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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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From another thread, this question got me curious, what is swinging?
Is it primarily about sex or is it about the people and chemistry first?
Before joining this site my thoughts were : it's couple swapping, but there are loads of different dynamics...hot wives, stag and vixen, threesomes, singles, fwbs, poly.
Seems to be like it's more than just sex, but sex is the reason? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I couldn’t tell you as sins I am single I technically don’t meet the requirements to be a swinger
I suppose you could say it’s wife swapping/ shareing with orther couples at it’s true hart |
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For me swinging is the difference between mutual enjoyment and community vs logging in when horny to scratch a purely selfish itch and expecting others to provide a service as if selecting off a menu in a restaurant.
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Travelling |
Yet another sequel to "what is love" 
It's going to be different things for different people, for different reasons.
Very few things like this have a definitive meaning, it's an umbrella term that covers a lot of areas for a lot of people.
One person's swinging may not be another's. |
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I guess I'd say it was sharing your partner with others or indulging in group sex, people will go about both differently, some want a connection others don't, some want poly relationships others don't I think everyone has their own ways they like to conduct their activities.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"From another thread, this question got me curious, what is swinging?
Is it primarily about sex or is it about the people and chemistry first?
Before joining this site my thoughts were : it's couple swapping, but there are loads of different dynamics...hot wives, stag and vixen, threesomes, singles, fwbs, poly.
Seems to be like it's more than just sex, but sex is the reason? "
- it’s definitely evolved over last few years ( as with most things) from just couple swapping, so imo has become all of that with sex remaining the common theme |
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When I first joined, it was just about casual sex, I didn't have to make friends with them, just fancy them and then hook up. I didn't change my outlook, until I met my fwb and everything changed, as I found someone I wanted to keep in my life. Then my journey changed and has evolved over the 4 years to what it is now  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When I first joined, it was just about casual sex, I didn't have to make friends with them, just fancy them and then hook up. I didn't change my outlook, until I met my fwb and everything changed, as I found someone I wanted to keep in my life. Then my journey changed and has evolved over the 4 years to what it is now "
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
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Poly isn't swinging.
I think some people who say they're poly are swingers but more comfortable with the term poly.
I think it's a very subjective term - no clear definition really.
The terms mentioned in the OP? They all fit under the ethical non-monogamy umbrella. Even that isn't quite accurate because there are people who aren't ethically non-monogamous (those meeting others without their partner's knowledge) and yet still would say they're swingers. So, it's complex and nuanced. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For me it’s more about the social side of things, getting dressed up and making an effort to impress, the thrill of meeting new people and the anticipation of things to come |
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By *oxesMan
over a year ago
Southend, Essex |
"From another thread, this question got me curious, what is swinging?
Is it primarily about sex or is it about the people and chemistry first?
Before joining this site my thoughts were : it's couple swapping, but there are loads of different dynamics...hot wives, stag and vixen, threesomes, singles, fwbs, poly.
Seems to be like it's more than just sex, but sex is the reason? "
The dictionary definition is the "practice of engaging in group sex or the swapping of sexual partners within a group, especially on a habitual basis."
This is an old and a problematic definition as (you can see from me) that many of today's swingers are singles. Engaging in activates that may not be wife swapping.
So a more modern definition maybe
"the act or practice of being free and uninhibited sexually". Which is a pretty damn vauge definition. There are many people who are engaging in sexual activities like hookups and even traditional swinging activates who do not perceive themselvesas swingers.
What separates these individuals is that with being a swingers they're is a shared identity.
So In a long winded answer I don't know. |
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By *heelerMan
over a year ago
Northants |
"I guess I'd say it was sharing your partner with others or indulging in group sex, people will go about both differently, some want a connection others don't, some want poly relationships others don't I think everyone has their own ways they like to conduct their activities.
Mrs"
Well described |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Casual sex with hot guys that don't need to know every detail of my life and don't care that I'm having more casual sex with more hot guys. "
I'm just currently missing the sex part.
And the hot guys. |
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Swinging has developed it seems from couples putting keys in a bowl to a free for all, where singles as young as 18 can develop their new found love of sex and old uns to, although its not so readily available the older you get and the more unattractive you get most don't get to go to the clubs because of the expense of it so don't see the social side of it, thats mostly for the beautiful people who stick together in groups  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Poly isn't swinging.
I think some people who say they're poly are swingers but more comfortable with the term poly.
I think it's a very subjective term - no clear definition really.
The terms mentioned in the OP? They all fit under the ethical non-monogamy umbrella. Even that isn't quite accurate because there are people who aren't ethically non-monogamous (those meeting others without their partner's knowledge) and yet still would say they're swingers. So, it's complex and nuanced."
Why does poly not equal swinging? Please excuse my naivety.
Is it because poly is being in more than one life partnership? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yet another sequel to "what is love"
It's going to be different things for different people, for different reasons.
Very few things like this have a definitive meaning, it's an umbrella term that covers a lot of areas for a lot of people.
One person's swinging may not be another's. "
Maybe I didn't pose the question in the best way.
I'm interested to know what it means to other people, or is there a general understanding of something. |
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"It's whatever you want it to be.
"
So if that is true. Why is it that people get balled out for calling it sex and not swinging? To me ut just seems like a fight looking for somewhere to kick off.
Those who object to calling it sex and not swinging only ever refer to the difference as being subtle but can never explain what it actually is.... |
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For me it is about sex with more than one person - either in a group/party or with a couple. It is about friendship and getting to know like minded people.
The sex part is fairly fundamental and whilst I respect those who are here for the social aspect only I think they have missed the point. It is the difference between playing on the pitch and being a spectator. |
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"It's whatever you want it to be.
So if that is true. Why is it that people get balled out for calling it sex and not swinging? To me ut just seems like a fight looking for somewhere to kick off.
Those who object to calling it sex and not swinging only ever refer to the difference as being subtle but can never explain what it actually is.... "
I suspect that it's that human trait of feeling slightly threatened if people want to do things differently to how certain individuals want to do them. |
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I also think that society's attitude to sex outside a monogamous relationship or sex with multiple partners is still that it's wrong and people feel better if they can claim that what they're doing involves something deeper that purely physical enjoyment of other people's bodies.
Of course many of us like to get to know someone before we have sex with them but some people don't. The end result hopefully is the same. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
The sex part is fairly fundamental and whilst I respect those who are here for the social aspect , It is the difference between playing on the pitch and being a spectator."
This  |
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"For me it is about sex with more than one person - either in a group/party or with a couple. It is about friendship and getting to know like minded people.
The sex part is fairly fundamental and whilst I respect those who are here for the social aspect only I think they have missed the point. It is the difference between playing on the pitch and being a spectator."
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"For me it’s more about the social side of things, getting dressed up and making an effort to impress, the thrill of meeting new people and the anticipation of things to come"
Isnt that just dating? |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"For me swinging is the difference between mutual enjoyment and community vs logging in when horny to scratch a purely selfish itch and expecting others to provide a service as if selecting off a menu in a restaurant.
"
Nail. Head.
It's never been just about couples. That's wife swapping.
Singles can be swingers. Despite some thinking otherwise......
A |
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but it’s what individuals perceive it 
each to their own 