FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you mind?
Do you mind?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
I sometimes question myself. I feel like maybe I’m being a bit sensitive and snowflakey. Obviously I snap out of it but I’m keen to hear other perspectives. Particularly of those that don’t really care what someone likes/ desires them for I guess.
I’m off work today so doing some thinking. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I hope people like me. The reasons they like me are for them to decide.
In general I think I'm nice person who is kind and caring.
Hopefully others see that too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
I sometimes question myself. I feel like maybe I’m being a bit sensitive and snowflakey. Obviously I snap out of it but I’m keen to hear other perspectives. Particularly of those that don’t really care what someone likes/ desires them for I guess.
I’m off work today so doing some thinking. "
Morning op
Try not to do to much thinking it can turn into over thinking |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
I sometimes question myself. I feel like maybe I’m being a bit sensitive and snowflakey. Obviously I snap out of it but I’m keen to hear other perspectives. Particularly of those that don’t really care what someone likes/ desires them for I guess.
I’m off work today so doing some thinking. "
People like me for me and nothing else. If they cannot accept me for me it is how life is op |
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On fab unless you're among the people with the opportunity to meet regularly on a social basis physical or chronological characteristics are all you have to go on initially. I hope after an initial meeting people might find me personally attractive as well as physically but most of us can mask for a few hours.
Away from fab I really hope the people I choose to mix with like me, it's a small enough group as it is. |
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I don't really mind, not everyone is going to like everyone else and that's just part of life.
Do I like being liked just because they want a shag and nothing more absolutely not, it does make me feel like an object and not a person, it's not flattering when any holes a goal.
Mrs |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"I think that a lot of people court approval via their physical features though. "
That's human nature though.
People 'like' to be considered attractive and desired. But that doesn't take into account personality at all.
Looks will only get you so far, unless People are just after a conversationless, purely physical interaction. But some are happy with that of course. |
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By *nitterWoman
over a year ago
the land of tall tales and yarn |
I'm a grower or at least that's how my friends describe me, as in you'll grow to like her 
I really don't mind, those that like me have taken the time to appreciate my total awesomeness  |
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"I think that a lot of people court approval via their physical features though.
That's human nature though.
People 'like' to be considered attractive and desired. But that doesn't take into account personality at all.
Looks will only get you so far, unless People are just after a conversationless, purely physical interaction. But some are happy with that of course."
It surely is human nature. Otherwise we'd all have one candid photo and verifications attesting to our charity work and kitten rescuing abilities  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I want people to like me for me, but if it is purely for a one off smash sesh then I suppose I can live with them liking me for my appearance.
I would be sad to know people have befriended me and they have little interest other than my looks, but that's only a concern on Fab really and I don't trust easily when it comes to people on here saying that they like me. I'm pretty confident most I socialise with in the real world like me for me. |
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"I don’t think I’ve ever really put much thought into it. I like me. The people that matter to me like me. May seem odd but I’m not really that bothered about anyone else really. "
I'm of a similar mind. I like to think that I'm more than just a body to the people I engage with sexually but that's 99% social conditioning. Intellectually I know they can't possibly know the real me |
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I am completely comfortable with only being wanted for a specific characteristic, purpose or whatever.
My life is full of people who think I'm a decent enough guy. It'd be nice to be a sex object for a change! |
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Some thoughts.
1. All initial attraction is superficial. Even when no visual clues are provided. Unless you know someone personally and deeply, attraction/liking is mostly based on assumptions and projections.
2. My physical attributes are a part of me, whether I like it or not. Some of them I have cultivated and others I have little control over. My looks are not for everyone so when people appreciate them it is nice. For me personally, it is enjoyable even when it is sexualised and/or objectifying (I do have my limits though). My physical attributes is not all I am, but not everyone has to appreciate all I am, or any of it, it is all a bonus.
3. Getting to know someone deeply is not that common, so what does "like me for me" mean? At best it means that their assumptions about me are on track with how I see myself. Ie. Their assumptions and projections are on the mark, so they validate my sense of self.
Despite everything I've written though... wanting to be acknowledged and understood for your authentic self is not something I'd seek to suppress OP. Don't get too cross at those who can't or won't, but by all means keep on snowflaking  |
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I don't care to be someone's fetish. I used to get a lot of messages from young guys wanting me to play mummy. I can't do anything about my age, but I don't want that to be the only thing someone meets me for.
Same thing with being fat. I've had messages from guys who just want fat - the fatter the better - and they don't give a shiny shite about anything else. I'm afraid it's a huge turn-off for me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On Fab, for many my likeability is based on solely a physical attraction. I’m not bothered. I have zero control over what others think of me. I can’t go around living life based on how others view me. It doesn’t mean that majority comprises those I end up playing with. I’m confident play partners have found me more than just physically attractive, and it is evident in our connection. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't care to be someone's fetish. I used to get a lot of messages from young guys wanting me to play mummy. I can't do anything about my age, but I don't want that to be the only thing someone meets me for.
Same thing with being fat. I've had messages from guys who just want fat - the fatter the better - and they don't give a shiny shite about anything else. I'm afraid it's a huge turn-off for me."
Same. This is my feeling. I here possible I avoid people that give off these vibes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's really important to me that people don't "like" me just for my body. Mainly why I have so few pics. I'm not interested in guys who want to sleep with me because of my boobs. |
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Not to get all philosophical, but what is 'me'? I'm just a sum of my (inner and outer) parts. I guess I'm implicitly accepting the physicalist explanation of mind/consciousness.
Anyway, I don't mind at all. I'm happy if they like whatever they do about me. I'd be miserable if I wanted people to like *everything* about me. It'd also contradict something I think and have said before - the only person who can tolerate all of me is myself  |
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By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago
Chinese Takeaway near you |
Great question OP 
Yes it would be nice if people liked me for more than just my handsome looks & fabulous charisma haha
But in general (world off fab) unless they family or friends I don’t really care if people genuinely like me. Long as treat me with dignity & respect like they would like to be treated then we good. I’m bit of a tough nut |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Tbh as I’ve got older I’ve given less and less fucks about what other people think as long as I’m happy with me and I’m happy that I’m doing the right things in the right way.
Some randomer off t’internet disapproves? Who cares?  |
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"Not to get all philosophical, but what is 'me'? I'm just a sum of my (inner and outer) parts. I guess I'm implicitly accepting the physicalist explanation of mind/consciousness.
Anyway, I don't mind at all. I'm happy if they like whatever they do about me. I'd be miserable if I wanted people to like *everything* about me. It'd also contradict something I think and have said before - the only person who can tolerate all of me is myself "
Rare I come across anyone who considers 'the hard problem' even psychiatrists. What is your view on what consciousness is? A trick the brain plays on itself, when it reaches a certain level of complexity?
Your next paragraph made me smile. I think it is a challenge too, accepting oneself; not simply a choice. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People only pretend to like me because I'm a wet hole with big boobs. Or to try and get gossip from me or use me to do stuff for them at work. No point being bothered by it. |
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I find this hard to answer, because I am not sure I relate to the process of breaking things down to their constituent parts. Or I am not sure it is beneficial.
As an example. I like a flower, I may find its petals appealling: if I pull off a petal - then it is not the same sensation. How many petals do I need to pull off before it ceases to be a flower?
When I can experience myself in that way, warts and all (so to speak) then I tend to experience others holistically too. Which creates the conditions for connection, at least the part I can play in that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I find this hard to answer, because I am not sure I relate to the process of breaking things down to their constituent parts. Or I am not sure it is beneficial.
As an example. I like a flower, I may find its petals appealling: if I pull off a petal - then it is not the same sensation. How many petals do I need to pull off before it ceases to be a flower?
When I can experience myself in that way, warts and all (so to speak) then I tend to experience others holistically too. Which creates the conditions for connection, at least the part I can play in that."
I like this analogy. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"People only pretend to like me because I'm a wet hole with big boobs. Or to try and get gossip from me or use me to do stuff for them at work. No point being bothered by it. "
At least you’re still a wet hole at your age |
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If it’s someone I like and respect, yes. Others - I couldn’t give a stuff.
If some random on fab messages saying how beautiful and amazing I am based solely on a few pics of my boobs and bum, it doesn’t bother me either way. They haven’t engaged with me as a person, I’m just fulfilling a 2D fantasy at that particular point in time - along with however many other women whose pictures they’ve looked at. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People only pretend to like me because I'm a wet hole with big boobs. Or to try and get gossip from me or use me to do stuff for them at work. No point being bothered by it.
At least you’re still a wet hole at your age "
I take umbrage at that comment. Not sure why.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"People only pretend to like me because I'm a wet hole with big boobs. Or to try and get gossip from me or use me to do stuff for them at work. No point being bothered by it.
At least you’re still a wet hole at your age
I take umbrage at that comment. Not sure why. "
It was a terrible comment I apologise x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People only pretend to like me because I'm a wet hole with big boobs. Or to try and get gossip from me or use me to do stuff for them at work. No point being bothered by it.
At least you’re still a wet hole at your age
I take umbrage at that comment. Not sure why.
It was a terrible comment I apologise x"
It was to Outsider actshually. I'm just being a nob cos I'm ancient  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"People only pretend to like me because I'm a wet hole with big boobs. Or to try and get gossip from me or use me to do stuff for them at work. No point being bothered by it.
At least you’re still a wet hole at your age
I take umbrage at that comment. Not sure why.
It was a terrible comment I apologise x
It was to Outsider actshually. I'm just being a nob cos I'm ancient "
I know it was haha. I’m apologising for the offence I caused x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People only pretend to like me because I'm a wet hole with big boobs. Or to try and get gossip from me or use me to do stuff for them at work. No point being bothered by it.
At least you’re still a wet hole at your age
I take umbrage at that comment. Not sure why.
It was a terrible comment I apologise x
It was to Outsider actshually. I'm just being a nob cos I'm ancient
I know it was haha. I’m apologising for the offence I caused x "
She'd probably laugh too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People only pretend to like me because I'm a wet hole with big boobs. Or to try and get gossip from me or use me to do stuff for them at work. No point being bothered by it.
At least you’re still a wet hole at your age "
Barely. But men don't care what they fuck. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People only pretend to like me because I'm a wet hole with big boobs. Or to try and get gossip from me or use me to do stuff for them at work. No point being bothered by it.
At least you’re still a wet hole at your age
Barely. But men don't care what they fuck. "
I'm not offended. |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
I want my people to like me because of who I am and others not to be too offended.
Being told I have a gorgeous cock does nothing , it’s a cock I didn’t make it , it’s am insult actually if that’s the best compliment someone has, they are not for me |
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"Not to get all philosophical, but what is 'me'? I'm just a sum of my (inner and outer) parts. I guess I'm implicitly accepting the physicalist explanation of mind/consciousness.
Anyway, I don't mind at all. I'm happy if they like whatever they do about me. I'd be miserable if I wanted people to like *everything* about me. It'd also contradict something I think and have said before - the only person who can tolerate all of me is myself
Rare I come across anyone who considers 'the hard problem' even psychiatrists. What is your view on what consciousness is? A trick the brain plays on itself, when it reaches a certain level of complexity?
Your next paragraph made me smile. I think it is a challenge too, accepting oneself; not simply a choice."
I'll start off by saying this is how I view the world - it's a philosophical position I resonate with most and there's no right or wrong.
It's easier to say what it's not - I don't accept the soul/spiritual aspects from religion(s) and the psychoanalytic conscious/sub-conscious/un-conscious babble from Freud and Jung (it's pseudoscience imo). I prefer the naturalist/physicalist position - consciousness is just the name we've given to the electrical impulses in our brain that make us feel ourselves. And I don't think humans are unique in that - we're just like all other animals, and thus, by extension, they're conscious too. The brain doesn't need to play any tricks, even if we are in a simulation, accepting that we 'exist' is still perfectly valid. Consciousness is just a side effect of brain evolution is what my answer would be I guess. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not to get all philosophical, but what is 'me'? I'm just a sum of my (inner and outer) parts. I guess I'm implicitly accepting the physicalist explanation of mind/consciousness.
Anyway, I don't mind at all. I'm happy if they like whatever they do about me. I'd be miserable if I wanted people to like *everything* about me. It'd also contradict something I think and have said before - the only person who can tolerate all of me is myself
Rare I come across anyone who considers 'the hard problem' even psychiatrists. What is your view on what consciousness is? A trick the brain plays on itself, when it reaches a certain level of complexity?
Your next paragraph made me smile. I think it is a challenge too, accepting oneself; not simply a choice.
I'll start off by saying this is how I view the world - it's a philosophical position I resonate with most and there's no right or wrong.
It's easier to say what it's not - I don't accept the soul/spiritual aspects from religion(s) and the psychoanalytic conscious/sub-conscious/un-conscious babble from Freud and Jung (it's pseudoscience imo). I prefer the naturalist/physicalist position - consciousness is just the name we've given to the electrical impulses in our brain that make us feel ourselves. And I don't think humans are unique in that - we're just like all other animals, and thus, by extension, they're conscious too. The brain doesn't need to play any tricks, even if we are in a simulation, accepting that we 'exist' is still perfectly valid. Consciousness is just a side effect of brain evolution is what my answer would be I guess."
I...erm..  didn't understand any of that. Where's Hansoffate? |
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"Not to get all philosophical, but what is 'me'? I'm just a sum of my (inner and outer) parts. I guess I'm implicitly accepting the physicalist explanation of mind/consciousness.
Anyway, I don't mind at all. I'm happy if they like whatever they do about me. I'd be miserable if I wanted people to like *everything* about me. It'd also contradict something I think and have said before - the only person who can tolerate all of me is myself
Rare I come across anyone who considers 'the hard problem' even psychiatrists. What is your view on what consciousness is? A trick the brain plays on itself, when it reaches a certain level of complexity?
Your next paragraph made me smile. I think it is a challenge too, accepting oneself; not simply a choice.
I'll start off by saying this is how I view the world - it's a philosophical position I resonate with most and there's no right or wrong.
It's easier to say what it's not - I don't accept the soul/spiritual aspects from religion(s) and the psychoanalytic conscious/sub-conscious/un-conscious babble from Freud and Jung (it's pseudoscience imo). I prefer the naturalist/physicalist position - consciousness is just the name we've given to the electrical impulses in our brain that make us feel ourselves. And I don't think humans are unique in that - we're just like all other animals, and thus, by extension, they're conscious too. The brain doesn't need to play any tricks, even if we are in a simulation, accepting that we 'exist' is still perfectly valid. Consciousness is just a side effect of brain evolution is what my answer would be I guess.
I...erm.. didn't understand any of that. Where's Hansoffate? "
Haha, I'm sorry Sally, I've become accustomed to reading (and I guess using) jargon.
The psychoanalytic part - you don't need to understand it - I don't think the people who made it up understood it either!
Physicalism is the view that the only things that exist are physical things. |
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By *EAT..85Woman
over a year ago
Nottingham |
Sometimes I get frustrated with guys when they realise how kinky I am and that's all they then want to talk about/do. But I'm pretty blunt these days and will tell them there's more to me and the chat than that. |
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By *unchalMan
over a year ago
Dartford |
"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
I sometimes question myself. I feel like maybe I’m being a bit sensitive and snowflakey. Obviously I snap out of it but I’m keen to hear other perspectives. Particularly of those that don’t really care what someone likes/ desires them for I guess.
I’m off work today so doing some thinking. "
No. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not to get all philosophical, but what is 'me'? I'm just a sum of my (inner and outer) parts. I guess I'm implicitly accepting the physicalist explanation of mind/consciousness.
Anyway, I don't mind at all. I'm happy if they like whatever they do about me. I'd be miserable if I wanted people to like *everything* about me. It'd also contradict something I think and have said before - the only person who can tolerate all of me is myself
Rare I come across anyone who considers 'the hard problem' even psychiatrists. What is your view on what consciousness is? A trick the brain plays on itself, when it reaches a certain level of complexity?
Your next paragraph made me smile. I think it is a challenge too, accepting oneself; not simply a choice.
I'll start off by saying this is how I view the world - it's a philosophical position I resonate with most and there's no right or wrong.
It's easier to say what it's not - I don't accept the soul/spiritual aspects from religion(s) and the psychoanalytic conscious/sub-conscious/un-conscious babble from Freud and Jung (it's pseudoscience imo). I prefer the naturalist/physicalist position - consciousness is just the name we've given to the electrical impulses in our brain that make us feel ourselves. And I don't think humans are unique in that - we're just like all other animals, and thus, by extension, they're conscious too. The brain doesn't need to play any tricks, even if we are in a simulation, accepting that we 'exist' is still perfectly valid. Consciousness is just a side effect of brain evolution is what my answer would be I guess.
I...erm.. didn't understand any of that. Where's Hansoffate?
Haha, I'm sorry Sally, I've become accustomed to reading (and I guess using) jargon.
The psychoanalytic part - you don't need to understand it - I don't think the people who made it up understood it either!
Physicalism is the view that the only things that exist are physical things."
As long as you and Hans understand! I will admit defeat. |
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"Not to get all philosophical, but what is 'me'? I'm just a sum of my (inner and outer) parts. I guess I'm implicitly accepting the physicalist explanation of mind/consciousness.
Anyway, I don't mind at all. I'm happy if they like whatever they do about me. I'd be miserable if I wanted people to like *everything* about me. It'd also contradict something I think and have said before - the only person who can tolerate all of me is myself
Rare I come across anyone who considers 'the hard problem' even psychiatrists. What is your view on what consciousness is? A trick the brain plays on itself, when it reaches a certain level of complexity?
Your next paragraph made me smile. I think it is a challenge too, accepting oneself; not simply a choice.
I'll start off by saying this is how I view the world - it's a philosophical position I resonate with most and there's no right or wrong.
It's easier to say what it's not - I don't accept the soul/spiritual aspects from religion(s) and the psychoanalytic conscious/sub-conscious/un-conscious babble from Freud and Jung (it's pseudoscience imo). I prefer the naturalist/physicalist position - consciousness is just the name we've given to the electrical impulses in our brain that make us feel ourselves. And I don't think humans are unique in that - we're just like all other animals, and thus, by extension, they're conscious too. The brain doesn't need to play any tricks, even if we are in a simulation, accepting that we 'exist' is still perfectly valid. Consciousness is just a side effect of brain evolution is what my answer would be I guess.
I...erm.. didn't understand any of that. Where's Hansoffate?
Haha, I'm sorry Sally, I've become accustomed to reading (and I guess using) jargon.
The psychoanalytic part - you don't need to understand it - I don't think the people who made it up understood it either!
Physicalism is the view that the only things that exist are physical things.
As long as you and Hans understand! I will admit defeat. "
No, please don't! Help me get better at communicating - is there something that's still unclear? |
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"Not to get all philosophical, but what is 'me'? I'm just a sum of my (inner and outer) parts. I guess I'm implicitly accepting the physicalist explanation of mind/consciousness.
Anyway, I don't mind at all. I'm happy if they like whatever they do about me. I'd be miserable if I wanted people to like *everything* about me. It'd also contradict something I think and have said before - the only person who can tolerate all of me is myself
Rare I come across anyone who considers 'the hard problem' even psychiatrists. What is your view on what consciousness is? A trick the brain plays on itself, when it reaches a certain level of complexity?
Your next paragraph made me smile. I think it is a challenge too, accepting oneself; not simply a choice.
I'll start off by saying this is how I view the world - it's a philosophical position I resonate with most and there's no right or wrong.
It's easier to say what it's not - I don't accept the soul/spiritual aspects from religion(s) and the psychoanalytic conscious/sub-conscious/un-conscious babble from Freud and Jung (it's pseudoscience imo). I prefer the naturalist/physicalist position - consciousness is just the name we've given to the electrical impulses in our brain that make us feel ourselves. And I don't think humans are unique in that - we're just like all other animals, and thus, by extension, they're conscious too. The brain doesn't need to play any tricks, even if we are in a simulation, accepting that we 'exist' is still perfectly valid. Consciousness is just a side effect of brain evolution is what my answer would be I guess."
I appreciate you making that initial statement. Hopefully, it also resonates for you when I say: I am quite happy to accept there are multiple viable world views. 'Resonate' does suggest perhaps that your choice is based on both critical analysis and what you feel to be true - or perhaps: an acknowledgement of your own cognitive bias? I have a few questions, which are explorative rather than challenging. I am not sure it will be apreciate having an in depth discusion on the thread though, so perhaps if you wish to continue we could DM? One question would be: In your view, at what point would an organism become conscious?
I have no issue with defining consciousness a -side effct- rather than a trick. My thoughts around it being a trick are more to do with the cartesian duality that is still prevalent - even within Psychiatry- of the mind being something immaterial; separate from the brain. It is often cited as the reason why Mental health is considered to be something separate from physical health. I think if I recall it is also a Daniel Dennet quote. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not to get all philosophical, but what is 'me'? I'm just a sum of my (inner and outer) parts. I guess I'm implicitly accepting the physicalist explanation of mind/consciousness.
Anyway, I don't mind at all. I'm happy if they like whatever they do about me. I'd be miserable if I wanted people to like *everything* about me. It'd also contradict something I think and have said before - the only person who can tolerate all of me is myself
Rare I come across anyone who considers 'the hard problem' even psychiatrists. What is your view on what consciousness is? A trick the brain plays on itself, when it reaches a certain level of complexity?
Your next paragraph made me smile. I think it is a challenge too, accepting oneself; not simply a choice.
I'll start off by saying this is how I view the world - it's a philosophical position I resonate with most and there's no right or wrong.
It's easier to say what it's not - I don't accept the soul/spiritual aspects from religion(s) and the psychoanalytic conscious/sub-conscious/un-conscious babble from Freud and Jung (it's pseudoscience imo). I prefer the naturalist/physicalist position - consciousness is just the name we've given to the electrical impulses in our brain that make us feel ourselves. And I don't think humans are unique in that - we're just like all other animals, and thus, by extension, they're conscious too. The brain doesn't need to play any tricks, even if we are in a simulation, accepting that we 'exist' is still perfectly valid. Consciousness is just a side effect of brain evolution is what my answer would be I guess.
I...erm.. didn't understand any of that. Where's Hansoffate?
Haha, I'm sorry Sally, I've become accustomed to reading (and I guess using) jargon.
The psychoanalytic part - you don't need to understand it - I don't think the people who made it up understood it either!
Physicalism is the view that the only things that exist are physical things.
As long as you and Hans understand! I will admit defeat.
No, please don't! Help me get better at communicating - is there something that's still unclear?"
Don't worry about it on my account. Hans knows I don't always understand what he's talking about either. |
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"Not to get all philosophical, but what is 'me'? I'm just a sum of my (inner and outer) parts. I guess I'm implicitly accepting the physicalist explanation of mind/consciousness.
Anyway, I don't mind at all. I'm happy if they like whatever they do about me. I'd be miserable if I wanted people to like *everything* about me. It'd also contradict something I think and have said before - the only person who can tolerate all of me is myself
Rare I come across anyone who considers 'the hard problem' even psychiatrists. What is your view on what consciousness is? A trick the brain plays on itself, when it reaches a certain level of complexity?
Your next paragraph made me smile. I think it is a challenge too, accepting oneself; not simply a choice.
I'll start off by saying this is how I view the world - it's a philosophical position I resonate with most and there's no right or wrong.
It's easier to say what it's not - I don't accept the soul/spiritual aspects from religion(s) and the psychoanalytic conscious/sub-conscious/un-conscious babble from Freud and Jung (it's pseudoscience imo). I prefer the naturalist/physicalist position - consciousness is just the name we've given to the electrical impulses in our brain that make us feel ourselves. And I don't think humans are unique in that - we're just like all other animals, and thus, by extension, they're conscious too. The brain doesn't need to play any tricks, even if we are in a simulation, accepting that we 'exist' is still perfectly valid. Consciousness is just a side effect of brain evolution is what my answer would be I guess.
I...erm.. didn't understand any of that. Where's Hansoffate?
Haha, I'm sorry Sally, I've become accustomed to reading (and I guess using) jargon.
The psychoanalytic part - you don't need to understand it - I don't think the people who made it up understood it either!
Physicalism is the view that the only things that exist are physical things.
As long as you and Hans understand! I will admit defeat.
No, please don't! Help me get better at communicating - is there something that's still unclear?
Don't worry about it on my account. Hans knows I don't always understand what he's talking about either. "
Okay, you'll be spared of further SEP-speak in this thread then |
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"Not to get all philosophical, but what is 'me'? I'm just a sum of my (inner and outer) parts. I guess I'm implicitly accepting the physicalist explanation of mind/consciousness.
Anyway, I don't mind at all. I'm happy if they like whatever they do about me. I'd be miserable if I wanted people to like *everything* about me. It'd also contradict something I think and have said before - the only person who can tolerate all of me is myself
Rare I come across anyone who considers 'the hard problem' even psychiatrists. What is your view on what consciousness is? A trick the brain plays on itself, when it reaches a certain level of complexity?
Your next paragraph made me smile. I think it is a challenge too, accepting oneself; not simply a choice.
I'll start off by saying this is how I view the world - it's a philosophical position I resonate with most and there's no right or wrong.
It's easier to say what it's not - I don't accept the soul/spiritual aspects from religion(s) and the psychoanalytic conscious/sub-conscious/un-conscious babble from Freud and Jung (it's pseudoscience imo). I prefer the naturalist/physicalist position - consciousness is just the name we've given to the electrical impulses in our brain that make us feel ourselves. And I don't think humans are unique in that - we're just like all other animals, and thus, by extension, they're conscious too. The brain doesn't need to play any tricks, even if we are in a simulation, accepting that we 'exist' is still perfectly valid. Consciousness is just a side effect of brain evolution is what my answer would be I guess.
I...erm.. didn't understand any of that. Where's Hansoffate?
Haha, I'm sorry Sally, I've become accustomed to reading (and I guess using) jargon.
The psychoanalytic part - you don't need to understand it - I don't think the people who made it up understood it either!
Physicalism is the view that the only things that exist are physical things.
As long as you and Hans understand! I will admit defeat.
No, please don't! Help me get better at communicating - is there something that's still unclear?
Don't worry about it on my account. Hans knows I don't always understand what he's talking about either. "
Let's not pretend I always know what I am talking about. It is certainly not an opinion I hold about myself. I am just interested in weird shit. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Not to get all philosophical, but what is 'me'? I'm just a sum of my (inner and outer) parts. I guess I'm implicitly accepting the physicalist explanation of mind/consciousness.
Anyway, I don't mind at all. I'm happy if they like whatever they do about me. I'd be miserable if I wanted people to like *everything* about me. It'd also contradict something I think and have said before - the only person who can tolerate all of me is myself
Rare I come across anyone who considers 'the hard problem' even psychiatrists. What is your view on what consciousness is? A trick the brain plays on itself, when it reaches a certain level of complexity?
Your next paragraph made me smile. I think it is a challenge too, accepting oneself; not simply a choice.
I'll start off by saying this is how I view the world - it's a philosophical position I resonate with most and there's no right or wrong.
It's easier to say what it's not - I don't accept the soul/spiritual aspects from religion(s) and the psychoanalytic conscious/sub-conscious/un-conscious babble from Freud and Jung (it's pseudoscience imo). I prefer the naturalist/physicalist position - consciousness is just the name we've given to the electrical impulses in our brain that make us feel ourselves. And I don't think humans are unique in that - we're just like all other animals, and thus, by extension, they're conscious too. The brain doesn't need to play any tricks, even if we are in a simulation, accepting that we 'exist' is still perfectly valid. Consciousness is just a side effect of brain evolution is what my answer would be I guess.
I...erm.. didn't understand any of that. Where's Hansoffate?
Haha, I'm sorry Sally, I've become accustomed to reading (and I guess using) jargon.
The psychoanalytic part - you don't need to understand it - I don't think the people who made it up understood it either!
Physicalism is the view that the only things that exist are physical things.
As long as you and Hans understand! I will admit defeat.
No, please don't! Help me get better at communicating - is there something that's still unclear?
Don't worry about it on my account. Hans knows I don't always understand what he's talking about either.
Okay, you'll be spared of further SEP-speak in this thread then "
I need a lie down now... |
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I’m like marmite, some people love me and others hate me. I honestly don’t care either way what people think. If there’s only one or two attributes they do like about me it’s usually a fairly mutual feeling |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I’m like marmite, some people love me and others hate me. I honestly don’t care either way what people think. If there’s only one or two attributes they do like about me it’s usually a fairly mutual feeling "
That’s so rude |
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I used to let what people thought of me effect my self esteem
Now I don't care, worked on loving myself and those who like who I am and what I represent will show themselves over time
It's nice to be liked though! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
I sometimes question myself. I feel like maybe I’m being a bit sensitive and snowflakey. Obviously I snap out of it but I’m keen to hear other perspectives. Particularly of those that don’t really care what someone likes/ desires them for I guess.
I’m off work today so doing some thinking. "
Is this just a question about if people like you for sexual reasons or also for general reasons?
Such as if person A was spreading (possibly untrue) gossip about person B and person B wasn't aware and didn't know why people were being off with them. For example. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
I sometimes question myself. I feel like maybe I’m being a bit sensitive and snowflakey. Obviously I snap out of it but I’m keen to hear other perspectives. Particularly of those that don’t really care what someone likes/ desires them for I guess.
I’m off work today so doing some thinking.
Is this just a question about if people like you for sexual reasons or also for general reasons?
Such as if person A was spreading (possibly untrue) gossip about person B and person B wasn't aware and didn't know why people were being off with them. For example."
No hahaha. 
This is about if people like you because they find you overall genuinely attractive physically or mentally whatever. Or if they only like you because you’re an older woman or you’ve got a 9 inch black cock or if you are a ‘bbw’  etc. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
I sometimes question myself. I feel like maybe I’m being a bit sensitive and snowflakey. Obviously I snap out of it but I’m keen to hear other perspectives. Particularly of those that don’t really care what someone likes/ desires them for I guess.
I’m off work today so doing some thinking.
Is this just a question about if people like you for sexual reasons or also for general reasons?
Such as if person A was spreading (possibly untrue) gossip about person B and person B wasn't aware and didn't know why people were being off with them. For example.
No hahaha.
This is about if people like you because they find you overall genuinely attractive physically or mentally whatever. Or if they only like you because you’re an older woman or you’ve got a 9 inch black cock or if you are a ‘bbw’ etc. "
and also does it bother you is the question I think. Does it matter to you what someone likes you for |
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"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)? "
The phrase couldn’t give a rats arse applies to me darling. Because if they don’t then that’s all good by me. I’m still going to be me |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
The phrase couldn’t give a rats arse applies to me darling. Because if they don’t then that’s all good by me. I’m still going to be me "
I only like you because you’re a cougar.  |
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"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
The phrase couldn’t give a rats arse applies to me darling. Because if they don’t then that’s all good by me. I’m still going to be me
I only like you because you’re a cougar. "
Do you? That’s good by me. I’m a teeny tiny cougar  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
The phrase couldn’t give a rats arse applies to me darling. Because if they don’t then that’s all good by me. I’m still going to be me
I only like you because you’re a cougar.
Do you? That’s good by me. I’m a teeny tiny cougar "
I am not telling you what I like about you, that’s moist |
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"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
The phrase couldn’t give a rats arse applies to me darling. Because if they don’t then that’s all good by me. I’m still going to be me
I only like you because you’re a cougar.
Do you? That’s good by me. I’m a teeny tiny cougar
I am not telling you what I like about you, that’s moist "
Is it moist already? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
The phrase couldn’t give a rats arse applies to me darling. Because if they don’t then that’s all good by me. I’m still going to be me
I only like you because you’re a cougar.
Do you? That’s good by me. I’m a teeny tiny cougar
I am not telling you what I like about you, that’s moist
Is it moist already? "
I’ve been told not to answer that |
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"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
The phrase couldn’t give a rats arse applies to me darling. Because if they don’t then that’s all good by me. I’m still going to be me
I only like you because you’re a cougar.
Do you? That’s good by me. I’m a teeny tiny cougar
I am not telling you what I like about you, that’s moist
Is it moist already?
I’ve been told not to answer that "
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Do you want people to like you for you? Or do you mind if they seem to only or mainly like you for a specific feature (hair colour, penis size, body size/ shape, age etc)?
I sometimes question myself. I feel like maybe I’m being a bit sensitive and snowflakey. Obviously I snap out of it but I’m keen to hear other perspectives. Particularly of those that don’t really care what someone likes/ desires them for I guess.
I’m off work today so doing some thinking.
Is this just a question about if people like you for sexual reasons or also for general reasons?
Such as if person A was spreading (possibly untrue) gossip about person B and person B wasn't aware and didn't know why people were being off with them. For example.
No hahaha.
This is about if people like you because they find you overall genuinely attractive physically or mentally whatever. Or if they only like you because you’re an older woman or you’ve got a 9 inch black cock or if you are a ‘bbw’ etc. and also does it bother you is the question I think. Does it matter to you what someone likes you for"
Suppose it depends on if they reveal what box I'm ticking. |
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Yes I want people to like me just for being me.
If they only like me because I fit their age profile or they are attracted to my physical characteristics we aren't going to have very much in common and in situations like that, their reasons for liking me are irrelevant. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I want people to like me for me. I know I provide great entertainment though so it's unlikely people won't like me.
F
I like you. You’re nice"
She hasn't let you see the otherside of her |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I want people to like me for me. I know I provide great entertainment though so it's unlikely people won't like me.
F
I like you. You’re nice
She hasn't let you see the otherside of her "
The side you’ll be seeing tonight |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On here I assume that any attraction initially is going to be physical and therefore somewhat superficial. If it's someone I'm meeting more than once I like to think that I do more than tick a box for them. But for one offs that really doesn't bother me in the slightest as I'm probably doing the same. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"On here I assume that any attraction initially is going to be physical and therefore somewhat superficial. If it's someone I'm meeting more than once I like to think that I do more than tick a box for them. But for one offs that really doesn't bother me in the slightest as I'm probably doing the same. "
There’s definitely a physical attraction here. Yep. |
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