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Your thoughts on winking..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't wink others because I assume that if they're inundated with messages, the number of winks are even worse!
I do state in my profile though that if they're interested, to send me a wink so that at least I know interest is there before sending a message so that the effort to send the first message isn't wasted  |
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I appreciate a wink. I look at them from time to time and it's nice to see who is interested without having to receive a message off everyone.
I appreciate that people don't look at theirs sometimes so I don't often send them but I have no problem receiving them. |
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"So.. winks, are they just plain lazy or a polite time saver for all involved? Genuinely curious to hear all thoughts? "
I don’t look at them, OP. And I’m a boy! On fab!! I know, right!!!
It conjures up an image of people at the other end scrolling through profiles and pinging off winks to every dick, dick and dicky.
Send me a message! It doesn’t have to be award winning prose, just something nice and/or funny that will make me think you’re interested in me specifically. |
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"I don't wink others because I assume that if they're inundated with messages, the number of winks are even worse!
I do state in my profile though that if they're interested, to send me a wink so that at least I know interest is there before sending a message so that the effort to send the first message isn't wasted "
That's a very good point, I also admire your approach!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm guessing just like messages it depends on how many winks you get. If you are inundated you won't bother looking at many if any. If your profile is only ever occupied with tumble then you'll check every fabbed photo, wink, last viewed and all of the local updates  |
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"I appreciate a wink. I look at them from time to time and it's nice to see who is interested without having to receive a message off everyone.
I appreciate that people don't look at theirs sometimes so I don't often send them but I have no problem receiving them. "
Good to know, thanks for the input! |
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"So.. winks, are they just plain lazy or a polite time saver for all involved? Genuinely curious to hear all thoughts?
I don’t look at them, OP. And I’m a boy! On fab!! I know, right!!!
It conjures up an image of people at the other end scrolling through profiles and pinging off winks to every dick, dick and dicky.
Send me a message! It doesn’t have to be award winning prose, just something nice and/or funny that will make me think you’re interested in me specifically."
Haha, a both amusing and informative response! Cheers |
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"We like the wink system as in we do it to show interest it's easier then sending pictures etc to just be deleted if we wink & then they wink back we send a message.Lot less rubbish in our inbox. "
So kind of like a filter system? I suppose that would be the potential time saving element  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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They go ignored, sometimes intentionally, but mostly unintentionally
I find it hard to ignore the big yellow message box, but the wink box doesn't stand out and is hidden in the middle of the dashboard
So, I often miss them |
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"I like them, its a nice way of saying im interested and if they wink back its a good ice breaker.
"
I tend to agree, but it seems like most things it's a numbers game. Will a message over a wink increase your odds.. or not?  |
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I do appreciate a wink as it shows they've looked at my profile, then I look into their profile and if I do like the look of it, I wink back and vice versa. Then it gives them the opportunity to message me to which I always reply back to, yes I am one of the few that will actually genuinely reply back if you are for me or not. I don't like to leave people hanging. If they tell me they're not interested in me, I do appreciate the honesty and move on. |
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"I'm guessing just like messages it depends on how many winks you get. If you are inundated you won't bother looking at many if any. If your profile is only ever occupied with tumble then you'll check every fabbed photo, wink, last viewed and all of the local updates "
Yep, I agree very much a numbers game! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We like the wink system as in we do it to show interest it's easier then sending pictures etc to just be deleted if we wink & then they wink back we send a message.Lot less rubbish in our inbox. "
I like the wink system in terms of receiving (but do not send them as assume women ate inundated). I forget to look so it comes as a surprise when I spot one and reply days later, but I do appreciate them. |
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"They go ignored, sometimes intentionally, but mostly unintentionally
I find it hard to ignore the big yellow message box, but the wink box doesn't stand out and is hidden in the middle of the dashboard
So, I often miss them "
I think with most guys your eyes initially dart to the inbox followed by a quick scan of the remaining screen.. nope, nothing to see here folks!  |
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I wink people I like in the hope that they’ll message me. If they wink me back, we’re at stalemate because I won’t message them first (if I wanted to do that, I wouldn’t have winked)
I don’t check my winks though 
Total double standards |
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By *aggonerMan
over a year ago
for a penny |
I think they’re for lazy people. People use them because they expect you to take the initiative because they can’t be arsed to be a little inventive.
I imagine they’re used by someone trawling the profiles and using as little effort as possible to attract attention.
When I have replied to winks I get either a monosyllabic conversation that goes nowhere or, more usually, nothing at all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve currently got 554 new winks…. So no, I don’t look at them That's actually very insightful thanks. How long would it normally take to accumulate such a high number of winks?  "
Ooh erm at a guess I’d say a good 4 weeks since I last looked? |
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"I do appreciate a wink as it shows they've looked at my profile, then I look into their profile and if I do like the look of it, I wink back and vice versa. Then it gives them the opportunity to message me to which I always reply back to, yes I am one of the few that will actually genuinely reply back if you are for me or not. I don't like to leave people hanging. If they tell me they're not interested in me, I do appreciate the honesty and move on. "
High 5 rainbow! Although no one is obligated to respond and I appreciate many can't, it's always appreciated when people politely decline.. well at least it is for me! |
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Depends if people look at them, I get winked and don't realise sometimes but I'll message when I see it if I'm interested.
Some people say don't wink in their bio, if it doesn't say that then wink if you want but it's unlikely to be noticed if they never look |
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"We like the wink system as in we do it to show interest it's easier then sending pictures etc to just be deleted if we wink & then they wink back we send a message.Lot less rubbish in our inbox.
I like the wink system in terms of receiving (but do not send them as assume women ate inundated). I forget to look so it comes as a surprise when I spot one and reply days later, but I do appreciate them."
Ha! Yeah I know the feeling! |
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I genuinely don't think it's for lazy people. As a lone male on here it's seriously difficult to even get a message you've sent read and this can sometimes result in a lack of confidence sending the first message. I've met a few couples that have said they use the wink system when they're looking for single men. I've had some wonderful meets with some wonderful people over the years I've been on and off of here just from sending a simple wink. |
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"I wink people I like in the hope that they’ll message me. If they wink me back, we’re at stalemate because I won’t message them first (if I wanted to do that, I wouldn’t have winked)
I don’t check my winks though
Total double standards "
Haha, I'm sure many have a similar approach! |
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"I think they’re for lazy people. People use them because they expect you to take the initiative because they can’t be arsed to be a little inventive.
I imagine they’re used by someone trawling the profiles and using as little effort as possible to attract attention.
When I have replied to winks I get either a monosyllabic conversation that goes nowhere or, more usually, nothing at all. "
Ok, interesting to hear your experience. Thanks for the input |
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By *mp411Man
over a year ago
chester |
Or perhaps people use wink’s because they can’t handle the constant rejection or their messages not being read/deleted especially if they had spent time composing a fantastic message just for it to be ignored |
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"I’ve currently got 554 new winks…. So no, I don’t look at them That's actually very insightful thanks. How long would it normally take to accumulate such a high number of winks?
Ooh erm at a guess I’d say a good 4 weeks since I last looked?"
Wow, ok.. think I've had 4 this year! Oh well, you have to laugh! |
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"Depends if people look at them, I get winked and don't realise sometimes but I'll message when I see it if I'm interested.
Some people say don't wink in their bio, if it doesn't say that then wink if you want but it's unlikely to be noticed if they never look"
Yep, fair point! |
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By *KloganMan
over a year ago
Ramsbottom |
I’m really not that pretentious about winks.. i might browse a profile I really like, appreciate some lovely photos and fire over a wink as a token of appreciation.. not because I want to sleep with that person but because their profile is ace..
Once you stop caring if your wink is looked at or even acted upon then it’s a better place to be..
I don’t really care if you look at it or not, I sent it and that’s all that really matters to me. Makes me feel warm and fuzzy and that’s a good thing for my soul.
Winks are good.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I love a wink! I tend to send more than I receive! It gives a good indication if someone is interested or not and whether to take things further or not.
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"Or perhaps people use wink’s because they can’t handle the constant rejection or their messages not being read/deleted especially if they had spent time composing a fantastic message just for it to be ignored "
Oh yes, been there a fair few times myself. We just have to remind ourselves of the sheer numbers involved and know not to take it personally. It's why I usually wink first, no response - no need to message - we have all saved some time with our dignity intact! |
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"I genuinely don't think it's for lazy people. As a lone male on here it's seriously difficult to even get a message you've sent read and this can sometimes result in a lack of confidence sending the first message. I've met a few couples that have said they use the wink system when they're looking for single men. I've had some wonderful meets with some wonderful people over the years I've been on and off of here just from sending a simple wink."
Glad the winks have worked for you! |
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"I’m really not that pretentious about winks.. i might browse a profile I really like, appreciate some lovely photos and fire over a wink as a token of appreciation.. not because I want to sleep with that person but because their profile is ace..
Once you stop caring if your wink is looked at or even acted upon then it’s a better place to be..
I don’t really care if you look at it or not, I sent it and that’s all that really matters to me. Makes me feel warm and fuzzy and that’s a good thing for my soul.
Winks are good.. "
. Awesome response! I'm glad they have that effect on you! |
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"If I get a wink and the person has a blank profile it's pretty pointless but if there's a decent profile to look through I see it as an invite to have a look and often do. "
That's reassuring, cheers! |
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It might vary from hetero to bi homo.
I use the wink function like I would using a cruise on gay apps. They work the same way , it hints interest, if the interest is mutual then a message usually follows.
Works for me anyway |
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"We gave up on the wink system a long time ago, in all the years we’ve been on here, can’t ever recall a wink actually leading to anything. "
Well if they haven't worked for you why would you waste your time, rhetorical question! |
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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago
west midlands |
I like winks, I send one back if I like the profile of the person who has sent me one or I'll send a msg, and I send them first if I see a profile I like. I do forget to look at them tho so I usually go through them quickly before bulk deleting. |
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"So.. winks, are they just plain lazy or a polite time saver for all involved? Genuinely curious to here all thoughts?
I'd like to wink at you but it seems I cant"
I take your wink through here sir! Many thanks! |
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"I never look at them, I don't have time to go through half of my actual messages nevermind winks. I am not really sure of the point of them? "
Too many winks, not enough hours right? No it's cool I get it |
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I get the occasional wink, I don’t pay much attention to them because typically if I wink back nothing further happens. I’m not sure if a wink is ever really a serious invitation for more interaction, to be honest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am too lazy to check them.
T and probably too overwhelmed with them to begin! "
Our profile says - no winks, no ad hoc meets, no random friend requests so land has been laid out. If you didn't read it you have no right to be upset about lack of reply.
And yes the admin can be overwhelming so I guess everyone makes some sort of cuts here and there. What kind of - its up to them. You can't spread yourself too thin.
T |
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"It might vary from hetero to bi homo.
I use the wink function like I would using a cruise on gay apps. They work the same way , it hints interest, if the interest is mutual then a message usually follows.
Works for me anyway"
glad it's working for you! |
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"I like winks, I send one back if I like the profile of the person who has sent me one or I'll send a msg, and I send them first if I see a profile I like. I do forget to look at them tho so I usually go through them quickly before bulk deleting."
I like your approach, can't argue with that! |
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"I get the occasional wink, I don’t pay much attention to them because typically if I wink back nothing further happens. I’m not sure if a wink is ever really a serious invitation for more interaction, to be honest."
Thanks for sharing your experience |
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"I am too lazy to check them.
T and probably too overwhelmed with them to begin!
Our profile says - no winks, no ad hoc meets, no random friend requests so land has been laid out. If you didn't read it you have no right to be upset about lack of reply.
And yes the admin can be overwhelming so I guess everyone makes some sort of cuts here and there. What kind of - its up to them. You can't spread yourself too thin.
T"
absolutely, if it's there in writing then there's no need to feel disappointed |
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