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"Useful" sex/swinging advice
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"Use deep heat as an extra lube ....
Plus make sure you've been handling chilli peppers before fingering, for that extra tingling"
This reminds me of a few years ago a fwb went down on me after he had had chilli sauce on a kebab, he had stubble & boy did my foof tingle..  |
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If you like the look of someone don't get to know them. You'll just discover they are a dickhead.
Just say I'd love to pound that arse.
Don't say 'your' say that. Really drive that objectification home. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
In a club just follow anyone you fancy around waving your knob helicopter stylee, rather than actually talking to them.
Eventually they'll get the hint you want to shag them and will welcome you as an equal and the added bonus is that they'll never know you sound like a cross between Joe Pasquale and Brian Blessed, dependant on how hard your balls are being squeezed.
A |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"All London brothels display a blue lamp.
(sorry, that's an old one from Gérard Hoffnung) "
And many swingers display a fish symbol on the back of their car. If you see one when out on your travels you should approach the drivers window with your cock out.
A |
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"If there is a pineapple around in absolutely any form, they’re 100% definitely swingers and are gagging for anyone to approach them and ask to fk, they’ll always say yes "
Bloody hell ... you just got me barred from Asda  |
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By *ickshawed OP Couple
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
"Be sure to eat several cloves of raw garlic just before you meet. Nothing says consideration more than garlic breath."
Before we went to our last group social we needed to eat. I suggested to my husband kimchi - which is fermented cabbage. He wouldn't let me  |
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By *avinaTVTV/TS
over a year ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
"Be sure to eat several cloves of raw garlic just before you meet. Nothing says consideration more than garlic breath.
Before we went to our last group social we needed to eat. I suggested to my husband kimchi - which is fermented cabbage. He wouldn't let me "
She is SUCH a cute queen! I'd definitely eat her.  |
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"Following a chat with a friend, we've decided that one should eat a dodgy curry the night before anal sex. This will help the flow and add to the sensation 
Anyone else got any "useful" advice?  "
Women - if oysters are such an aphrodisiac, try shoving a couple up your fanny before a meet. Has to work, right?
Men - women like it when you show an interest in their lives. Before a meet, you should rummage through their bins to get to know them. |
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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago
Derry |
"Be sure to eat several cloves of raw garlic just before you meet. Nothing says consideration more than garlic breath.
Before we went to our last group social we needed to eat. I suggested to my husband kimchi - which is fermented cabbage. He wouldn't let me "
I love kimchi, time consuming to make though.
Hold on I just had a thought  |
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By *ickshawed OP Couple
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
"If you meet a Unicorn in a club, put super glue on your hands before greeting her with a hug. She's not going anywhere soon without you "
Brilliant. Actually I feel "how to catch a unicorn" deserves a thread of its own.. |
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