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I'm ugly but I don't care
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"While not the ugliest guy on Fab I know I'm like on the top 100 at least but not bothered either "
There's a lot of blank profiles on here buddy, that's all I'm saying 
Don't put yourself down so much |
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"I'm good at cooking and alright at the sex stuff apparently though, it's all good 
Oh and I lift the seat and put it back down after I've finished peeing, honestly I'm one in a million "
What happens if that's your perception of yourself, but in reality it's the opposite  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm good at cooking and alright at the sex stuff apparently though, it's all good
Oh and I lift the seat and put it back down after I've finished peeing, honestly I'm one in a million "
If you think your ugly,then God help us all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm good at cooking and alright at the sex stuff apparently though, it's all good
Oh and I lift the seat and put it back down after I've finished peeing, honestly I'm one in a million
If you think your ugly,then God help us all "
Was just thinking this myself  |
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"I'm ok looking and shit at cooking and sex stuff. I'm still a catch though right?
All depends on what you do with the seat to be honest.
I don't do anything with it 
FA(shit)F? "
Only interested if you are really shit. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week "
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff. |
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"I'm good at cooking and alright at the sex stuff apparently though, it's all good
Oh and I lift the seat and put it back down after I've finished peeing, honestly I'm one in a million
What happens if that's your perception of yourself, but in reality it's the opposite "
You don't think I lift the seat and put it down again? |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Liverpool |
Remember op! They are just blowing smoke up your arse.
They don't really mean it, just want to get in your pants and then leave you used and ignored once it's all over.
Saying what they think you want to hear. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What's got you in a grumpy mood its Friday 
It's grumpy Friday, I'm setting a new trend
You're not bloody ugly, behave yourself man
I'm always getting told to behave myself "
Oh?  |
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By *EAT..85Woman
over a year ago
Nottingham |
"I'm ok looking and shit at cooking and sex stuff. I'm still a catch though right?
All depends on what you do with the seat to be honest.
I don't do anything with it
FA(shit)F?
Only interested if you are really shit."
I promise to do my worst  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Remember op! They are just blowing smoke up your arse.
They don't really mean it, just want to get in your pants and then leave you used and ignored once it's all over.
Saying what they think you want to hear. "
I second this. |
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"I'm good at cooking and alright at the sex stuff apparently though, it's all good
Oh and I lift the seat and put it back down after I've finished peeing, honestly I'm one in a million
If you think your ugly,then God help us all "
I have my moments |
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"I'm good at cooking and alright at the sex stuff apparently though, it's all good
Oh and I lift the seat and put it back down after I've finished peeing, honestly I'm one in a million
What happens if that's your perception of yourself, but in reality it's the opposite
You don't think I lift the seat and put it down again? "
Definitely not, I reckon you pee all over the closed lid |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have no redeeming qualities.
I am so dark and cynical, people sometimes find what I say funny, but it's purely co-incidental.
Should we be taking you seriously? "
No. He's not even particularly cynical! |
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"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff."
That's a good point, I like fishies and stuff |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff.
That's a good point, I like fishies and stuff "
I'll bake you a cake instead. |
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"Remember op! They are just blowing smoke up your arse.
They don't really mean it, just want to get in your pants and then leave you used and ignored once it's all over.
Saying what they think you want to hear. "
Nobody has ever used me just the once, this is a cruel thought as I'd hate to be used for sex just the one time and then nothing |
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"I'm ok looking and shit at cooking and sex stuff. I'm still a catch though right?
All depends on what you do with the seat to be honest.
I don't do anything with it
FA(shit)F?
Only interested if you are really shit.
I promise to do my worst "
I am sure it will be a miserable experience |
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"I'm good at cooking and alright at the sex stuff apparently though, it's all good
Oh and I lift the seat and put it back down after I've finished peeing, honestly I'm one in a million
What happens if that's your perception of yourself, but in reality it's the opposite
You don't think I lift the seat and put it down again?
Definitely not, I reckon you pee all over the closed lid "
People pay good money for that sort of thing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Remember op! They are just blowing smoke up your arse.
They don't really mean it, just want to get in your pants and then leave you used and ignored once it's all over.
Saying what they think you want to hear.
I second this."
Don't guys like been used and ignored? |
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"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff.
That's a good point, I like fishies and stuff
I'll bake you a cake instead."
I love the cake |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff.
That's a good point, I like fishies and stuff
I'll bake you a cake instead.
I love the cake "
And yet you haven't once come to get it  |
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"I'm okay at the sex stuff, quite good at the cooking and okay looking in a dark room.
But... I won't be boiling your favourite pet in a saucepan.
That's definitely a USP on here. "
I don't have any pets anyway but it's always nice to know that pets are safe around someone |
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"Remember op! They are just blowing smoke up your arse.
They don't really mean it, just want to get in your pants and then leave you used and ignored once it's all over.
Saying what they think you want to hear.
I second this.
Don't guys like been used and ignored? "
It's a mandatory part of being male |
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"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff.
That's a good point, I like fishies and stuff
I'll bake you a cake instead.
I love the cake
And yet you haven't once come to get it "
Jesus Posh, how many cakes have you baked and not told me?
You have my address  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Remember op! They are just blowing smoke up your arse.
They don't really mean it, just want to get in your pants and then leave you used and ignored once it's all over.
Saying what they think you want to hear.
I second this.
Don't guys like been used and ignored?
It's a mandatory part of being male"
Only desperate males you mean!! |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"I'm okay at the sex stuff, quite good at the cooking and okay looking in a dark room.
But... I won't be boiling your favourite pet in a saucepan.
That's definitely a USP on here.
I don't have any pets anyway but it's always nice to know that pets are safe around someone "
Ha! No. It's from Fatal Attraction. Bunny boiler.... the less said about that the better. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff.
That's a good point, I like fishies and stuff
I'll bake you a cake instead.
I love the cake
And yet you haven't once come to get it
Jesus Posh, how many cakes have you baked and not told me?
You have my address "
I'm totally bringing one round one day.
When I've nicked a boat. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Remember op! They are just blowing smoke up your arse.
They don't really mean it, just want to get in your pants and then leave you used and ignored once it's all over.
Saying what they think you want to hear.
I second this.
Don't guys like been used and ignored?
It's a mandatory part of being male
Only desperate males you mean!!"
Be quiet and prepare to be used. |
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"I have no redeeming qualities.
I am so dark and cynical, people sometimes find what I say funny, but it's purely co-incidental.
Should we be taking you seriously?
No. He's not even particularly cynical!"
See nobody takes me seriously. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Remember op! They are just blowing smoke up your arse.
They don't really mean it, just want to get in your pants and then leave you used and ignored once it's all over.
Saying what they think you want to hear.
I second this.
Don't guys like been used and ignored?
It's a mandatory part of being male
Only desperate males you mean!!
Be quiet and prepare to be used."
Lilith I will roundhouse you in the tit |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Remember op! They are just blowing smoke up your arse.
They don't really mean it, just want to get in your pants and then leave you used and ignored once it's all over.
Saying what they think you want to hear.
I second this.
Don't guys like been used and ignored?
It's a mandatory part of being male
Only desperate males you mean!!
Be quiet and prepare to be used.
Lilith I will roundhouse you in the tit "
I love it when you talk dirty. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have no redeeming qualities.
I am so dark and cynical, people sometimes find what I say funny, but it's purely co-incidental.
Should we be taking you seriously?
No. He's not even particularly cynical!
See nobody takes me seriously."
I was being nice!! |
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"Remember op! They are just blowing smoke up your arse.
They don't really mean it, just want to get in your pants and then leave you used and ignored once it's all over.
Saying what they think you want to hear.
I second this.
Don't guys like been used and ignored?
It's a mandatory part of being male
Only desperate males you mean!!"
I think it's a case of picking badly, I've never had sex out of desperation |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I have no redeeming qualities.
I am so dark and cynical, people sometimes find what I say funny, but it's purely co-incidental.
Should we be taking you seriously?
No. He's not even particularly cynical!
See nobody takes me seriously."
|
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"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff.
That's a good point, I like fishies and stuff
I'll bake you a cake instead.
I love the cake
And yet you haven't once come to get it
Jesus Posh, how many cakes have you baked and not told me?
You have my address
I'm totally bringing one round one day.
When I've nicked a boat."
It can't be that difficult, just go to dover and pick one up from the beach |
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"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
One of those is untrue, I reckon.
You're right. I love cooking as long as I don't have to eat it."
That's perfect... I hate cooking but love eating  |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff.
That's a good point, I like fishies and stuff
I'll bake you a cake instead.
I love the cake
And yet you haven't once come to get it
Jesus Posh, how many cakes have you baked and not told me?
You have my address
I'm totally bringing one round one day.
When I've nicked a boat.
It can't be that difficult, just go to dover and pick one up from the beach "
Seems like effort. There's loads just down the road in the harbour. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
One of those is untrue, I reckon.
You're right. I love cooking as long as I don't have to eat it.
That's perfect... I hate cooking but love eating "
And you agreed with the other two |
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"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff.
That's a good point, I like fishies and stuff
I'll bake you a cake instead.
I love the cake
And yet you haven't once come to get it
Jesus Posh, how many cakes have you baked and not told me?
You have my address
I'm totally bringing one round one day.
When I've nicked a boat.
It can't be that difficult, just go to dover and pick one up from the beach
Seems like effort. There's loads just down the road in the harbour."
But I'm guessing you don't know how to hotwire them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Just meet people that need to wear glasses. And accidently sit on them, so they cant see and you are just a blur. Assure them you are handsome, entice them with a steaming pot of something delicious and all will be well. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff.
That's a good point, I like fishies and stuff
I'll bake you a cake instead.
I love the cake
And yet you haven't once come to get it
Jesus Posh, how many cakes have you baked and not told me?
You have my address
I'm totally bringing one round one day.
When I've nicked a boat.
It can't be that difficult, just go to dover and pick one up from the beach
Seems like effort. There's loads just down the road in the harbour.
But I'm guessing you don't know how to hotwire them "
Pffft. Obviously I do.
I'm just not good at lock picking and most of them have locks on the loo door.
I'm gonna need to get in there. |
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"I'm not ugly, I'm told I'm pretty good at sex and I'm a good cook.
I am kinda mean though
I quite like mean girls if they can be corrected
You can't correct someone who's NEVER WRONG  "
Well I'm always right and unless you agree with everything I say then you're definitely wrong now and then |
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"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff.
That's a good point, I like fishies and stuff
I'll bake you a cake instead.
I love the cake
And yet you haven't once come to get it
Jesus Posh, how many cakes have you baked and not told me?
You have my address
I'm totally bringing one round one day.
When I've nicked a boat.
It can't be that difficult, just go to dover and pick one up from the beach
Seems like effort. There's loads just down the road in the harbour.
But I'm guessing you don't know how to hotwire them
Pffft. Obviously I do.
I'm just not good at lock picking and most of them have locks on the loo door.
I'm gonna need to get in there."
You can just squat over side of boat |
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"Just meet people that need to wear glasses. And accidently sit on them, so they cant see and you are just a blur. Assure them you are handsome, entice them with a steaming pot of something delicious and all will be well. "
This would mean sneaking up behind them, knocking their glasses off face and crushing them before they have seen me |
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By *odevilWoman
over a year ago
exeter |
"I'm not ugly, I'm told I'm pretty good at sex and I'm a good cook.
I am kinda mean though
I quite like mean girls if they can be corrected
You can't correct someone who's NEVER WRONG
Well I'm always right and unless you agree with everything I say then you're definitely wrong now and then "
I know its the highest form of flattery and all but can you stop copying me please? |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff.
That's a good point, I like fishies and stuff
I'll bake you a cake instead.
I love the cake
And yet you haven't once come to get it
Jesus Posh, how many cakes have you baked and not told me?
You have my address
I'm totally bringing one round one day.
When I've nicked a boat.
It can't be that difficult, just go to dover and pick one up from the beach
Seems like effort. There's loads just down the road in the harbour.
But I'm guessing you don't know how to hotwire them
Pffft. Obviously I do.
I'm just not good at lock picking and most of them have locks on the loo door.
I'm gonna need to get in there.
You can just squat over side of boat "
Not when I'm holding a cake as well |
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"I'm not ugly, I'm told I'm pretty good at sex and I'm a good cook.
I am kinda mean though
I quite like mean girls if they can be corrected
You can't correct someone who's NEVER WRONG
Well I'm always right and unless you agree with everything I say then you're definitely wrong now and then
I know its the highest form of flattery and all but can you stop copying me please? "
Even though you have said please, I can't agree to stop doing something I have not done... Yet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just meet people that need to wear glasses. And accidently sit on them, so they cant see and you are just a blur. Assure them you are handsome, entice them with a steaming pot of something delicious and all will be well.
This would mean sneaking up behind them, knocking their glasses off face and crushing them before they have seen me "
Sounds like a plan |
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"I'm ugly, hate cooking and shite at the sex.
Ah well.
I'm lighting a candle as we speak and I'll arrange a balloon release thing for you next week
Don't do the balloon thing. Cos of the fishes n stuff.
That's a good point, I like fishies and stuff
I'll bake you a cake instead.
I love the cake
And yet you haven't once come to get it
Jesus Posh, how many cakes have you baked and not told me?
You have my address
I'm totally bringing one round one day.
When I've nicked a boat.
It can't be that difficult, just go to dover and pick one up from the beach
Seems like effort. There's loads just down the road in the harbour.
But I'm guessing you don't know how to hotwire them
Pffft. Obviously I do.
I'm just not good at lock picking and most of them have locks on the loo door.
I'm gonna need to get in there.
You can just squat over side of boat
Not when I'm holding a cake as well"
I don't think you need to hold it the whole journey |
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