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Who should initiate sex in a relationship?

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By *hagTonight OP   Man  over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

I was listening to something interesting about it and that was of who should initiate sex in a relationship.

They talked about many combinations of it, like, who it should be and if one does it, how many times should they ask their partner for it, also like, what if the other person never asks for sexy time, or not ask so often for it, what about if one want sex often, but the other one doesnt feel having it.

So many question surrounding it.

In my opinion, both should be able to initiate sex, many times people dont think of this, but rather place the blame on each other if they cant work it out.

Maiby one have a special sign they do if they want sex, like kissing their partner on the neck or a gently smack on the bum.

I am single, but it kind of goes the same way if you meet casually. I love to initiate, just by kissing and bringing it to a higher level.

What about you, who is the initiator in your relationship?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Sex is problematic when it becomes routine…

It’s Sunday so we must…

Or even not trying new things.

I don’t want to sue people get lazy but sometimes it can become more functional than fulfilling.

If I’m in a relationship I would like to believe it’s mutual but also understanding if the others had a crap day or is tired or just doesn’t want it without applying any pressure or sulking.

For me too much emphasis is put on the actual sex part. People seem to forget foreplay and all that can give without actually needing penetration. Sometimes I just want a kiss and a cuddle and soft slow touches

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By *rHotNottsMan  over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

There’s no rules but it’s an odd one for sure, different by culture and upbringing, past experience . I’ve known the filthiest women never initiate sex and if I didn’t they would happily go a day without. I known it create resentment and end relationships when it’s too one sided.

I think getting this right is an important part of compatibility, some people have sex on the brain 247 and are always playfully touching each other , others aren't and don’t enjoy being jumped on randomly when doing the dishes etc, some dislike panned sex and sone that have kids etc need to plan sex

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We both initiate and it usually comes down to who’s had the idea first

I think it helps us that we know there’s hardly ever a time we don’t want to rip each others clothes off.

Mr

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Morning op

Not in a relationship to initiate.

Fab relationship op what is that?

It does though need to be consented.

Oh I dont know waking up next to your partner and having morning sex if you are both wanting it. Can be very happy day

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By *hrimper36Couple  over a year ago

Central France dept 36

Shag do you kiss your hand to bring to a higher level before you have sex???????

We both start the sex thing.

T

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By * and R cple4Couple  over a year ago

swansea

I just start sucking my husband’s cock he usually gets the hint then ..

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross


"I just start sucking my husband’s cock he usually gets the hint then .."

Causes havoc in Tesco

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By *odgerMooreMan  over a year ago

Nowhere


"I just start sucking my husband’s cock he usually gets the hint then ..

Causes havoc in Tesco"

Unexpected item in the bagging area???

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By *aitonelMan  over a year ago

Away for Christmas

The one with the bigger balls

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think both should be able to initiate although slightly problematic for me because nothing turns me on more than someone else initiating..sometimes I might give a look but after that I just love someone trying to ‘convince’ me I want it

I suppose it’s like anything, if everyone is on the same page and happy it works!

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple  over a year ago

Leeds

We both do, it's hard when it's only one way although he's probably more subtle than me, there's times I don't if I think he's too tired etc but I'd say it's a good mix.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Op.

Initiating sex..

Setting the scene

Run a hot bath

Massage

Dress up

Kissing

Body touches your partner

Cuddles

You should know what your partner wants needs desires.

Tell them you want them.

Compliment how sexy they look

If you know your partner then you should know when not to initiate. Consent on all the above is essential.

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By *TG3Man  over a year ago

Dorchester

Dad

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By *hagTonight OP   Man  over a year ago

From the land of haribos.


"Sex is problematic when it becomes routine…

It’s Sunday so we must…

Or even not trying new things.

I don’t want to sue people get lazy but sometimes it can become more functional than fulfilling.

If I’m in a relationship I would like to believe it’s mutual but also understanding if the others had a crap day or is tired or just doesn’t want it without applying any pressure or sulking.

For me too much emphasis is put on the actual sex part. People seem to forget foreplay and all that can give without actually needing penetration. Sometimes I just want a kiss and a cuddle and soft slow touches "

Yes, it can become problematic as well, when it becomes a routine

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By *he love catsCouple  over a year ago

South Wales

Both of us, it was me on Saturday night and him last night.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS  over a year ago

Central

It should be equal and never pressured to another

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

The one who feels horny first.....

Next !

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By *amelhunterMan  over a year ago

newcastle


"I was listening to something interesting about it and that was of who should initiate sex in a relationship.

They talked about many combinations of it, like, who it should be and if one does it, how many times should they ask their partner for it, also like, what if the other person never asks for sexy time, or not ask so often for it, what about if one want sex often, but the other one doesnt feel having it.

So many question surrounding it.

In my opinion, both should be able to initiate sex, many times people dont think of this, but rather place the blame on each other if they cant work it out.

Maiby one have a special sign they do if they want sex, like kissing their partner on the neck or a gently smack on the bum.

I am single, but it kind of goes the same way if you meet casually. I love to initiate, just by kissing and bringing it to a higher level.

What about you, who is the initiator in your relationship? "

for me, either.

i have been in a relationship where no matter how many hints i dropped or times i explained why i like a woman to initiate/take the lead as much as i do, the penny didnt drop!

relationship ended.

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By *hagTonight OP   Man  over a year ago

From the land of haribos.


"Morning op

Not in a relationship to initiate.

Fab relationship op what is that?

It does though need to be consented.

Oh I dont know waking up next to your partner and having morning sex if you are both wanting it. Can be very happy day

"

Morning becs, same here. I am not in a relationship either. I would say both, it could be normal and fab related and I agree with you that waking up to have morning sex would be a very happy day too

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I was listening to something interesting about it and that was of who should initiate sex in a relationship.

They talked about many combinations of it, like, who it should be and if one does it, how many times should they ask their partner for it, also like, what if the other person never asks for sexy time, or not ask so often for it, what about if one want sex often, but the other one doesnt feel having it.

So many question surrounding it.

In my opinion, both should be able to initiate sex, many times people dont think of this, but rather place the blame on each other if they cant work it out.

Maiby one have a special sign they do if they want sex, like kissing their partner on the neck or a gently smack on the bum.

I am single, but it kind of goes the same way if you meet casually. I love to initiate, just by kissing and bringing it to a higher level.

What about you, who is the initiator in your relationship? "

Both ...both should be on the same wavelength.. everything about that part of being together should be so natural..both should be open for each other always, maybe it won't be everyone's opinion but if it's not what's the other option for each person. ...ask ? ..no one should be held over a barrel for sex...life's too short .

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By *affeine DuskMan  over a year ago

Caerphilly

Interesting queation Shag, very interesting.

Obviously I have a system that works for me:

Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa lives in a secret room in my bedroom.

He played Shang Tsung in the original Mortal Kombat film (1995) and I've hired him indefinitely to live there so that when sex instigation decisions need to happen, I ring a bell and he appears in a lovely dragon green robe and decides for the room if sex should happen.

He's such a lad too, he's always like yeah, shag it up you mad bastards

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I was listening to something interesting about it and that was of who should initiate sex in a relationship.

They talked about many combinations of it, like, who it should be and if one does it, how many times should they ask their partner for it, also like, what if the other person never asks for sexy time, or not ask so often for it, what about if one want sex often, but the other one doesnt feel having it.

So many question surrounding it.

In my opinion, both should be able to initiate sex, many times people dont think of this, but rather place the blame on each other if they cant work it out.

Maiby one have a special sign they do if they want sex, like kissing their partner on the neck or a gently smack on the bum.

I am single, but it kind of goes the same way if you meet casually. I love to initiate, just by kissing and bringing it to a higher level.

What about you, who is the initiator in your relationship?

Both ...both should be on the same wavelength.. everything about that part of being together should be so natural..both should be open for each other always, maybe it won't be everyone's opinion but if it's not what's the other option for each person. ...ask ? ..no one should be held over a barrel for sex...life's too short ."

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By *ittyandtheboyCouple  over a year ago

Behind the bike shed!


"I was listening to something interesting about it and that was of who should initiate sex in a relationship.

They talked about many combinations of it, like, who it should be and if one does it, how many times should they ask their partner for it, also like, what if the other person never asks for sexy time, or not ask so often for it, what about if one want sex often, but the other one doesnt feel having it.

So many question surrounding it.

In my opinion, both should be able to initiate sex, many times people dont think of this, but rather place the blame on each other if they cant work it out.

Maiby one have a special sign they do if they want sex, like kissing their partner on the neck or a gently smack on the bum.

I am single, but it kind of goes the same way if you meet casually. I love to initiate, just by kissing and bringing it to a higher level.

What about you, who is the initiator in your relationship? "

Whoever wants the sex? It’s a two way street!

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By *hagTonight OP   Man  over a year ago

From the land of haribos.


"There’s no rules but it’s an odd one for sure, different by culture and upbringing, past experience . I’ve known the filthiest women never initiate sex and if I didn’t they would happily go a day without. I known it create resentment and end relationships when it’s too one sided.

I think getting this right is an important part of compatibility, some people have sex on the brain 247 and are always playfully touching each other , others aren't and don’t enjoy being jumped on randomly when doing the dishes etc, some dislike panned sex and sone that have kids etc need to plan sex "

Yes, you are right, there are no rules and that is a good point as the one you met, getting it right is the key too

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

In every relationship I've ever had it was almost always me until I got rejected too many times.

It leaves you feeling like you can't. Now I need to be sure I won't be in order to make a move.

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By *ad NannaWoman  over a year ago

East London

People in relationships should have a sex timetable and stick to it.

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By *aith SkynbyrdWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere else


"People in relationships should have a sex timetable and stick to it.

"

Yep. Hot.

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By *hagTonight OP   Man  over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

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By *hagTonight OP   Man  over a year ago

From the land of haribos.


"We both initiate and it usually comes down to who’s had the idea first

I think it helps us that we know there’s hardly ever a time we don’t want to rip each others clothes off.

Mr"

That is good that you both initiate it and yes, that helps to know that too

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By *hagTonight OP   Man  over a year ago

From the land of haribos.


"We both do, it's hard when it's only one way although he's probably more subtle than me, there's times I don't if I think he's too tired etc but I'd say it's a good mix.

Mrs "

That is good that you both do it and yes, it must be hard if just one do it, a good mix of it as you say is good as well

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's a shared responsibility...surely...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Surely it's up to both people in the relationship. Sex is a 2 way thing, and both people in the relationship need to be able to express their wants/needs and initiate sex. It should never be left to the one person.

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By *hagTonight OP   Man  over a year ago

From the land of haribos.


"Surely it's up to both people in the relationship. Sex is a 2 way thing, and both people in the relationship need to be able to express their wants/needs and initiate sex. It should never be left to the one person."
Yes, you are right there, as it is up to both of them as well

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

both parties have the right to initiate.

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