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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Having wrongly trusted someone and had my fingers well and truly burnt this past week, I wondered which other Fabbers have got it wrong and if it put them off meeting/swinging at all?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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mistakes are made for a reason, they are there so that we learn from them and dont repeat them .............. u will be fine, shoulders back big smile and move on  |
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been lucky enough to have scorch free fingers so far 
i have had guys who i thought there could be more with but they have gon on to find other people. it hurt at the time but as i hadnt completely staked my claim on them i wasnt actually that hurt at the time. more pissed off that i couldnt have sex with them anymore lol
i even got invited to one of them's wedding |
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By *ickiemintMan
over a year ago
Somewhere NW London |
"Having wrongly trusted someone and had my fingers well and truly burnt this past week, I wondered which other Fabbers have got it wrong and if it put them off meeting/swinging at all? "
Yes, its happened to us. My ex boss and his FB tried to split Su and I up. Thats one reason why he's my ex-boss. The injuries he received didn't help either, but they apparently healed ok.
And i'm normally one of the most laid-back and nice guys you'll meet, but some things are just one step too far. Rich  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ive been lucky really but prior to fabs, i had more than my fingers burnt and through that, i dont do relationships at all.
I try and listen to my instincts ,sixth sense or whatever you call it. And its served me well so far...
If its meant to work, it will |
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wow, a lot of people seem to have experienced some very nasty happenings. I had no idea that it went on. Im sure it would be interesting for many to see some examples of what to look out for etc.
Glad everyone seems to of healed x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There have been people that have made me sit up and think.
But I guess that's the problem here, you can portray yourself in any way you want. It'd the same on dating sites too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This may sound like a very stupid question, but here goes!
How do you get your fingers burnt whilst swinging? Is it because emotions have got in the way? Or that you have confided in someone you thought you could trust? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I met a guy off here about 2 years ago that just turned up at my house one day, to say i was shocked was a understatment as i had never given him my address, it turned out he had followed me home one night when i left the hotel we had met in, i got a taxi and he followed it to see where i lived then just turned up unannounced
If i had been new to this that would have put me off meeting anyone, but as i have been doing this many years i know not all men are like that
It did make me weary after tho and for a while after i started walking home as its easier to notice someone curb crawling at the side of you than noticing a car following you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This may sound like a very stupid question, but here goes!
How do you get your fingers burnt whilst swinging? Is it because emotions have got in the way? Or that you have confided in someone you thought you could trust? "
I started to get feeling and not just friends for someone and told them thinks were starting to get confused and that i thort i might be falling for him so I needed to stop meeting and he said he had feeling for me as well any way turns out I wasn't the only girl he was saying this to and now my head is all over the place because I have been single for 5 year and always thort I was happy single but If I was happy single how the fuck did I fall for him or even let it get that far !!! |
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I fell for someone not long after splitting up with my husband. In fairness to myself I was 44, my husband the only man I'd been with, I was an "innocent abroad". It was an experience I've never forgotten and one that will never be repeated.
I take everything with a pinch of salt, anyone trying to get too close to me I do a background check...turned up a BNP supporter and a "single" man that happened to be pictured after winning a golf tournament...with his wife, to name but two.
The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This may sound like a very stupid question, but here goes!
How do you get your fingers burnt whilst swinging? Is it because emotions have got in the way? Or that you have confided in someone you thought you could trust? "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I fell for someone not long after splitting up with my husband. In fairness to myself I was 44, my husband the only man I'd been with, I was an "innocent abroad". It was an experience I've never forgotten and one that will never be repeated.
I take everything with a pinch of salt, anyone trying to get too close to me I do a background check...turned up a BNP supporter and a "single" man that happened to be pictured after winning a golf tournament...with his wife, to name but two.
The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know. "
And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious  |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"I
The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know. "
Having your fingers burnt... is nt that (sadly) part of life? I mean it happens to us all in one way or another. Some are particularly unfortunate, I agree...
Either way... I agree with the poster above.. to try and not let a bad experience cloud our judgment of the next experience - otherwise we may miss some nice opportunities? |
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"I fell for someone not long after splitting up with my husband. In fairness to myself I was 44, my husband the only man I'd been with, I was an "innocent abroad". It was an experience I've never forgotten and one that will never be repeated.
I take everything with a pinch of salt, anyone trying to get too close to me I do a background check...turned up a BNP supporter and a "single" man that happened to be pictured after winning a golf tournament...with his wife, to name but two.
The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know.
And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious "
I would not associate with a BNP supporter they have their _iews and I have mine.. I just don't agree with theirs so why associate with someone you have nothing in common with.. |
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"This may sound like a very stupid question, but here goes!
How do you get your fingers burnt whilst swinging? Is it because emotions have got in the way? Or that you have confided in someone you thought you could trust? "
Misread the op, thought it was meeting in general. That said, same could apply if you meet regularly one on one and you believe you're the only one I can see how that happens with singles.
Don't know how couples get in that situation though. |
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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago
Livingston |
"This may sound like a very stupid question, but here goes!
How do you get your fingers burnt whilst swinging? Is it because emotions have got in the way? Or that you have confided in someone you thought you could trust? "
A bit of both. |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
I have said it many times before, I will say it again.
Some people come into swinging at their most vulnerable, share their woes for all to see, their achilles heel and there are folks who will say all the right things to maximise their opportunity for some form of gain.....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I fell for someone not long after splitting up with my husband. In fairness to myself I was 44, my husband the only man I'd been with, I was an "innocent abroad". It was an experience I've never forgotten and one that will never be repeated.
I take everything with a pinch of salt, anyone trying to get too close to me I do a background check...turned up a BNP supporter and a "single" man that happened to be pictured after winning a golf tournament...with his wife, to name but two.
The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know.
And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious
I would not associate with a BNP supporter they have their _iews and I have mine.. I just don't agree with theirs so why associate with someone you have nothing in common with.. "
ive known people not meet because they support different football teams ffs lol |
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"I fell for someone not long after splitting up with my husband. In fairness to myself I was 44, my husband the only man I'd been with, I was an "innocent abroad". It was an experience I've never forgotten and one that will never be repeated.
I take everything with a pinch of salt, anyone trying to get too close to me I do a background check...turned up a BNP supporter and a "single" man that happened to be pictured after winning a golf tournament...with his wife, to name but two.
The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know.
And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious
I would not associate with a BNP supporter they have their _iews and I have mine.. I just don't agree with theirs so why associate with someone you have nothing in common with..
ive known people not meet because they support different football teams ffs lol"
I don't support any football team so I am ok there... |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious "
I struggle to spend time with Conservative voters so finding out someone was BNP would be a dealbreaker for me.
If someone doesn't make their political _iews obvious then no problem, but quite a few people do unfortunately. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" I Can normally read people well .. maybe my pride was hurt not sure really. But did upset me trusting and being let down."
It's hard isn't it.
I have had someone fool me. But you can not let one bad apple spoil the barrel. X |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"This may sound like a very stupid question, but here goes!
How do you get your fingers burnt whilst swinging? Is it because emotions have got in the way? Or that you have confided in someone you thought you could trust?
A bit of both."
Yep....and much too quickly too. Lessons learnt though |
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A lot of the situations described happen in all walks of life, work colleagues, friends, relatives, they can all take your trust and betray you, its not just 'swing' relationships where it happens. I think the answe is how you react to it and deal with it, and you cant react or deal until you have experienced it. So treat every 'hurdle' as a learning curve and dont let it get you down.
We all have burned fingers, but scars heal. xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A lot of the situations described happen in all walks of life, work colleagues, friends, relatives, they can all take your trust and betray you, its not just 'swing' relationships where it happens. I think the answe is how you react to it and deal with it, and you cant react or deal until you have experienced it. So treat every 'hurdle' as a learning curve and dont let it get you down.
We all have burned fingers, but scars heal. xx "
its takes time scars to heal and you find yourself asking why .. when you don't know answers to things can drive you nuts. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious
Erm .... do you know the bnp's _iews if so clearly she wouldn't to be involved with them!!!"
Why 'clearly' she wouldn't be involved in them?... One persons political _iews should never be assumed based on ones own ignorance.  |
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"I fell for someone not long after splitting up with my husband. In fairness to myself I was 44, my husband the only man I'd been with, I was an "innocent abroad". It was an experience I've never forgotten and one that will never be repeated.
I take everything with a pinch of salt, anyone trying to get too close to me I do a background check...turned up a BNP supporter and a "single" man that happened to be pictured after winning a golf tournament...with his wife, to name but two.
The trick is not allowing these experiences to make us bitter and jaded and hold everyone at arms length...easier said than done I know.
And what is wrong with supporting the BNP?...why should political _iews put you off?...just curious
I would not associate with a BNP supporter they have their _iews and I have mine.. I just don't agree with theirs so why associate with someone you have nothing in common with.. "
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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago
Over the rainbow, under the bridge |
Not had any issues really since I started meeting. If I think someone is a bit too clingy or 'into' me they are gone.
I'm here for fun and nothing else. And I make that brutally clear. |
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