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How bad are your nerves on a meet?
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They used to be awful. So bad. Where the first couple of guys asked if I really wanted to be there (yes!).
More recently, a little apprehension, will it be ok, a little butterflies. That's no bad thing. |
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I think excitement and nerves are two sides of the same coin.
I still get the butterflies and the shakes every time, even with people I’ve met before. If they stopped … that would mean the fun had stopped. We don’t want that. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I think excitement and nerves are two sides of the same coin.
I still get the butterflies and the shakes every time, even with people I’ve met before. If they stopped … that would mean the fun had stopped. We don’t want that."
That exactly.
The first kiss calms the terror, but the butterflies stay. |
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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago
west midlands |
"I think excitement and nerves are two sides of the same coin.
I still get the butterflies and the shakes every time, even with people I’ve met before. If they stopped … that would mean the fun had stopped. We don’t want that.
That exactly.
The first kiss calms the terror, but the butterflies stay."
Thats it, I love the butterflies. I still get nervous even seeing someone again I've already met but as soon as I see them the nerves turn to butterflies. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t stress anymore. I used to worry but I am confident in my conversational skills and usually having shared face pics before that I’ll be ok. I think I’d be nervous about the dynamic of first meeting a couple but meh |
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By *TG3Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"How do you cope before or during a meet with stress. Maybe you used to get stressed and are totally fine now or maybe it's just as bad now as it ever was.
Have a great day all.  "
never get stressed they either like me or they don't  |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
I find getting to a person more stressful than actually meeting them.
Twice I felt I was on a wild goose chase and almost went home, but they both worked out fine.
I've got to a pub first and bought drinks while I wait and also met at theirs many times.
In later years I've not wanted to take those risks, due to anxiety and have stopped meeting.
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I am always very nervous.
I think it mostly comes from me being overly self conscious about my foreign accent and grammar skills.
It’s nice though when you meet someone who can make you feel like it’s actually an advantage rather than anything else. |
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By *lexV16Man
over a year ago
Welling |
Not stressed at all to be honest. Was a bit on a start of a Journey but with every meet it subsides to the point I am 99% comfortable.
Quick social beforehand (even the same day) helps to it a lot |
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One of the very few positives, or negatives depending on the situation, of suffering from anhedonia is that there is no nervous anticipation, no excitement and no lasting after effect either.
Flatlining is the norm. |
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"I am always very nervous.
I think it mostly comes from me being overly self conscious about my foreign accent and grammar skills.
It’s nice though when you meet someone who can make you feel like it’s actually an advantage rather than anything else."
It just adds to the person that is you. Who I like  |
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"One of the very few positives, or negatives depending on the situation, of suffering from anhedonia is that there is no nervous anticipation, no excitement and no lasting after effect either.
Flatlining is the norm. "
I just googled anhedonia. Interesting |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My first meet I was a nervous wreck and I really thought I was going to have to cancel ,after that I was fine
I've never met for a couple of years so I guess I will be nervous again |
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Fake it till you make it is something I have to really force.. I tell myself im a super confident woman and just go for it ha for the most part it works.. However every now and then the nerves do hit hard. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
I like them. I've kind of reframed them as positive nervous energy - I'm excited and when I stop feeling that about meeting someone? I'm probably going to stop meeting them.
It's quite obvious because I'll blush/or waffle excitedly at first. It soon becomes more manageable but those butterflies are always there with the right person. |
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Had our first proper meet Sunday evening it was amazing however I was a massive bag of nerves and I think it was quite obvious I struggle lot with being nervous. But the social before hand definitely helped me settle in. It was viewing it not as a meet as just a friendly chat that helped me over come it all. The rest of the night was amazing
B |
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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago
Chippenham Malmesbury area |
I get a little nervous and visibly shake slightly (especially on a first meeting) but this all adds to my excitement so I see it as a positive thing; as soon as I'm naked, all nerves are gone and I'm up and ready for anything  |
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"I am always very nervous.
I think it mostly comes from me being overly self conscious about my foreign accent and grammar skills.
It’s nice though when you meet someone who can make you feel like it’s actually an advantage rather than anything else.
It just adds to the person that is you. Who I like "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I used to get nervous before a first date etc but the last few year I don't get nervous one bit.
I just tell myself, they'll either like you or they won't so be yourself. It is what it is I suppose, stay cool  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you cope before or during a meet with stress. Maybe you used to get stressed and are totally fine now or maybe it's just as bad now as it ever was.
Have a great day all. "
I'm usually Nervous for a bit (as a couple of People (Socials) can attest to) but it usually vanishes after a short time.. As to a Direct Play Meet, I don't know yet lol |
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Flutters of excitement, nerves and butterflies, wondrous emotions that co-exist - and I would be a romantic fool if I ever ignored them.
I get these just before a meet. I'm always assured and confident but I quickly buckle just at the last moment, such as when the train is pulling into the platform blowing its final whistle, as she appears from behind the white steam like a spirit unveiled, and me wondering if she will like me... |
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"I like them. I've kind of reframed them as positive nervous energy - I'm excited and when I stop feeling that about meeting someone? I'm probably going to stop meeting them.
It's quite obvious because I'll blush/or waffle excitedly at first. It soon becomes more manageable but those butterflies are always there with the right person."
I'm with Meli... I like the rush of nerves, anticipation, pushing out of my comfort...  |
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"Flutters of excitement, nerves and butterflies, wondrous emotions that co-exist - and I would be a romantic fool if I ever ignored them.
I get these just before a meet. I'm always assured and confident but I quickly buckle just at the last moment, such as when the train is pulling into the platform blowing its final whistle, as she appears from behind the white steam like a spirit unveiled, and me wondering if she will like me..."
Why do I now picture you as a young Trevor Howard? |
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I always get nervous even if it's someone I have met several times. I used to let it really get to me and almost pulled out of a couple of meets but now I channel it into excitement and anticipation rather than fear. |
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I think it’s a lot easier for couples that meet together than it is for singles .I have my husband to hold my hand and when I start waffling on in nervousness he will jump in for me  ..I couldn’t imagine walking into somewhere on my own for a meet .. |
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"How do you cope before or during a meet with stress. Maybe you used to get stressed and are totally fine now or maybe it's just as bad now as it ever was.
Have a great day all. "
Diazepam n rum, perfect solution to those said nerves |
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"Flutters of excitement, nerves and butterflies, wondrous emotions that co-exist - and I would be a romantic fool if I ever ignored them.
I get these just before a meet. I'm always assured and confident but I quickly buckle just at the last moment, such as when the train is pulling into the platform blowing its final whistle, as she appears from behind the white steam like a spirit unveiled, and me wondering if she will like me...
·
Why do I now picture you as a young Trevor Howard? "
•
I'm still pining for my Laura Jesson. |
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"Flutters of excitement, nerves and butterflies, wondrous emotions that co-exist - and I would be a romantic fool if I ever ignored them.
I get these just before a meet. I'm always assured and confident but I quickly buckle just at the last moment, such as when the train is pulling into the platform blowing its final whistle, as she appears from behind the white steam like a spirit unveiled, and me wondering if she will like me...
·
Why do I now picture you as a young Trevor Howard?
•
I'm still pining for my Laura Jesson. "
Nothing lasts really. Neither happiness nor despair. Not even life lasts very long. There'll come a time in the future when I shan't mind about this anymore, when I can look back and say quite peacefully and cheerfully how silly I was.
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I get nervous and then clumsy!
I love the butterflies/excitement, but it can sometimes edge towards anxiety- which is a relatively recent thing, so I do have to work on not overthinking things.
Once I am naked with them, I am fine though x |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"How do you cope before or during a meet with stress. Maybe you used to get stressed and are totally fine now or maybe it's just as bad now as it ever was.
Have a great day all. "
I haven't met anyone solo in over a decade.
Will be interesting the first time that happens again.....
A |
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"I think it’s a lot easier for couples that meet together than it is for singles .I have my husband to hold my hand and when I start waffling on in nervousness he will jump in for me ..I couldn’t imagine walking into somewhere on my own for a meet .."
Yes totally agree. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always feel a flutter of excitement, anticipation and maybe a few nerves. If I didn't I'd wonder why I was there.
There's something so lovely about butterflies even when you've already got to know the person and it's far from the first time.
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By *adMerWoman
over a year ago
Sandwich |
I have only had a serious attack of nerves on one occasion. That really sinking feeling in my gut that it was a bad idea. Dread. So I cancelled.
Mostly I just feel nervous anticipation and excitement for meeting a new person. |
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I suffer badly with nerves, which is one of the many reasons I no longer meet. It’s just not worth the methane. 
