FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > The case against group socials
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"Too much talking, not enough sex." Fair | |||
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"Venues. I need to be sure its the sort of place that 6'+ 'lady' with bloke shoulders and big hands can safely get into and out of " If I can do it so can you | |||
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"Venues. I need to be sure its the sort of place that 6'+ 'lady' with bloke shoulders and big hands can safely get into and out of " I got you covered | |||
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"Venues. I need to be sure its the sort of place that 6'+ 'lady' with bloke shoulders and big hands can safely get into and out of I got you covered " Count me with above. You just show up | |||
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"Venues. I need to be sure its the sort of place that 6'+ 'lady' with bloke shoulders and big hands can safely get into and out of I got you covered " Can't think of a better wingman... Woman... Person. Fuck it. Cant think of a better winger! | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex." . | |||
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"Venues. I need to be sure its the sort of place that 6'+ 'lady' with bloke shoulders and big hands can safely get into and out of " I've got your back Her | |||
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"I've been to a few and have conflicting opinions on them. First one was perfectly fine and most people there were very welcoming but I've been to a couple where the hosts didn't interact with anyone except a core group of friends. The rooms were laid out like a wedding with huge tables taking up most of the floor space which made mingling impossible and the music was unbearable loud and prevented any normal conversation. Others have been in poorly chosen venues that didn't flow at all. Apart from that I've had experiences of people I've never spoken to or met approaching to say they recognised me from my pics in the chatgroup which was strange as I hadn't been in any chatgroup and wouldn't have shared pics even if I had been. I've also had messages prior to events from some saying how much they were looking forward to meeting me on the night but because I was attending with a friend those same people refused to even acknowledge me when I walked up to them and said hello. I know from previous threads that people have spoken about good and bad experiences and I've had both but the games that people play have put me off going to any more." I remember you speaking of those experiences. And I'm sorry you were left with a bad taste. Hop on a plane and try some new ones perhaps? There is a social for everyone I believe. Just need to find your sort of "people" amongst the crowd. | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex." I’ve said this before. | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex. I’ve said this before. " Isn't the clue in a name Social though? | |||
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"Too far from me, so never saw the point in travelling a long distance, to meet people I'm unlikely to meet again " Sometimes I have felt the same! But then some people are worth the travel and that one off hug. Carpe diem. | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex." we tend to lean towards this ... when we go to a club it is for a little chat and a lot of pleasure and pleasuring x Anne & George | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex. I’ve said this before. Isn't the clue in a name Social though? " You would have thought so.... As a regular social attendee it opens up a side of fab that i would not be able to access otherwise. Or meet ppl I would not meet if I left it up to relying on fab one | |||
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"Group Socials are very under rated as a way of meeting new potential sexual partners/ friends... Get chatting, have a laugh and who knows what it will turn into .. Imo it's really not all about let's meet and fuck straight away .. Socials have changed my life completely and if I can do it anyone can " You are doing it very well Grumpy. I think you checked on us several times through the night and we felt looked after and included good luck on Sat . Not that you need it ! | |||
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"Been to one in the past, but now I don't see the point may as well go to a club as you can socialise there." It's basically 2 hours for me in any direction to reach a club, but as much as I hate to agree with you, visiting a club is probably better | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex. I’ve said this before. Isn't the clue in a name Social though? You would have thought so.... As a regular social attendee it opens up a side of fab that i would not be able to access otherwise. Or meet ppl I would not meet if I left it up to relying on fab one " It's a nice non pressuring way to meet others indeed. | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex. I’ve said this before. Isn't the clue in a name Social though? " I wasn’t talking about socials. | |||
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"Sigh. Too far and no-one, but no-one in my normal world knows about Davina. So I'll just watch from the sidelines. " I'm sorry. I hope the time comes when you feel comfortable introducing yourself as Davina in any circumstances. | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex. I’ve said this before. Isn't the clue in a name Social though? I wasn’t talking about socials. " That went over my head then | |||
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"Venues. I need to be sure its the sort of place that 6'+ 'lady' with bloke shoulders and big hands can safely get into and out of " Similar issues, but different Lots of (most) group social venues are not wheelchair accessible and it seems it's very difficult to find wheelchair accessible spaces that are appropriate for the events. I don't want to cause organisers problems so unless it's a social I know to be accessible, I'll probably not bother even asking. I might if I "know" an organiser. But it's really very awkward. | |||
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"I just felt very awkward. " You tried and felt awkward ? | |||
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"Those of you who chose not to go to them - why not ? Or perhaps I should ask - what stopped you from going so far? If it's not a firm NO. Tones" • Personal issues, extraneous to Fab if I'm honest. But, as mentioned in an earlier thread, I've recently started attending and a few darling forumites are walking over the pieces of my broken shell of which I'm coming out of. | |||
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"Don't want all the women fighting over me #brocode" Come come to London one let's see how this brucey online translates into real persona I dare you | |||
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"I've been to a few socials from another site that rhymes with Let Fife. They're always kinda meh and a bit awkward. I just end up having a few beers to talk to people, have an OK time and then head home and never really speak to them again. Would rather just go to a fetish night, sex party or a fab meet." I was looking at those. Sorry you had a meh experience. | |||
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"I've enjoyed the ones I went to and i think the hosts did all they could to help people mix.. I'd love to see the Guest list in advance but understand why they are no longer shared (people being arsey etc) " That creates potentially another sort of issues too - people asking mutual friends to investigate whether you are attending heh. Before my first forum social I had three women messaging me separately to nose about and ask "who am I hoping to meet?" | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex. we tend to lean towards this ... when we go to a club it is for a little chat and a lot of pleasure and pleasuring x Anne & George " This we've read a few socials we're people do games, speed dating etc and can't think of anything we'd enjoy less to be honest! Love meeting new people just not for us x | |||
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"Don't want all the women fighting over me #brocode Come come to London one let's see how this brucey online translates into real persona I dare you" You can say you just wanna touch me ya know? Haha | |||
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"Those of you who chose not to go to them - why not ? Or perhaps I should ask - what stopped you from going so far? If it's not a firm NO. Tones" I am new to all this and have found the socials an absolutely amazing way to meet people. I like clubs too though. I want connections and friends on the scene as well as meets. Also I have never felt as comfortable in social situations as I have at the swingers socials. I totally get why it doesn't appeal to others though. And I imagine some socials are better than others. | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex." Agreed. | |||
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"Don't want all the women fighting over me #brocode" Come out to play player | |||
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"Group Socials are very under rated as a way of meeting new potential sexual partners/ friends... Get chatting, have a laugh and who knows what it will turn into .. Imo it's really not all about let's meet and fuck straight away .. Socials have changed my life completely and if I can do it anyone can " This! Our first meet together as a couple resulted from meeting someone at a social Tinder x | |||
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"Venues. I need to be sure its the sort of place that 6'+ 'lady' with bloke shoulders and big hands can safely get into and out of Similar issues, but different Lots of (most) group social venues are not wheelchair accessible and it seems it's very difficult to find wheelchair accessible spaces that are appropriate for the events. I don't want to cause organisers problems so unless it's a social I know to be accessible, I'll probably not bother even asking. I might if I "know" an organiser. But it's really very awkward. " Same plus I also have little free time. | |||
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"Sigh. Too far and no-one, but no-one in my normal world knows about Davina. So I'll just watch from the sidelines. I'm sorry. I hope the time comes when you feel comfortable introducing yourself as Davina in any circumstances. " | |||
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"There’s the fear of being on the periphery and outside of everyone’s clique. I tend to be ok one on one with people in a social setting but would find it awkward breaking into conversation with established groups. I guess it all depends on the quality of the host, venue and openness of the attendees. I’m not a big fan of cliquey environments tbf. " That's a very good point! It's easy to feel like an outsider to those who have been to multiple of those socials and have gotten to know each other. It's a shame to see and can only wish others can be more open towards new people | |||
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"There’s the fear of being on the periphery and outside of everyone’s clique. I tend to be ok one on one with people in a social setting but would find it awkward breaking into conversation with established groups. I guess it all depends on the quality of the host, venue and openness of the attendees. I’m not a big fan of cliquey environments tbf. That's a very good point! It's easy to feel like an outsider to those who have been to multiple of those socials and have gotten to know each other. It's a shame to see and can only wish others can be more open towards new people " I hear that Joe, but you were at your first social once, and probably felt the same way...but you kept doing them, got involved to get to know ppl | |||
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"Those of you who chose not to go to them - why not ? Or perhaps I should ask - what stopped you from going so far? If it's not a firm NO. Tones" Not a bit interested tbh , l'd rather meet a woman in a quiet , intimate place and chat , get to know each other, the woman also knows you are interested in her and only her at that time , it mightened be everyone's thing but it to me and it's think it's ok | |||
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"I don't like people" Well said loll | |||
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"I can’t argue for the case against group socials OP as I love them But then I’m a social butterfly and love meeting new people. My only issue has been life stuff and living in the arse end of nowhere " Now don't use the word arse, cuz now I have to say can I be in your arse... FA ( Fancy Anal) | |||
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"There’s the fear of being on the periphery and outside of everyone’s clique. I tend to be ok one on one with people in a social setting but would find it awkward breaking into conversation with established groups. I guess it all depends on the quality of the host, venue and openness of the attendees. I’m not a big fan of cliquey environments tbf. That's a very good point! It's easy to feel like an outsider to those who have been to multiple of those socials and have gotten to know each other. It's a shame to see and can only wish others can be more open towards new people I hear that Joe, but you were at your first social once, and probably felt the same way...but you kept doing them, got involved to get to know ppl " That's true, I think with all this on Fab, you won't always get instant results. You need to persevere and tough it out a bit to get what you want out of it | |||
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"I can’t argue for the case against group socials OP as I love them But then I’m a social butterfly and love meeting new people. My only issue has been life stuff and living in the arse end of nowhere Now don't use the word arse, cuz now I have to say can I be in your arse... FA ( Fancy Anal) " You made that one up. But yes | |||
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"I can’t argue for the case against group socials OP as I love them But then I’m a social butterfly and love meeting new people. My only issue has been life stuff and living in the arse end of nowhere Now don't use the word arse, cuz now I have to say can I be in your arse... FA ( Fancy Anal) You made that one up. But yes " I just made it up....it was kinda flowing | |||
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"There’s the fear of being on the periphery and outside of everyone’s clique. I tend to be ok one on one with people in a social setting but would find it awkward breaking into conversation with established groups. I guess it all depends on the quality of the host, venue and openness of the attendees. I’m not a big fan of cliquey environments tbf. That's a very good point! It's easy to feel like an outsider to those who have been to multiple of those socials and have gotten to know each other. It's a shame to see and can only wish others can be more open towards new people I hear that Joe, but you were at your first social once, and probably felt the same way...but you kept doing them, got involved to get to know ppl That's true, I think with all this on Fab, you won't always get instant results. You need to persevere and tough it out a bit to get what you want out of it" Exactly this, I read alot of ppl talking about social anxiety and it being a barrier to socials. Bit aren't willing to challenge it and at least try... | |||
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"I have massive amounts of social anxiety and find the idea of group gatherings generally terrifying. I'm much more of a quiet one on one person when it comes to talking to people. However, I sucked it up and went to the last Lounge social and met some honestly great people properly, and enjoyed the energy of the people around me that I didn't quite manage to talk to directly. I enjoyed it in my weird way, and will have my arse dragged to the next one too " I hope to chat to you more at the next one lovely | |||
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"Group Socials are very under rated as a way of meeting new potential sexual partners/ friends... Get chatting, have a laugh and who knows what it will turn into .. Imo it's really not all about let's meet and fuck straight away .. Socials have changed my life completely and if I can do it anyone can You are doing it very well Grumpy. I think you checked on us several times through the night and we felt looked after and included good luck on Sat . Not that you need it ! " Aww ta | |||
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"I don't like people" Helpful | |||
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"I have massive amounts of social anxiety and find the idea of group gatherings generally terrifying. I'm much more of a quiet one on one person when it comes to talking to people. However, I sucked it up and went to the last Lounge social and met some honestly great people properly, and enjoyed the energy of the people around me that I didn't quite manage to talk to directly. I enjoyed it in my weird way, and will have my arse dragged to the next one too " I actually didn't realize it was you despite you sitting behind me for a good while so I believe you there! | |||
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"I actually didn't realize it was you despite you sitting behind me for a good while so I believe you there! " As soon as I saw you I thought "Hey that's JoeBeans I should say hi" and then promptly returned to my weird recluse thing without acting on it | |||
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"I actually didn't realize it was you despite you sitting behind me for a good while so I believe you there! As soon as I saw you I thought "Hey that's JoeBeans I should say hi" and then promptly returned to my weird recluse thing without acting on it " But I jumped you as you were just trying trying to get back upstairs so I could say how amazing your shoes were | |||
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"I actually didn't realize it was you despite you sitting behind me for a good while so I believe you there! As soon as I saw you I thought "Hey that's JoeBeans I should say hi" and then promptly returned to my weird recluse thing without acting on it " Well at least now I know for next time so I'll come up to you and say Hi first. Don't fight it either! | |||
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"But I jumped you as you were just trying trying to get back upstairs so I could say how amazing your shoes were " That's a good thing. Initiating conversation with someone I don't know is a challenge, having an excuse to happy word vomit about shoes is less of a problem for me, and then once I've spoken to someone a little bit they're not nearly as scary next time. Plus, I like compliments, even if Lycan always rolls his eyes at people feeding my ego | |||
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"I actually didn't realize it was you despite you sitting behind me for a good while so I believe you there! As soon as I saw you I thought "Hey that's JoeBeans I should say hi" and then promptly returned to my weird recluse thing without acting on it But I jumped you as you were just trying trying to get back upstairs so I could say how amazing your shoes were " And to think you were shy regarding Socials a couple of months ago | |||
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"Because they are cattle markets. The men are there to try and find any woman willing to fuck, and spend their time bitching. With the other single men about their lack of success, and the women are there to find that one special man to fuck and I get bored of telling them no. I also have no desire to play verification bingo." Right! | |||
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"Because they are cattle markets. The men are there to try and find any woman willing to fuck, and spend their time bitching. With the other single men about their lack of success, and the women are there to find that one special man to fuck and I get bored of telling them no. I also have no desire to play verification bingo." This is not our experience at all, albeit we've only been to the Manchester social. Twice or three times now. But definitely no cattle market (how rude!) etc. But then again, are you doing the "social" bit right, if you're just looking for someone to fuck? We've fucked precisely no-one off the back of group socials and that's absolutely fine, because we went to socialise. | |||
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"Simply put, crippling anxiety keeps me from attending any. I don’t even go to family functions because I don’t like being in room full of people I barely know. So there’s even less chance of me being in a room full of near strangers. " I understand I think. That's a tough thing to live with as I have suffered myself although not in the same way as yourself. It's okay to do your own thing. It's okay to protect oneself. So to anyone who's had a similar reason for not attending- you don't miss out. You keep yourself steady, no triggers. And that is important self care. I shall get back to this thread tomorrow. X T. | |||
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"Because they are cattle markets. The men are there to try and find any woman willing to fuck, and spend their time bitching. With the other single men about their lack of success, and the women are there to find that one special man to fuck and I get bored of telling them no. I also have no desire to play verification bingo." That really isn't how it works dude .. If that's your opinion to start with then maybe you won't get far | |||
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"But I jumped you as you were just trying trying to get back upstairs so I could say how amazing your shoes were That's a good thing. Initiating conversation with someone I don't know is a challenge, having an excuse to happy word vomit about shoes is less of a problem for me, and then once I've spoken to someone a little bit they're not nearly as scary next time. Plus, I like compliments, even if Lycan always rolls his eyes at people feeding my ego " Pfft what do men know - egos always need feeding when we are in scary circumstances!! | |||
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"Because they are cattle markets. The men are there to try and find any woman willing to fuck, and spend their time bitching. With the other single men about their lack of success, and the women are there to find that one special man to fuck and I get bored of telling them no. I also have no desire to play verification bingo." How many you've attended out of curiosity? | |||
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"I actually didn't realize it was you despite you sitting behind me for a good while so I believe you there! As soon as I saw you I thought "Hey that's JoeBeans I should say hi" and then promptly returned to my weird recluse thing without acting on it But I jumped you as you were just trying trying to get back upstairs so I could say how amazing your shoes were And to think you were shy regarding Socials a couple of months ago " Oh I'm still terrified when I'm walking into the room on my own wondering if I'm going to literally fall flat on my face - but I'm working on not worrying so much | |||
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"Not enough nibbles! " I've had so many lovely cakes at several socials but a picnic social could be an idea too | |||
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"I actually didn't realize it was you despite you sitting behind me for a good while so I believe you there! As soon as I saw you I thought "Hey that's JoeBeans I should say hi" and then promptly returned to my weird recluse thing without acting on it But I jumped you as you were just trying trying to get back upstairs so I could say how amazing your shoes were And to think you were shy regarding Socials a couple of months ago Oh I'm still terrified when I'm walking into the room on my own wondering if I'm going to literally fall flat on my face - but I'm working on not worrying so much" That’s ok if you do. I’ll catch you | |||
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"I have nothing against group socials but I am a massive introvert and would not feel comfortable even in a small crowd . Also there is the issue of who would would want to chat to an 83 yr old guy? " Everyone. Host would introduce you to regulars and made sure you were looked after | |||
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"Because they are cattle markets. The men are there to try and find any woman willing to fuck, and spend their time bitching. With the other single men about their lack of success, and the women are there to find that one special man to fuck and I get bored of telling them no. I also have no desire to play verification bingo. How many you've attended out of curiosity?" This year so far it has been maybe 1 every couple of months. Previous years it eas 1-2 a month maybe more. | |||
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"Because they are cattle markets. The men are there to try and find any woman willing to fuck, and spend their time bitching. With the other single men about their lack of success, and the women are there to find that one special man to fuck and I get bored of telling them no. I also have no desire to play verification bingo." I haven’t found that….usually if there is a guy (or girl) being a creeper it’s very uncommon and they are usually shown the door. If you have been to a social like that then that’s not how it should be and if you haven’t been to one and just making assumptions hopefully one day you will be proved wrong I get super nervous before the group socials….I do force myself to get out of my comfort zone though as the positives are far better than the nerves and worrying and they are a lot of fun. But I can see how daunting they seem to someone who hasn’t been to one! | |||
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"Because they are cattle markets. The men are there to try and find any woman willing to fuck, and spend their time bitching. With the other single men about their lack of success, and the women are there to find that one special man to fuck and I get bored of telling them no. I also have no desire to play verification bingo. How many you've attended out of curiosity? This year so far it has been maybe 1 every couple of months. Previous years it eas 1-2 a month maybe more." Why do you keep going in spite of the views you developed? That's pretty frequent for group socials ! | |||
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"I actually didn't realize it was you despite you sitting behind me for a good while so I believe you there! As soon as I saw you I thought "Hey that's JoeBeans I should say hi" and then promptly returned to my weird recluse thing without acting on it But I jumped you as you were just trying trying to get back upstairs so I could say how amazing your shoes were And to think you were shy regarding Socials a couple of months ago Oh I'm still terrified when I'm walking into the room on my own wondering if I'm going to literally fall flat on my face - but I'm working on not worrying so much" Be like me and just go with the flow .. You now know we are mainly all a friendly bunch | |||
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"Because they are cattle markets. The men are there to try and find any woman willing to fuck, and spend their time bitching. With the other single men about their lack of success, and the women are there to find that one special man to fuck and I get bored of telling them no. I also have no desire to play verification bingo. How many you've attended out of curiosity? This year so far it has been maybe 1 every couple of months. Previous years it eas 1-2 a month maybe more." This isn't my experience of socials, so I have a question for you if there awful in your opinion why do you attend so many?.. Something doesn't kind of ring true as to what your saying here.. What your telling us and showing us do not tally up... | |||
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"Because they are cattle markets. The men are there to try and find any woman willing to fuck, and spend their time bitching. With the other single men about their lack of success, and the women are there to find that one special man to fuck and I get bored of telling them no. I also have no desire to play verification bingo. Not my experience and how judgemental do you come across, and really arrogant tbf. Having to tell all these women no...what a guy.. As single man who does socials, I have never seen anything like this go on. So I'm guessing your living in fantasy land in your own head as to what actually does happen at organised socials " Who's the one invalidating someone else's experience, and you call me arrogant. You do you babe, and I’ll happily do the ones that want me! | |||
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"I would love to go to an Essex/London social but my anxiety would really play havoc on my mind and make out I shouldn’t be there. Eh, is what it is. " Is there anything what could be done to ease that ? | |||
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"Because they are cattle markets. The men are there to try and find any woman willing to fuck, and spend their time bitching. With the other single men about their lack of success, and the women are there to find that one special man to fuck and I get bored of telling them no. I also have no desire to play verification bingo. How many you've attended out of curiosity? This year so far it has been maybe 1 every couple of months. Previous years it eas 1-2 a month maybe more. Why do you keep going in spite of the views you developed? That's pretty frequent for group socials ! " Honestly? A combination of boredom, curiosity and social experimentation. In my experience what helps with socials is the host. Someone who makes sure everyone is introduced is a far cry from someone who arranges socials just to find fuck meat. | |||
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"I would love to go to an Essex/London social but my anxiety would really play havoc on my mind and make out I shouldn’t be there. Eh, is what it is. Is there anything what could be done to ease that ? " Truthfully I don’t think there is, it’s an internal “thing” I need to push past and assert my mind into going and ignore what my anxiety is telling me. It is something I’m working on after suffering with it for 2 years almost. but thank you though. | |||
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"Because they are cattle markets. The men are there to try and find any woman willing to fuck, and spend their time bitching. With the other single men about their lack of success, and the women are there to find that one special man to fuck and I get bored of telling them no. I also have no desire to play verification bingo. Not my experience and how judgemental do you come across, and really arrogant tbf. Having to tell all these women no...what a guy.. As single man who does socials, I have never seen anything like this go on. So I'm guessing your living in fantasy land in your own head as to what actually does happen at organised socials Who's the one invalidating someone else's experience, and you call me arrogant. You do you babe, and I’ll happily do the ones that want me!" As per my second comment...babe... I reiterate what your saying doesn't match up with what your displaying...my question stands, why would you continue to go to socials, if thete so terrible in your experience. | |||
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"I actually didn't realize it was you despite you sitting behind me for a good while so I believe you there! As soon as I saw you I thought "Hey that's JoeBeans I should say hi" and then promptly returned to my weird recluse thing without acting on it But I jumped you as you were just trying trying to get back upstairs so I could say how amazing your shoes were And to think you were shy regarding Socials a couple of months ago Oh I'm still terrified when I'm walking into the room on my own wondering if I'm going to literally fall flat on my face - but I'm working on not worrying so much That’s ok if you do. I’ll catch you " My hero - do I get to kiss you as a thank you | |||
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"Because they are cattle markets. The men are there to try and find any woman willing to fuck, and spend their time bitching. With the other single men about their lack of success, and the women are there to find that one special man to fuck and I get bored of telling them no. I also have no desire to play verification bingo. How many you've attended out of curiosity? This year so far it has been maybe 1 every couple of months. Previous years it eas 1-2 a month maybe more. Why do you keep going in spite of the views you developed? That's pretty frequent for group socials ! Honestly? A combination of boredom, curiosity and social experimentation. In my experience what helps with socials is the host. Someone who makes sure everyone is introduced is a far cry from someone who arranges socials just to find fuck meat." I see. Of course a good host will set the tone for the event but cannot be held responsible for attitude of people in the room. Or their intentions for that matters. I invite you to try new ones - as a matter of social experiment. Just perhaps don't be too harsh after, they do try their best. Can't satisfy everyone after all. May I ask were the socials you attended held at clubs with play after or just pure social gatherings ? Trying to understand why you'd say what you did in the original comment. | |||
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"As per my second comment...babe... I reiterate what your saying doesn't match up with what your displaying...my question stands, why would you continue to go to socials, if thete so terrible in your experience." Theres fuck all on the telly! | |||
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"As per my second comment...babe... I reiterate what your saying doesn't match up with what your displaying...my question stands, why would you continue to go to socials, if thete so terrible in your experience. Theres fuck all on the telly!" And completed porn hub | |||
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"I would love to go to an Essex/London social but my anxiety would really play havoc on my mind and make out I shouldn’t be there. Eh, is what it is. Is there anything what could be done to ease that ? Truthfully I don’t think there is, it’s an internal “thing” I need to push past and assert my mind into going and ignore what my anxiety is telling me. It is something I’m working on after suffering with it for 2 years almost. but thank you though. " You are working on it. That's fantastic. Small steps and all. *hugs* | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex." Broadly this We like chatting to people at Clubs as we are in the mood to play and the venue is awaiting. Meeting in a non play environment feels a bit like speed dating. Nothing against it really, but would so rather do it in a Club where we could satisfy our desires… | |||
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"As per my second comment...babe... I reiterate what your saying doesn't match up with what your displaying...my question stands, why would you continue to go to socials, if thete so terrible in your experience. Theres fuck all on the telly! And completed porn hub " I'm glad that's sorted between you two he did answer same question asked by me somewhere above btw. | |||
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"Distance, and the rest of life! I will make the MLS one day, I will... Mrs TMN x" make it soon. | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex." If I hosted a social I’d play that song that goes ‘a little less conversation’ | |||
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"Those of you who chose not to go to them - why not ? Or perhaps I should ask - what stopped you from going so far? If it's not a firm NO. Tones" Interesting question… Actually… as an OG… they aren’t what they used to be! In that they have become so local everyone now lives in their own little bubbles and doesn’t look outside For example… 1 Saturday night there was a social in Sheffield, a social in Leeds, and a social in Manchester… All basically canablising the same people who could have gone to all 3… if organisers had liaised with each other… which nobody does anymore! I am going to sound old.. but back in the day organisers would absolutely have talked to each other, it was almost like an unofficial code of honour, to get dates so they are more spread out and people from all over the country could organise to make a bloody good weekend of it! Localisation and local chat rooms killed the big classic socials/munches of old | |||
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"I would love to go to an Essex/London social but my anxiety would really play havoc on my mind and make out I shouldn’t be there. Eh, is what it is. Is there anything what could be done to ease that ? Truthfully I don’t think there is, it’s an internal “thing” I need to push past and assert my mind into going and ignore what my anxiety is telling me. It is something I’m working on after suffering with it for 2 years almost. but thank you though. You are working on it. That's fantastic. Small steps and all. *hugs* " *hugs* thank you, that means a lot. | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex. If I hosted a social I’d play that song that goes ‘a little less conversation’ " Would you play it really loudly so no-one could hear each other? | |||
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"As per my second comment...babe... I reiterate what your saying doesn't match up with what your displaying...my question stands, why would you continue to go to socials, if thete so terrible in your experience. Theres fuck all on the telly! And completed porn hub I'm glad that's sorted between you two he did answer same question asked by me somewhere above btw. " All's good, I did see that he answered. But it still doesn't ring true. But then that's only my perception of things, which admitly could be wrong | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex. If I hosted a social I’d play that song that goes ‘a little less conversation’ Would you play it really loudly so no-one could hear each other?" If I hosted a social it would be a silent disco. | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex. If I hosted a social I’d play that song that goes ‘a little less conversation’ " The defence rests your honour | |||
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"I actually didn't realize it was you despite you sitting behind me for a good while so I believe you there! As soon as I saw you I thought "Hey that's JoeBeans I should say hi" and then promptly returned to my weird recluse thing without acting on it But I jumped you as you were just trying trying to get back upstairs so I could say how amazing your shoes were And to think you were shy regarding Socials a couple of months ago Oh I'm still terrified when I'm walking into the room on my own wondering if I'm going to literally fall flat on my face - but I'm working on not worrying so much That’s ok if you do. I’ll catch you My hero - do I get to kiss you as a thank you " It would be rude not to | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex. If I hosted a social I’d play that song that goes ‘a little less conversation’ Would you play it really loudly so no-one could hear each other? If I hosted a social it would be a silent disco. " Shall we communicate with sign language? Or semaphore? | |||
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"A) Never knew about them. B) I’m hopeless with a room full of strangers - introvert Errr .. that’s it. " Some are advertised in Meets section some on Swinging events. Ask away here if you need to know anything. Maybe we can give you some hope! | |||
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"I’ve done a big brave thing and booked myself on my first big social. Sex parties and clubs where I get to be naked and play. Absolutely fine. Social only, where I need to talk to lots of people and interact with lots of strangers. Terrifying. I may still back out. " Good vibes for your first one and hope it all goes smooth! Tell your friends now when you feel confident so they can stop you from talking yourself out? | |||
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"Anxiety, not really comfortable trying to talk to people in a loud, noisy environment (hearing aid user so that's hell for me) and the regular socials have always seemed to be small groups of friends catching up with no interest in chatting to the newbie. Oh, and being denied being put on the guest list for being trans. Yeah, that as well...." That's a lot of challenges to face for one person. I do hope that bringing this up to the table will help all the hosts to consider those challenges such a accessibility issues mentioned by KC and Wheely somewhere on the thread, hearing impairment when the venue has loud music and definitely equal opportunities for all to attend. Thank you for sharing this. That's important. | |||
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"Those of you who chose not to go to them - why not ? Or perhaps I should ask - what stopped you from going so far? If it's not a firm NO. Tones Interesting question… Actually… as an OG… they aren’t what they used to be! In that they have become so local everyone now lives in their own little bubbles and doesn’t look outside For example… 1 Saturday night there was a social in Sheffield, a social in Leeds, and a social in Manchester… All basically canablising the same people who could have gone to all 3… if organisers had liaised with each other… which nobody does anymore! I am going to sound old.. but back in the day organisers would absolutely have talked to each other, it was almost like an unofficial code of honour, to get dates so they are more spread out and people from all over the country could organise to make a bloody good weekend of it! Localisation and local chat rooms killed the big classic socials/munches of old" Glad you brought this up! A decade ago there'd be less. Maybe one or two per year, generally somewhere central(ish) where people would come from far and wide and make it a weekend break. We did such socials in Birmingham, Manchester and at Jaydees. Yes, they were all held in swingers clubs (Xtasia and Cupids were the other two venues) but they were huge forum events that built ip over a couple of months, had guest lists so you'd know who was going, the events didn't require any membership to attend and only nominal (if any) entry fee. They were socials if you wanted to just be social and could (if you chose) include play. Hundreds attended. People booked out entire hotels locally. They were proper parties, rather than just people sitting in a bar chatting and having a drink more two - before many move on to hotels for fun anyway. Yes, some don't like the concept of socials in clubs but like any club visit sex was never guaranteed in any way, shape or form. Having the option to indulge on the premises was just an added bonus. Hell. We even hijacked a vanilla guy from the bar at a Prem Inn at one and took him with us. He's still on Fab some 9 years later! Maybe the multitude of socials now is half the problem? They're no longer as special as they once were and its easy to skip one and just go next month? A | |||
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"I think I would go to one - Manchester was the first one I really intended to go to but timing proved less possible than I'd hoped. But I was still incredibly nervous about the prospect, whereas personal meets, public speaking, all sorts of things that might seem more scary, I'm 100% fine with. " There are couple Manchester ones coming up so another chance is just around the corner. | |||
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"Those of you who chose not to go to them - why not ? Or perhaps I should ask - what stopped you from going so far? If it's not a firm NO. Tones Interesting question… Actually… as an OG… they aren’t what they used to be! In that they have become so local everyone now lives in their own little bubbles and doesn’t look outside For example… 1 Saturday night there was a social in Sheffield, a social in Leeds, and a social in Manchester… All basically canablising the same people who could have gone to all 3… if organisers had liaised with each other… which nobody does anymore! I am going to sound old.. but back in the day organisers would absolutely have talked to each other, it was almost like an unofficial code of honour, to get dates so they are more spread out and people from all over the country could organise to make a bloody good weekend of it! Localisation and local chat rooms killed the big classic socials/munches of old" Do you think maybe with the cost of making a weekend of it, social organisers are aware of it and think they need to complete with other events organisers so that theirs isn't the one people miss if it's a week or two after another social? | |||
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"I have massive amounts of social anxiety and find the idea of group gatherings generally terrifying. I'm much more of a quiet one on one person when it comes to talking to people. However, I sucked it up and went to the last Lounge social and met some honestly great people properly, and enjoyed the energy of the people around me that I didn't quite manage to talk to directly. I enjoyed it in my weird way, and will have my arse dragged to the next one too " Nah. Not weird. We haven't spoken but I like that you said you enjoyed energy of people around you. I think that's what I need too. I don't have to speak to many but I have to leave feeling my social cup was refilled rather than emptied. | |||
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"Those of you who chose not to go to them - why not ? Or perhaps I should ask - what stopped you from going so far? If it's not a firm NO. Tones Interesting question… Actually… as an OG… they aren’t what they used to be! In that they have become so local everyone now lives in their own little bubbles and doesn’t look outside For example… 1 Saturday night there was a social in Sheffield, a social in Leeds, and a social in Manchester… All basically canablising the same people who could have gone to all 3… if organisers had liaised with each other… which nobody does anymore! I am going to sound old.. but back in the day organisers would absolutely have talked to each other, it was almost like an unofficial code of honour, to get dates so they are more spread out and people from all over the country could organise to make a bloody good weekend of it! Localisation and local chat rooms killed the big classic socials/munches of old Glad you brought this up! A decade ago there'd be less. Maybe one or two per year, generally somewhere central(ish) where people would come from far and wide and make it a weekend break. We did such socials in Birmingham, Manchester and at Jaydees. Yes, they were all held in swingers clubs (Xtasia and Cupids were the other two venues) but they were huge forum events that built ip over a couple of months, had guest lists so you'd know who was going, the events didn't require any membership to attend and only nominal (if any) entry fee. They were socials if you wanted to just be social and could (if you chose) include play. Hundreds attended. People booked out entire hotels locally. They were proper parties, rather than just people sitting in a bar chatting and having a drink more two - before many move on to hotels for fun anyway. Yes, some don't like the concept of socials in clubs but like any club visit sex was never guaranteed in any way, shape or form. Having the option to indulge on the premises was just an added bonus. Hell. We even hijacked a vanilla guy from the bar at a Prem Inn at one and took him with us. He's still on Fab some 9 years later! Maybe the multitude of socials now is half the problem? They're no longer as special as they once were and its easy to skip one and just go next month? A" I am going to sound really old.. but I can name the classic munches… 300 people at Glasgow, persuading a Nottingham city centre pub to close for a social on a Saturday night… and so many people came they happily did it 3 years in a row, in Wigan we took over a cricket club, Manchester it was a club in the gay village, Bristol, Bournemouth, Doncaster it was 2 hotels next to each other, York was and Newcastle it was pubs.. Because organers liaised… they were spread… they were a great place to catch up with names and faces from all over the country…. They weren’t linked to clubs, they were a bloody good night out | |||
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"As per my second comment...babe... I reiterate what your saying doesn't match up with what your displaying...my question stands, why would you continue to go to socials, if thete so terrible in your experience. Theres fuck all on the telly! And completed porn hub I'm glad that's sorted between you two he did answer same question asked by me somewhere above btw. " Let me know the next social you are going to, and if I can make it we hide away in a corner and play “social bingo”. | |||
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"As per my second comment...babe... I reiterate what your saying doesn't match up with what your displaying...my question stands, why would you continue to go to socials, if thete so terrible in your experience. Theres fuck all on the telly! And completed porn hub I'm glad that's sorted between you two he did answer same question asked by me somewhere above btw. Let me know the next social you are going to, and if I can make it we hide away in a corner and play “social bingo”." | |||
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"Those of you who chose not to go to them - why not ? Or perhaps I should ask - what stopped you from going so far? If it's not a firm NO. Tones Interesting question… Actually… as an OG… they aren’t what they used to be! In that they have become so local everyone now lives in their own little bubbles and doesn’t look outside For example… 1 Saturday night there was a social in Sheffield, a social in Leeds, and a social in Manchester… All basically canablising the same people who could have gone to all 3… if organisers had liaised with each other… which nobody does anymore! I am going to sound old.. but back in the day organisers would absolutely have talked to each other, it was almost like an unofficial code of honour, to get dates so they are more spread out and people from all over the country could organise to make a bloody good weekend of it! Localisation and local chat rooms killed the big classic socials/munches of old Do you think maybe with the cost of making a weekend of it, social organisers are aware of it and think they need to complete with other events organisers so that theirs isn't the one people miss if it's a week or two after another social?" That’s the thing… it wasn’t competing! It was collaborating! So if the Yorkshire room and the north west room and the midlands room for example were organising social events they would spread them out so as many people could attend… people don’t go outside of their own little rooms anymore Local chat rooms basically killed off the big socials of old…. | |||
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"Anyone wanna shag me?" You'll force to take me out the back of the social event venue | |||
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"Too much talking, not enough sex." Agree | |||
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"I’ve done a big brave thing and booked myself on my first big social. Sex parties and clubs where I get to be naked and play. Absolutely fine. Social only, where I need to talk to lots of people and interact with lots of strangers. Terrifying. I may still back out. " Don’t back out, it’s just daunting thinking about it. I was exactly the same before my first one. I’m so glad I went in the end and have been to more since. All have been great nights and I’ve met some fantastic people | |||
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"You'd all be so attracted to me, that I'd have to beat some of you off with a stick while the others formed an orderly queue to felate me, and it's just unfair for y'all " That's exactly why I don't go anymore. | |||
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"I would be to big a draw. The numbers attending would get out if hand and the security requirements would just be prohibitive " The queue would be like at the Queen's funeral. I'd get in line. | |||
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"You'd all be so attracted to me, that I'd have to beat some of you off with a stick while the others formed an orderly queue to felate me, and it's just unfair for y'all That's exactly why I don't go anymore. " Because you can't suck me off? Aw Babs | |||
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" The queue would be like at the Queen's funeral. I'd get in line." | |||
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"I haven’t chose to not go, I just haven’t had time yet. Can someone organise a Nottingham one please? Been tempted to go to the Manchester one also and catch up and see faces that I chat to regularly on here. Tom" I agree on the Nottingham social (you should do it Tom!! ) We love group socials, but with limited free time we have to decide if our free evenings are social or play, we usually choose social but have been lucky once or twice and got both D. | |||
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" The queue would be like at the Queen's funeral. I'd get in line. " Phil and Holly would be made to join the back of the queue and wait their turn | |||
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"You'd all be so attracted to me, that I'd have to beat some of you off with a stick while the others formed an orderly queue to felate me, and it's just unfair for y'all That's exactly why I don't go anymore. Because you can't suck me off? Aw Babs " Yes! | |||
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"You'd all be so attracted to me, that I'd have to beat some of you off with a stick while the others formed an orderly queue to felate me, and it's just unfair for y'all That's exactly why I don't go anymore. Because you can't suck me off? Aw Babs Yes! " Aw ok you can if you play with my balls and stick a finger bang me at the same time as noshing me off | |||
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"I haven’t chose to not go, I just haven’t had time yet. Can someone organise a Nottingham one please? Been tempted to go to the Manchester one also and catch up and see faces that I chat to regularly on here. Tom I agree on the Nottingham social (you should do it Tom!! ) We love group socials, but with limited free time we have to decide if our free evenings are social or play, we usually choose social but have been lucky once or twice and got both D." I think you two should….. I don’t usually have the time to attend any let alone organise . But I’d make time to go | |||
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"It kind of feels like everyone else knows each other and I'd definitely be Billy no mates sat in their own as I really cannot do small talk. I can't stand being in a group where everyone has someone to talk to except me. It's a really unpleasant feeling. *shrugs* guess I'm just socially awkward. " Snap! | |||
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"It kind of feels like everyone else knows each other and I'd definitely be Billy no mates sat in their own as I really cannot do small talk. I can't stand being in a group where everyone has someone to talk to except me. It's a really unpleasant feeling. *shrugs* guess I'm just socially awkward. " I suppose I'll chime in me too. There's something intimidating about larger groups. Individuals and smaller groups are better. As others mentioned music at a level that makes conversation difficult doesn't help. A terrible memory for names and faces doesn't help. I'll remember things said and events going back decades but not faces. So yeah, I'll sparkle better in smaller groups. | |||
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"I haven’t chose to not go, I just haven’t had time yet. Can someone organise a Nottingham one please? Been tempted to go to the Manchester one also and catch up and see faces that I chat to regularly on here. Tom I agree on the Nottingham social (you should do it Tom!! ) We love group socials, but with limited free time we have to decide if our free evenings are social or play, we usually choose social but have been lucky once or twice and got both D. I think you two should….. I don’t usually have the time to attend any let alone organise . But I’d make time to go " There is a Notts "cake" social and a Derby social | |||
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