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Too hot! (hot damn!)
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By *ruceyy OP Man
over a year ago
London |
Hi fab. I've been chatting to someone. (Oooooh)
The topic came up of being insecure even if someone wants to meet someone. So have you ever had it where someone wants to meet you but you are skeptical because you think THEY are too hot for you?
Genuinely interested in this one. So reply. Even you that pretends to hate me! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Omg yes, all the time.
Probably because I have no confidence in myself and am very self conscious, so it’s always a thought in the back of my mind that I’m not good enough and why is this person interested in me when they’re way out of my league. |
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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago
Derry |
First I hope your chat is fruitful.
And to your question no but I've had the reverse. But it wasn't they thought that I was hot, but why would I want to see them. They were either looking for an ego boost or their self esteem was in their boots. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes.
I’ve ended conversations with people because I think they are too hot and would be disappointed in me. Or if I’ve looked at their veris and seen how hot all their previous meets were I back out then too.
I’m trying very hard not to do it with someone I’m talking to now. |
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I remember once last year being genuinely surprised that someone so absurdly attractive wanted a date with my weird gothy arse. But I did it anyway and it was fabulous. And I'm in a much less self deprecating place these days  |
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Yes, absolutely, all the time. Every time, in fact.
I think this goes with the territory for me though. If I want to meet someone it’s because I think they’re fucking amazing. So hell yeah I feel like an awkward ugly duckling in comparison. |
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By *mber81Woman
over a year ago
Lives in Preston, Eng |
"Hi fab. I've been chatting to someone. (Oooooh)
The topic came up of being insecure even if someone wants to meet someone. So have you ever had it where someone wants to meet you but you are skeptical because you think THEY are too hot for you?
Genuinely interested in this one. So reply. Even you that pretends to hate me!"
I have definitely had plenty of thoughts where I have said to myself that I am surprised they are interested because they must have so many hotter people interested in them. But I don't let that worry me. My attraction is not purely physical so I assume that is the same for others too.
Maybe it is my sparkling conversation that is luring them in.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's normal but it's on me not them. I'm sure we all have our insecurities that flow over into the lifestyle. Plenty of times I've felt skeptical over the beautiful people but maybe they just think you are beautiful too. |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Travelling |
"No"
I shall expand... Briefly
They are talking to me, they are somewhat interested. They seem to want to meet.
We meet, they become disappointed (or me in them). We leave it at that, what changed? Things happened but nothing changed, it's no different than if we had gone separate ways because of worries without meeting. Instead of a what if, it's now a oh well, but the end result is the same pretty much.
People are strange. We are attracted to strange and weird shit, that includes people. Often we can't explain why we just do.
I find it strange when people are attracted to me, interested in me, like me, interact with me. But they do it, so no point worrying about the why. They are just as weird as me in that case, and I like it.
Granted when it comes to this it's generally easier for men than women to be accept interest towards them due to it being more likely a man will want the sex more than the person (say it with me now: not all men!)
If somebody likes you, don't stress. They will be weird but that's okay. Just take it as a compliment and see where it leads.
See, told you brief. |
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By *adMerWoman
over a year ago
Sandwich |
I have definitely had the feeling that with some “hotter” looking guys, and some couples, that they’re only putting in enough effort to meet because I am a back up plan.
This is not all hot people and obviously to some I am hotter than I believe myself to be. Each person should deserve to be treated on their own merits. It’s definitely the way I prefer to live  |
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I have been genuinely surprised to have been approached by people who I have put on a pedestal. I have been guilty of thinking you’re too hot for me in the past.
But I’m more pragmatic now, because I find people hot for lots of different (sometimes) odd reasons. So it theoretically stands to reason that others feel the same way. So there’s no real reason I can’t tick a box for someone. We’re all hot in our own way, to some people.
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"I remember once last year being genuinely surprised that someone so absurdly attractive wanted a date with my weird gothy arse. But I did it anyway and it was fabulous. And I'm in a much less self deprecating place these days "
Glad to hear this, be confident your weird Gothy arse is sexy as hell |
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"Hi fab. I've been chatting to someone. (Oooooh)
The topic came up of being insecure even if someone wants to meet someone. So have you ever had it where someone wants to meet you but you are skeptical because you think THEY are too hot for you?
Genuinely interested in this one. So reply. Even you that pretends to hate me!"
Yes although for me it’s not making contact at all on the basis they’re too hot for me and would laugh in my face. I wish I’d bottled the fearlessness and confidence I had in my 20s lol |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
It's not that they're too hot. It's more.... I don't think I'm anything particularly special. I don't have that sort of sexual energy/charisma.
But sometimes you say fuck it don't you? That's what I'm saying today - on my way to spend time with someone who I thought wouldn't be interested in me and we've been talking for a couple of years now.
So maybe I'll always think I'm not hot enough. I can keep saying fuck it and just going for it. |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Travelling |
"Y’know, Fab has helped change this sort of insecurity for me.
There are people out there who fancy me. And they’re fucking hot! So maybe I’m not all that bad myself after all."
Exactly it! Though I still stand behind they are weird more than I am not all that bad. |
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"Omg yes, all the time.
Probably because I have no confidence in myself and am very self conscious, so it’s always a thought in the back of my mind that I’m not good enough and why is this person interested in me when they’re way out of my league. "
Yep, exactly this for me.  |
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No, not that someone is too hot necessarily, but I definitely worry about being a disappointment. Not sure if that's quite the same thing!
I am, though, more likely to be sceptical about things like age, or if I can see that everyone else they've met is very different to me. |
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It isn't so much about their 'hotness' or perhaps even being out of their league; it's being fearful that I won't live up to their expectations when we meet. I sometimes think the other person can do 'better'. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't say insecure, but always very nervous when we meet someone for the first time after having chatted and exchanged pictures.
Why? People behave differently in person. By this point I've obviously sent our pictures and they've sent theirs.
There are so many boxes to tick for a meet to go as planned - I can look attractive in pictures, but do I tick the boxes in terms of mannerisms, laugh, energy, they way I look at them and vice versa?
Our conversation, our cumulative personas need to mesh... we've got to click with them and sometimes it's easy to say no from a single picture, but In our experience it's when we meet that we know if it's a yes or a no.
Summary: Yes, there is insecurity in terms of nervousness, but you don't know until you meet them!
xx Jess
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By *Booboo-Man
over a year ago
Edinburgh |
"Hi fab. I've been chatting to someone. (Oooooh)
The topic came up of being insecure even if someone wants to meet someone. So have you ever had it where someone wants to meet you but you are skeptical because you think THEY are too hot for you?
Genuinely interested in this one. So reply. Even you that pretends to hate me!"
It's not necessary about being insecure, it's about being realistic sometimes.
On other apps I often swipe left on the absolute hotties because 1:I'm not going to get anywhere as they're out of my league and 2:I'm not going to add to their 9000 people who have liked them.
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By *Booboo-Man
over a year ago
Edinburgh |
"It isn't so much about their 'hotness' or perhaps even being out of their league; it's being fearful that I won't live up to their expectations when we meet. I sometimes think the other person can do 'better'."
A little bit of this too. Someone who has been on 1000 meets and has all the confidence is not going to be satisfied with me as tbh I'm fairly vanilla in this place. |
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I've not been worried that anyone might be too hot for me, I mean, just look at me 
But I do seriously wonder why anyone would fancy me at times. I think we all have our internal worries, however confident we might seem |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Travelling |
"I've not been worried that anyone might be too hot for me, I mean, just look at me
But I do seriously wonder why anyone would fancy me at times. I think we all have our internal worries, however confident we might seem "
People are weird. That's how I see it. We just like what we like.
I don't have a type or any of that shit. I often find I end up attracted to different people for different reasons, some can be common traits and others no connection and complete opposites. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes. And in my experience the "hot" guy is interested in me sexually but not as a person. And I've slowly realised that isn't good enough. (By no means am I suggesting all hot guys are just wanting to use women!). |
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I feel all fuzzy inside 
