FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Is FAT a bad word?
Is FAT a bad word?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
I just described myself as fat to a guy on here and he went to great lengths to tell me that I am not fat and that I look great and what I am is curvy etc etc...
Thing is, I was not degrading myself by saying that. I was saying what I am. I was stating a fact. I wasn't looking for him to tell me that I am not! I love my FAT body. I know I look great!
So question is, is the word fat a purely bad word? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *oo..Woman
over a year ago
Boo's World |
I personally wouldn't use "fat" to describe myself.
I use chunky or chubby curvy.
Too many people use the "fat" word in a horrible way to put others down so I don't like it in general. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
No it’s not. People feel uncomfortable because we’ve almost expressively associated it with bad things. It’s funny men always respond to women calling themselves fat with ‘you’re beautiful’ but like you can be both… 
Anyway, OP, fat isn’t a bad word and it’s nice that you love your body  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"No it’s not. People feel uncomfortable because we’ve almost expressively associated it with bad things. It’s funny men always respond to women calling themselves fat with ‘you’re beautiful’ but like you can be both…
Anyway, OP, fat isn’t a bad word and it’s nice that you love your body "
I do think it can be used in bad/ harmful ways. And maybe always has been like that. But we reclaiming words and shit now these days. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It's at your discretion to describe yourself how you see fit. If the intent is not malicious then it's also at your discretion to accept the same descriptive from someone else - assuming it's given/interpreted without hurtful undertones.
I personally wouldn't use that term because it can potentially cause offence and hurt feelings. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"No it’s not. People feel uncomfortable because we’ve almost expressively associated it with bad things. It’s funny men always respond to women calling themselves fat with ‘you’re beautiful’ but like you can be both…
Anyway, OP, fat isn’t a bad word and it’s nice that you love your body "
Yes exactly this!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
For some it is.
I think you should be able to use your own language to describe your own body without some bloke thinking he knows better. Especially if it was very clear from your tone that you're comfortable in your skin. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"For some it is.
I think you should be able to use your own language to describe your own body without some bloke thinking he knows better. Especially if it was very clear from your tone that you're comfortable in your skin."
Yeah I completely agree with you. And the others who have said about the intent of the word. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I've no issue with using fat, and fat being used, as a descriptor. I'm fat in the same way that I'm blonde.
That changes however if the intent is to cause hurt or to shame. That's unacceptable.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I've no issue with using fat, and fat being used, as a descriptor. I'm fat in the same way that I'm blonde.
That changes however if the intent is to cause hurt or to shame. That's unacceptable.
"
True true true! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I wouldn't ever use that word to describe someone else although I have used it to describe myself.
But is it really surprising that people are offended by the word? I've never once had the word fat directed towards me in a way that was not derogatory.
I do not think the word fat is bad. But I do think we have a long way to go normalising fat and bringing it back to a purely descriptive point. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just described myself as fat to a guy on here and he went to great lengths to tell me that I am not fat and that I look great and what I am is curvy etc etc...
Thing is, I was not degrading myself by saying that. I was saying what I am. I was stating a fact. I wasn't looking for him to tell me that I am not! I love my FAT body. I know I look great!
So question is, is the word fat a purely bad word? "
Personally I see it as a genuine description of myself. Yes I'm curvy, soft, squishy etc...however these things are because I'm fat lol. I don't see it as a bad word, but that's because I now give a lot less fucks about stuff than I used to lol
Mrs |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I just described myself as fat to a guy on here and he went to great lengths to tell me that I am not fat and that I look great and what I am is curvy etc etc...
Thing is, I was not degrading myself by saying that. I was saying what I am. I was stating a fact. I wasn't looking for him to tell me that I am not! I love my FAT body. I know I look great!
So question is, is the word fat a purely bad word? "
No FAT isn't a bad word. YOu think you are fat - he doesn't. Just accept that he doesn't. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Personally I hate the word.
Takes me back to childhood and teenage years where it was used many times to describe me.
Holds many unhappy memories.
All boils down to body confidence I guess and you have an amazing body OP! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The word is subjective. So it could lead to confusion.
If you describe yourself as fat to someone, would you mind them asking how fat?
To me that sounds slightly disrespectful. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Fat is fat. Nothing subjective about it. Everyone knows what is being fat. I don't get the issue and don't see the need to avoid using it. Some people think they can compliment you by telling you untruths. They're just desperate but they they think they're being kind. Odd. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It all depend what context it's used in, in your case, it wasn't used to cause harm, so not a bad word. It's the same with a lot of different words that can describe something, if they can be used factually or in a way to cause hurt then some people will only see that word as a bad one. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Context and intent.
Like everything else really.
Maybe he was pandering OP?
That does happen here, occasionally. "
That is everything that happens here. Compliments from out of nowhere are always with ulterior motive. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
You're right fat is fat. But fat in appearance is subjective.
Some people would say a 5ft4 size 14-16 is fat , some wouldn't.
Of course it's your right to identify as fat.
You just can't expect everyone to agree.
But yeah idle flattery is never a good thing. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You're right fat is fat. But fat in appearance is subjective.
Some people would say a 5ft4 size 14-16 is fat , some wouldn't.
Of course it's your right to identify as fat.
You just can't expect everyone to agree.
But yeah idle flattery is never a good thing."
Ps... what you mentioned is always gonna be fat.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *riel13Woman
over a year ago
Northampton |
I describe myself as fat, all the time... I am... I don't say it because I think I'm ugly, or I'm down on myself and I don't need lying to, to make me feel better about it... I certainly don't want women that aren't fat, insulted to make me being fat ok, either... I also don't want to be fetishised because of it... I am either attractive or I'm not... I don't really care either way, anymore. Being fat is just what I am at the moment, nothing more and that's fine. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You're right fat is fat. But fat in appearance is subjective.
Some people would say a 5ft4 size 14-16 is fat , some wouldn't.
Of course it's your right to identify as fat.
You just can't expect everyone to agree.
But yeah idle flattery is never a good thing.
Ps... what you mentioned is always gonna be fat. "
I think I'll just give this one up |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Context and intent.
Like everything else really.
Maybe he was pandering OP?
That does happen here, occasionally.
That is everything that happens here. Compliments from out of nowhere are always with ulterior motive. "
Listen, sugar tits, that just isn't true.
For the longest of times, I've yearned, dreamt a dream, of your touch.
Always beyond my grasp, betwixt dawn and dusk, drifting between the ephemeral and real.
There are no ulterior motives, only an opportunity, a chance, the gift of the universe aligning in your shadow for the opportunity of your gaze.
To be seen and acknowledged.
Or something like that.
I dunno.
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It completely depends on the intention of the word. Using it as a slur or aiming to cause offence. No real way of being cute about it, but I've heard people use the word fat to describe themselves.
It's kind of like self deprecating humour, you can joke about your own depression but if someone else made a joke about it. May be offensive. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I just described myself as fat to a guy on here and he went to great lengths to tell me that I am not fat and that I look great and what I am is curvy etc etc...
Thing is, I was not degrading myself by saying that. I was saying what I am. I was stating a fact. I wasn't looking for him to tell me that I am not! I love my FAT body. I know I look great!
So question is, is the word fat a purely bad word? "
I’m going to have to say yes fat is an insulting word used to degrade someone to mentally hurt someone but the word curvy is a much better word or even PAWG (Phat Ass White Girl) which interprets someone with a sexy round ass which is sexy |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It's like describing people as skinny or saying someone's a goth chav or ned etc it's a description obviously words can hurt so it's best to be mindful as anyone can be and have the right to be offended by being called anything |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It's the intent behind a word that really counts. If someone happily describes themselves a certain way I feel it's patronising to tell them they're wrong. I often refer to myself as old, nine out of ten times people will say "you're not". Why? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just described myself as fat to a guy on here and he went to great lengths to tell me that I am not fat and that I look great and what I am is curvy etc etc...
Thing is, I was not degrading myself by saying that. I was saying what I am. I was stating a fact. I wasn't looking for him to tell me that I am not! I love my FAT body. I know I look great!
So question is, is the word fat a purely bad word? "
I agree with you fat is not a bad word, I guess it can be used in a derogatory way but it’s not a bad word In my opinion |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It's the intent behind a word that really counts. If someone happily describes themselves a certain way I feel it's patronising to tell them they're wrong. I often refer to myself as old, nine out of ten times people will say "you're not". Why? "
I agree 100 per cent. I think it’s that old and fat are considered negative, demeaning words. Used by you to describe yourself it’s a whole different deal… gorgeous you are… x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I just described myself as fat to a guy on here and he went to great lengths to tell me that I am not fat and that I look great and what I am is curvy etc etc...
Thing is, I was not degrading myself by saying that. I was saying what I am. I was stating a fact. I wasn't looking for him to tell me that I am not! I love my FAT body. I know I look great!
So question is, is the word fat a purely bad word?
Personally I see it as a genuine description of myself. Yes I'm curvy, soft, squishy etc...however these things are because I'm fat lol. I don't see it as a bad word, but that's because I now give a lot less fucks about stuff than I used to lol
Mrs"
Yes, yes, yes! This was my entire point. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I describe myself as fat, all the time... I am... I don't say it because I think I'm ugly, or I'm down on myself and I don't need lying to, to make me feel better about it... I certainly don't want women that aren't fat, insulted to make me being fat ok, either... I also don't want to be fetishised because of it... I am either attractive or I'm not... I don't really care either way, anymore. Being fat is just what I am at the moment, nothing more and that's fine. "
Yes babe! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I’m size 24 and say I’m fat if I start talking to someone, I think because I try to be honest about me and don’t want anyone to think I’m catfishing, and I don’t like to use bbw or extra layers… I think it’s just stating what I am if that makes sense. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It’s a useful description. I am fat. I’m not an activist or anything - but I accept that fact.
If anyone who hasn’t met me says “how can I find you?” I’m very happy to say “I’m the fat bloke in the corner with the blue shirt on”.
I actually find some of the pains people go to in avoiding the word fat on my behalf kind of funny
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"Context is everything.
"I'm a fat cunt" *laughs at self.
"You're a fat cunt!!!!!" *said with disgust.
"You're not fat, you're beautiful!!!!! *wants to get dick wet.
"
"You're not fat, you're just tall" kid trying to not hurt your feelings |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Fat is fat,skinny is skinny!
We all or most wish to be excepted for what we are!
Even in skin colour plus more.
The dilemma in society is just that! Esp on the net. Many trying to tick others boxs of approval which has already set the tone for a massive mental decline and dysfunction! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"When a man says your not fat 99 out of 100 will say anything to get sex,if you describe yourself as fat then your fat..your whatever you want to describe yourself as x"
sales pictch,say anything to seal the deal.
Behaviour in people is very strange,not all words matter look at real actions. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just described myself as fat to a guy on here and he went to great lengths to tell me that I am not fat and that I look great and what I am is curvy etc etc...
Thing is, I was not degrading myself by saying that. I was saying what I am. I was stating a fact. I wasn't looking for him to tell me that I am not! I love my FAT body. I know I look great!
So question is, is the word fat a purely bad word? "
Apart from looks visualy.
Do actions and personality count.
I have obsearved over many years now.
One can or may have good looks yet a wrotten heart and Devlish.
Another not so good looking,but angelic.
Looks are merely a shell and cover on the surface. Look a little deeper the contents and action of people then you see the real them.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Context and intent.
Like everything else really.
Maybe he was pandering OP?
That does happen here, occasionally.
That is everything that happens here. Compliments from out of nowhere are always with ulterior motive. "
 words are words without real actions.
All posted pics of people we really dont and wont know. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"You're not "fat" you have "fat" and that's different. You are a beautiful woman first and always. It's not a bad word, but don't use it as a word to describe yourself.. x"
I have lots of fat on my body which makes me look fat.
The fat (noun) makes me look fat (adjective).
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I am fat.
Dress it up with placatory words if you want to, but I am what I am.
I'm also a lot of other things."
Indeedy.
On paper and on the CV we often write much. But at the interview,or at the Dragon's den dress down. All gets revealed.
I think many are shying away from some real face to face engagements,due to past truama. So the comfort of the keyboard and screen provides just that.
Everything to gain,nothing to lose. Its life! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It's all the ridiculous terms used today that's offensive. Call yourself how you see fit.
I once said that I needed to get in shape and he said
But Rob, round is a shape. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *oggoneMan
over a year ago
Derry |
"I just described myself as fat to a guy on here and he went to great lengths to tell me that I am not fat and that I look great and what I am is curvy etc etc...
Thing is, I was not degrading myself by saying that. I was saying what I am. I was stating a fact. I wasn't looking for him to tell me that I am not! I love my FAT body. I know I look great!
So question is, is the word fat a purely bad word? "
I think over time our use of language changes, for differing reasons. I'd include words like bastard, retard and spastic. Fat is a similar term in that its perceived as derogatory and a gendered slur. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have a reasonable layer of subcutaneous fat. This is a fact.
Boobs are a sack of fat. I  boobs
There's other things in boobs too, but yes. Some boobs have more fat than others also  "
Oh. Womansplain it to us |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I have a reasonable layer of subcutaneous fat. This is a fact.
Boobs are a sack of fat. I boobs
There's other things in boobs too, but yes. Some boobs have more fat than others also
Oh. Womansplain it to us "
I just did |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I just described myself as fat to a guy on here and he went to great lengths to tell me that I am not fat and that I look great and what I am is curvy etc etc...
Thing is, I was not degrading myself by saying that. I was saying what I am. I was stating a fact. I wasn't looking for him to tell me that I am not! I love my FAT body. I know I look great!
So question is, is the word fat a purely bad word? "
There are no bad words just easily offended people |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
