I have been counselling a good mate who has recently split from his partner of 10 years. Its aone way split he wants to stay in the relationship but she is bored. I am friends with them both but its so difficult to say to him get on with it she aint coming back mate. A broken heart........who would have one? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I got a real bad broken heart due to the death of a child, dont think anything comes close, but hope your mate is feeling better soon xxx  "
I can't even begin to imagine how that feels I wouldnt wish something like that on my worst enemy I'm sorry for you xxx
On topic, it's no good saying things like there's plenty of fish etc because he wont listen, give him time and support it stings but he'll be ok in time xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I got a real bad broken heart due to the death of a child, dont think anything comes close, but hope your mate is feeling better soon xxx
I can't even begin to imagine how that feels I wouldnt wish something like that on my worst enemy I'm sorry for you xxx
On topic, it's no good saying things like there's plenty of fish etc because he wont listen, give him time and support it stings but he'll be ok in time xxx"
Thanks Vanessa x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have been counselling a good mate who has recently split from his partner of 10 years. Its aone way split he wants to stay in the relationship but she is bored. I am friends with them both but its so difficult to say to him get on with it she aint coming back mate. A broken heart........who would have one?"
He has to go through this stage to start healing. Tell him to imagine where he'll be two years from now. All he then has to do is get from now to then intact. It really is just a matter of time. |
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"I have been counselling a good mate who has recently split from his partner of 10 years. Its aone way split he wants to stay in the relationship but she is bored. I am friends with them both but its so difficult to say to him get on with it she aint coming back mate. A broken heart........who would have one?
He has to go through this stage to start healing. Tell him to imagine where he'll be two years from now. All he then has to do is get from now to then intact. It really is just a matter of time."
Yep but he can only see pain at the moment. When I picked him up today he had cry your eyes out by the Streets..................on his i pod!! |
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"I have been counselling a good mate who has recently split from his partner of 10 years. Its aone way split he wants to stay in the relationship but she is bored. I am friends with them both but its so difficult to say to him get on with it she aint coming back mate. A broken heart........who would have one?"
Unfortunately the only healer is TIME..It is a grieving process..nothing like losing a child, gosh my heart and ultimate respect to anyone who survives that...Time will heal..I have been 13 months trying to heal and only now have begun to believe in the concept of love again.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I got a real bad broken heart due to the death of a child, dont think anything comes close, but hope your mate is feeling better soon xxx
I can't even begin to imagine how that feels I wouldnt wish something like that on my worst enemy I'm sorry for you xxx
On topic, it's no good saying things like there's plenty of fish etc because he wont listen, give him time and support it stings but he'll be ok in time xxx"
I agree with all the above..
Times a great healer  .. I lost my Girlfriend of 5 years.. Destroyed me but igot on with it.. Met a girl and was with her 3 months on rebound but now im happy with the girl im with now.. Just give him time and just chat like you normally would..
Will make him feel better knowing the split hasnt changed things between you and him. |
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I can comment on both unfortunately ... suffered the loss of my little boy 10 years ago next month ... and you never get over it, you just learn to live with it I guess ... and just over 2 years ago I discovered that my partner of 20 odd years had been having an affair with one of my best friends ... thankfully they are still together ... I can honestly say it is the best thing that has ever happened to me ... although I didn't think that at the time ... time is a great healer, as are good friends, and the odd bottle or two of red wine ... be not afraid to cry, ask for help or admit that you are feeling weak and alone .... and at the end of the day I strongly believe that everything happens for a reason xxx |
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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago
Over the rainbow, under the bridge |
"I have been counselling a good mate who has recently split from his partner of 10 years. Its aone way split he wants to stay in the relationship but she is bored. I am friends with them both but its so difficult to say to him get on with it she aint coming back mate. A broken heart........who would have one?"
I feel for him. Had a broken heart a number of times. But I am long-enough in the tooth now to know that broken hearts don't stay broken if you don't let them.
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"I have been counselling a good mate who has recently split from his partner of 10 years. Its aone way split he wants to stay in the relationship but she is bored. I am friends with them both but its so difficult to say to him get on with it she aint coming back mate. A broken heart........who would have one?
I feel for him. Had a broken heart a number of times. But I am long-enough in the tooth now to know that broken hearts don't stay broken if you don't let them.
"
I wrote this tonight
It seems I must walk this world alone
For I still dream of her who turned my heart to stone
Constantly I see her in my minds eye
In my sleep I am left to cry.
Lone footsteps in the sand
With no soul to hold my hand
She is always in my mind
Why was she so unkind?
Troubled and twisted turnings
Tormented and helpless yearnings
She was always there without exception
My love my painted reflection
So walk I must
A victim of a broken trust
My heart heavy and broken
My love now a token.
In my life there will be no other
As traces of love I must smother
Forever my love place on loan
It seems I must now walk this world alone.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"He has to go through this stage to start healing. Tell him to imagine where he'll be two years from now. All he then has to do is get from now to then intact. It really is just a matter of time."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It is hard.. even worse when its not mutual... I have one now.. I fear it may never heal... yet people keep telling me it will
Time is a healer.. so they tell me.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is hard.. even worse when its not mutual... I have one now.. I fear it may never heal... yet people keep telling me it will
Time is a healer.. so they tell me.. "
They do heal cali, i know from experience but i dont do the "love" thing anymore and never will.  |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
The opposite of love is not hate - that is still feeling and passion. It's indifference. When you get to indifference about that person then you are healed. Get through the five stages and then forgive yourself.
One day you wake up and their name is not the first thing that pops into your head. At some point you have a whole week like that. |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
Get him a singles profile on here and he will be hip high in sex offers to cheer him up..
His user name needs to be healingHeartpussy4 U or similar.
Good luck to him |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Having a friend is really important to someone in his position but one thing to bear in mind - don't try to cheer him up, it won't work. Someone earlier said to get him to picture where he'll be in two years and (sorry!) that's a great example of what not to do. He probably can't see two weeks ahead, making him feel like the world expects him to bounce back like nothing happened when he doesn't think he can (and he may well be right) will just depress him more.
Just follow his moods, if he's feeling up take advantage of it and do something fun but if he's feeling down, let him be down and be there for him.
That's my tuppence worth, anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh, one other thing people just wouldn't understand when I had my heart broken last year as well. When you feel like your whole world has crashed down afound you you don't actually want it to get better, you don't want to heal. You want to tear yourself apart, possibly to die, and externally you want the world to stop in its tracks as well.
It feels like an insult to the love you still feel, to the values you've built your life on, for the world to carry on like nothing happened. You want to make people understand the severity of what you feel. Even worse, the thought of getting over it yourself. How can your love have meant anything in the first place if you have a future outside it? If you'll just end up moving on and being ok?
Eventually you have to move on, because what the hell else can you do, but it's the last thing you want to think about at the time. I know people who say "you'll be ok" and that crap mean well, but there's honestly nothing worse than being told that.
For myself, the only times I ever thought about ending my own life were times when someone close had tried to tell me I would be fine, it's just one of those things. It felt like I had to prove to people that that wasn't true. |
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"It is hard.. even worse when its not mutual... I have one now.. I fear it may never heal... yet people keep telling me it will
Time is a healer.. so they tell me..
They do heal cali, i know from experience but i dont do the "love" thing anymore and never will. "
I'm certain that's the easiest way just to close your heart off. I certainly wouldn't be feeling like this if I had and worse is when two people fall in love unexpectedly but know deep within their hearts it could never work. Ending something that feels so right despite being wrong is the worst heartbreak I've ever felt and I'm never risking feeling like this again |
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"I got a real bad broken heart due to the death of a child, dont think anything comes close, but hope your mate is feeling better soon xxx "
there is nothing worse than losing a child born or unborn....worst broken heart i have ever felt..xxx |
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