FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Build your perfect partner for £5
Build your perfect partner for £5
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Saw this on Facebook & thought I'd create a Fab version.
Choose from the following (NO negotiating!)
Fabulous face £3
Funny as hell £2
Honest + true £2
Einstein £2
Nice norks £2
Gym fit £2
Kinky £2
Ginormous cock £2
Thick thighs £1
Beautiful bottom £1
Beard bro £1
Natty dresser £1 |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Liverpool |
Can I really not just keep the money?
I mess up the perfect partner anyway |
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"Can I really not just keep the money?
I mess up the perfect partner anyway"
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Can I really not just keep the money?
I mess up the perfect partner anyway"
Pick an imperfect one then |
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That's a hard one
Funny
Honest
Bum
Mrs |
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Funny as hell, Einstein and the bum but this one is optional just had to spend the last quid |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Funny
Honest
Beautiful bum"
Bums are going down well |
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Easy funny,honest and thick thighs. |
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Gym fit £2
Funny as hell £2
Beautiful bottom £1
That’s my budget gone pop, now where is she  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Gym fit £2
Funny as hell £2
Beautiful bottom £1
That’s my budget gone pop, now where is she "
Watch out for the email |
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You mean I’ll actually receive a message?
Wait I’m asking me mum for another fiver!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Perfect woman.
Funny as hell £2
Kinky £2
With a beard £1   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"You mean I’ll actually receive a message?
Wait I’m asking me mum for another fiver!!!"
I said watch out for an email. I didn't say from whom. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Perfect woman.
Funny as hell £2
Kinky £2
With a beard £1 "
Well that would be quite kinky |
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Funny, kinky, beard.
I would have picked honest instead of beard but ran out of change  |
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So to pick a perfect man will cost £5 right?
How much does the equivalent cost for the female version?
I'm guessing at least £150!!   |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
Fabulous face £3
Honest + true £2
What more could you want ? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'm now thinking of the features I could have added.
professional
Heavy cummer
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Funny, kinky, beard.
I would have picked honest instead of beard but ran out of change "
Fingers crossed he's an honest beard bro! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Fabulous face and funny as hell. That’s all I need. |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
Funny as hell £2
Nice norks £2
Beautiful bottom £1
.
Tbh - if she's going to meet me then her SOH will need to be priceless. |
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Ain't gonna get much for a fiver. Can I build them in a Home Bargains instead? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So to pick a perfect man will cost £5 right?
How much does the equivalent cost for the female version?
I'm guessing at least £150!! "
Oh how I laughed |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Ain't gonna get much for a fiver. Can I build them in a Home Bargains instead?"
You can do what you like, lad! |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
I'll give my fiver to someone who needs it because I'm charitable like that. |
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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago
MADERIA Wherever I lay my hat |
Honest and funny as hell please. I've got a quid left to play with so can I spend that on someone with stamina for days?  |
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What's the "Wish" version to this shopping list like?  |
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I can donate my £5 as Mrs is already perfect  |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
Chunky - £4.99
Just saying. |
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[Removed by poster at 14/07/23 11:56:27] |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'll give my fiver to someone who needs it because I'm charitable like that. "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Honest and funny as hell please. I've got a quid left to play with so can I spend that on someone with stamina for days? "
None of my £1 offers appealed? Maybe I should put average dick on the list for a quid? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"[Money removed by poster at 14/07/23 11:56:27]"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Funny, bearded, cock |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Funny, bearded, cock "
Ta-rah! First cock requested!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Kinky. Honest and true. Beautiful bum.  |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"Funny, bearded, cock "
You called. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Face, bum. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Honest & True £2 do I get the change? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Honest & True £2 do I get the change? "
No but thanks for the tip, it's appreciated. I shall buy a gigantic cock and a bearded bro for myself. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Anyone else got a spare fiver? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Face and funny |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Face and funny "
Not to be confused with funny face |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Right, so that's £19 I owe you! Do you give change? |
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By *aggonerMan
over a year ago
for a penny |
Honest + true £2
Kinky £2
Thick thighs £1
Does it show that I’m working to a budget?
BTW if anyone can’t afford the beard, I have one anyway.
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I'm going to need an advance on next week's pocket money...
But I'll take a pretty face and funny for starters. |
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By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago
Deepest darkest Peru |
Fabulous face and funny as hell works for me |
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Ginormous cock £2+£1
Funny as Hell £2
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"Ginormous cock £2+£1
Funny as Hell £2
"
Sounds like your talking about me!! |
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Einstein, norks and thick thighs. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Kinky
Thick thighs
Honest and true |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Funny.
Gym
Beautiful bottom
A £5 well spent |
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Mrs- funny as hell honest and true Matty dresser
Mr- beautiful face and honest&true |
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Oh yes, £5 well spent...
Funny as hell £2
Kinky £2
Beautiful bottom £1
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Fabulous face and funny as hell will do.
I wanted honest and true too but I'm skint. |
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By *xydadbodMan
over a year ago
Milton keynes |
Ooh, here goes
Honest and true
Funny as hell
Beautiful bottom
.. wait? What do you mean not in stock?  |
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By *adMerWoman
over a year ago
Sandwich |
Honest & true
Funny as hell
Thick thighs |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Right, so that's £19 I owe you! Do you give change? "
NINETEEN POUNDS! How many men do you want? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Ooh, here goes
Honest and true
Funny as hell
Beautiful bottom
.. wait? What do you mean not in stock? "
 There's just a slight delay, check back next week |
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"Anyone else got a spare fiver?"
Yeah, have mine. |
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Thick thighs £1
Beautiful bottom £1
£3 saved! |
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By *mber81Woman
over a year ago
Chorley, Eng |
"Saw this on Facebook & thought I'd create a Fab version.
Choose from the following (NO negotiating!)
Fabulous face £3
Funny as hell £2
Honest + true £2
Einstein £2
Nice norks £2
Gym fit £2
Kinky £2
Ginormous cock £2
Thick thighs £1
Beautiful bottom £1
Beard bro £1
Natty dresser £1"
Funny as hell £2
Honest + true £2
And I am investing the other pound in the hope that one day I can add on kinky, Einstein and thighs. But if my investment brings no returns I am still happy with my original choice. |
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Funny, honest, bum
Though to be honest I'd have gone for bum if it was £5
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By *mber81Woman
over a year ago
Chorley, Eng |
"Funny, honest, bum
Though to be honest I'd have gone for bum if it was £5
"
A funny and honest bum? My arse is hysterical the pics are fairly honest. |
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I'm waiting for the bank holiday sale prices  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Thick thighs £1
Beautiful bottom £1
£3 saved!"
Can I interest you in a fabulous face upgrade? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Funny, honest, bum
Though to be honest I'd have gone for bum if it was £5
"
Next time it might be!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Can I just buy a Wetherspoons breakfast instead? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Can I just buy a Wetherspoons breakfast instead? "
You can get a breakfast for under a fiver? Wow. It's your cash! But if you weren't going to Spoons what would you go for? |
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Funny as hell, thick thighs, nice bum and save a quid for an irn bru |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Funny, honest and Bum x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Funny, honest and bum please |
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Can I chip another pound in n have
Einstein,
Funny,
Honest? |
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"Funny, honest, bum
Though to be honest I'd have gone for bum if it was £5
A funny and honest bum? My arse is hysterical the pics are fairly honest."
Amber, you have a great arse, the thoughts it inspires are unfit for the annals of such a prestigious forum. Grown men would cry; police would turn in their badges.
I simply do not have the funds to define your glory. One would have to sell all their hotels and mortgage Mayfair. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Funny, honest and bum please "
Good choice. Funny honest bums are in stock. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't need a fabulous face, just not an ugly one, so I reckon that's half price at £1.50
Again, I don't need funny as hell, just funny so that's £1
Gym - ish fit, call it £1.50
And a slightly above average cock for £1 |
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"
I don't need a fabulous face, just not an ugly one, so I reckon that's half price at £1.50
Again, I don't need funny as hell, just funny so that's £1
Gym - ish fit, call it £1.50
And a slightly above average cock for £1"
Great, you can slide into my DMs now, congratulations on your find XoXo |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
I don't need a fabulous face, just not an ugly one, so I reckon that's half price at £1.50
Again, I don't need funny as hell, just funny so that's £1
Gym - ish fit, call it £1.50
And a slightly above average cock for £1"
NO NEGOTIATING ya cheeky mare |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It can't be done.
I'd prefer to be alone! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I don't need a fabulous face, just not an ugly one, so I reckon that's half price at £1.50
Again, I don't need funny as hell, just funny so that's £1
Gym - ish fit, call it £1.50
And a slightly above average cock for £1
NO NEGOTIATING ya cheeky mare "
The threads 2 days old, I figured there'd be a sale on? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I don't need a fabulous face, just not an ugly one, so I reckon that's half price at £1.50
Again, I don't need funny as hell, just funny so that's £1
Gym - ish fit, call it £1.50
And a slightly above average cock for £1
Great, you can slide into my DMs now, congratulations on your find XoXo"
Slide into me |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
I don't need a fabulous face, just not an ugly one, so I reckon that's half price at £1.50
Again, I don't need funny as hell, just funny so that's £1
Gym - ish fit, call it £1.50
And a slightly above average cock for £1
NO NEGOTIATING ya cheeky mare
The threads 2 days old, I figured there'd be a sale on?"
Mebbe, but I set the prices! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It can't be done.
I'd prefer to be alone!"
Oh dear (me too, tbf ) |
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Funny as hell £2
Thick thighs £1
Beautiful bottom £1
Natty dresser £1 |
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What the hell is natty dresser? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What the hell is natty dresser?"
Nero |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Double nice norks and you can keep the change. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Fabulous face £3
Honest + true £2
Thats worth a hell of a lot more than a fiver!
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
Honest + true £2
Someone else can have my £3 |
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I'll take the face and funny as hell. If I'm attracted to someone's face then the rest of the bod doesn't matter.
J |
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"What the hell is natty dresser?
Nero"
Caffee Nero?
Or Nero as in water in greek?
Why is the coffee and water needing to be dressed!
Why do I have to.pay £1 for it! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Honest + true £2
Someone else can have my £3"
Ooh me please. |
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Gym fit £2
Kinky £2
Natty dresser £1
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Honest + true £2
Someone else can have my £3
Ooh me please."
Deal |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Honest + true £2
Someone else can have my £3
Ooh me please.
Deal "
I'm adding kinky and beard.
I'll send you pics as a thankyou. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone have one spare euro please? I need 6 "
Have my 5 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If other people can have £8 I will too!
Fabulous face £3
Funny as hell £2
Honest + true £2
With the spare £1 may as throw in a nice bum too. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Double nice norks and you can keep the change."
Thank ye kindly |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Fabulous face £3
Honest + true £2
Thats worth a hell of a lot more than a fiver!
"
Bargains galore at Sally's House of ...erm. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What the hell is natty dresser?
Nero
Caffee Nero?
Or Nero as in water in greek?
Why is the coffee and water needing to be dressed!
Why do I have to.pay £1 for it!"
Nero is paying for it. All good! |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Honest + true £2
Someone else can have my £3
Ooh me please.
Deal
I'm adding kinky and beard.
I'll send you pics as a thankyou. "
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Can I have, fabulous face, Beautiful derriere, and hairy muff?
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Liverpool |
"Honest + true £2
Someone else can have my £3
Ooh me please.
Deal
I'm adding kinky and beard.
I'll send you pics as a thankyou.
Ummmm hello? What about me?
"
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Funny as hell, nice norks, beautiful bum |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Can I have, fabulous face, Beautiful derriere, and hairy muff?
"
searches everywhere for hairy muff |
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"What the hell is natty dresser?
Nero
Caffee Nero?
Or Nero as in water in greek?
Why is the coffee and water needing to be dressed!
Why do I have to.pay £1 for it!
Nero is paying for it. All good! "
•
I don't even know what "norks" are.  |
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"searches everywhere for hairy muff "
You and me both, Sally. You and me both. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Funny, honest, beard |
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"Funny, honest, beard "
I was about to go trim the beard but now I’ve changed my mind. Can’t think why. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"searches everywhere for hairy muff
You and me both, Sally. You and me both."
An hour ago I was full on Chewbacca, more naked mole rat now. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"searches everywhere for hairy muff
You and me both, Sally. You and me both.
An hour ago I was full on Chewbacca, more naked mole rat now. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Funny, honest, beard
I was about to go trim the beard but now I’ve changed my mind. Can’t think why. "
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"An hour ago I was full on Chewbacca, more naked mole rat now. "
You spent an hour on self-care? You’ve changed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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only need £4
Funny as hell £2
Honest + true £2 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"An hour ago I was full on Chewbacca, more naked mole rat now.
You spent an hour on self-care? You’ve changed."
Well I'm certainly a few pounds lighter now
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"searches everywhere for hairy muff
You and me both, Sally. You and me both.
An hour ago I was full on Chewbacca, more naked mole rat now. "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"searches everywhere for hairy muff
You and me both, Sally. You and me both."
I will add it next time so you can buy your perfect partner RTG. |
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"An hour ago I was full on Chewbacca, more naked mole rat now.
You spent an hour on self-care? You’ve changed.
Well I'm certainly a few pounds lighter now
"
Burrito for dinner? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"only need £4
Funny as hell £2
Honest + true £2"
yep.
Although, since I have £1 spare can I also have the beautiful bottom too, please? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"only need £4
Funny as hell £2
Honest + true £2
yep.
Although, since I have £1 spare can I also have the beautiful bottom too, please? "
You surely can. This is a super arse-loving thread. I was expecting more love for norks. |
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Man. Honest and true, kinky, beard.
Women. Kinky, honest, nice bum. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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[Removed by poster at 16/07/23 23:19:05] |
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[Removed by poster at 17/07/23 00:27:36] |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"An hour ago I was full on Chewbacca, more naked mole rat now.
You spent an hour on self-care? You’ve changed.
Well I'm certainly a few pounds lighter now
"
So how much do you cost now?… |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"An hour ago I was full on Chewbacca, more naked mole rat now.
You spent an hour on self-care? You’ve changed.
Well I'm certainly a few pounds lighter now
So how much do you cost now?… "
You'll find me in the bargain bucket. |
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"You'll find me in the bargain bucket. "
Now I’m craving KFC. At breakfast time. Thanks.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You'll find me in the bargain bucket.
Now I’m craving KFC. At breakfast time. Thanks. "
Finger licking good |
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"Finger licking good "
Is *everybody* perving about fingers this morning? (Or is it just the women I’ve spoken to?) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Finger licking good
Is *everybody* perving about fingers this morning? (Or is it just the women I’ve spoken to?)"
I'm talking about chicken, no idea what you're on about  |
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By *archelCouple
over a year ago
A field somewhere |
OP, have you seen these parts on wish? I'd gladly pay a lot more to make sure they were quality. |
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"I'm talking about chicken, no idea what you're on about "
Thank fuck for that. Thought you were on trend for a minute. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"OP, have you seen these parts on wish? I'd gladly pay a lot more to make sure they were quality."
Well these are Fab FAF prices, the high end options are for my private customers wink wink nudge nudge |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Liverpool |
How about I give you £10 and see what you come up with |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"How about I give you £10 and see what you come up with"
Now there's an offer! |
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Honest + true
Thick thighs
Bottom
I'll keep the change |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Honest + true
Thick thighs
Bottom
I'll keep the change "
Buy some condoms |
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Funny as hell £2
Honest + true £2
Thick thighs £1
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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago
west midlands |
Funny as hell £2
Thick thighs £1
Beautiful bottom £1
Beard bro £1
Beard is optional.
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Honest and true £2
Kinky £2
You can save the extra £1 and let someone else have it |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Honest and true £2
Kinky £2
You can save the extra £1 and let someone else have it "
There's quite a fund building up |
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"Honest and true £2
Kinky £2
You can save the extra £1 and let someone else have it "
I was greedy and overspent! I wanted an enormous cock aswell as honest and true and funny as hell. Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Honest and true £2
Kinky £2
You can save the extra £1 and let someone else have it "
I’ll have it!
Honest and true £2
Kinky £2
Thick thighs £1
Beautiful bottom £1 |
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Money well spent.
Fabulous face
Funny as fuck. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nice norks
Give the rest to the Big Issue man |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Nice norks
Give the rest to the Big Issue man "
Wot, no bum? |
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By *im494Man
over a year ago
Westhill |
Funny as hell
Nice norks
Thick thighs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Funny
Honest
Good bum
K x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I kept going overbudget, they always tell you not to shop when your hungry , Anyway finally sorted it
1. Funny as hell
2. Nice norks
3. Nice bum
Is there a buy one get one free offer? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I kept going overbudget, they always tell you not to shop when your hungry , Anyway finally sorted it
1. Funny as hell
2. Nice norks
3. Nice bum
Is there a buy one get one free offer?"
Yea of course - you do get both norks |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Shop closing soon - get your requests in now! |
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Funny as hell
Honest and True
Natty Dresser |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Funny as hell
Honest and true (with me at least...)
Bum
It's the winning combination. |
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Actually .... keep him. I can't afford what I really want.
I wanted Funny, Honest, Einstein and I was one pound short.
So fuck the first one. I'm not really arsed if he's in haute or primark if he's funny ,honest and intelligent |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Actually .... keep him. I can't afford what I really want.
I wanted Funny, Honest, Einstein and I was one pound short.
So fuck the first one. I'm not really arsed if he's in haute or primark if he's funny ,honest and intelligent"
If he's intelligent he might figure out how to dress well |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Actually .... keep him. I can't afford what I really want.
I wanted Funny, Honest, Einstein and I was one pound short.
So fuck the first one. I'm not really arsed if he's in haute or primark if he's funny ,honest and intelligent
If he's intelligent he might figure out how to dress well "
I find most clothes look the same once they in a crumpled heap at the end of the bed...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Actually .... keep him. I can't afford what I really want.
I wanted Funny, Honest, Einstein and I was one pound short.
So fuck the first one. I'm not really arsed if he's in haute or primark if he's funny ,honest and intelligent
If he's intelligent he might figure out how to dress well
I find most clothes look the same once they in a crumpled heap at the end of the bed...
"
Mebbe, but it's the way you wear them beforehand... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Easy
Gym fit £2
Ginormous cock £2
Beautiful bottom £1 |
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Funny
Honest
Bum
However I seem to have gone massively over budget with Mrs Misfit who has all things I want in addition to those stated above.
Mr |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Funny
Honest
Bum
However I seem to have gone massively over budget with Mrs Misfit who has all things I want in addition to those stated above.
Mr"
She must have been an investment buy |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I'd really love |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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To have one thread |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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That gets to 175! |
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