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Good messages
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By *t0600 OP Man
over a year ago
elvedon |
Does it really annoy anyone else on here when you write a personalised message to someone where a lot of thought has gone into it and the reply is Hi ? I’d rather not get a reply . Anyone else have this ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does it really annoy anyone else on here when you write a personalised message to someone where a lot of thought has gone into it and the reply is Hi ? I’d rather not get a reply . Anyone else have this ?"
Don’t response to it
Hold yourself to a higher standard |
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By *orny-DJMan
over a year ago
Leigh-on-Sea |
Yep, but it serves as another filter.
If I've gone to the trouble of composing a decent message, asking a couple of questions, just to get a 'Hi' back, it tells me that trying to have a conversation with them will be like trying to get blood out of a stone and that my efforts are better focused elsewhere |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yep, but it serves as another filter.
If I've gone to the trouble of composing a decent message, asking a couple of questions, just to get a 'Hi' back, it tells me that trying to have a conversation with them will be like trying to get blood out of a stone and that my efforts are better focused elsewhere"
If it's someone that doesn't excite me my conversation is terrible. If the replies are shit they just aren't that interested.
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By *t0600 OP Man
over a year ago
elvedon |
"I've never heard of these "good messages".....what am I missing?? x"
Maybe not everyone would class them as good haha but I mean personalised to a profile with thought that’s gone into it . Oppose to the majority of one liners people get |
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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago
Chippenham Malmesbury area |
I only put that much effort in when I'm 99% sure that I'd have a great connection with someone; when I don't get a reply or I get a "No thank you", I'm a little deflated... for a minute or two, then back to browsing. I don't get lucky on here very often but when I do, it's always been worth the wait and disappointment.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We often tend to write too much but when we get the three word answers we know it is time to leave and turn the sign to closed.
If someone cannot make an effort with a message then the chances of them making an effort elsewhere is probably about the same. |
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By *t0600 OP Man
over a year ago
elvedon |
"We often tend to write too much but when we get the three word answers we know it is time to leave and turn the sign to closed.
If someone cannot make an effort with a message then the chances of them making an effort elsewhere is probably about the same. "
Yeah I agree with you . It hasn’t happened recently but a good few times in the past the reply of just Hi . But now as you said I just see it as a time to leave if they can only be arsed to reply with one word |
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By *orny-DJMan
over a year ago
Leigh-on-Sea |
"Yep, but it serves as another filter.
If I've gone to the trouble of composing a decent message, asking a couple of questions, just to get a 'Hi' back, it tells me that trying to have a conversation with them will be like trying to get blood out of a stone and that my efforts are better focused elsewhere
If it's someone that doesn't excite me my conversation is terrible. If the replies are shit they just aren't that interested.
"
Exactly the point I was trying to make |
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I think people have become inherently lazy since the invention of the smart phone
My business works by appointment we book up 3-4 weeks ahead yet due to Google giving you an instant answer people expect to get an instant appointment, same with restaurant bookings. ( and we have all done it) called up on Friday evening trying to get a table and they are full, you get frustrated but you aren’t really frustrated with the restaurant you are frustrated with yourself for not booking earlier
It is a last minute lazy that has been created by the smart phone google and the “instant” answer in your pocket
Hi is just an extension of this |
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By *t0600 OP Man
over a year ago
elvedon |
"It’s when they say on their profile that they love to chat so when they do reply and try and get into a conversation all you get is yes and no answers. That’s not chatting "
Yeah that also happens and people can say maybe there just not interested and that is probably correct but why even bother replying then |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I first joined Fab I found it really difficult to say no to men I wasn't interested in even though they seemed nice men. I'm sure I have been guilty of the one word answers.
I learned that it's much better for everyone if I'm just clear at the outset that I'm not interested. And that's quite apparent from this thread that men much prefer to know where they stand. |
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"I think people have become inherently lazy since the invention of the smart phone
My business works by appointment we book up 3-4 weeks ahead yet due to Google giving you an instant answer people expect to get an instant appointment, same with restaurant bookings. ( and we have all done it) called up on Friday evening trying to get a table and they are full, you get frustrated but you aren’t really frustrated with the restaurant you are frustrated with yourself for not booking earlier
It is a last minute lazy that has been created by the smart phone google and the “instant” answer in your pocket
Hi is just an extension of this "
Nail on head.
Hi.
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By *t0600 OP Man
over a year ago
elvedon |
"When I first joined Fab I found it really difficult to say no to men I wasn't interested in even though they seemed nice men. I'm sure I have been guilty of the one word answers.
I learned that it's much better for everyone if I'm just clear at the outset that I'm not interested. And that's quite apparent from this thread that men much prefer to know where they stand. "
Yeah I get that as in it’s sort of a reply through been polite . But yeah me personally would definitely prefer to know where I stand |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When I first joined Fab I found it really difficult to say no to men I wasn't interested in even though they seemed nice men. I'm sure I have been guilty of the one word answers.
I learned that it's much better for everyone if I'm just clear at the outset that I'm not interested. And that's quite apparent from this thread that men much prefer to know where they stand.
Yeah I get that as in it’s sort of a reply through been polite . But yeah me personally would definitely prefer to know where I stand "
Women are socialised to be polite and kind. When I first joined Fab I answered EVERY message. I had hundreds. Before I learnt to use filters and ignore my "people pleasing" side. I am pretty brutal now because otherwise men think I'm interested when I'm not and I feel like shit.
And I agree - you should know where you stand and one word messages are crap. |
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By *t0600 OP Man
over a year ago
elvedon |
"When I first joined Fab I found it really difficult to say no to men I wasn't interested in even though they seemed nice men. I'm sure I have been guilty of the one word answers.
I learned that it's much better for everyone if I'm just clear at the outset that I'm not interested. And that's quite apparent from this thread that men much prefer to know where they stand.
Yeah I get that as in it’s sort of a reply through been polite . But yeah me personally would definitely prefer to know where I stand
Women are socialised to be polite and kind. When I first joined Fab I answered EVERY message. I had hundreds. Before I learnt to use filters and ignore my "people pleasing" side. I am pretty brutal now because otherwise men think I'm interested when I'm not and I feel like shit.
And I agree - you should know where you stand and one word messages are crap. "
Yeah I would say been a people pleaser on here as a female would take over your life haha . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does it really annoy anyone else on here when you write a personalised message to someone where a lot of thought has gone into it and the reply is Hi ? I’d rather not get a reply . Anyone else have this ?"
The key is not to personalise it, then when you get the one word or no response, just copy and paste it to someone else ..  |
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By *t0600 OP Man
over a year ago
elvedon |
"Does it really annoy anyone else on here when you write a personalised message to someone where a lot of thought has gone into it and the reply is Hi ? I’d rather not get a reply . Anyone else have this ?
The key is not to personalise it, then when you get the one word or no response, just copy and paste it to someone else .. "
And then the chances of a reply are even slimmer haha |
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"Does it really annoy anyone else on here when you write a personalised message to someone where a lot of thought has gone into it and the reply is Hi ? I’d rather not get a reply . Anyone else have this ?"
Be glad you get a reply. Hi is more than nothing. |
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
You've managed to grab their attention if anything then why not just continue the conversation either rule out what was said before and revert to something else... doesn't bother me nothing much does  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I tend to assume they're having multiple conversations and not enough time to respond as either
1) I'm lower down the order or
2)they're not that into me I'm the option or
3) their conversation skilss are pitiful
Its likely I'll disengage after a couple of messages |
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By *t0600 OP Man
over a year ago
elvedon |
"Does it really annoy anyone else on here when you write a personalised message to someone where a lot of thought has gone into it and the reply is Hi ? I’d rather not get a reply . Anyone else have this ?
Be glad you get a reply. Hi is more than nothing."
Im not desperate so I’d rather no reply than a reply that’s taken 1 second |
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"Does it really annoy anyone else on here when you write a personalised message to someone where a lot of thought has gone into it and the reply is Hi ? I’d rather not get a reply . Anyone else have this ?"
It doesn't upset me, rather I accept it as "the way things are", for many reasons out of my control.
Getting "hi" as a reply is better than the usual deadspace (non-reply), a "hi" means you have someone's ear, I usually try to open up the conversation, sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't.
I try to remember we are all different, just because someone doesn't respond as I would, does not mean they are not responding as they feel is best - maybe that well crafted message overwhelmed them, and they don't quite know what to say...? We are all different, so go with the flow (imho) |
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By *t0600 OP Man
over a year ago
elvedon |
"I simply dislike it when I've bothered to write at least 20 sentences and their reply is '' oh right''"
Yeah that’s what I’m getting at some thought and effort and then you get a 1 seconds worth reply |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"When I first joined Fab I found it really difficult to say no to men I wasn't interested in even though they seemed nice men. I'm sure I have been guilty of the one word answers.
I learned that it's much better for everyone if I'm just clear at the outset that I'm not interested. And that's quite apparent from this thread that men much prefer to know where they stand.
Yeah I get that as in it’s sort of a reply through been polite . But yeah me personally would definitely prefer to know where I stand
Women are socialised to be polite and kind. When I first joined Fab I answered EVERY message. I had hundreds. Before I learnt to use filters and ignore my "people pleasing" side. I am pretty brutal now because otherwise men think I'm interested when I'm not and I feel like shit.
And I agree - you should know where you stand and one word messages are crap.
Yeah I would say been a people pleaser on here as a female would take over your life haha . "
I am Sally and I'm a reformed people pleaser  |
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By *t0600 OP Man
over a year ago
elvedon |
"Someone made a form of contact?
Obviously block her. Then call the police.
Don't get laid guys whatever you do lol. pt"
Exactly majority of guys problem on this site think your going to get laid from a Hi  |
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May I surgest you buy a copy
Of my latest book.
Its called woman speak
In we cover all the Meaning
of womens words .from hi to hey. we also especially cover the word fine
when they say this its a warning sign.we actuality have chapter on that one
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By *unchalMan
over a year ago
Dartford |
"Does it really annoy anyone else on here when you write a personalised message to someone where a lot of thought has gone into it and the reply is Hi ? I’d rather not get a reply . Anyone else have this ?"
Not really. It is what it is. If it's a stranger, that's life. If you are on more familiar, friendly, terms, ask them about it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"May I surgest you buy a copy
Of my latest book.
Its called woman speak
In we cover all the Meaning
of womens words .from hi to hey. we also especially cover the word fine
when they say this its a warning sign.we actuality have chapter on that one
"
 |
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"It’s when they say on their profile that they love to chat so when they do reply and try and get into a conversation all you get is yes and no answers. That’s not chatting
Yeah that also happens and people can say maybe there just not interested and that is probably correct but why even bother replying then "
Maybe they were scared that if they don't reply that someone would start a whiney forum thread about them.
1st rule of fab club, you can never win!! |
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By *t0600 OP Man
over a year ago
elvedon |
"It’s when they say on their profile that they love to chat so when they do reply and try and get into a conversation all you get is yes and no answers. That’s not chatting
Yeah that also happens and people can say maybe there just not interested and that is probably correct but why even bother replying then
Maybe they were scared that if they don't reply that someone would start a whiney forum thread about them.
1st rule of fab club, you can never win!!"
Im totally fine with no reply . I understand that women get countless messages here and can’t
answer most of them . Just the one word reply to a thought out message is what gets me but as you say you can probably never win here |
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