FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Being around people that you don’t like/ don’t like you
Being around people that you don’t like/ don’t like you
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Can't always avoid it. You are not going to be everyone's cup of tea. I currently am trying to avoid but I am the one missing out as I don't get to see my friends as much by not going to events. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Can't always avoid it. You are not going to be everyone's cup of tea. I currently am trying to avoid but I am the one missing out as I don't get to see my friends as much by not going to events. "
Even with colleagues I don’t like I avoid. Work from home to avoid them where I can |
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In my daily life I just avoid as much as possible.
At work it's difficult, have to deal with someone who is an absolute idiot of epic proportions. I have meetings with him with witnesses present, he's not pleasant.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can't always avoid it. You are not going to be everyone's cup of tea. I currently am trying to avoid but I am the one missing out as I don't get to see my friends as much by not going to events. "
I must disagree because if your friends are friends they’ll call on you, invite you and still be around although you avoid the one, or more, people  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In my daily life I just avoid as much as possible.
At work it's difficult, have to deal with someone who is an absolute idiot of epic proportions. I have meetings with him with witnesses present, he's not pleasant. "
Won't HR do anything about him? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can't always avoid it. You are not going to be everyone's cup of tea. I currently am trying to avoid but I am the one missing out as I don't get to see my friends as much by not going to events.
I must disagree because if your friends are friends they’ll call on you, invite you and still be around although you avoid the one, or more, people "
There are friends I can see in smaller groups or smaller socials. But I don't get to see those who live hours away but used to travel here for big events |
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By *mrmarkMan
over a year ago
tavistock |
Worked for 3 years with a crew that didnt want me there. Loved going into work knowing that it pissed them off more than the petty little things they did to wind me up. Nothing worked. Left the watch manager a note when I left saying that I was going to take the lot of them for harrassment bullying and racist abuse. They shat themselves. |
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"In my daily life I just avoid as much as possible.
At work it's difficult, have to deal with someone who is an absolute idiot of epic proportions. I have meetings with him with witnesses present, he's not pleasant.
Won't HR do anything about him?"
Nope, he's too valuable an asset  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Can't always avoid it. You are not going to be everyone's cup of tea. I currently am trying to avoid but I am the one missing out as I don't get to see my friends as much by not going to events.
I must disagree because if your friends are friends they’ll call on you, invite you and still be around although you avoid the one, or more, people
There are friends I can see in smaller groups or smaller socials. But I don't get to see those who live hours away but used to travel here for big events "
I see
I feel, definitely in my life, social circles decrease in time because of all sorts of factors so it’s better to just appreciate those who mean most to you  |
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By *essaMayWoman
over a year ago
Fairytale Wood |
A lot of time round it. I accept there are people that don't like me nor do i really try to be liked.
Try to deal in a professional manner towards them. Try and avoid situations that may give an opportunity of conflict.
Thats as much you can do.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In my daily life I just avoid as much as possible.
At work it's difficult, have to deal with someone who is an absolute idiot of epic proportions. I have meetings with him with witnesses present, he's not pleasant.
Won't HR do anything about him?
Nope, he's too valuable an asset "
We have one of those too.
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"In my daily life I just avoid as much as possible.
At work it's difficult, have to deal with someone who is an absolute idiot of epic proportions. I have meetings with him with witnesses present, he's not pleasant.
Won't HR do anything about him?
Nope, he's too valuable an asset
We have one of those too.
"
It absolutely sucks doesn't it? Causes so much stress |
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"In my daily life I just avoid as much as possible.
At work it's difficult, have to deal with someone who is an absolute idiot of epic proportions. I have meetings with him with witnesses present, he's not pleasant.
Won't HR do anything about him?
Nope, he's too valuable an asset
We have one of those too.
"
We three |
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"Do you avoid it? Do you mind it? What are the vibes?
"
Some avoid conflict.
I actively hunt it down.
I'm not aggressive.
But I am aggressively polite.
I'll talk to them, engage with them and be amenable and sociable.
Then we'll say goodbye and part as we met. On terms of my choosing. Because if I avoid them, they have already set terms and impacted me negatively. So I don't allow that. I will control the narrative and decide how I feel on my terms.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I only interact with people that I like and like us back, I hate games and I try to be true to myself and others.
At work, I do have people that don't like me and I don't like them back. I've just kept a straight head, fairness, being civil and respecting a colleague that I do not share personal information and niceties with.
I can be very matter of fact, so I'm used to people not liking me.
Jess xx |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
I don't know anyone who doesn't like me,except maybe one of my brother in laws who I haven't seen in years.
I wouldn't avoid family affairs just because he was there.
I can't think of anyone I don't like who I'd want to avoid.
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As a trans Wigan there are a good few people that are very uncomfortable around me and I find the fear / panic on their wretched faces fabulous when I am around , even better when I sit next to them or stand next to them in the group  |
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"Trans women not Wigan ffs
Wigan ain't all it's cracked up to be
Tbh the last time I was in Wigan I got lost driving and ended up there. I thought I was in the bad lands "
You WERE in the bad lands  Also it has a ridiculous one way system  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Play the player for your own gain and benefit to have the control allowing them to think they have the control … letting them think that I do not know what they are really about and where there coming from |
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By *apnDomMan
over a year ago
London |
Of course it sucks, but it rarely ever happens to me, and if it does happen, I do mind in the moment but move on very quickly and find other people to spend my time with.
If they don't like me, I won't be seeing them again.
Why? Do you hang out with people that don't like you? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't really have to do that any more except at rare family occasions.
I try to avoid people I don't like and hope that people who don't like me try to avoid me. "
I always avoid usually because a) it makes me uncomfortable and b) it’s better for all of we aren’t in one another’s presence |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Of course it sucks, but it rarely ever happens to me, and if it does happen, I do mind in the moment but move on very quickly and find other people to spend my time with.
If they don't like me, I won't be seeing them again.
Why? Do you hang out with people that don't like you?"
No but I think that sometimes on fab it’s inevitable in some situations. And I’m work it is too. |
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By *assy69Man
over a year ago
West Sussex and Wales |
"Do you avoid it? Do you mind it? What are the vibes?
"
It really depends on how I feel at any given time…… most of the time I can rise above it and be civil….., sometimes in need to avoid them like the plague, other times it amuses me to provoke and agitate them just by being around them |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't like most. So I avoid the.
Those I do like are on varied levels. The more I like you, the more annoying I'm likely to be. "
Oh yeah annoying someone you like is ok. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Do you avoid it? Do you mind it? What are the vibes?
Avoid when possible.
Tolerate when unavoidable.
I can only think of one person who I'd leave a room if they walked in.
A"
It’s possible to avoid. I’m leaning towards that. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
Sometimes it's unavoidable. I'd much rather give them space to enjoy their time without me causing them drama or stress and I'd like to think the same treatment would be afforded to me.
If there's ongoing drama, I'd sometimes avoid it. Otherwise, just acknowledge and not try and bring bad energy to them. I can't think of anyone in my life who deserves that, not when most people are just trying to enjoy life. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Sometimes it's unavoidable. I'd much rather give them space to enjoy their time without me causing them drama or stress and I'd like to think the same treatment would be afforded to me.
If there's ongoing drama, I'd sometimes avoid it. Otherwise, just acknowledge and not try and bring bad energy to them. I can't think of anyone in my life who deserves that, not when most people are just trying to enjoy life. "
I actually think I avoid people sometimes not just for my own peace but for their too. If I’m anxious about seeing them, they could be too and that’s just long. Not good vibes at all |
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"Do you avoid it? Do you mind it? What are the vibes?
"
I meditate daily. There’s a beautiful one that talks you through being the ocean, then flying high above like an eagle. Watching your life from above means the waves of annoyances become mere ripples. That is how I now react to such people- ripples that aren’t worthy of a response. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Do you avoid it? Do you mind it? What are the vibes?
I meditate daily. There’s a beautiful one that talks you through being the ocean, then flying high above like an eagle. Watching your life from above means the waves of annoyances become mere ripples. That is how I now react to such people- ripples that aren’t worthy of a response. "
If it’s on YouTube could you post a link? |
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I'm always polite regardless. No need to cause a scene, or atmosphere to drag other people Into my dislike/their dislike.
Not letting them rent space in my head is easiest for me. I do find it hard to recognise whether someone is shy, or avoiding me though and would prefer to be plain old told. Just like your do you like me thread |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm always polite regardless. No need to cause a scene, or atmosphere to drag other people Into my dislike/their dislike.
Not letting them rent space in my head is easiest for me. I do find it hard to recognise whether someone is shy, or avoiding me though and would prefer to be plain old told. Just like your do you like me thread "
You’re so wise!
And actually that thread was really good for me because I have a clear idea of who doesn’t like me and whose company I should avoid. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'd never waste my precious time to be around someone I don't like. If it was a passive meet like I was with someone who brought someone else I happened to not like then I'd just be civil like everyone should be. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"Sometimes it's unavoidable. I'd much rather give them space to enjoy their time without me causing them drama or stress and I'd like to think the same treatment would be afforded to me.
If there's ongoing drama, I'd sometimes avoid it. Otherwise, just acknowledge and not try and bring bad energy to them. I can't think of anyone in my life who deserves that, not when most people are just trying to enjoy life.
I actually think I avoid people sometimes not just for my own peace but for their too. If I’m anxious about seeing them, they could be too and that’s just long. Not good vibes at all"
No it's not. At all. And yes, it's not so much about my peace as it is also theirs. I don't want to not enjoy things, I don't want other people to not enjoy things.
If I'm feeling really anxious at the thought of seeing someone, it's not a good sign. So I either make sure mentally I'm in a strong enough place that I can negate any bad energy or I bow out to avoid adding fuel to the fire. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Sometimes it's unavoidable. I'd much rather give them space to enjoy their time without me causing them drama or stress and I'd like to think the same treatment would be afforded to me.
If there's ongoing drama, I'd sometimes avoid it. Otherwise, just acknowledge and not try and bring bad energy to them. I can't think of anyone in my life who deserves that, not when most people are just trying to enjoy life.
I actually think I avoid people sometimes not just for my own peace but for their too. If I’m anxious about seeing them, they could be too and that’s just long. Not good vibes at all
No it's not. At all. And yes, it's not so much about my peace as it is also theirs. I don't want to not enjoy things, I don't want other people to not enjoy things.
If I'm feeling really anxious at the thought of seeing someone, it's not a good sign. So I either make sure mentally I'm in a strong enough place that I can negate any bad energy or I bow out to avoid adding fuel to the fire."
Another wise one |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Do you avoid it? Do you mind it? What are the vibes?
I meditate daily. There’s a beautiful one that talks you through being the ocean, then flying high above like an eagle. Watching your life from above means the waves of annoyances become mere ripples. That is how I now react to such people- ripples that aren’t worthy of a response. "
I guess that’s slightly better but it still feels very rooted in a fixed minded that things are how they are and you can’t change them , but just re-condition your response to them. Which is still 100% reactive-responsive , just like a medicated version of most people |
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"I don’t actively seek them out, but i come across someone, it makes my day, I go out of my way to be overly polite and nice to them.
Sometimes you can hear the piss boiling inside.
The mr
"
^^ this  |
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I’ve started to avoid it. I only really do things I want to do now rather than forcing myself to do stuff just cos my mates do as well. Like golf for example. I hate golf but I used to play just cos my mates did and I felt left out if I didn’t join in.
Now I just let them enjoy it without me and we do stuff together that we all like on another day etc |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve started to avoid it. I only really do things I want to do now rather than forcing myself to do stuff just cos my mates do as well. Like golf for example. I hate golf but I used to play just cos my mates did and I felt left out if I didn’t join in.
Now I just let them enjoy it without me and we do stuff together that we all like on another day etc "
And I bet you feel so much happier now. Authenticity really is the key |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Love being around people who don’t like me. I always greet them and smile in their face to show who the adult is. Was taught to always be kind to people. "
Some would say showing their dislike IS adult.
Don’t you find it a tad draining and a waste of energy focusing on them enough to show you’re more ‘adult’ than they are? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can be civilised with those I don't necessarily gel with.
Or I can co exist as if they don't exist quite comfortably too.
Or I can have a laugh with them when we both know the feelings mutual and get out digs in at each other in the process if that's the dynamic.
I had one person outright tell me they didn't like me and I had to be around them a lot. I told him I didn't like him either. Small conversation as to why and we got on just fine after that. Sometimes helps to make your feelings known. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don’t actively seek them out, but i come across someone, it makes my day, I go out of my way to be overly polite and nice to them.
Sometimes you can hear the piss boiling inside.
The mr
^^ this "
I just wouldn’t respond to you |
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"I don’t actively seek them out, but i come across someone, it makes my day, I go out of my way to be overly polite and nice to them.
Sometimes you can hear the piss boiling inside.
The mr
^^ this
I just wouldn’t respond to you "
Not everything is about you Steve, difficult concept to understand  but you’ll figure it out with time. Much love  |
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"I don’t actively seek them out, but i come across someone, it makes my day, I go out of my way to be overly polite and nice to them.
Sometimes you can hear the piss boiling inside.
The mr
^^ this
I just wouldn’t respond to you
Not everything is about you Steve, difficult concept to understand but you’ll figure it out with time. Much love "
So much sexual tension, get a room fellas.... |
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I just whack on the customer service face and wait for an opportunity to leave without appearing rude.
If I don't want to be around someone at all, I'll skip that and just leave.
I don't thrive on it, I don't mind it too much, but I'd rather spend time with people that bring me joy |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don’t actively seek them out, but i come across someone, it makes my day, I go out of my way to be overly polite and nice to them.
Sometimes you can hear the piss boiling inside.
The mr
^^ this
I just wouldn’t respond to you
Not everything is about you Steve, difficult concept to understand but you’ll figure it out with time. Much love "
Oh I knew that wasn’t about me. Just wanted to let you know
My narcissism has some bounds x |
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"I don’t actively seek them out, but i come across someone, it makes my day, I go out of my way to be overly polite and nice to them.
Sometimes you can hear the piss boiling inside.
The mr
^^ this
I just wouldn’t respond to you
Not everything is about you Steve, difficult concept to understand but you’ll figure it out with time. Much love
Oh I knew that wasn’t about me. Just wanted to let you know
My narcissism has some bounds x"
We’ll see |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don’t actively seek them out, but i come across someone, it makes my day, I go out of my way to be overly polite and nice to them.
Sometimes you can hear the piss boiling inside.
The mr
^^ this
I just wouldn’t respond to you
Not everything is about you Steve, difficult concept to understand but you’ll figure it out with time. Much love
So much sexual tension, get a room fellas.... "
Wait until we meet in Manchester (aubergine emoji) |
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"I don’t actively seek them out, but i come across someone, it makes my day, I go out of my way to be overly polite and nice to them.
Sometimes you can hear the piss boiling inside.
The mr
^^ this
I just wouldn’t respond to you
Not everything is about you Steve, difficult concept to understand but you’ll figure it out with time. Much love
So much sexual tension, get a room fellas....
Wait until we meet in Manchester (aubergine emoji) "
Handbags at MLS
|
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"I don’t actively seek them out, but i come across someone, it makes my day, I go out of my way to be overly polite and nice to them.
Sometimes you can hear the piss boiling inside.
The mr
^^ this
I just wouldn’t respond to you
Not everything is about you Steve, difficult concept to understand but you’ll figure it out with time. Much love
So much sexual tension, get a room fellas....
Wait until we meet in Manchester (aubergine emoji)
Handbags at MLS
"
Can’t wait |
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"I don’t actively seek them out, but i come across someone, it makes my day, I go out of my way to be overly polite and nice to them.
Sometimes you can hear the piss boiling inside.
The mr
"
I can’t find enough for this one |
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"I don’t actively seek them out, but i come across someone, it makes my day, I go out of my way to be overly polite and nice to them.
Sometimes you can hear the piss boiling inside.
The mr
^^ this
I just wouldn’t respond to you
Not everything is about you Steve, difficult concept to understand but you’ll figure it out with time. Much love
So much sexual tension, get a room fellas....
Wait until we meet in Manchester (aubergine emoji)
Handbags at MLS
Can’t wait "
Play nicely Rexie |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t actively seek them out, but i come across someone, it makes my day, I go out of my way to be overly polite and nice to them.
Sometimes you can hear the piss boiling inside.
The mr
^^ this
I just wouldn’t respond to you
Not everything is about you Steve, difficult concept to understand but you’ll figure it out with time. Much love
So much sexual tension, get a room fellas....
Wait until we meet in Manchester (aubergine emoji)
Handbags at MLS
Can’t wait "
Hopefully you will have a beer together and be friends. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don’t actively seek them out, but i come across someone, it makes my day, I go out of my way to be overly polite and nice to them.
Sometimes you can hear the piss boiling inside.
The mr
^^ this
I just wouldn’t respond to you
Not everything is about you Steve, difficult concept to understand but you’ll figure it out with time. Much love
So much sexual tension, get a room fellas....
Wait until we meet in Manchester (aubergine emoji)
Handbags at MLS
Can’t wait
Hopefully you will have a beer together and be friends. "
Bagsy not buying. |
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