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By *s.Scarlett-M OP Woman
over a year ago
Land of the Iceni (She/Her) |
You know when people come to you saying they can’t get meets, and you try to help them, encourage them to go to a swinging club, they say they don’t want to go to a club but still can’t get meets, the best way of getting meets is to go to clubs and get to know people. What else can I say here… ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are many here that would never consider a swingers club, myself included (that said, I'm not asking for meet advice either)
Many here are not swingers, they are just chancing their arm at recreational sex
Many do, however, come with the innocent mindset that sex will be free and easy here
Swinging is much misunderstood and it's definition is often bastardised to suit agendas
They don't want your advice, they want you to bend over |
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By *s.Scarlett-M OP Woman
over a year ago
Land of the Iceni (She/Her) |
"There are many here that would never consider a swingers club, myself included (that said, I'm not asking for meet advice either)
Many here are not swingers, they are just chancing their arm at recreational sex
Many do, however, come with the innocent mindset that sex will be free and easy here
Swinging is much misunderstood and it's definition is often bastardised to suit agendas
They don't want your advice, they want you to bend over"
Yes I think you’re right. |
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By *s.Scarlett-M OP Woman
over a year ago
Land of the Iceni (She/Her) |
He was meet verified, but he just didn’t get it, and wanted to only meet women for hook ups. I kept explaining most women - well the women I know including myself go to clubs, and fab is mostly used for people telling others where they will be at the weekend.
He was a tourist chancer. |
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"He was meet verified, but he just didn’t get it, and wanted to only meet women for hook ups. I kept explaining most women - well the women I know including myself go to clubs, and fab is mostly used for people telling others where they will be at the weekend.
He was a tourist chancer. "
Why did you want to help him so badly? |
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Only a fraction of 1 percent of people use the clubs and events.
In my opinion it's best to used Search, messaging and the Meets facility etc. Keep at it, build a profile. You're in the right place.
Clubs, even gatherings, certainly aren't everyone's scene. And fun though they might be, it doesn't necessarily follow that people are more likely to hitch up in them either!
pt |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only a fraction of 1 percent of people use the clubs and events.
In my opinion it's best to used Search, messaging and the Meets facility etc. Keep at it, build a profile. You're in the right place.
Clubs, even gatherings, certainly aren't everyone's scene. And fun though they might be, it doesn't necessarily follow that people are more likely to hitch up in them either!
pt"
It's no wonder that some men think they are guaranteed sex at clubs! 
If you want sex, go to clubs........  |
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I’ve found social events work best, when the mrs and myself had our couples profile, getting meets wasn’t an issue, but when we set up our own individual accounts, i was left behind (which I expected), so we attended more socials together and arranged to play alone afterwards.
It’s difficult to get your personality across in messages on here and as a single guy, you’ve really got to stand out to be noticed. |
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"You know when people come to you saying they can’t get meets, and you try to help them, encourage them to go to a swinging club, they say they don’t want to go to a club but still can’t get meets, the best way of getting meets is to go to clubs and get to know people. What else can I say here… ?"
Not everyone wants to go to clubs. Socials are a great way to meet people face to face and chatting on forums is a great way to engage with folk. Maybe offer some profile advise if needed or meet person for a coffee so you can verify them. I have done this a few times and even taken some photos for a few mens profiles. Clubs are not the only solution and there could be numerous reasons why someone doesn't want to go. |
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By *s.Scarlett-M OP Woman
over a year ago
Land of the Iceni (She/Her) |
"I’ve found social events work best, when the mrs and myself had our couples profile, getting meets wasn’t an issue, but when we set up our own individual accounts, i was left behind (which I expected), so we attended more socials together and arranged to play alone afterwards.
It’s difficult to get your personality across in messages on here and as a single guy, you’ve really got to stand out to be noticed. "
I’ve noticed… some blokes on here are relentless in standing out, posting pics every single day, networking every single day.
it’s hard work for a guy, I simply said to him to go to clubs, network in person, not always about sex either, it’s for a social element too.
He had it in for fab, told me to shut up about fab and did I want to hook up with him or not. I said no. Then he told me to F off.
I’m not on here to hook up with men. If I wanted that I would go to a casual dating site.
|
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"You know when people come to you saying they can’t get meets, and you try to help them, encourage them to go to a swinging club, they say they don’t want to go to a club but still can’t get meets, the best way of getting meets is to go to clubs and get to know people. What else can I say here… ?"
Going to clubs as a single guy, is not the best way of getting to know people, it’s ONE way. Personally, based on my clubs experiences, I would never recommend to a mate, visiting a club to meet women. You meet more single women in your local Wetherspoons, than a swinger club.
Fab has been great for me over the years, and continues to be so. Patience is the key |
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"I’ve found social events work best, when the mrs and myself had our couples profile, getting meets wasn’t an issue, but when we set up our own individual accounts, i was left behind (which I expected), so we attended more socials together and arranged to play alone afterwards.
It’s difficult to get your personality across in messages on here and as a single guy, you’ve really got to stand out to be noticed.
I’ve noticed… some blokes on here are relentless in standing out, posting pics every single day, networking every single day.
it’s hard work for a guy, I simply said to him to go to clubs, network in person, not always about sex either, it’s for a social element too.
He had it in for fab, told me to shut up about fab and did I want to hook up with him or not. I said no. Then he told me to F off.
I’m not on here to hook up with men. If I wanted that I would go to a casual dating site.
"
I see this site more of a social platform now, sure, meeting up can be arranged for those who want it, but i enjoy the social side of swinging more these days, if sex happens then it’s a bonus but I have no expectations on that side of it. |
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"I’ve found social events work best, when the mrs and myself had our couples profile, getting meets wasn’t an issue, but when we set up our own individual accounts, i was left behind (which I expected), so we attended more socials together and arranged to play alone afterwards.
It’s difficult to get your personality across in messages on here and as a single guy, you’ve really got to stand out to be noticed.
I’ve noticed… some blokes on here are relentless in standing out, posting pics every single day, networking every single day.
it’s hard work for a guy, I simply said to him to go to clubs, network in person, not always about sex either, it’s for a social element too.
He had it in for fab, told me to shut up about fab and did I want to hook up with him or not. I said no. Then he told me to F off.
I’m not on here to hook up with men. If I wanted that I would go to a casual dating site.
"
Wow, and he's surprised he couldn't get any meets!! We all dodged a bullet there |
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"You know when people come to you saying they can’t get meets, and you try to help them, encourage them to go to a swinging club, they say they don’t want to go to a club but still can’t get meets, the best way of getting meets is to go to clubs and get to know people. What else can I say here… ?"
Not everyone likes clubs or wants to go to clubs. It is my preference but not everyone will x
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s one way to meet people.
It’s not necessarily the BEST way for some.
Many people manage to meet perfectly well, without ever setting foot in a club. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Clubs certainly aren't the only solution otherwise every one of us here in Ireland - north and south - would be stuffed.
As a couple who mostly meets single guys, our advice would be make your profile the best it can be & keep it current; don't message people like your cock is a scattergun - stick to those who really interest you and whose preferences you match; be patient and persevere (don't hound though); check your expectations - most of us aren't knee deep in cock and fanny every week; and don't put all your eggs in the Fab basket.
Group socials can be great for single guys if approached as a networking tool but they're not for everyone either, and plenty do well without them |
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By *olf and RedCouple
over a year ago
Nr Cardiff or at Chams Darlaston |
"You know when people come to you saying they can’t get meets, and you try to help them, encourage them to go to a swinging club, they say they don’t want to go to a club but still can’t get meets, the best way of getting meets is to go to clubs and get to know people. What else can I say here… ?"
We enjoy clubs, however for single men it’s definitely an expensive option. There’s also often a waiting list to join, so I understand why they might not want to go to one.
Red |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We’ve had that and the next suggestion “I’ll go to a club if I can come with you”
Did that once.
Never again.
Stuck with a very negative man for most of the evening who then got the arse because we didn’t want to play with him |
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By *hav02Man
over a year ago
Glasgow/London |
I would guess the majority of users don't go to clubs.
It's just a lottery though: pick your chances, and eventually a nice person comes along for a banging meet  ..often just a tenner here and there, but eventually win a jackpot! |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"You know when people come to you saying they can’t get meets, and you try to help them, encourage them to go to a swinging club, they say they don’t want to go to a club but still can’t get meets, the best way of getting meets is to go to clubs and get to know people. What else can I say here… ?"
Some guys could be the only man in a room of 100 women and couples all seeking men and they still wouldn't get anywhere.
What many fail to recognise is that people make choices as to who they have sex with and that many are in no rush to make a decision or are willing to change their preferences.
If people (men and women) struggle to interact socially in the real world with the opposite sex then why do they assume it'll be any different either online or in a swingers club?
Clubs are no guarantee. Swingers sites are no guarantee. Real life in the outside world offers the same - no guarantee.
If people join Fab or go to a club thinking they have a better chance of getting laid then they're delusional.
Reality checks are needed. And it's not just single men that need to hive their heads a wobble. Some women and couples share the view that Fab and clubs are going to open the floodgates to them and that those they seek will come running.
They should be so lucky...... 
A |
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"I would guess the majority of users don't go to clubs.
"
They don't, how can they?
It's a fraction of 1% - as in 0.0 fraction.
I never understood the club-first thing here, but at least it's not as loud as it used to be. First time I used this forum it felt that socials used to be in half the (perhaps more-cliquey) posts, really annoying.
People who enjoy them fine, they are just super niche- so they are not going to be the very best advise for using Fab or for meeting (and they are socials anyway most of them, obviously with limited people meeting up again and not everyone into shagging anyway!).
Aside from Fab you get plenty of other dating sites like OKCupid that are more relaxed about relationships and sexuality too. pt |
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How about when you agree to meet someone and they still don’t show up? Then you agree to meet someone else and they too don’t show up? Or cancel last minute? Or have no intention of meeting at all, never have? Or both ? |
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By *nkyCplCouple
over a year ago
Northampton |
"How about when you agree to meet someone and they still don’t show up? Then you agree to meet someone else and they too don’t show up? Or cancel last minute? Or have no intention of meeting at all, never have? Or both ? "
Block and onto the next.  |
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"How about when you agree to meet someone and they still don’t show up? Then you agree to meet someone else and they too don’t show up? Or cancel last minute? Or have no intention of meeting at all, never have? Or both ?
Block and onto the next. "
That’s a given, I’m a blocking champion. Just wanted to give another example, besides clubs of how, even if given an opportunity of a meeting, some still don’t take the chance. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve found social events work best, when the mrs and myself had our couples profile, getting meets wasn’t an issue, but when we set up our own individual accounts, i was left behind (which I expected), so we attended more socials together and arranged to play alone afterwards.
It’s difficult to get your personality across in messages on here and as a single guy, you’ve really got to stand out to be noticed.
I’ve noticed… some blokes on here are relentless in standing out, posting pics every single day, networking every single day.
it’s hard work for a guy, I simply said to him to go to clubs, network in person, not always about sex either, it’s for a social element too.
He had it in for fab, told me to shut up about fab and did I want to hook up with him or not. I said no. Then he told me to F off.
I’m not on here to hook up with men. If I wanted that I would go to a casual dating site.
"
Gosh sounds a right charmer |
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The very least thing I would do would say to someone to go to a club, special if they're not that confident
I would suggest putting in some work on their profile and pictures and really think about the kind of message they are sending.
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"The very least thing I would do would say to someone to go to a club, special if they're not that confident
I would suggest putting in some work on their profile and pictures and really think about the kind of message they are sending.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You know when people come to you saying they can’t get meets, and you try to help them, encourage them to go to a swinging club, they say they don’t want to go to a club but still can’t get meets, the best way of getting meets is to go to clubs and get to know people. What else can I say here… ?"
The girl has a point. |
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"You know when people come to you saying they can’t get meets, and you try to help them, encourage them to go to a swinging club, they say they don’t want to go to a club but still can’t get meets, the best way of getting meets is to go to clubs and get to know people. What else can I say here… ?"
You are so right clubs are the easiest places to socialise & more if you want. |
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"You know when people come to you saying they can’t get meets, and you try to help them, encourage them to go to a swinging club, they say they don’t want to go to a club but still can’t get meets, the best way of getting meets is to go to clubs and get to know people. What else can I say here… ?
We enjoy clubs, however for single men it’s definitely an expensive option. There’s also often a waiting list to join, so I understand why they might not want to go to one.
Honestly in the long run it is cheaper how many guy can say it's expensive get to stay in a club as in Chameleon from 11am till 3am on a Friday.
Red "
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I've never been to a club and I don't have much interest in going. My friend attended a club and he said most of the people there were men wanking around the place and the couple of women who were there were not his type.. he was sorry for going. Plus said it was dirty and filthy and not in a good way either. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are many here that would never consider a swingers club, myself included (that said, I'm not asking for meet advice either)
Many here are not swingers, they are just chancing their arm at recreational sex
Many do, however, come with the innocent mindset that sex will be free and easy here
Swinging is much misunderstood and it's definition is often bastardised to suit agendas
They don't want your advice, they want you to bend over"
Harsh but true, many singles lack personality but want to get laid which will be not so easy in real world, besides that of they can't atleast they can wank over pics  |
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By *TG3Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"You know when people come to you saying they can’t get meets, and you try to help them, encourage them to go to a swinging club, they say they don’t want to go to a club but still can’t get meets, the best way of getting meets is to go to clubs and get to know people. What else can I say here… ?"
You've said it you can't help those who can't help themselves  |
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I don't believe for a second that the people who are advocating clubs and events really want even half of Fab to descend on them.
How would that even work?
The woman just needs better (ie different and less conclusive) advice, not a rather snotty thread on her imo. If she doesn't want to go to a club, you write it off the list, not call her the proverbial horse  pt |
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By *hav02Man
over a year ago
Glasgow/London |
"You know when people come to you saying they can’t get meets, and you try to help them, encourage them to go to a swinging club, they say they don’t want to go to a club but still can’t get meets, the best way of getting meets is to go to clubs and get to know people. What else can I say here… ?
You are so right clubs are the easiest places to socialise & more if you want."
Not everyone has the social confidence though  but given the chance on a one-to-one..... |
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"The very least thing I would do would say to someone to go to a club, special if they're not that confident
I would suggest putting in some work on their profile and pictures and really think about the kind of message they are sending.
"
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Amen!!! 
