FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Are you realistic with who you message?
Are you realistic with who you message?
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By *Liam OP Man
over a year ago
Midlands |
I know men get alot of stick on here for not reading profiles and things. I totally see why, usually I just ignore messages from the male sex but today I opened one off a 60 year old man... like what am I supposed to want from an old man?
I did ask him that and he suggested I changed my attitude 
Anyway it got me thinking, as someone who doesn't really go looking into the fab wilderness for profiles to message. Are you realistic with who you message? Or are you just an impulse messager?
Do you message people who you know are way different to you, or are 300 miles away?
Or I'll say it, out your league. Yes leagues do exist in peoples heads |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I mostly just message people on the forums, nothing in it really. Just some bants about the topic etc
But I don't really message folk outside the forums, can't be arsed with the graft  |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Liverpool |
Similar to Drama. It's mostly forum based now. I mean I've messaged every other profile and had zero luck. So stick with the freaks of the forum.
I'll message anyone that I feel I want or need to (filters standing of course). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Of course I'm realistic.
Nothing is out of reach, nothing is insurmountable.
Sure some profiles have thousands upon thousands of messages, sit on hot pics regularly and attract all the attention.
I've broken through that noise plenty of times.
Will do again.
It's. Easy.
But then, I am the cockiest shit known to man. |
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Putting aside Fab friends and forumites, I've only sent three messages in the last two years. Any chats/engagements have been on the back of women messaging me, the majority of whom are hundreds of miles away.
With distance comes better quality; the nearer to London the worse they get. I have no idea why.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm very selective about who I message now. At the moment there's plenty of guys who are most definitely my type but I just haven't the energy or the time so I don't message.
Distance doesn't really come into for me either, I'm all for the looks and personality.
I'm generally off forum guys though, I think sometimes people just want to meet me so they can get the verification. Some make it bleeding obvious!!
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By *eyeYCouple
over a year ago
Nr Leicester |
Message folk we feel we'd get on with and potentially off too.. Age is irrelevant. Albeit in the case described if you not looking for guys we'd suggest he's the one who should readjust..  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes there is no leagues on fab and most things are realistic for me there definitely is"
Nope there’s definitely not I can tell you that for shour
As anyone who thinks that isn’t worth my time to begin with |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've never messaged any man first in order to chat them up or at least attempt it.
Ones that I message are usually people I've already met at socials, so i already know them to message them first.
Just don't bother otherwise |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like the women who message me and I message back. We have great banter. Very complimentary of each other and generally have a good bit of humour together. There's others who've messaged me direct reply from a forum and they've again been very complimentary towards me, and I've reciprocated.
I don't think manners cost anything. Just because I reply and we have good "banter" some sexual it doesn't mean I'm going turn up on your door step flowers and cock in hand.
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By *Liam OP Man
over a year ago
Midlands |
"Yes there is no leagues on fab and most things are realistic for me there definitely is
Nope there’s definitely not I can tell you that for shour
As anyone who thinks that isn’t worth my time to begin with "
they might not want your time though |
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Rarely send the first message, if we both like a profile we will wink and if they respond then we will message. We always read the whole profile, they wrote it for is to read at the end of the day.
Luna |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes there is no leagues on fab and most things are realistic for me there definitely is
Nope there’s definitely not I can tell you that for shour
As anyone who thinks that isn’t worth my time to begin with they might not want your time though"
Than that’s they loose not mine I know my worth I know what I bring to the table I am not a simp that can picked up and dropped like others there is no wasnt in to you them but am now type deal with me as I know my worth and I am worth more than that toxic bs |
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By *Liam OP Man
over a year ago
Midlands |
"So why did you open his message and reply?"
good question, I replied to say that what was the point in messaging me.
If you message someone you're going out there to get a reply. So you can't moan if the reply isn't what you've wanted. It's not like you've messaged them first to say no |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've no idea who would or wouldn't fancy me anymore to be honest so the very few messages I send out are to people that I really like the look of and I match their 'looking for' regardless of if I think they're out of my league or whatever. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So why did you open his message and reply? good question, I replied to say that what was the point in messaging me.
If you message someone you're going out there to get a reply. So you can't moan if the reply isn't what you've wanted. It's not like you've messaged them first to say no"
Yet you ignore males usually but decided to open one from someone you have no interest in at all just to ask him what would you want with an old man then come here and do this post?
Why? |
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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago
Redhill |
I don’t message, no. And I get lots of messages from people who aren’t realistic. I tell them I am happy to chat (if I’m bored) but I won’t meet them in person. They ask why, I say “because I’m not attracted to you” Then the abuse and being called a timewaster begins. |
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"Similar to Drama. It's mostly forum based now. I mean I've messaged every other profile and had zero luck. So stick with the freaks of the forum.
I'll message anyone that I feel I want or need to (filters standing of course)."
Every other profile except one ( ) |
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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago
west midlands |
I chat with people who live miles away, we know we are probably never going to meet because of the distance but it doesn't bother me as I like chatting to them. I will msg someone if something on their profile catches my eye, I like chatting to people doesn't always mean we are going to meet. |
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"I will msg someone if something on their profile catches my eye, I like chatting to people doesn't always mean we are going to meet."
In my case it rarely means a meet. I just find people interesting or intriguing.
I like to give compliments to womenn, couples and men as well. But once sent, I never check back...that way madness lies.
It's like a busy bar and you see some one wearing great shoes and you remark on it.
You don't wait outside expecting a blowie as a result do you ?  |
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I've never been a machine gunner.
I've always preferred to operate as a sniper, choosing carefully before taking aim and allowing for windage and elevation which has more often than not had a successful outcome.
I haven't done any of that, not even once, since January 2020 and it has had zero effect on my engagement here.
Every conversation in 3½ years has been started by others.
Some of those have been tank drivers expecting me to surrender or be run over.
Some have whipped out their blunderbuss and hit everything within a 100 yard radius except what my profile shows I am looking for.
A few have had better aim.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be fair to you OP you do have a age range set on your profile. He is above that, so he was chancing his luck! "
Above the age AND the wrong sex
I don't message as I'm not looking. But I'm realistic, so I wouldn't contact anyone. |
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I think we're realistic in that we only message those we think we might be a good fit for.
If we're too old /too far away or they're after bi Fems specifically,we wouldn't get in touch.
I think it would just be wasting our own time tbh if we did .
Miss |
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"I'm very selective about who I message now. At the moment there's plenty of guys who are most definitely my type but I just haven't the energy or the time so I don't message.
Distance doesn't really come into for me either, I'm all for the looks and personality.
I'm generally off forum guys though, I think sometimes people just want to meet me so they can get the verification. Some make it bleeding obvious!!
"
FAV?? Fancy a verification? Fuck optional xx |
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Im realistic- i will message anyone i like that meets my criteria- if they say no it’s obvious to me that their profile is missing the phrase - ‘ I don’t want the best fuck of my entire life!!’ So I move on!!  |
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"Im realistic- i will message anyone i like that meets my criteria- if they say no it’s obvious to me that their profile is missing the phrase - ‘ I don’t want the best fuck of my entire life!!’ So I move on!! "
Smooth talking bastard |
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"I know men get alot of stick on here for not reading profiles and things. I totally see why, usually I just ignore messages from the male sex but today I opened one off a 60 year old man... like what am I supposed to want from an old man?
I did ask him that and he suggested I changed my attitude
Anyway it got me thinking, as someone who doesn't really go looking into the fab wilderness for profiles to message. Are you realistic with who you message? Or are you just an impulse messager?
Do you message people who you know are way different to you, or are 300 miles away?
Or I'll say it, out your league. Yes leagues do exist in peoples heads"
Maybe same as u would want from an old lady?? X |
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By *Liam OP Man
over a year ago
Midlands |
"So why did you open his message and reply? good question, I replied to say that what was the point in messaging me.
If you message someone you're going out there to get a reply. So you can't moan if the reply isn't what you've wanted. It's not like you've messaged them first to say no
Yet you ignore males usually but decided to open one from someone you have no interest in at all just to ask him what would you want with an old man then come here and do this post?
Why?"
the question i'm asking is to do with that message. Anything else you want to get off your chest? |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
Pfft.
I message people, but mainly just for conversation, because they're way, way out of my league.
I've been pleasantly surprised a couple of times that they've wanted more though. Is nice when that happens. And a shock |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Pfft.
I message people, but mainly just for conversation, because they're way, way out of my league.
I've been pleasantly surprised a couple of times that they've wanted more though. Is nice when that happens. And a shock "
You told me I was ghastly  I even trimmed my monobrow |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's rare that I send a first message. If I find someone hot then I might fab a photo. Sometimes they will message a thank you and the ball gets rolling that way. If they don't then oh well, they're not interested. |
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Depends. Most times I read the profile and see if we have something in common then message. Other I just reply to some status that made me laugh, or compliment for a pic or video I particularly liked (making it clear that it's just compliments and not a "fuk now plz" request) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So why did you open his message and reply? good question, I replied to say that what was the point in messaging me.
If you message someone you're going out there to get a reply. So you can't moan if the reply isn't what you've wanted. It's not like you've messaged them first to say no
Yet you ignore males usually but decided to open one from someone you have no interest in at all just to ask him what would you want with an old man then come here and do this post?
Why? the question i'm asking is to do with that message. Anything else you want to get off your chest?"
My chest is just fine wee man but ty for asking. You say people cant moan cause they dont get the reply they want. Same applies to threads. I was just curious as to why you had to initially make a bit of a fool of the person when you could just have asked your question without the preamble.
That's all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I message lots of people, depends on my mood who. If someone has an interesting profile, regardless of age and location, I'll drop them a message. I've connected with some people I'll never meet but that's ok. |
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By *rlandoMan
over a year ago
Lincolnshire |
"I know men get alot of stick on here for not reading profiles and things. I totally see why, usually I just ignore messages from the male sex but today I opened one off a 60 year old man... like what am I supposed to want from an old man?
I did ask him that and he suggested I changed my attitude
No choice , puching below my weight
Anyway it got me thinking, as someone who doesn't really go looking into the fab wilderness for profiles to message. Are you realistic with who you message? Or are you just an impulse messager?
Do you message people who you know are way different to you, or are 300 miles away?
Or I'll say it, out your league. Yes leagues do exist in peoples heads"
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I don't believe in leagues, I've dated people that if I thought they existed that I never would have.
Someone will either find you attractive or they won't and if you're too shy or don't think you stand a chance then you will probably miss out.
So basically my answer is no, I just message someone if I want to and see what happens |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I message mostly local to me or the west mids where I spend a fair bit of time also.
Other than that just general chat with those who aren't realistic local meets |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's a social media platform, and some people like being social.
Perhaps I'm not in the set that gets flooded with messages. In fact, I get none.
On that note, I'll get back in my box... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I message guys I like 
Whether they like me, is totally out of my control "
So if we've never had a message from you - you don't like us
(Checks messages just in case) |
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