FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Hard being a single male on here

Hard being a single male on here

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By *rustworthy honest guy OP Man over a year ago

Huddersfield

Just looking for female and couples to chat with

I know I'm not the best looker out there but have a heart of gold and respect

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By *aughtyTimesBL5Man over a year ago

bolton

I feel your pain.

It’s impossible for a single male on here

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Try being a single woman here and then come back and tell me which is hardest

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By *atnip make me purrWoman over a year ago

Reading

Is not impossible. Lots of men get meets. They have great profiles and many use the forums to build connections.

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By *rozac_fairyCouple over a year ago

Tamworth

"Just looking for female and couples to chat with

I know I'm not the best looker out there but have a heart of gold and respect "

I'd say you're not doing terribly for 6 weeks with 2 veris already.

Generally the advice though is to make sure your profile is optimal... detailed bio, a good selection of pics etc.

Then look for socials, clubs etc near you and get out and speak to people rather than just sitting on fab

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’m on Fab, and I find it hard too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Try be a robot on here and then tell me if it's harder than being a man or woman.

Ain't no human women looking for robot cock.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’m on fab and ummm ok it can be hard

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

It's difficult for all demographics in different ways. It does depend somewhat on the way you present yourself at first glance

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I feel your pain.

It’s impossible for a single male on here "

Literally impossible.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Try be a robot on here and then tell me if it's harder than being a man or woman.

Ain't no human women looking for robot cock.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is not impossible. Lots of men get meets. They have great profiles and many use the forums to build connections. "

Name one man that gets meets from this site?

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By *aitonelMan over a year ago

Travelling

It is as hard as you set for yourself. Your expectations.

It is no more difficult for men or women than the other. Just their "difficulty" is set in different ways.

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By *otSoPoshWoman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I’m on Fab, and I find it hard too.

I've found hard stuff on fab too

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Try be a robot on here and then tell me if it's harder than being a man or woman.

Ain't no human women looking for robot cock.

Robot? Sign me the fuck up

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By *havennaturistsCouple over a year ago

Banff

The number of single guys who ask us to verify them without even seeing them on a webcam or in a photograph, let alone in the flesh is staggering. Had one again yesterday, been on the site about 4 weeks.

It doesn't help the cause!

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By *eedsanewusernameMan over a year ago

Mainly under the bed...

"I feel your pain.

It’s impossible for a single male on here "

It's not impossible.

Having a reasonable approach and outlook doesn't guarantee success.

I found it easier to visit a club (and managed to go with some people I'd chatted to first so I wasn't one of the creepy single guys just walking about wanking away!) as an ice breaker. I've met and played with a host of people who ordinarily would have binned off my reasonably eloquent messages in their "bulk delete cull" that is common when you're getting 200 dick pic/wanna fuck messages per day.

It's still a difficult proposition trying to be visible with people I've not met in clubs; but I now have a large circle of friends and acquaintances who have opened doors and introduced me to other people in the lifestyle.

All depends I suppose if you're just after a quick dip of your wick or are looking to play regularly with similar minded folk who appreciate some effort above and beyond "hi"!

I'd love to say you'll always get more out if you put more in. But it's not an equal balance nor that scientific.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I feel your pain.

It’s impossible for a single male on here

Literally impossible. "

I’m sure it’s not. Otherwise no one would bother. Right?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don’t care, I’m having fun anyway. No one talks to me either

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It’s difficult on here for me but maybe that’s because I’m picky

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I feel your pain.

It’s impossible for a single male on here

Literally impossible.

I’m sure it’s not. Otherwise no one would bother. Right? "

WRONG! Men are crazy

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/07/23 11:58:43]

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I feel your pain.

It’s impossible for a single male on here

Literally impossible.

I’m sure it’s not. Otherwise no one would bother. Right?

WRONG! Men are crazy

Them's fighting words around here

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It is Difficult, but as some of the Ladies state, its worse for them. You just need to read Profiles, message accordingly, and don't send Dick pics unless asked. Politeness and Respect are greatly received but never get pushy.... And... Take rejection with a pinch of salt

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By *eardedwonder999Man over a year ago

Worcester

It's harder than trying to sell ice to Eskimos... Good job I don't take it seriously and I'm only on her for the shits and giggles

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Impossible if you don't want yo show your face in public pictures..ah well

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I feel your pain.

It’s impossible for a single male on here

Literally impossible.

I’m sure it’s not. Otherwise no one would bother. Right?

WRONG! Men are crazy

Them's fighting words around here

Oh shit. Was that misa- nvm

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Impossible if you don't want yo show your face in public pictures..ah well"

That's interesting, because almost no one I've met has their face out in public.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman over a year ago

Reading

"I feel your pain.

It’s impossible for a single male on here

Literally impossible. "

Oh hush you. You do very well.

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I feel your pain.

It’s impossible for a single male on here

Literally impossible.

I’m sure it’s not. Otherwise no one would bother. Right?

WRONG! Men are crazy

Them's fighting words around here

Oh shit. Was that misa- nvm "

Now you've done it

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By *ou only live onceMan over a year ago

London

"Try be a robot on here and then tell me if it's harder than being a man or woman.

Ain't no human women looking for robot cock.

The only robot I'm interested in is Janelle Monae. Janelle, send me a PM if you see this...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not as hard as my cock gets...

Crude. Yes.

True. Yes.

Put yourself out there. There's plenty of people to talk to. No ones scrolling through here like auto trader.

Don't fall into the single guy trap of mass messaging dick pics to everyone you find hot (my inbox can't handle anymore!)

You need a unique selling point. My USP. Is that I absolutely do not care or apologise how much of a tit I make of myself. I'm here for fun and naked pictures (preferably female) but I won't lie I can challenge a wank over a man (so long as you have boobs, long hair and a firm looking arse) (please if you fit the above, and are male. Don't send me pictures!!!)

Just have fun. Don't take it seriously. *peace sign*

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By *inkyDom96Man over a year ago

Yarmouth

"Try being a single woman here and then come back and tell me which is hardest

I don’t see many posts about the struggles of being a single female being a single male is way more difficult, I would much rather be inundated with messages everyday and pick and choose who I meet where as us guys have to battle against 100s of other guys with a unique message that’s not a boring like “how are you” but can’t be to forward and to the point like “wanna fuck” it’s very difficult for a guy to stand out where as if a female messages a guy saying “wanna fuck” 99.999% of the time the guy will message back with a yes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Impossible if you don't want yo show your face in public pictures..ah well

That's interesting, because almost no one I've met has their face out in public. "

We wear masks in public

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I feel your pain.

It’s impossible for a single male on here

Literally impossible.

I’m sure it’s not. Otherwise no one would bother. Right?

WRONG! Men are crazy

Them's fighting words around here

Oh shit. Was that misa- nvm

Now you've done it

Out

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I feel your pain.

It’s impossible for a single male on here

Literally impossible.

Oh hush you. You do very well. "

Easy when you’re pretty like me

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Try being a single woman here and then come back and tell me which is hardest

Bless your heart.

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By *entle_lover_xMan over a year ago

Great Dunmow

"Just looking for female and couples to chat with

I know I'm not the best looker out there but have a heart of gold and respect "

Seems like you are doing something right and better than most. Also see you go to house parties. If you are doing that sure will end up meeting lots. They are a great place to network and make friends.

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Impossible if you don't want yo show your face in public pictures..ah well

That's interesting, because almost no one I've met has their face out in public.

We wear masks in public

Now that's what I'm talking about

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By *eedsanewusernameMan over a year ago

Mainly under the bed...

"Try being a single woman here and then come back and tell me which is hardest

Bud, if you get the chance, have a listen to the absolute shit most guys send lassies on here.

Abusive messages.

Dick pics.

"Hi, wanna fuck?".

Now repeat that 200-300 times a day when a lassie posts an update pic or status update.

You wonder why they miss out "decent" lads when 80-90% are fucktards towards them?

Then don't forget the guys who get a meet and then ghost the lassie. Bet that inspires faith and confidence in single-mandome!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have no expectations on here. Some people see my name and think "oh god. What's he going to say now"

Others think

"Just fuck off will you"

Others think

"Does he really look like a jacket potato?"

It's all about perspective. Just be authentically you.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You been on here for 6 weeks, had 2 meets in that time.. that pretty good going. Most men would give their right testicle to have your luck

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By *imisugarWoman over a year ago

Rugby

"Just looking for female and couples to chat with

I know I'm not the best looker out there but have a heart of gold and respect "

You've had 2 verified meets recently. You are doing so much better than the majority of single mailles on here.

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Try being a single woman here and then come back and tell me which is hardest

Bud, if you get the chance, have a listen to the absolute shit most guys send lassies on here.

Abusive messages.

Dick pics.

"Hi, wanna fuck?".

Now repeat that 200-300 times a day when a lassie posts an update pic or status update.

You wonder why they miss out "decent" lads when 80-90% are fucktards towards them?

Then don't forget the guys who get a meet and then ghost the lassie. Bet that inspires faith and confidence in single-mandome!"

Then there are the messages where they get to illegal kinks before you know what hit you.

I learned quickly that a first message "can I ask you a question?" had a high correlation with second messages that would make my breakfast rebound on me.

No, I'm not going to be specific, because they're topics that are so bad they can't be discussed on the forum

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Lol the weekly boohoo thread from single male

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Single straight men are starting to make my head wobble.

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By *aitonelMan over a year ago

Travelling

All I see are high expectations and entitlement across all of the profile types male/female/tv/ts/couple none of these fuckers are immune from having difficulty nor causing difficulty for others.

Funny that, isn't it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"All I see are high expectations and entitlement across all of the profile types male/female/tv/ts/couple none of these fuckers are immune from having difficulty nor causing difficulty for others.

Funny that, isn't it."

I find it soooo hard

I've stopped giving advice after this one. It narrows the pool down if everyone does the same. *shrugs*

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By *otSoPoshWoman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"All I see are high expectations and entitlement across all of the profile types male/female/tv/ts/couple none of these fuckers are immune from having difficulty nor causing difficulty for others.

Funny that, isn't it.

I find it soooo hard

I've stopped giving advice after this one. It narrows the pool down if everyone does the same. *shrugs*

Could I find you two hard please?

Not asking for a friend. Asking for me.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"All I see are high expectations and entitlement across all of the profile types male/female/tv/ts/couple none of these fuckers are immune from having difficulty nor causing difficulty for others.

Funny that, isn't it.

I find it soooo hard

I've stopped giving advice after this one. It narrows the pool down if everyone does the same. *shrugs*

Could I find you two hard please?

Not asking for a friend. Asking for me. "

We're still on strike after yesterday.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’m on Fab, and I find it hard too.

I've found hard stuff on fab too

A sexy woman definitely would find me hard.

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By *aitonelMan over a year ago

Travelling

"All I see are high expectations and entitlement across all of the profile types male/female/tv/ts/couple none of these fuckers are immune from having difficulty nor causing difficulty for others.

Funny that, isn't it.

I find it soooo hard

I've stopped giving advice after this one. It narrows the pool down if everyone does the same. *shrugs*

Could I find you two hard please?

Not asking for a friend. Asking for me.

We're still on strike after yesterday."

Yeah!

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By *iss DevilWoman over a year ago

Bedford

"Just looking for female and couples to chat with

I know I'm not the best looker out there but have a heart of gold and respect "

If you're just looking to chat rather than meet (as your post suggests), you're going to find it hard. As most women and couples on here are looking to meet rather than just chat.

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By *otSoPoshWoman over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"All I see are high expectations and entitlement across all of the profile types male/female/tv/ts/couple none of these fuckers are immune from having difficulty nor causing difficulty for others.

Funny that, isn't it.

I find it soooo hard

I've stopped giving advice after this one. It narrows the pool down if everyone does the same. *shrugs*

Could I find you two hard please?

Not asking for a friend. Asking for me.

We're still on strike after yesterday.

Yeah! "

You two have changed since you got together. You used to like me

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By *iscean_dreamMan over a year ago

Llanelli

I'm on fab and I touched myself just to be sure but I can confirm it's hard

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By *ittlebirdWoman over a year ago

The Big Smoke

Ooh I like hard… it’s my favourite

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple over a year ago

Halifax

It's not easy op ,but lots of single men do well here ,many in the forums.

Jack did ok as a single male before we got together.Theres no magic formulas ,but he attended clubs/socials and was friendly & polite to women + couples.

He also joined in on the forums ,which is where we met.so don't give up op.

Miss

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's certainly hard trying to find a meet on here, I'm definitely very polite when messaging and not at all pushy but alas I've not had any luck at all

I've attended clubs and still not having any luck

I must be just either ugly or not attractive at all to anyone who I have messaged or spoken to in a club

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By *he Silver FuxMan over a year ago

Uttoxeter

"Is not impossible. Lots of men get meets. They have great profiles and many use the forums to build connections.

Name one man that gets meets from this site?"

My name is..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is not impossible. Lots of men get meets. They have great profiles and many use the forums to build connections.

Name one man that gets meets from this site?

My name is.."

What?

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By *atty CoramWoman over a year ago

Wimbledon

"Try being a single woman here and then come back and tell me which is hardest

Now repeat that 200-300 times a day when a lassie posts an update pic or status update.

You wonder why they miss out "decent" lads when 80-90% are fucktards towards them?

Then don't forget the guys who get a meet and then ghost the lassie. Bet that inspires faith and confidence in single-mandome!

Then there are the messages where they get to illegal kinks before you know what hit you.

I learned quickly that a first message "can I ask you a question?" had a high correlation with second messages that would make my breakfast rebound on me.

No, I'm not going to be specific, because they're topics that are so bad they can't be discussed on the forum

I dont reply/immediately block the can I ask you a question brigade because - technically theyve already asked a question and therefore the message is a ploy to get my attention.

Im petty like that.

Plus no good ever came from opening those floodgates.

No one who asks to ask a question ever has anything of substance to say.

In my opinion, the struggle is more painful for some men on here (the ones with the wrong expectations and outlook maybe). As a woman, I can block all messages; contact men myself; call the shots if you will. I can also log off altogether.

Sure, men can do the same but some cannot - it seems- turn off their sexual urges /cravings/expectations in the same way. I dont require or expect sex. If anything - being on here makes me want it less.

And perhaps therein lies the problem: Im on a *sex* site with my tits out (they are great tits) but I dont want sex... unless its on my terms and no one has the time to go into Ts and Cs do they? Its just not sexy.

disclaimer: my apostrophe/speech mark button is broken.. but in the words of Queen Bey you wont break my soul

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By *atnip make me purrWoman over a year ago

Reading

"Is not impossible. Lots of men get meets. They have great profiles and many use the forums to build connections.

Name one man that gets meets from this site?

My name is..

What? "

All the men on my veris for a start!

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By *hunky GentMan over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

If a guy like me can get meets then anybody can.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Just looking for female and couples to chat with

I know I'm not the best looker out there but have a heart of gold and respect "

Dude, it’s honestly really not. I am as average as a cup of tea, my face is not made for tinder style dating and I do fine.

It’s more about the profile, the personality and, especially with couples, respecting both partners. With women, you wink or send a message, add some humour, link it to one of their photos or their profile. Do not cut and paste, do not send a dick photo and absolutely never ever say ‘panties’.

You won’t get to shag anyone tonight, but over time you will have success

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By *angerouslemaisonsMan over a year ago

Peterborough

Make some forum friends and visit a club stop thinking about getting your dick wet and focus on building real connections

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By *eroLondonMan over a year ago

Covent Garden

"If a guy like me can get meets then anybody can.

•

Ah, but you are Peterborough's finest and a prince amongst men.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Your playing that alot today fluff.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If a fat effeminate queer the wrong side of 49 can do ok then anyone can.

Actually that could be a good motivational meme.

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By *hunky GentMan over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"If a guy like me can get meets then anybody can.

•

Ah, but you are Peterborough's finest and a prince amongst men."

This is true.

I suppose being this awesome does have it's advantages

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Damn that violin emoji!

And Boy of Wonders abs.

Yeah I’m average and haven’t had any meets…I’ve not tried that hard anyway, and I’ve probably sent a grand total of 5 messages out. I’m not bothered.

Just chill guys. Good things come in time.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Your playing that alot today fluff."

It’s a rediscovered talent

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By *hunky GentMan over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Your playing that alot today fluff.

It’s a rediscovered talent

Your wrist action is fantastic.

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By *rHotNottsMan over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"Make some forum friends and visit a club stop thinking about getting your dick wet and focus on building real connections "

Or just write a message that has her snailing on her chair, uncurling in anticipation of a big hard cock. Sometimes it works

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By *ittlebirdWoman over a year ago

The Big Smoke

Your playing that alot today fluff.

It’s a rediscovered talent

Can you play that teeny tiny one too? I think this thread requires it

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By *r-8-BBCMan over a year ago

LONDON

Women who say its hard, it's because your picky. Not every guy is 6'2, built like the hulk and in touch with his feminine side

literally tripping over dicks

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Your playing that alot today fluff.

It’s a rediscovered talent

Can you play that teeny tiny one too? I think this thread requires it

Lemme put my reading glasses on and go and find it

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By *he Silver FuxMan over a year ago

Uttoxeter

"Is not impossible. Lots of men get meets. They have great profiles and many use the forums to build connections.

Name one man that gets meets from this site?

My name is..

What? "

Slim Shady and I’m drowning in eager clunge on this site. I have to ask not to be verified so that my Verification Odometer doesn’t exceed male slut mileage.

Market yourself better on your profile. Go to socials. Go to clubs.

Accommodate if you possibly can, there is huge number of women and couples where their very first requirement is you can provide somewhere to fuck.

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By *oeofsussexMan over a year ago

Eastbourne

Ha! Even worse being a married man on here!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Women who say its hard, it's because your picky. Not every guy is 6'2, built like the hulk and in touch with his feminine side

literally tripping over dicks

Tbf I’m picky too. You have to be in this life.

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By *TG3Man over a year ago

Dorchester

"Just looking for female and couples to chat with

I know I'm not the best looker out there but have a heart of gold and respect "
hey its life here

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By *naswingdressWoman over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I dont reply/immediately block the can I ask you a question brigade because - technically theyve already asked a question and therefore the message is a ploy to get my attention.

Im petty like that.

Plus no good ever came from opening those floodgates.

No one who asks to ask a question ever has anything of substance to say.

disclaimer: my apostrophe/speech mark button is broken.. but in the words of Queen Bey you wont break my soul"

Oh I've learned

But yes. I think there's an expectation mismatch. I didn't know much about these kinds of places when I first joined Fab, and thought "no one will be interested in me but I'll give it a month and see". The rest is history, etc.

I think some people - not just men, but more men than others - struggle to understand the complexity of motivations people have, and that their desire doesn't equate to mutual desire. Or, alternatively, that a woman saying "I want to have sex" doesn't mean "I want to have sex *with you*".

I've had days when I've been so horny I've been crawling up the walls, looked at the prospects, sighed, and gone to bed ignoring the horn.