What's my next option. Start looking in the next closest city. I think I'll cover the entire country by the end of the year!
All the women? Including the ones you don't find attractive?"
Lol to clarify only the ones I find attractive and who have profiles and verified. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you’ve messaged every woman in London then I'm guessing you’ve done a copy and paste job and blasted out tons of generic messages.
That’ll never work with anyone. Just take your time, be authentic. Chill. Don’t rush things and don’t care too much.
My advice would be to take some time out and focus on other things. Fab isn’t that important. Then when you feel ready, come back. Message just a couple of people until you find what works, and take it from there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Give up and close your fab account."
I’m thinking of this  .
OP, I’m where you are. Chances of meeting anyone in your local area feel extremely slim on this site.
I’m just here for the forums. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you’ve messaged every woman in London then I'm guessing you’ve done a copy and paste job and blasted out tons of generic messages.
That’ll never work with anyone. Just take your time, be authentic. Chill. Don’t rush things and don’t care too much.
My advice would be to take some time out and focus on other things. Fab isn’t that important. Then when you feel ready, come back. Message just a couple of people until you find what works, and take it from there. "
Or that based on filters he can’t message everyone so he’s messaged everyone that he can that he’s interested in. Which isn’t that far fetched. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Give up and close your fab account. I’m thinking of this .
OP, I’m where you are. Chances of meeting anyone in your local area feel extremely slim on this site.
I’m just here for the forums. "
I'm just here for those socks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm rapidly getting to the point where iv messaged almost all the female profiles in my area and I haven't gotten any replies back!
And my area is London so that's saying something!
Almost every profile I click now say "I messaged them X month/days ago". I very rarely message twice if no reply so I guess I'd be done with this site pretty soon.! Hahah
What's my next option. Start looking in the next closest city. I think I'll cover the entire country by the end of the year!"
I find I get about 100x the success from the usual apps than on here. Took me like a year to get my first fab meet but I get 1-3 from apps every month.
Find what works. Ditch what doesn’t. Don’t keep trying on something that isn’t suited for you |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I’ve avoided receiving the same message every other woman in London has received from you.
Winning! "
"I’ve avoided receiving the same message every other woman in London has received from you.
Winning! "
Ooh let me copy and past you!...joking.
Ok, maybe I've slight exaggerated how many times I'm seeing the same profiles again. But it is a lot. However from messages here, clearly I need to be less specific. Although I'm not copy and pasting. I usually write a short para and mention a line or two specific to the profie.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm rapidly getting to the point where iv messaged almost all the female profiles in my area and I haven't gotten any replies back!
And my area is London so that's saying something!
Almost every profile I click now say "I messaged them X month/days ago". I very rarely message twice if no reply so I guess I'd be done with this site pretty soon.! Hahah
What's my next option. Start looking in the next closest city. I think I'll cover the entire country by the end of the year!
I find I get about 100x the success from the usual apps than on here. Took me like a year to get my first fab meet but I get 1-3 from apps every month.
Find what works. Ditch what doesn’t. Don’t keep trying on something that isn’t suited for you "
I also find other apps a bit better but only because men on those apps tend to be more respectful whereas most of the men (who message me)(and in my experience) -before anyone jumps on me, I find 99% of them on here so disrespectful and/or think that you're in the wrong place because you don't want to be spoken to like a hole that just happens to have a body attached |
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"I'm rapidly getting to the point where iv messaged almost all the female profiles in my area and I haven't gotten any replies back!
And my area is London so that's saying something!
Almost every profile I click now say "I messaged them X month/days ago". I very rarely message twice if no reply so I guess I'd be done with this site pretty soon.! Hahah
What's my next option. Start looking in the next closest city. I think I'll cover the entire country by the end of the year!"
You'll just have to relocate  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm rapidly getting to the point where iv messaged almost all the female profiles in my area and I haven't gotten any replies back!
And my area is London so that's saying something!
Almost every profile I click now say "I messaged them X month/days ago". I very rarely message twice if no reply so I guess I'd be done with this site pretty soon.! Hahah
What's my next option. Start looking in the next closest city. I think I'll cover the entire country by the end of the year!
I find I get about 100x the success from the usual apps than on here. Took me like a year to get my first fab meet but I get 1-3 from apps every month.
Find what works. Ditch what doesn’t. Don’t keep trying on something that isn’t suited for you
I also find other apps a bit better but only because men on those apps tend to be more respectful whereas most of the men (who message me)(and in my experience) -before anyone jumps on me, I find 99% of them on here so disrespectful and/or think that you're in the wrong place because you don't want to be spoken to like a hole that just happens to have a body attached "
That’s because the app’s ban by device now. Id your nasty and get banned your banned until you get a new phone
Tends to keep people in check |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If you’ve messaged every woman in London then I'm guessing you’ve done a copy and paste job and blasted out tons of generic messages.
That’ll never work with anyone. Just take your time, be authentic. Chill. Don’t rush things and don’t care too much.
My advice would be to take some time out and focus on other things. Fab isn’t that important. Then when you feel ready, come back. Message just a couple of people until you find what works, and take it from there.
Or that based on filters he can’t message everyone so he’s messaged everyone that he can that he’s interested in. Which isn’t that far fetched."
That would still be thousands of people, which is pretty ridiculous within 3 months (the age of his profile) |
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By *orny-DJMan
over a year ago
Leigh-on-Sea |
Ever think maybe some things you should keep to yourself?
Before committing your post to the forum, did you not read through it and think how it might come across to others?
Have you perhaps considered how your post might make you look to others?
Desperate?
Not fussy?
Will shag anything?
Probably found yourself added to a few block lists with that one |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Messaged all the females in London?
Dude how much time do you have?
Dude I'vebeen on his site for a few months, and ignoring the profiles where I'm clearly not what they are looking for,then yes. I find more profile where I've already messaged then where I haven't "
You're doing better than most men as you actually do read profiles.
If there's no-one else you fancy/ you're in their range then there's not much else to do.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Never mind op its how it is on here..
Are you saying those you do not message not attractive.. Looks are not everything.
Slim to curvy... Not me..
Am out |
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Quit moaning about getting replies get out there and mingle my friend go to clubs and the organised socials make those connections first then maybe you'll find what you seek it's ultimately upto you on how you proceed you can quit give up and leave or you can preserver and carry on trying knowing that those few times you do meet are worth it all |
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"Quit moaning about getting replies get out there and mingle my friend go to clubs and the organised socials make those connections first then maybe you'll find what you seek it's ultimately upto you on how you proceed you can quit give up and leave or you can preserver and carry on trying knowing that those few times you do meet are worth it all "
On second thought and after following the green arrow hmmm I retract my advice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is a message a "hi howz u? , hot pics!" Or other short message? Or is it minimum a paragraph and referring to something specific in their profile, not just copy paste?
If it's the former, consider the latter. If its the latter, consider rewriting your profile and doing photos that might be conversation starters.
It's normally a short para. Couple of lines about me, comments on their pics and what I'm looking for.
Your second suggestion is a good idea. Care to provide some pointers on my profile. "
Do you tell them that you're married? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Just attend a club or two and enjoy meeting people outside of the Fab online space (just a suggestion) "
Good idea. Iv never been to one, perhaps I'd look into it or find someone i can go with. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Perhaps change how you market yourself. New pics and profile text may elicit different results. If you're not blocked, then they've not closed the door at all. "
Thanks. I'll do that. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I'm rapidly getting to the point where iv messaged almost all the female profiles in my area and I haven't gotten any replies back!
And my area is London so that's saying something!
Almost every profile I click now say "I messaged them X month/days ago". I very rarely message twice if no reply so I guess I'd be done with this site pretty soon.! Hahah
What's my next option. Start looking in the next closest city. I think I'll cover the entire country by the end of the year!
I find I get about 100x the success from the usual apps than on here. Took me like a year to get my first fab meet but I get 1-3 from apps every month.
Find what works. Ditch what doesn’t. Don’t keep trying on something that isn’t suited for you
I also find other apps a bit better but only because men on those apps tend to be more respectful whereas most of the men (who message me)(and in my experience) -before anyone jumps on me, I find 99% of them on here so disrespectful and/or think that you're in the wrong place because you don't want to be spoken to like a hole that just happens to have a body attached "
Hi do you have any suggestions for other apps or sites you can share? Thanks. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"If you’ve messaged every woman in London then I'm guessing you’ve done a copy and paste job and blasted out tons of generic messages.
That’ll never work with anyone. Just take your time, be authentic. Chill. Don’t rush things and don’t care too much.
My advice would be to take some time out and focus on other things. Fab isn’t that important. Then when you feel ready, come back. Message just a couple of people until you find what works, and take it from there.
Or that based on filters he can’t message everyone so he’s messaged everyone that he can that he’s interested in. Which isn’t that far fetched.
That would still be thousands of people, which is pretty ridiculous within 3 months (the age of his profile)"
Ok I may have exaggerated a little (probably a lot). But I do see a lot of the same profiles, at least the ones I'm interested in. But listening to the advice here, there are a number of things I can do differently. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Ever think maybe some things you should keep to yourself?
Before committing your post to the forum, did you not read through it and think how it might come across to others?
Have you perhaps considered how your post might make you look to others?
Desperate?
Not fussy?
Will shag anything?
Probably found yourself added to a few block lists with that one"
Yes exactly this. You sound like a guy who is just desperate to have sex and any ‘female’ will do. And is surprised no one is interested.
Your profile isn’t the worst but you could do with a few more pics. So it must be the messages you send. I can tell if someone really finds me attractive or just want to hook up with anyone - and the latter is very off putting.
Remember ‘females’ are actually real people who have interests, desires, feelings etc. They are on Fab because of their own interests, not just to please men.
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