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Sending facepics
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By *bat OP Man
over a year ago
Alicante, Spain. (Sometimes in Wales) |
I’m still nervous about sending out face pics, but if I’ve started to chat to someone, I know it’s quite reasonable to be asked to send one. It’s not like it’s blind date, is it!!
I was asked to send a face pic a couple of days ago and did so, but I couldn’t have ticked their boxes as they’ve opened it and just stopped the conversation there.
I can’t be everyone’s cup of tea and I know that no answer is actually an answer, but I still feel like I’ve been done over a bit.
Personally I’d have said “no thanks” rather than ghost someone.
I don’t need anyone’s sympathy but I’m interested in your views on this.
Cheers!
Gbat
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Same boat. Send a face pic and then the conversation goes dead.
I can only assume I’m too sexy and gorgeous so they assume I’m out of their league so don’t reply.
Alternatively I may invest in a bag to wear on my head. |
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My ugly mug has so far failed to attract any attention at all.
The thing is, there's always "better" on here for women. Fitter, better looking, bigger d*ck, closer, more veris, and so on. If you had a choice of literally thousands, how do you choose?
This place is for novelty purposes only as far as I'm concerned.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I sent mine yesterday as requested by someone and I wasn't their cup of tea. They were polite though and did message to say. But I've had what you describe happen to me.
It's not great but no one owes us anything, you just have to pick yourself back up from the negative and carry on. Not easy sometimes. But you do get used to it.
Some will like and some won't. Just do you. Think of it as a mismatch that wouldn't have worked anyway.
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I don't send them at all unless it's someone I've been chatting to for quite a while and we have agreed to meet.
I've never asked for one in 6 years here.
I don't base any conversation here on physical attraction or presume I'm going to have sex with everyone I chat to so the only need for facepics is so we will recognise each other when we arrive at the social because it will always without fail be a social and nothing more.
I've never been concerned about people rejecting me on the basis of a facepic but I have been sent too many unsolicited pics of other fabbers either directly or through groupchats to have any faith that they will remain between me and the person I've shared them with.
I was told at a group social that someone recognised me from my facepic in the presocial chatgroup.
Strangely enough I wasn't in any chatgroup and wouldn't have shared a pic even if I had been. |
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"I don't send them at all unless it's someone I've been chatting to for quite a while and we have agreed to meet.
I've never asked for one in 6 years here.
I don't base any conversation here on physical attraction or presume I'm going to have sex with everyone I chat to so the only need for facepics is so we will recognise each other when we arrive at the social because it will always without fail be a social and nothing more.
I've never been concerned about people rejecting me on the basis of a facepic but I have been sent too many unsolicited pics of other fabbers either directly or through groupchats to have any faith that they will remain between me and the person I've shared them with.
I was told at a group social that someone recognised me from my facepic in the presocial chatgroup.
Strangely enough I wasn't in any chatgroup and wouldn't have shared a pic even if I had been. "
Just to add though. The very first and last facepic Friday I took part in here in the Lounge I sent a pic to the"lovely" couple running the thread.
Their response was to not reciprocate but to tell me that I would be hotter if I wasn't Irish.
Just one more reason not to share any. |
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By *vilgasamWoman
over a year ago
The dot in the i |
"I don't send them at all unless it's someone I've been chatting to for quite a while and we have agreed to meet.
I've never asked for one in 6 years here.
I don't base any conversation here on physical attraction or presume I'm going to have sex with everyone I chat to so the only need for facepics is so we will recognise each other when we arrive at the social because it will always without fail be a social and nothing more.
I've never been concerned about people rejecting me on the basis of a facepic but I have been sent too many unsolicited pics of other fabbers either directly or through groupchats to have any faith that they will remain between me and the person I've shared them with.
I was told at a group social that someone recognised me from my facepic in the presocial chatgroup.
Strangely enough I wasn't in any chatgroup and wouldn't have shared a pic even if I had been. "
^^^^^ This!
I’m asked almost constantly for it and I refuse to unless I’m comfortable, too many times it’s been shared without my permission so no, I won’t send just because they ask, only if I’m planning to meet, same for my phone number too, not unless I’m planning to meet them in person. Just too too many requests to say yes all the time |
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Nobody's perfect and I know I'm not everyone cup of tea either, in fact I'm one of the ugliest guys on here but if you send a picture and she doesnt like the look of it as much as it might dissapoint you at least you know where you stand and move onto someone else who may like you for you and not what you look like. |
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"Please tell me they don't get shared on here as much as it sounds like they do. "
We've heard the same about people sharing private messages and pics in chat groups, it's made me a little wary.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We do swap if we feel comfortable or if people seem genuine on their profile with recent veris, we do attach them to first messages. Always set it to delete though just to be a bit safer 
Mr |
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Difficult one I've been chatting to a man on another site and we swapped kik sent him aive vid and asked for same which he sent but was totally different to his pics on the site when I checked they were from 2010 so long time and tbh he's not my cup of tea chatted for a while but shall have to say no ty x |
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"My ugly mug has so far failed to attract any attention at all.
The thing is, there's always "better" on here for women. Fitter, better looking, bigger d*ck, closer, more veris, and so on. If you had a choice of literally thousands, how do you choose?
This place is for novelty purposes only as far as I'm concerned.
"
You're most certainly not ugly! |
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I never ask for a face picture and will happily chat until the other person requests one.
Usually for me the exchange of photos occur via the 'back door' method: they offer their phone number or Telegram ID and we 'see' each other via our WhatsApp/Telegram profile photo, or I'll attach a photo into the chat.
Following on from that I can quite easily gauge the interest from the other person through the momentum of chat (or lack thereof) or banality - usually just chatting about the weather or frivolous things. Eventually the chat just dissipates like scattered confetti.
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I can end pretty much any conversation by sending mine, but it’s rude not to and people have to see it at some point! The only other option is paper bag I guess, or mask maybe  xx
I didn’t know sharing a picture was a thing? Naive Nelly here! I’ve not been sent one anyhow, so here’s hoping they aren’t shared to the four corners xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s personal choice, but I’m happy to wait for them to drop a pic… me I’m there to see and don’t feel the need to hide. I’m more protective if my other social media than I am at letting people see my face. |
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"Please tell me they don't get shared on here as much as it sounds like they do. "
I know women who have left chatgroups because of the pics that were being shared.
I have left groups for this reason and don't take part in any groups now as a result.
A well verified and "popular" forumite used to send me facepics and personal details of people especially women I disagreed with in the forums in case I needed additional ammunition. Her words not mine btw.
These were people she had met and verified and the pics were 2 years old at that stage.
When challenged she admitted having screenshots of every conversation she had including all personal details and facepics.
Obviously I don't speak to this person now and can guarantee my details have been passed to others for daring to criticise her. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m very fortunate to have never been told I’m not for them or this to happen. But I do think that if you’ve been chatting already it is polite to say the pic didn’t do it for them. But I think I get why a woman wouldn’t say that- not wanting to see someone upset or possible abuse. Idk it’s complicated I guess. But yeah. Sorry dude |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Please tell me they don't get shared on here as much as it sounds like they do.
I know women who have left chatgroups because of the pics that were being shared.
I have left groups for this reason and don't take part in any groups now as a result.
A well verified and "popular" forumite used to send me facepics and personal details of people especially women I disagreed with in the forums in case I needed additional ammunition. Her words not mine btw.
These were people she had met and verified and the pics were 2 years old at that stage.
When challenged she admitted having screenshots of every conversation she had including all personal details and facepics.
Obviously I don't speak to this person now and can guarantee my details have been passed to others for daring to criticise her."
Forum users so this as well? |
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By *riel13Woman
over a year ago
Northampton |
Also... I won't respond if you look too good to be true... If you are very good looking, to me, I wouldn't believe you actually want to fuck me and you are happy with any hole that belongs to anyone |
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Myself I don't have any problem showing my face on occasion, Marc is more selective though personal and professional reasons and that's his perogative, you'll only see him if he feels totally comfortable with the person we're talking to or if he gives me the ok to show in private.
Tinder x |
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I have mine public in my profile. I'm unusual looking and dress femme with a shaved head. Most people aren't into that androgynous look at all but some are really into it, I'm only interested in meeting those ones. It's a good filter.
There's not many people I'm compatible with on here so if Im up front about how I present myself then I think I have more chance of the right people finding me.
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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago
Calderdale innit |
If I asked for a facepic or we've been chatting for a bit,i'll always reply even if it's a no thanks as its good to let the other person know where they stand.
Any abuse or why not etc & its a block.I agree it must be frustrating op. |
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"Please tell me they don't get shared on here as much as it sounds like they do.
I know women who have left chatgroups because of the pics that were being shared.
I have left groups for this reason and don't take part in any groups now as a result.
A well verified and "popular" forumite used to send me facepics and personal details of people especially women I disagreed with in the forums in case I needed additional ammunition. Her words not mine btw.
These were people she had met and verified and the pics were 2 years old at that stage.
When challenged she admitted having screenshots of every conversation she had including all personal details and facepics.
Obviously I don't speak to this person now and can guarantee my details have been passed to others for daring to criticise her."
This sounds horrendous and can't believe they have not being kicked out of here. What despicable behaviour. |
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"Please tell me they don't get shared on here as much as it sounds like they do.
I know women who have left chatgroups because of the pics that were being shared.
I have left groups for this reason and don't take part in any groups now as a result.
A well verified and "popular" forumite used to send me facepics and personal details of people especially women I disagreed with in the forums in case I needed additional ammunition. Her words not mine btw.
These were people she had met and verified and the pics were 2 years old at that stage.
When challenged she admitted having screenshots of every conversation she had including all personal details and facepics.
Obviously I don't speak to this person now and can guarantee my details have been passed to others for daring to criticise her."
Bloody hell. Grim reading that. |
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"Please tell me they don't get shared on here as much as it sounds like they do.
I know women who have left chatgroups because of the pics that were being shared.
I have left groups for this reason and don't take part in any groups now as a result.
A well verified and "popular" forumite used to send me facepics and personal details of people especially women I disagreed with in the forums in case I needed additional ammunition. Her words not mine btw.
These were people she had met and verified and the pics were 2 years old at that stage.
When challenged she admitted having screenshots of every conversation she had including all personal details and facepics.
Obviously I don't speak to this person now and can guarantee my details have been passed to others for daring to criticise her.
This sounds horrendous and can't believe they have not being kicked out of here. What despicable behaviour. "
They have an audience so why would they be kicked out?
Those who know people that share pics and are happy to enable them are just as guilty.
Some people will read this and say it's fiction while many others will nod in agreement but lots of other people have spoken of their experiences in regard to this.
Some people are no longer on the site due to having their pics shared on social media for all manner of shallow reasons. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have face pics on my profile and I alway include them with messages.
I like to get the physical attraction issue out of the way right at the start.
After all, what's the point in having a prolonged conversation, getting to know someone to the point of conisdering meeting them only to find out that you don't fancy them or they don't fancy you.
Seems like a massive waste of everyones time to me |
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"Please tell me they don't get shared on here as much as it sounds like they do.
I know women who have left chatgroups because of the pics that were being shared.
I have left groups for this reason and don't take part in any groups now as a result.
A well verified and "popular" forumite used to send me facepics and personal details of people especially women I disagreed with in the forums in case I needed additional ammunition. Her words not mine btw.
These were people she had met and verified and the pics were 2 years old at that stage.
When challenged she admitted having screenshots of every conversation she had including all personal details and facepics.
Obviously I don't speak to this person now and can guarantee my details have been passed to others for daring to criticise her.
This sounds horrendous and can't believe they have not being kicked out of here. What despicable behaviour.
They have an audience so why would they be kicked out?
Those who know people that share pics and are happy to enable them are just as guilty.
Some people will read this and say it's fiction while many others will nod in agreement but lots of other people have spoken of their experiences in regard to this.
Some people are no longer on the site due to having their pics shared on social media for all manner of shallow reasons. "
Well, I suppose it only confirms there are some really sad people about which tbh is not that surprising. Most usually thoughcome unstuck at some point and you wouldn't want to associate with them anyway. |
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"Please tell me they don't get shared on here as much as it sounds like they do.
I know women who have left chatgroups because of the pics that were being shared.
I have left groups for this reason and don't take part in any groups now as a result.
A well verified and "popular" forumite used to send me facepics and personal details of people especially women I disagreed with in the forums in case I needed additional ammunition. Her words not mine btw.
These were people she had met and verified and the pics were 2 years old at that stage.
When challenged she admitted having screenshots of every conversation she had including all personal details and facepics.
Obviously I don't speak to this person now and can guarantee my details have been passed to others for daring to criticise her.
This sounds horrendous and can't believe they have not being kicked out of here. What despicable behaviour.
They have an audience so why would they be kicked out?
Those who know people that share pics and are happy to enable them are just as guilty.
Some people will read this and say it's fiction while many others will nod in agreement but lots of other people have spoken of their experiences in regard to this.
Some people are no longer on the site due to having their pics shared on social media for all manner of shallow reasons. "
I know first hand that people also talk about physical appearance, i know that someone asked another person would you meet someone if you knew they had this and that it was wrong for them not to say about it.... just rude in my opinion
Tinder |
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If I want to establish if there’s an immediate attraction to someone… something that might develop into something sexual then I would want to see a face pic. Pure and simple. So those kind of conversations I ask for a pic at the start of a conversation. If there’s no attraction I would tell someone though. Not just ghost.
And everything you share online is in the public domain somewhere. No matter who you’ve sent it to. It’s also likely to be there forever  |
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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago
west midlands |
I've sent face pics before to people I'm chatting to and have never heard back, tbh I prefer it that way I get the msg I'm not for them and thats fine with me I know I'm not everyones cup of tea. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've sent face pics before to people I'm chatting to and have never heard back, tbh I prefer it that way I get the msg I'm not for them and thats fine with me I know I'm not everyones cup of tea."
Hi Daizy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Personally I’d have said “no thanks” rather than ghost someone. "
Just “no thanks” ? Bit harsh isn’t it 
Seriously though, it’s such a difficult thing to let someone down kindly after they’ve taken the plunge to send a face pic through. I never know quite what to say if the attraction isn’t there.
I’m not proud of it but sometimes ghosting is a necessary self protection. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"My ugly mug has so far failed to attract any attention at all.
The thing is, there's always "better" on here for women. Fitter, better looking, bigger d*ck, closer, more veris, and so on. If you had a choice of literally thousands, how do you choose?
This place is for novelty purposes only as far as I'm concerned.
"
No no no. 
Stop being so negative! There's no bigger/better/a.n.other issue when it comes to faces. It's the one factor that is entirely subjective and everyone's idea of attraction is individual.
You can't compare a face to a dick, a physique, a pair of boobs, an arse....anything else. The whole 'bobfoc' concept shows that clearly.
Facial attraction is the one thing you can't determine from someone's preferences displayed on a profile in terms of age, height, body shape, ethnicity, sexuality etc. You just don't know if you're attracted or not til you see it.
And short of sticking a bag over your head, resorting to only playing in darkrooms or gloryholes or using a blindfold on every meet - there's fuck all you can do about it.
A |
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"My ugly mug has so far failed to attract any attention at all.
The thing is, there's always "better" on here for women. Fitter, better looking, bigger d*ck, closer, more veris, and so on. If you had a choice of literally thousands, how do you choose?
This place is for novelty purposes only as far as I'm concerned.
You're most certainly not ugly! "
(Looks in empty inbox)
Must be my personality then. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
Since I have had public face pics my inbox has been decidedly quieter than it was. Which is nice, because it means I don't get my hopes up only to be dashed when they recoil in horror at my mush |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Since I have had public face pics my inbox has been decidedly quieter than it was. Which is nice, because it means I don't get my hopes up only to be dashed when they recoil in horror at my mush"
I don’t believe that for a second, you’ve got an absolutely gorgeous face |
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"Please tell me they don't get shared on here as much as it sounds like they do.
We've heard the same about people sharing private messages and pics in chat groups, it's made me a little wary.
Mrs "
As someone who has been revenge porned in the past, this gives me the absolute fear! |
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I can honestly say I stopped sending face pictures after quite a few blocks followed. It wasn’t doing well for my, already fragile, self confidence.
Main reason I will now only meet people at the clubs or following fab organised social, when we saw each other in real life and somehow clicked. |
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