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Being on Fab...
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
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I was talking to a person this morning about changing. How Fab has helped me discover parts of my sexuality, being poly...
Has being on Fab changed you? Whether it's in a positive way in terms of growth, acceptance, friendships, relationships or the negative - wariness, increased cynicism. You get the idea.
Have you found that over time what you're looking for has changed? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was talking to a person this morning about changing. How Fab has helped me discover parts of my sexuality, being poly...
Has being on Fab changed you? Whether it's in a positive way in terms of growth, acceptance, friendships, relationships or the negative - wariness, increased cynicism. You get the idea.
Have you found that over time what you're looking for has changed? "
Simply.. No.
Thing is op no one knows people behind a screen. Unless you meet in reality because op how would I know you in the first instance without knowing you.
A platform like this is not for me changing my whatevers.
Again.. Folks say.. Honest, genuine etc we do not know each other well enough on here to believe words on a screen. If we meet folks then and only can honesty be verified or genuine.
If I said anything about me op you don't know me in real life so going on my word on a screen is I believe hard to sustain when many of us do not know each other in real life. Hope that makes sense.
All I know is that fab does not change me, my attitude or anything op.
Hope you had a good birthday op  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm not really on it this morning to give a deep introspection on what Fab has done for me so I'll just sum it up by saying sometimes maybe good, sometimes maybe shit |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s changed me insofar as allowing me to explore avenues of my sexuality that I’d kept hidden away in a box, and being able to embrace them in a (relatively) judgement free environment.
It’s also afforded the opportunity to both my wife and I, the exploration of being intimate with other people, in an open and honest way.
All things I wouldn’t have imagined possible had we not discovered Fab.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’d say in general fabs has left me worse off
It’s made me realise/think that in a purely physical/sexual way I’m just not that desirable to most women
I’m lucky that I’m successful through my personality and lifestyle etc
But I won’t lie, it’s not a nice realisation |
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For me fab has changed my views on relationships, for example I don’t think I could ever go back to a monogamous relationship again. It’s also helped me discover things I like, thing I love and some things that just aren’t for me. |
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"It’s changed me insofar as allowing me to explore avenues of my sexuality that I’d kept hidden away in a box, and being able to embrace them in a (relatively) judgement free environment.
It’s also afforded the opportunity to both my wife and I, the exploration of being intimate with other people, in an open and honest way.
All things I wouldn’t have imagined possible had we not discovered Fab.
"
totally agree with this |
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Fab came at a time when I was really at a cross roads in my life. My life had been turned upside. My wife had cheated on me, seperated from me and left me literally holding the baby and a toddler. However as dark and confusing and scary times are I also realised this was a great opportunity start a fresh and do things my way. Learn about who I am rather than trying to mask and fit into a hole that wasn't shaped for me. Also I've lived so long trying to please others it was time prioritise my desires.
My friend gave me some advice she was given when she split from her girlfriend. That advise was go get laid and do it now. On the surface some may not think rebound sex is a great idea but she was completely right. I did and it really helped. I had felt so worthless for so long and it was a great feeling to know your desired, you have value and others want to accept you physically. Plus nice to know you still have it. Although I didn't want a relationship I craved human interaction with a woman, I craved intimacy and I craved sex. Not so easy when you're a single parent. And that is where the Internet came in. Online dating opened a wealth of other women in the boat I could find the NSA interaction and intimacy I was looking for.
And this is where fab comes along. I always couldn't understand the logic of why people in a relationship couldn't enjoy sex and intimacy with others outside of the relationship. To me that always seemed sad but they were the rules and I stuck to them (unlike the ex). I questioned what I wanted from relationships going forward and I've always liked the idea sexual variety and sex in groups of 3 or more. I found fab and this was awesome. There was the possibility to seek what I wanted as a single and I was inspired going forwards by the couples and others doing relationships another way. I also had the freedom to explore my other sexual desires in BDSM. I've always had an intrest in rope (which I find interesting and beautiful) and (now unashamedly and openly) playfully sadistic in nature BDSM wise. Not that this site is for that specifically but there was definitely some food for thought and sign posts in the right direction on the forums.
Then Fab lead to clubs. As someone who likes to be social but is a complete social weirdo who struggles with social cues, being sensory overwhelmed and prone to social burn out it was a bit of a challenge. However nothing happens if you don't get stuck in. So I started going to clubs and putting the work in. It's really help with my confidence and social skills. The more you do something the better you are. Simply I'm better at approaching stranges and sparking up conversations (in clubs and the outside world). And it also introduced me to a scene I love.
It's no question that Fab is hard work for single guys but it's over all been good. Over my time as a single guy I was fairly successful. I met some great women and had some really positive experiences and small friendships. This has helped me explore what I want and I have been enriched by many of those interactions.
Fab basically was a key part of me growing into my own skin and finding a lifestyle I love. It also helped to be be a naturist. To be confident and comfortable literally in my own skin around others (which in tern naturism has really helped with my personal development). I feel a lot more free. I'm more confident, self assured and comfortable being open about my desires and seeking them. It's also helped me to own and celebrate my weirdness and depravities. I just also learnt so much from fab and the scene, its quite an education. Plus lots of great experiences, memories and freinds along the way.
And just like a JML advert that's not all. Because of FAB I found My Girl. She truly is my best everything. She's the one I fancy like crazy, my best freind, my best drinking buddy, my closes confidante, my lover, my soul mate. I never thought I could be anything other than a square peg in a round hole. Yet our combined weirdness is perfectly shaped to slot together perfectly. She is made for me and that's something that I never thought possible. If it weren't for fab we wouldn't have met and had all the great adventures we've had and yet to have. We would have the awesome family we have now. So the most important thing fab has given is Mrs Misfit and that alone make it worth me starting on FAB all that time ago worth it a million times over.
(Or I could have just condensed to above to yes, its worked great for me thank you)
Mr |
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I have certainly changed over the past few years and fab/CNM has been part of that.
As a single guy on here it is easy to become bitter or cynical. I have certainly become toughened. The whole journey has made me realise that I needed to be a lot better at communicating in relationships. In mono culture a lot can be left unsaid. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I was talking to a person this morning about changing. How Fab has helped me discover parts of my sexuality, being poly...
Has being on Fab changed you? Whether it's in a positive way in terms of growth, acceptance, friendships, relationships or the negative - wariness, increased cynicism. You get the idea.
Have you found that over time what you're looking for has changed? "
Fab was an eye opener tbh, not everyone says or does what they really mean ,l had to out the time wasters, which in real life you wouldn't have anything to do with anyway but here you don't know until push comes to shove , but l have found that it's as good a place as any to find your soulmate... someone that's on the same wavelength as you . |
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To some extent: To steal a phrase It's given me the language to describe what I already knew. There's an element of that going on.
Changed what I am looking for? Let's say I am clearer on the subject of what I am not looking for.
I've made a couple of good friends, whom I appreciate very much. That sticks for me and I smile writing it.
Made me more cynical?  'best not to go there.' Anon |
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Being here for almost 8 years hasn't changed anything in regard to sexual exploration or thoughts.
Real life has created a huge speed bump the last few years but fab had never been more than a passing distraction or hobby right from day one anyway.
The only thing that has changed is my cynicism.
I've always had to deal with shallow two faced people but this site highlights how low some people are prepared to stoop in the name of popularity.
It used to annoy me but now I find it funny because I can see the carcrash long before it happens. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Been good for my point journey. It’s been really nice meeting non monogamous people. I’ve made some lovely connections. Some haven’t worked out. I’ve not explored much but that’s on me. I’m still young though. And there’s much more for me to do before I delete my account for good. But remember, I’ll be well under 50 when I do. |
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It's definitely changed things for me both positive and negative.
The positive - me and the Mr are able to communicate things so much easier than before, we aren't afraid of the others judgement because there isn't any, our sex life has improved overall because we are more open with each other.
I've been able to expand on my bi curiosity that I've always wanted to try, I'm no longer curious which is amazing & I've met some absolutely brilliant people.
I also get to look at boobs daily and chat daily to people I'd have never met in the vanilla world.
The negatives - I'm more put off men than ever, the unsolicited dicks in the inbox the total disrespect of women when they can't take a no thank you, the any holes a goal crew that expect you to be flattered that they've complimented you along with 100 other people that day.
The level of self entitlement among well the whole range of members here, men, women, couples some seem to think because your here they are entitled to fuck you, this isn't the case!
The huge double standards bug me.
And lastly the broken trust when you send private messages, photos, real names and some think that it's absolutely fine to share this in a group chat with others, what sad and pathetic lives they must lead to break someone's trust like that just to try and show off their popularity.
The negatives ATM are outweighing the positives so much so I no longer look to meet on here or take part in certain posts.
Mrs |
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Difficult question. I've never been comfortable with my body but you have to have some pictures on your profile so I bit the bullet and took some. My attitude to myself hasn't changed but I suppose I now know I can take chest shots that appeal to some people.
I know that I'm very oral-focused but I don't think that was because of Fab particularly, I think a few things pointed me to valuing cunnilingus over all other aspects of sex.
I have had new experiences, primarily of a sexual partner who squirted, and I found out how hot that can be.
Aside from that, I think the main thing it has done is make me more open to discussing sex which I hadn't done much of before, but now I enjoy it a lot. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I
Has being on Fab changed you? Whether it's in a positive way in terms of growth, acceptance, friendships, relationships or the negative - wariness, increased cynicism.…
"
Hell yeh it has. We are a throw away commodity in a throw away world.
Whatever sex you are there is always a better option. And it’s quick to see when you are no longer needed. My friends list changes regularly.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Before joining fab I was bordering on drifting into being asexual, or more accurately not seeing myself as a sexual person or sexually attractive or interesting. I’m not sure if it’s helped tbh, but maybe turning 50 and just being disillusioned isn’t helping either. |
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I found fab a very long time ago while doing research for a university essay I choose to leave it out of the the research notes after finding the bulk of the users to be real people and scrubbed the account.
I became a proper member not long after and the only thing I've found that has changed in me since joining fab is my absolute distan for people who are fake in there intentions or abuse the systems in place to avoid such. I've seen the site grow to a great community and I hate it when people take advantage of it.
|
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"Fab came at a time when I was really at a cross roads in my life. My life had been turned upside. My wife had cheated on me, seperated from me and left me literally holding the baby and a toddler. However as dark and confusing and scary times are I also realised this was a great opportunity start a fresh and do things my way. Learn about who I am rather than trying to mask and fit into a hole that wasn't shaped for me. Also I've lived so long trying to please others it was time prioritise my desires.
My friend gave me some advice she was given when she split from her girlfriend. That advise was go get laid and do it now. On the surface some may not think rebound sex is a great idea but she was completely right. I did and it really helped. I had felt so worthless for so long and it was a great feeling to know your desired, you have value and others want to accept you physically. Plus nice to know you still have it. Although I didn't want a relationship I craved human interaction with a woman, I craved intimacy and I craved sex. Not so easy when you're a single parent. And that is where the Internet came in. Online dating opened a wealth of other women in the boat I could find the NSA interaction and intimacy I was looking for.
And this is where fab comes along. I always couldn't understand the logic of why people in a relationship couldn't enjoy sex and intimacy with others outside of the relationship. To me that always seemed sad but they were the rules and I stuck to them (unlike the ex). I questioned what I wanted from relationships going forward and I've always liked the idea sexual variety and sex in groups of 3 or more. I found fab and this was awesome. There was the possibility to seek what I wanted as a single and I was inspired going forwards by the couples and others doing relationships another way. I also had the freedom to explore my other sexual desires in BDSM. I've always had an intrest in rope (which I find interesting and beautiful) and (now unashamedly and openly) playfully sadistic in nature BDSM wise. Not that this site is for that specifically but there was definitely some food for thought and sign posts in the right direction on the forums.
Then Fab lead to clubs. As someone who likes to be social but is a complete social weirdo who struggles with social cues, being sensory overwhelmed and prone to social burn out it was a bit of a challenge. However nothing happens if you don't get stuck in. So I started going to clubs and putting the work in. It's really help with my confidence and social skills. The more you do something the better you are. Simply I'm better at approaching stranges and sparking up conversations (in clubs and the outside world). And it also introduced me to a scene I love.
It's no question that Fab is hard work for single guys but it's over all been good. Over my time as a single guy I was fairly successful. I met some great women and had some really positive experiences and small friendships. This has helped me explore what I want and I have been enriched by many of those interactions.
Fab basically was a key part of me growing into my own skin and finding a lifestyle I love. It also helped to be be a naturist. To be confident and comfortable literally in my own skin around others (which in tern naturism has really helped with my personal development). I feel a lot more free. I'm more confident, self assured and comfortable being open about my desires and seeking them. It's also helped me to own and celebrate my weirdness and depravities. I just also learnt so much from fab and the scene, its quite an education. Plus lots of great experiences, memories and freinds along the way.
And just like a JML advert that's not all. Because of FAB I found My Girl. She truly is my best everything. She's the one I fancy like crazy, my best freind, my best drinking buddy, my closes confidante, my lover, my soul mate. I never thought I could be anything other than a square peg in a round hole. Yet our combined weirdness is perfectly shaped to slot together perfectly. She is made for me and that's something that I never thought possible. If it weren't for fab we wouldn't have met and had all the great adventures we've had and yet to have. We would have the awesome family we have now. So the most important thing fab has given is Mrs Misfit and that alone make it worth me starting on FAB all that time ago worth it a million times over.
(Or I could have just condensed to above to yes, its worked great for me thank you)
Mr"
Well I'm glad you didn't keep it aboet. What a lovely post. Thank you for sharing
Ms Dot |
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By *AABMan
over a year ago
Not far |
I was introduced to Fab by a woman I chatted to in a club 6 years ago. I go through phases of logging on and then months where I have other stuff to do. It hasn’t changed me; just shown me that I’m only an onlooker, looking through a window into a world in which a small number of people are apparently having a great time. |
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I think being on Fab has changed me. It’s made me more accepting of myself physically and made me more bold when it comes to showing off my body. I really struggled with body image before I joined, so it’s given me that which is a huge positive.
I’ve also met some wonderful people through Fab that I wouldn’t otherwise have crossed paths with. Their influence has changed me and I’m definitely a different person for knowing them.
Unfortunately it’s made me less likely to ever consider a conventional relationship again, which is sad. I’ve seen so many people on here lying and cheating and living completely double lives that I don’t think I’d ever fully trust anyone to not do the same. Having endured the torment of a cheating partner once I wouldn’t ever want to go there again. Fab has opened my eyes to how prevalent cheating is and so I think that’s probably it for me. I don’t want to take the risk. |
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"I was talking to a person this morning about changing. How Fab has helped me discover parts of my sexuality, being poly...
Has being on Fab changed you? Whether it's in a positive way in terms of growth, acceptance, friendships, relationships or the negative - wariness, increased cynicism. You get the idea.
Have you found that over time what you're looking for has changed? "
I like your profile pic - very attractive!
Iv gained some friendships from here and experienced some new activities. It requires you to develop a thick skin especially if feelings are present for that particular friend, but when you get a meet the other person has to experience that too. Fab Can open more doors for you to explore and experience new ideas/dreams.
Some contributors pics are super hot and show the general and the intimate kind. Iv a good few on hotlist I quiet like alot  |
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