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The aches and pains of aging

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

So I recently turned 26 (don’t forget to adjust your lower age limits accordingly ) and have found that I can’t drink as much as I once could and feel fine the next day!

What have you gorgeous people learned about yourselves only SINCE YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY?

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By *hinstrapMan  over a year ago

Barnsley

When you get older you make more sex noises to do more standard things.....walkingnup stairs. Standing up.

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

get off my lawn. whippersnapper

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I turned 26 at Christmas and I have figured out I really struggle getting up off the floor. My knees, my back, even my hands and wrists ache.

Welcome to mid 20s

F

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By *ocksareoffMan  over a year ago

Out n About

Kneeling on the floor is not a good idea and don't get me started on bending over.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"When you get older you make more sex noises to do more standard things.....walkingnup stairs. Standing up. "

I can’t wait for this one too get me

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"get off my lawn. whippersnapper"

Get a new line, grandma

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By *elix SightedMan  over a year ago

Cloud 8


"So I recently turned 26 (don’t forget to adjust your lower age limits accordingly ) and have found that I can’t drink as much as I once could and feel fine the next day!

What have you gorgeous people learned about yourselves only SINCE YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY?

"

Ageing? Jeez, come back to me when you hit 46 and then we’ll talk! At 26 I could fallen out of a plane after drinking three buckets of vodka and still gone for a run after a full day at work (including three wanks at lunchtime).

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I turned 26 at Christmas and I have figured out I really struggle getting up off the floor. My knees, my back, even my hands and wrists ache.

Welcome to mid 20s

F"

Aww cute- AGEMATES

Oh this one! Sometimes when I’m playing with my daughter and I’m sitting down I just accept that I’m not getting up for a very long time!

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"get off my lawn. whippersnapper

Get a new line, grandma "

You young people, rejecting what's tried and true. Someday you'll appreciate consistency and the youth will take it away from you

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By *ocksareoffMan  over a year ago

Out n About

When you need to Google or use urban dictionary to understand the new lingo

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By *uyForeLadiesMan  over a year ago

Grantham

Just wait until you get to your fifties.

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"When you need to Google or use urban dictionary to understand the new lingo "

Why don't you kids speak ENGLISH

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Kneeling on the floor is not a good idea and don't get me started on bending over. "

Kneeling. God I don’t want to lose that ability

Stay strong bro

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

You can keep up with the kneeling with practice.

There are fun ways to do this

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"So I recently turned 26 (don’t forget to adjust your lower age limits accordingly ) and have found that I can’t drink as much as I once could and feel fine the next day!

What have you gorgeous people learned about yourselves only SINCE YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY?

Ageing? Jeez, come back to me when you hit 46 and then we’ll talk! At 26 I could fallen out of a plane after drinking three buckets of vodka and still gone for a run after a full day at work (including three wanks at lunchtime). "

3 wanks at lunchtime is so impressive . Repeater?

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By *wist my nipplesCouple  over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

Too many cups of tea make me constipated, due to the caffeine. Now that's middle age biting you in the arse right there

Mrs TMN x

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"get off my lawn. whippersnapper

Get a new line, grandma

You young people, rejecting what's tried and true. Someday you'll appreciate consistency and the youth will take it away from you "

I’ll always be cool. It’s gift and a curse.

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By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.

That, apparently, to younger men I'm an older woman now. I'm now in that category.

An older woman. Me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"When you need to Google or use urban dictionary to understand the new lingo "

I hear this! What the hell does leng mean

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I have discovered a small animated picture to represent my feelings. I think the kids said it was called a jif? I thought jif was cleaning spray. It gets things cleaned in a jiffy.

Maybe that's why it's called that, because you damn kids never clean your rooms!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Just wait until you get to your fifties. "

I wonder what things I won’t be able to do then? Get it up?

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By *elix SightedMan  over a year ago

Cloud 8


"Too many cups of tea make me constipated, due to the caffeine. Now that's middle age biting you in the arse right there

Mrs TMN x

"

Sexy

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You can keep up with the kneeling with practice.

There are fun ways to do this "

Gym? Or blowjobs? I’m not sure how willing I am to try the gym again

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"You can keep up with the kneeling with practice.

There are fun ways to do this

Gym? Or blowjobs? I’m not sure how willing I am to try the gym again "

Fuck the gym. I meant blowjobs.

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By *ocksareoffMan  over a year ago

Out n About


"I have discovered a small animated picture to represent my feelings. I think the kids said it was called a jif? I thought jif was cleaning spray. It gets things cleaned in a jiffy.

Maybe that's why it's called that, because you damn kids never clean your rooms!"

I remember Jiff, oh and by the way it's Gif

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By *wist my nipplesCouple  over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly


"Too many cups of tea make me constipated, due to the caffeine. Now that's middle age biting you in the arse right there

Mrs TMN x

Sexy "

IKR

(for the oldies, that means I know, right? The punctuation is implied. Cos that's what the kids do.)

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Too many cups of tea make me constipated, due to the caffeine. Now that's middle age biting you in the arse right there

Mrs TMN x

"

I love you . So gross

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I have discovered a small animated picture to represent my feelings. I think the kids said it was called a jif? I thought jif was cleaning spray. It gets things cleaned in a jiffy.

Maybe that's why it's called that, because you damn kids never clean your rooms!

I remember Jiff, oh and by the way it's Gif"

Why do these damn kids lie to me?! confusing an old lady like that. Show some damn respect!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"That, apparently, to younger men I'm an older woman now. I'm now in that category.

An older woman. Me. "

You are WAY too young to be an older woman, Meli. I hope this is the reassurance you needed today

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I have discovered a small animated picture to represent my feelings. I think the kids said it was called a jif? I thought jif was cleaning spray. It gets things cleaned in a jiffy.

Maybe that's why it's called that, because you damn kids never clean your rooms!"

Gif!!

Get out of my thread

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"I have discovered a small animated picture to represent my feelings. I think the kids said it was called a jif? I thought jif was cleaning spray. It gets things cleaned in a jiffy.

Maybe that's why it's called that, because you damn kids never clean your rooms!

Gif!!

Get out of my thread "

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By *ocksareoffMan  over a year ago

Out n About


"I have discovered a small animated picture to represent my feelings. I think the kids said it was called a jif? I thought jif was cleaning spray. It gets things cleaned in a jiffy.

Maybe that's why it's called that, because you damn kids never clean your rooms!

I remember Jiff, oh and by the way it's Gif

Why do these damn kids lie to me?! confusing an old lady like that. Show some damn respect!"

Yes m'am, would you like helping cross the road

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You can keep up with the kneeling with practice.

There are fun ways to do this

Gym? Or blowjobs? I’m not sure how willing I am to try the gym again

Fuck the gym. I meant blowjobs."

Willing to try. Discovered I can take A LOT of a banana.

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By *ukeM8519Man  over a year ago

Sandymount

I’m 36 here’s some stuff I notice about males my age say 36 to 40 in terms of getting old. (I’m lucky to say none apply to me ‘yet’).

Beard going grey on the chin

face fills out

hair greying on the sides

receding hairline

good hairline but going thin on top

wearing sunglasses on head to cover receed

putting on weight

And all of the above can happen in a very short period of time. Like I’ve seen guys go grey and bald within a year. Mostly married guys with young kids who have no time for themselves anymore.

Glad to be single

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By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.


"That, apparently, to younger men I'm an older woman now. I'm now in that category.

An older woman. Me.

You are WAY too young to be an older woman, Meli. I hope this is the reassurance you needed today "

Right? I thought so when I kept getting ID'd last night. One comment from an unnamed young man and reality came crashing down.

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By *stellaWoman  over a year ago

London

I’ve learned that I’m actually increasingly becoming pretty bad at answering messages. I used to be a five minute responder but my old mind wanders now and then I realise I’ve not answered anyone, and am probably coming off very rude.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I’m 36 here’s some stuff I notice about males my age say 36 to 40 in terms of getting old. (I’m lucky to say none apply to me ‘yet’).

Beard going grey on the chin

face fills out

hair greying on the sides

receding hairline

good hairline but going thin on top

wearing sunglasses on head to cover receed

putting on weight

And all of the above can happen in a very short period of time. Like I’ve seen guys go grey and bald within a year. Mostly married guys with young kids who have no time for themselves anymore.

Glad to be single

"

Bald within a year sounds like hell on earth. Real scary hours

I bet the women of fab are glad you’re single too

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By *avexxMan  over a year ago

cheshire

its getting harder to keep in shape

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By *stellaWoman  over a year ago

London


"its getting harder to keep in shape"

Au contraire, my spherical shape is only filling out more and more.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I’ve learned that I’m actually increasingly becoming pretty bad at answering messages. I used to be a five minute responder but my old mind wanders now and then I realise I’ve not answered anyone, and am probably coming off very rude. "

Oh Estella, I hear this

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"That, apparently, to younger men I'm an older woman now. I'm now in that category.

An older woman. Me.

You are WAY too young to be an older woman, Meli. I hope this is the reassurance you needed today

Right? I thought so when I kept getting ID'd last night. One comment from an unnamed young man and reality came crashing down. "

Reality is often disappointing, Meli.

But fr you are WAY too young to be an older woman

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"its getting harder to keep in shape"

I learned that I think not long after my 23rd birthday. You’re lucky you’ve lasted this long

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By *avexxMan  over a year ago

cheshire


"its getting harder to keep in shape

Au contraire, my spherical shape is only filling out more and more. "

,,mine too x

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By *oo..Woman  over a year ago

Boo's World

To never reply to forum threads that always turn bad, bully or accuse others.

The waffling ones

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By *ixed MisterMan  over a year ago

London

I'm A LOT more forgetful, my body hates running on hard surfaces even more than it used and neglecting my core workouts is a recipe for disaster.

Ooo and I'm getting greys that atent just on my balls, which I strangely

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"To never reply to forum threads that always turn bad, bully or accuse others.

The waffling ones "

The forum teaches us many things. Hope you’re not feeling down about it though

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By *stellaWoman  over a year ago

London


"I’ve learned that I’m actually increasingly becoming pretty bad at answering messages. I used to be a five minute responder but my old mind wanders now and then I realise I’ve not answered anyone, and am probably coming off very rude.

Oh Estella, I hear this

"

I needed you to!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'm A LOT more forgetful, my body hates running on hard surfaces even more than it used and neglecting my core workouts is a recipe for disaster.

Ooo and I'm getting greys that atent just on my balls, which I strangely "

Ah! That’s tough. But the greys I love for you! Embrace that shit

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By *andadbodMan  over a year ago

Liverpool

26 am I missing something here, you should be at the peak of fitness, im still springing about at my age, but then again, i cycle, do yoga and martial arts so getting up off the floor is never an issue, if you’re aching when you’re in your mid 20s, you’ll be wheelchair bound before you’re 40

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"26 am I missing something here, you should be at the peak of fitness, im still springing about at my age, but then again, i cycle, do yoga and martial arts so getting up off the floor is never an issue, if you’re aching when you’re in your mid 20s, you’ll be wheelchair bound before you’re 40 "

I’ll have you know I would’ve been a professional [insert sorting profession] if I didn’t get a knee injury

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You can keep up with the kneeling with practice.

There are fun ways to do this

Gym? Or blowjobs? I’m not sure how willing I am to try the gym again

Fuck the gym. I meant blowjobs.

Willing to try. Discovered I can take A LOT of a banana. "

Pics?

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By *tsalwaysthequietonesCouple  over a year ago

Lancs

As i've got older I stopped caring so much about what people think of me and in doing so realised I've got ADHD and everything that stressed me out to the point of exhaustion as a young person started to make sense, i've started to finally accept my quirks and I feel like i've regressed abit, as if i'm living the life I should've lived in my teens if I had known why I had to put so much effort into being normal / like everyone else. However the downside of struggling with anxiety and depression all my life has taken its toll on my body, to sum up I look like i've had a bloody hard paper round and i'm only 34 .

The skin under my eyes is like wrinkly ballbag skin without the pubes it's not a good look.

Plus when I do a sneeze it feels like my ribs are going to pop open, it wrecks.

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By *ubbyandHisHotwifeCouple  over a year ago

Glasgowish

I was 40 start of April

was on a night out last night and part way through took painkillers cause my hip & back were hurting from dancing ha ha ha

rock n roll

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You can keep up with the kneeling with practice.

There are fun ways to do this

Gym? Or blowjobs? I’m not sure how willing I am to try the gym again

Fuck the gym. I meant blowjobs.

Willing to try. Discovered I can take A LOT of a banana.

Pics?"

If you want to know if I can take yours why don’t you just fuck my and find out?

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By *hrista BellendWoman  over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Oh bloody hell you whippersnapper

I now need Tena. As sneezing with stoopid hayfever, counteracts my previously adequate, pelvic floor capability....

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"As i've got older I stopped caring so much about what people think of me and in doing so realised I've got ADHD and everything that stressed me out to the point of exhaustion as a young person started to make sense, i've started to finally accept my quirks and I feel like i've regressed abit, as if i'm living the life I should've lived in my teens if I had known why I had to put so much effort into being normal / like everyone else. However the downside of struggling with anxiety and depression all my life has taken its toll on my body, to sum up I look like i've had a bloody hard paper round and i'm only 34 .

The skin under my eyes is like wrinkly ballbag skin without the pubes it's not a good look.

Plus when I do a sneeze it feels like my ribs are going to pop open, it wrecks. "

You gorgeous person. Thanks for sharing this. Some relatable bits in here. But self love and acceptance is so beautiful. Reading this did make me happy that you’ve learned so much about yourself

The sneezing thing is also hilarious and sad for you

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I was 40 start of April

was on a night out last night and part way through took painkillers cause my hip & back were hurting from dancing ha ha ha

rock n roll "

This is hilarious!

Like I genuinely laughed out loud at this

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Oh bloody hell you whippersnapper

I now need Tena. As sneezing with stoopid hayfever, counteracts my previously adequate, pelvic floor capability...."

I thought I couldn’t love you more but this is brilliant

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Youth is wasted on the young!

I've learnt I just have to look at food to put on weight.

More than one glass of wine and I'm knackered for about a week.

My grey hairs are like gremlins and seem to multiply over night.

Nose hair.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Youth is wasted on the young!

I've learnt I just have to look at food to put on weight.

More than one glass of wine and I'm knackered for about a week.

My grey hairs are like gremlins and seem to multiply over night.

Nose hair.

"

YOU

Ah yes- nose hair!

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By *ocksareoffMan  over a year ago

Out n About

Nose and ear hair. Oh yes how could I forget those fu**ers

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Nose and ear hair. Oh yes how could I forget those fu**ers "

Ear hair!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

We got it bad, people.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Oh my knees, my KNEES! Woe is me and woe betide any man hoping to see me on my knees.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Youth is wasted on the young!

I've learnt I just have to look at food to put on weight.

More than one glass of wine and I'm knackered for about a week.

My grey hairs are like gremlins and seem to multiply over night.

Nose hair.

YOU

Ah yes- nose hair!

"

It's good to see you back.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Oh my knees, my KNEES! Woe is me and woe betide any man hoping to see me on my knees. "

That’s rough for you and your fans.

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By *he love catsCouple  over a year ago

South Wales

Hi pickles nice to see you back on the forums.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Youth is wasted on the young!

I've learnt I just have to look at food to put on weight.

More than one glass of wine and I'm knackered for about a week.

My grey hairs are like gremlins and seem to multiply over night.

Nose hair.

YOU

Ah yes- nose hair!

It's good to see you back. "

Who leaves and come back more? Me or you?

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Hi pickles nice to see you back on the forums. "

Looking forward to joining in on your threads

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By *ubbyandHisHotwifeCouple  over a year ago

Glasgowish


"I was 40 start of April

was on a night out last night and part way through took painkillers cause my hip & back were hurting from dancing ha ha ha

rock n roll

This is hilarious!

Like I genuinely laughed out loud at this "

hubby just rubbed my sore feet honestly i’m too old for this shit

I prefer the kinda dancing done in a bed while i’m on my back & pinned down lol

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By *ris GrayMan  over a year ago

Dorchester

You wait till you're in your fifties now thats aching

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm fucking 60 this year and let me tell you about niggling pains ,baaaaaaddd back

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I turned 26 at Christmas and I have figured out I really struggle getting up off the floor. My knees, my back, even my hands and wrists ache.

Welcome to mid 20s

F"

Wrists? I always knew you were a bit of a wanker

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

Soooo 26.

Since my last birthday which was sixty flaming six I have learned that even though you have a free bus pass public transport is not all it's cracked up to be.

26! :Walks off muttering:

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I was 40 start of April

was on a night out last night and part way through took painkillers cause my hip & back were hurting from dancing ha ha ha

rock n roll

This is hilarious!

Like I genuinely laughed out loud at this

hubby just rubbed my sore feet honestly i’m too old for this shit

I prefer the kinda dancing done in a bed while i’m on my back & pinned down lol "

that kinda might still require painkillers at some age.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You wait till you're in your fifties now thats aching "

I hear it all aches in your fifties

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'm fucking 60 this year and let me tell you about niggling pains ,baaaaaaddd back"
i think I’m very scared of back pain

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West

Where do I start?! I use a wheelchair, FFS

Yeah, I fell apart at age 31

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Soooo 26.

Since my last birthday which was sixty flaming six I have learned that even though you have a free bus pass public transport is not all it's cracked up to be.

26! :Walks off muttering:"

You should use the bus pass in London to visit your friend Steve

26! I know. Another year closer to getting in your DMs

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

Where do I start?! I use a wheelchair, FFS

Yeah, I fell apart at age 31 "

Go on go on! Since your last Birthday tell me something

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"

Where do I start?! I use a wheelchair, FFS

Yeah, I fell apart at age 31

Go on go on! Since your last Birthday tell me something "

Since my last birthday, I spent 2.5wks in hospital and have started a medically induced menopause. I'm on my third menopause since January because they keep fucking up the dates

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

Where do I start?! I use a wheelchair, FFS

Yeah, I fell apart at age 31

Go on go on! Since your last Birthday tell me something

Since my last birthday, I spent 2.5wks in hospital and have started a medically induced menopause. I'm on my third menopause since January because they keep fucking up the dates "

I’m sorry mrs KC.

And the nose hairs? How are they?

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"Soooo 26.

Since my last birthday which was sixty flaming six I have learned that even though you have a free bus pass public transport is not all it's cracked up to be.

26! :Walks off muttering:

You should use the bus pass in London to visit your friend Steve

26! I know. Another year closer to getting in your DMs "

It would take a month to make the journey to London by bus and that's if the darn things turn up!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Soooo 26.

Since my last birthday which was sixty flaming six I have learned that even though you have a free bus pass public transport is not all it's cracked up to be.

26! :Walks off muttering:

You should use the bus pass in London to visit your friend Steve

26! I know. Another year closer to getting in your DMs

It would take a month to make the journey to London by bus and that's if the darn things turn up! "

I bet you miss the days off stage coach! So much more reliable

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"

Where do I start?! I use a wheelchair, FFS

Yeah, I fell apart at age 31

Go on go on! Since your last Birthday tell me something

Since my last birthday, I spent 2.5wks in hospital and have started a medically induced menopause. I'm on my third menopause since January because they keep fucking up the dates

I’m sorry mrs KC.

And the nose hairs? How are they? "

I don't have any, you cheeky thing

We are debating whether the very light coloured hair was grey or blonde

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By *ris GrayMan  over a year ago

Dorchester


"You wait till you're in your fifties now thats aching

I hear it all aches in your fifties "

especially if you have time off work and go back to it omg

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman  over a year ago

little house on the praire

I'm 58 and since my last birthday I've been diagnosed with osteoporosis. I have had extra bannisters put on my stairs, a bed guard to help me in and out of bed. A step to help me in and out the shower and a fucking bath lift but I hate that so it's coming out. I have only 50% use in one arm since a shoulder accident. I think that's it. Two dodgy hips and a bad back

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have discovered a small animated picture to represent my feelings. I think the kids said it was called a jif? I thought jif was cleaning spray. It gets things cleaned in a jiffy.

Maybe that's why it's called that, because you damn kids never clean your rooms!"

No that's a GIF quite close to a GILF but don't mistake the two

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Oh my knees, my KNEES! Woe is me and woe betide any man hoping to see me on my knees.

That’s rough for you and your fans. "

It's rough on my KNEES, Pickle!

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By *arcaboy_gaudigirlCouple  over a year ago

Dunfermline

Try being female,50+ and peri menopausal. There are more things wrong with you than right with you. I would list them but I would exceed the maximum characters you can enter.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I’m 52 this year so double your age ….shakes fist at everyone …. Because everything hurts all the time

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"Try being female,50+ and peri menopausal. There are more things wrong with you than right with you. I would list them but I would exceed the maximum characters you can enter. "

I'm 37 and shoved right into the menopause literally overnight

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By *estarossa.Woman  over a year ago

Flagrante

26, you can have sex and travel young man!!!!

Don't get old, a 90 year old told me, when I was half her age, so since I am nearly twice your age, I will tell you the same thing!

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By *rder66Man  over a year ago

Tatooine

I don't grow old, I simply become more bitter.

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By *ansoffateMan  over a year ago

Sagittarius A

My knee is a dickhead

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By *naswingdressWoman  over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Lawn, off, etc.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple  over a year ago

Leeds

I can't open things these days bottle tops on right, I need one of those opener things my grandma used to have.

That and I now say ouch when I get up off the sofa, then there's the grey hairs, the 11's frown lines that make it look like resting bitch face permanently.

Getting older is so much fun.

I'll tell you about the drinking next Sunday, wish me luck!

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm 58 and since my last birthday I've been diagnosed with osteoporosis. I have had extra bannisters put on my stairs, a bed guard to help me in and out of bed. A step to help me in and out the shower and a fucking bath lift but I hate that so it's coming out. I have only 50% use in one arm since a shoulder accident. I think that's it. Two dodgy hips and a bad back"

You were lucky...

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman  over a year ago

little house on the praire


"I'm 58 and since my last birthday I've been diagnosed with osteoporosis. I have had extra bannisters put on my stairs, a bed guard to help me in and out of bed. A step to help me in and out the shower and a fucking bath lift but I hate that so it's coming out. I have only 50% use in one arm since a shoulder accident. I think that's it. Two dodgy hips and a bad back

You were lucky...

"

I am lucky otherwise I wouldn't be able to live independently. I live on my own so there's only me here

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"

Where do I start?! I use a wheelchair, FFS

Yeah, I fell apart at age 31

Go on go on! Since your last Birthday tell me something

Since my last birthday, I spent 2.5wks in hospital and have started a medically induced menopause. I'm on my third menopause since January because they keep fucking up the dates

I’m sorry mrs KC.

And the nose hairs? How are they?

I don't have any, you cheeky thing

We are debating whether the very light coloured hair was grey or blonde "

Probably grey but grey is sexy to me

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You wait till you're in your fifties now thats aching

I hear it all aches in your fifties especially if you have time off work and go back to it omg "

I like your style!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'm 58 and since my last birthday I've been diagnosed with osteoporosis. I have had extra bannisters put on my stairs, a bed guard to help me in and out of bed. A step to help me in and out the shower and a fucking bath lift but I hate that so it's coming out. I have only 50% use in one arm since a shoulder accident. I think that's it. Two dodgy hips and a bad back"

This SUCKS. I am super sorry to hear this. But you’re still here. And I’m sure lots of people are grateful for that. Here’s hoping that next year you only have like a bad toe or something.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Oh my knees, my KNEES! Woe is me and woe betide any man hoping to see me on my knees.

That’s rough for you and your fans.

It's rough on my KNEES, Pickle! "

There was me thinking you liked it rough. I don’t know anything tbh

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By *ools and the brainCouple  over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Nippers

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Try being female,50+ and peri menopausal. There are more things wrong with you than right with you. I would list them but I would exceed the maximum characters you can enter. "

sorry

At the moment it’s just the bad hangovers but I’m only 6 days into being 26 so time for it to get worse maybe?

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By *stellaWoman  over a year ago

London

I’ll tell you something great about aging tho, I’m suddenly of interest to beautiful, young men who are itching to fuck an older woman and quite frankly “don’t mind if I do”.

Although I still love me the older men too and all the other genders. I’m simply greedy.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"

Where do I start?! I use a wheelchair, FFS

Yeah, I fell apart at age 31

Go on go on! Since your last Birthday tell me something

Since my last birthday, I spent 2.5wks in hospital and have started a medically induced menopause. I'm on my third menopause since January because they keep fucking up the dates

I’m sorry mrs KC.

And the nose hairs? How are they?

I don't have any, you cheeky thing

We are debating whether the very light coloured hair was grey or blonde

Probably grey but grey is sexy to me "

Noooooooooo not grey

If you like grey, you'll find Mr KC irresistible

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I’m 52 this year so double your age ….shakes fist at everyone …. Because everything hurts all the time "

I thought when people shake their fists like that it was just because they needed assistance crossing the road or something

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"26, you can have sex and travel young man!!!!

Don't get old, a 90 year old told me, when I was half her age, so since I am nearly twice your age, I will tell you the same thing! "

It’s true. 6 days in and the ol pickle is still magic.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I’ll tell you something great about aging tho, I’m suddenly of interest to beautiful, young men who are itching to fuck an older woman and quite frankly “don’t mind if I do”.

Although I still love me the older men too and all the other genders. I’m simply greedy. "

Itching to fuck an older woman? Well they’re in the right place on fab at least .

Greed is one of the deadly sins I think! Just saying

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I don't grow old, I simply become more bitter. "

is that bitter in taste or…

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"My knee is a dickhead"

Fucking knees man! Does this mean you’re not on them much anymore

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm 58 and since my last birthday I've been diagnosed with osteoporosis. I have had extra bannisters put on my stairs, a bed guard to help me in and out of bed. A step to help me in and out the shower and a fucking bath lift but I hate that so it's coming out. I have only 50% use in one arm since a shoulder accident. I think that's it. Two dodgy hips and a bad back

You were lucky...

I am lucky otherwise I wouldn't be able to live independently. I live on my own so there's only me here"

Sorry it was a Monty Python reference. Not being rude.

https://youtu.be/ue7wM0QC5LE

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I can't open things these days bottle tops on right, I need one of those opener things my grandma used to have.

That and I now say ouch when I get up off the sofa, then there's the grey hairs, the 11's frown lines that make it look like resting bitch face permanently.

Getting older is so much fun.

I'll tell you about the drinking next Sunday, wish me luck!

Mrs "

Blimey, the ouch getting off the sofa got me

I’m secretly hoping your hangover is worse than mine

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By *ools and the brainCouple  over a year ago

couple, us we him her.


"Try being female,50+ and peri menopausal. There are more things wrong with you than right with you. I would list them but I would exceed the maximum characters you can enter.

sorry

At the moment it’s just the bad hangovers but I’m only 6 days into being 26 so time for it to get worse maybe? "

I mean this in the nicest possible way.... fuck off!

Honestly I'd sell my soul to the devil to be 26 again or at least pain free but 40 year's in the building trade will fuck you up this way not to mention hundreds of miles run, thousands on the bike thousands of kilometres swam, hundreds of hours in the gym, same with martial arts.

On top of some heavy drinking and

Seriously ill on more than a couple of occasions, being actually dead for a few minutes and having one seriously fucked up childhood.

Throw in being a parent before 20 and grandparent before 40.

My body is pretty worn out.

Hopefully still have a few good years left.

( He says laying in the bath hardly able to move due to a particularly bad bout of sciatica)

So booooooo moaning about shit at 26 .

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"I'm 58 and since my last birthday I've been diagnosed with osteoporosis. I have had extra bannisters put on my stairs, a bed guard to help me in and out of bed. A step to help me in and out the shower and a fucking bath lift but I hate that so it's coming out. I have only 50% use in one arm since a shoulder accident. I think that's it. Two dodgy hips and a bad back

You were lucky...

I am lucky otherwise I wouldn't be able to live independently. I live on my own so there's only me here

Sorry it was a Monty Python reference. Not being rude.

https://youtu.be/ue7wM0QC5LE

"

It's only a scratch!

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By *andyfloss2000Woman  over a year ago

ashford

Wait till u turn 66! although no! I am quite supple still! X

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm 58 and since my last birthday I've been diagnosed with osteoporosis. I have had extra bannisters put on my stairs, a bed guard to help me in and out of bed. A step to help me in and out the shower and a fucking bath lift but I hate that so it's coming out. I have only 50% use in one arm since a shoulder accident. I think that's it. Two dodgy hips and a bad back

You were lucky...

I am lucky otherwise I wouldn't be able to live independently. I live on my own so there's only me here

Sorry it was a Monty Python reference. Not being rude.

https://youtu.be/ue7wM0QC5LE

It's only a scratch!"

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By *icketysplitsWoman  over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I'm also 58 at my last birthday last month.

I already had osteoporosis, dodgy knees and the struggle to get up off the floor.

The change I've noticed is that I can't do a long lie-in anymore, and I'm bound to fall asleep in front of the telly.

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By *ubal1Man  over a year ago

Newry Down

Since my last birthday-66 last May-when I formally retired, my attitude to my personal health and my exercise regime has been changing fundamentally.

I can now concentrate full time on my fitness; I was laid off from my very last position because I had injured my knee, which rendered me completely immobile for the best part of a year.

That really frightened me-to be unable to walk any distance, and to have to sit all day!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Has anyone told you that you have already peaked sexually and it’s all down hill from here.

In just under 10 years all the woman are going to start coming into their own and then for the next 20 years you will be frantically trying to keep up with their epic sexiness.

You’re welcome.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple  over a year ago

North West


"Since my last birthday-66 last May-when I formally retired, my attitude to my personal health and my exercise regime has been changing fundamentally.

I can now concentrate full time on my fitness; I was laid off from my very last position because I had injured my knee, which rendered me completely immobile for the best part of a year.

That really frightened me-to be unable to walk any distance, and to have to sit all day!"

Sit all day + wheels. It's how I roll and it ain't that bad

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By *929Man  over a year ago

newcastle

Main one since last birthday is smallest two fingers on right hand aching and locking in place briefly every now and again and not being as responsive as the rest

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By *ormalfornorfolkMan  over a year ago

Norwich

My knees have hurt for the last 3 days because I kicked a football with my lad for 10 minutes. Last week it was my hips, before that my forearms which took 6 weeks to recover after doing a ninja warrior monkey bar thing just once. I got up the wall at the end though.

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By *ucka39Man  over a year ago

Newcastle

I've not aged one of my qualities still in my prime at ffffffffifty

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Rigor mortis !

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By *ersiantugMan  over a year ago

Cardiff

You can be unlucky for sure, but in general it's how you look after yourself.

I was a carer throughout my 40's and really fucked my back up. I just carried on after knowing that I damaged it at one point. There's nothing I can do about it now. I have to exercise a lot more, and some days I'm just in pain and can barely bend at all. My thin back doesn't help. Backs in particular seem to have a mind of their own, so outside of painkillers they can be very hard to treat.

Best is always to look after yourself.

--pt

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By *urvytreatWoman  over a year ago

somewhere nice

Well I turned 47 on Friday and finding I’m more achey in the mornings the older I’m getting. My wrists and hands are painful too

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By *itvclaireTV/TS  over a year ago

Birmingham

I'm 48 and definitely wake up with more aches and pains than I did 10 years ago.

XX

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By *agneto.Man  over a year ago

Bham

I've got more bad news Steve, 26 is when your metabolism seems to slow and you have to watch what you eat!

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By *ellhungvweMan  over a year ago

Cheltenham

I know I am slowing down and it takes longer to heal due to age but I have to say I also probably feel the best now I have for a long time.

I do think age is a mental thing as much as anything else. Over the last few years I have started to exercise and eat properly again and a lot of the aches and pains I had in my 30s have gone.

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By *toC Thats MeWoman  over a year ago

Sheffield

STEVE welcome back

Same for me with the drinking, have really cut back on alcohol these days.

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By *ovelifelovefuntimesMan  over a year ago

Where ever I lay my hat

That everytime I get out of a chair I make an involuntary noise

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"So I recently turned 26 (don’t forget to adjust your lower age limits accordingly ) and have found that I can’t drink as much as I once could and feel fine the next day!

What have you gorgeous people learned about yourselves only SINCE YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY?

Ageing? Jeez, come back to me when you hit 46 and then we’ll talk! At 26 I could fallen out of a plane after drinking three buckets of vodka and still gone for a run after a full day at work (including three wanks at lunchtime). "

yes this. I might have stopped for a cat nap whilst standing, but resting my head on a broom though. Could do another 24 hrs then.

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By *ove2pleaseseukMan  over a year ago

Hastings


"So I recently turned 26 (don’t forget to adjust your lower age limits accordingly ) and have found that I can’t drink as much as I once could and feel fine the next day!

What have you gorgeous people learned about yourselves only SINCE YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY?

Ageing? Jeez, come back to me when you hit 46 and then we’ll talk! At 26 I could fallen out of a plane after drinking three buckets of vodka and still gone for a run after a full day at work (including three wanks at lunchtime).

yes this. I might have stopped for a cat nap whilst standing, but resting my head on a broom though. Could do another 24 hrs then. "

Could do that at 40 but now at 55 I do feal much older and finding it harder to stay fit..

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By *avexxMan  over a year ago

cheshire

im fucked but never give in

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"im fucked but never give in"

Same here

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Try being female,50+ and peri menopausal. There are more things wrong with you than right with you. I would list them but I would exceed the maximum characters you can enter.

sorry

At the moment it’s just the bad hangovers but I’m only 6 days into being 26 so time for it to get worse maybe?

I mean this in the nicest possible way.... fuck off!

Honestly I'd sell my soul to the devil to be 26 again or at least pain free but 40 year's in the building trade will fuck you up this way not to mention hundreds of miles run, thousands on the bike thousands of kilometres swam, hundreds of hours in the gym, same with martial arts.

On top of some heavy drinking and

Seriously ill on more than a couple of occasions, being actually dead for a few minutes and having one seriously fucked up childhood.

Throw in being a parent before 20 and grandparent before 40.

My body is pretty worn out.

Hopefully still have a few good years left.

( He says laying in the bath hardly able to move due to a particularly bad bout of sciatica)

So booooooo moaning about shit at 26 .

"

How much do you think your soul is worth because I’m interested

Your best years are yet to come, ya grump

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Wait till u turn 66! although no! I am quite supple still! X"

66 is a long time away. Further away than the years I’ve lived so I can’t even comprehend. But I’m excited to get there. You make it seem fun

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'm also 58 at my last birthday last month.

I already had osteoporosis, dodgy knees and the struggle to get up off the floor.

The change I've noticed is that I can't do a long lie-in anymore, and I'm bound to fall asleep in front of the telly.

"

Have you tried turning the telly up?

It’s truly devastating about no long lay ins. Shit I’m sorry

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Since my last birthday-66 last May-when I formally retired, my attitude to my personal health and my exercise regime has been changing fundamentally.

I can now concentrate full time on my fitness; I was laid off from my very last position because I had injured my knee, which rendered me completely immobile for the best part of a year.

That really frightened me-to be unable to walk any distance, and to have to sit all day!"

Time to focus on you!

Congratulations on your retirement

Is your birthday coming up soon then?! Must be this month obvs

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Has anyone told you that you have already peaked sexually and it’s all down hill from here.

In just under 10 years all the woman are going to start coming into their own and then for the next 20 years you will be frantically trying to keep up with their epic sexiness.

You’re welcome.

"

I’m just enjoying the ones currently in their own. When I can’t get it up anymore I’ll just enjoy something like bird watching or maybe I’ll become a tik toker. Stay tuned

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Main one since last birthday is smallest two fingers on right hand aching and locking in place briefly every now and again and not being as responsive as the rest "

That’s a bit sucky.

I’m sorry pal. But I do hope that after your next birthday you realise something like- you’re awesome

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/05/23 07:34:40]

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"My knees have hurt for the last 3 days because I kicked a football with my lad for 10 minutes. Last week it was my hips, before that my forearms which took 6 weeks to recover after doing a ninja warrior monkey bar thing just once. I got up the wall at the end though.

Hmmm. Longer recovery after exercise. Noted.

But at least you’re doing stuff with your lad still, that’s fucking sick "

**

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We feel more aches every year! I was fine until I hit about 29 and then I started to feel everything.

Hangovers last days on end too

Mr

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I've not aged one of my qualities still in my prime at ffffffffifty "

That’s a long prime. Coming like Lebron James

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"We feel more aches every year! I was fine until I hit about 29 and then I started to feel everything.

Hangovers last days on end too

Mr"

The fucking hangovers man

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Rigor mortis ! "

I love Rick and Morty!

Though I’ve not watched it in ages because I can’t find my glasses

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You can be unlucky for sure, but in general it's how you look after yourself.

I was a carer throughout my 40's and really fucked my back up. I just carried on after knowing that I damaged it at one point. There's nothing I can do about it now. I have to exercise a lot more, and some days I'm just in pain and can barely bend at all. My thin back doesn't help. Backs in particular seem to have a mind of their own, so outside of painkillers they can be very hard to treat.

Best is always to look after yourself.

--pt"

Great advice

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Well I turned 47 on Friday and finding I’m more achey in the mornings the older I’m getting. My wrists and hands are painful too "

Happy belated!

I only use my wrists a few times a day now and it’s mostly when I’m on this bloody site. Are you the same??

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'm 48 and definitely wake up with more aches and pains than I did 10 years ago.

XX"

Charge it to the game init.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I've got more bad news Steve, 26 is when your metabolism seems to slow and you have to watch what you eat! "

*puts down chocolate cereal*

Fucking great

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I know I am slowing down and it takes longer to heal due to age but I have to say I also probably feel the best now I have for a long time.

I do think age is a mental thing as much as anything else. Over the last few years I have started to exercise and eat properly again and a lot of the aches and pains I had in my 30s have gone."

Well well well, how does it feel to know you’ve figured out life and are better than the rest of us?!

No but seriously, big up you this is sick

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"STEVE welcome back

Same for me with the drinking, have really cut back on alcohol these days. "

Thank you thank you

The alcohol is the worstttttttt.

Anyway can I buy you a drink sometime

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"That everytime I get out of a chair I make an involuntary noise"

Hahahaha! You fart don’t you?!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"im fucked but never give in"

Never give up, my friend

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By *aughty but nice...Man  over a year ago

Staffs

It now takes me 10 minutes to get out of bed from waking up

My back is in pieces....lol

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By *toC Thats MeWoman  over a year ago

Sheffield


"STEVE welcome back

Same for me with the drinking, have really cut back on alcohol these days.

Thank you thank you

The alcohol is the worstttttttt.

Anyway can I buy you a drink sometime "

Cos it’s you…hell yes x

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By *rHotNottsMan  over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Takes much longer to come - unless it’s anal & I’m ch0king her , less than 5 mins then

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By *emorefridaCouple  over a year ago

La la land

Hey welcome back OP.

Since my last birthday, I'm going to go against the grain of this thread. I'm more flexible, stronger and fitter. I also have more wrinkles and white hair appearing. So probably all balances out

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By *host63Man  over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham


"So I recently turned 26 (don’t forget to adjust your lower age limits accordingly ) and have found that I can’t drink as much as I once could and feel fine the next day!

What have you gorgeous people learned about yourselves only SINCE YOUR LAST BIRTHDAY?

"

26 is that all? Try reaching 60 and ask.

I ache all over despite being pretty fit. But on the plus side i am happier because I have less and less patience with other people's bullshit

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By *oding1Man  over a year ago

marlow


"Takes much longer to come - unless it’s anal & I’m ch0king her , less than 5 mins then "

What a lovely thought NOT

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