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Best bits of Bottom
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"That's what you get for haggling you see Eddie"
'Wot a kick in the bollocks!?'
"No, he just slipped and steadied himself by placing his boot between my testicles!"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just listening to Ade Edmondson on Desert Island Discs "
Not my humour but was reading an interesting interview with Ade about Rik and another about Ade's mh issues |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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""Come on Eddie, there must be more to life than juggs"
"Nope! A wazzo pair of juggs it is""
"So you're looking for somebody homely, with cooking skills, fun to be with... and a wazzle pair of jugs!" |
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Spudgun: Why do we have to wear dressing gowns anyway? We look stupid.
Richie : They're not dressing gowns, anus, they're cowls. What kind of devil worshippers are you?
Spudgun : Ones that don't like wearing dressing gowns.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Just listening to Ade Edmondson on Desert Island Discs
Not my humour but was reading an interesting interview with Ade about Rik and another about Ade's mh issues "
I'll also have a look for that too. Thank you. They're a niche comic duo, but love em'! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Mayall dressed as Kilroy-Silk:
"Should traffic wardens be armed?... In the studi...."
(Falls down the stairs)."
"Eddie, why do you never flush the toilet?!" |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Spudgun: Why do we have to wear dressing gowns anyway? We look stupid.
Richie : They're not dressing gowns, anus, they're cowls. What kind of devil worshippers are you?
Spudgun : Ones that don't like wearing dressing gowns.
"
"Eddie, give me the cattleprod, GIVE IT TO ME!!"
'Ok'
Fzzzzzzttttttt ...... Spluuuuurrtzzzzzz |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mayall dressed as Kilroy-Silk:
"Should traffic wardens be armed?... In the studi...."
(Falls down the stairs).
"Eddie, why do you never flush the toilet?!" "
Lol!!  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"How DARE you accuse me of masturbating!?"
"I was just saying it's incredible it opens on that exact page!"
'Yes and the reason you said that is because you know that's always the page I look at when I'm having a Wan.... Get outa my house!' |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Do your balls hang low?
Can you swing 'em to and fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot?
Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Do you get a funny feeling when they're hanging from the ceiling?
Oh you'll never be a sailor if your balls hang low! |
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"Spudgun: Why do we have to wear dressing gowns anyway? We look stupid.
Richie : They're not dressing gowns, anus, they're cowls. What kind of devil worshippers are you?
Spudgun : Ones that don't like wearing dressing gowns.
"Eddie, give me the cattleprod, GIVE IT TO ME!!"
'Ok'
Fzzzzzzttttttt ...... Spluuuuurrtzzzzzz "
 ahh canne wait to watch it on Halloween |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Do your balls hang low?
Can you swing 'em to and fro?
Can you tie 'em in a knot?
Can you tie 'em in a bow?
Do you get a funny feeling when they're hanging from the ceiling?
Oh you'll never be a sailor if your balls hang low!"
Thread closer sir.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't like sprouts!
Nobody likes sprouts!
Why do we have them then?
Because it's Christmas!"
No watching telly until the Queens speech!... Well, unless there's a bond film on obviously. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"... I think it's time to go to the toilet. Eddie, wouldn't you like to come to the toilet with me?"
"Have you got a REAL woman in there?"
"WHAT? You think I'm some kind of sexual inadequate? I have a very full and rich and varied sex life, thank you very much!" |
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Richie Pushes Eddie in to the sex shop. Eddie acts nervous.
Shop Assistant: Can I help you, sir?
Eddie: This is a sex shop, isn't it?
Shop Assistant: Yes.
Eddie: (slaps money down) I'll have five quids worth then!
Shop Assistant: Very droll, sir, I haven’t heard that one before.
Eddie: Haven't you? Shall I tell it again?
Shop Assistant: No thank you sir, I'd rather have a pineapple inserted violently into my rectum.
Eddie: You've been working here too long mate. |
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I will.