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Why do we lie?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We all do, at some point or another.
I know this has been done before but why would you lie about something, big or small?"
I never lie about anything important. I engage in what I like to call 'recreational lying', but never for any personal gain. |
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Your right in that we do so, usually 'little white lies'..
maybe some get so tied up in deception once they start something, then they feel they cant opt out by telling the truth..
the 'sas hero' guy who was a complete fake springs to mind..
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"We all do, at some point or another.
I know this has been done before but why would you lie about something, big or small?
I never lie about anything important. I engage in what I like to call 'recreational lying', but never for any personal gain."
Where is the line? |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Your right in that we do so, usually 'little white lies'..
maybe some get so tied up in deception once they start something, then they feel they cant opt out by telling the truth..
the 'sas hero' guy who was a complete fake springs to mind..
"
Yes, that's an interesting one. I watched Loving Miss Hatto over Christmas too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Serious response now:
Everybody Lies. Its a universal truth.
We lie to ourselves, to protect our egos, to preserve our sanity, to justify the things we do or to silence our consciences.
We lie to others, to protect them from themselves, to offer solace, to protect their ego or sense of self or to get what what we want.
Lies are subjective in their motives, their meanings and their magnitude.
Everybody lies. If you say you don't, you're simply lying to yourself.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Serious response now:
Everybody Lies. Its a universal truth.
We lie to ourselves, to protect our egos, to preserve our sanity, to justify the things we do or to silence our consciences.
We lie to others, to protect them from themselves, to offer solace, to protect their ego or sense of self or to get what what we want.
Lies are subjective in their motives, their meanings and their magnitude.
Everybody lies. If you have you don't, you're simply lying to yourself."
It's the lies we tell ourselves that has me thinking of this. The clips being shown on the Lance Armstrong inter_iew looked, to me, as though he had constructed a rationalisation that he wholly believes. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"insecurities, afraid of opening up and being honest, afraid of people acting differently towards you because the reality is 'i'm not all that'
"
How much of that is a lie and how much is projecting an external self to get through the day? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We all do, at some point or another.
I know this has been done before but why would you lie about something, big or small?
I never lie about anything important. I engage in what I like to call 'recreational lying', but never for any personal gain.
Where is the line?"
Lying to cause other people problems, or to encourage people to do things they wouldn't otherwise do, is past the line. I only tell lies that won't influence anyone's behaviour. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"We all do, at some point or another.
I know this has been done before but why would you lie about something, big or small?
I never lie about anything important. I engage in what I like to call 'recreational lying', but never for any personal gain.
Where is the line?
Lying to cause other people problems, or to encourage people to do things they wouldn't otherwise do, is past the line. I only tell lies that won't influence anyone's behaviour."
You are making a judgement about what would influence their behaviour. Does this include the omission lies? |
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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago
In Your Bush |
In here? or in general?
In here. A lot of the time people say what they believe others want to hear, or because it sounds good. Just browse through the current threads, it's easy to spot.
In general life, lots of reasons. To protect others, to big themselves up, insecurity, fear, self preservation. The list is endless |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"In here? or in general?
In here. A lot of the time people say what they believe others want to hear, or because it sounds good. Just browse through the current threads, it's easy to spot.
In general life, lots of reasons. To protect others, to big themselves up, insecurity, fear, self preservation. The list is endless"
As endless as the list of motivations. Some people seem to have more a propensity for lying though. |
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"insecurities, afraid of opening up and being honest, afraid of people acting differently towards you because the reality is 'i'm not all that'
"
is that a lie or is that a coping strategy..?
none of us are 'all that', anyone who thinks they are or aspires to be so has more issues than someone with insecurities.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We all do, at some point or another.
I know this has been done before but why would you lie about something, big or small?
I never lie about anything important. I engage in what I like to call 'recreational lying', but never for any personal gain.
Where is the line?
Lying to cause other people problems, or to encourage people to do things they wouldn't otherwise do, is past the line. I only tell lies that won't influence anyone's behaviour.
You are making a judgement about what would influence their behaviour. Does this include the omission lies?"
Let me clarify. If I tell a woman I've got a 14-inch salami packed away in my boxers, there's a small chance I might dishonestly affect her decision whether to lower her own underwear. And hence it's not something I'd lie about. If on the other hand I tell someone that, say, David and Victoria Beckham have bought a house in Loughborough, they're not likely to do much beyond calling me a liar. And that's where the web begins.
I don't lie about things that matter, ever. Lying gets you found out. |
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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago
In Your Bush |
"In here? or in general?
In here. A lot of the time people say what they believe others want to hear, or because it sounds good. Just browse through the current threads, it's easy to spot.
In general life, lots of reasons. To protect others, to big themselves up, insecurity, fear, self preservation. The list is endless
As endless as the list of motivations. Some people seem to have more a propensity for lying though."
Would you say withholding information is as bad as lying? |
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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago
In Your Bush |
"We all do, at some point or another.
I know this has been done before but why would you lie about something, big or small?
I never lie about anything important. I engage in what I like to call 'recreational lying', but never for any personal gain.
Where is the line?
Lying to cause other people problems, or to encourage people to do things they wouldn't otherwise do, is past the line. I only tell lies that won't influence anyone's behaviour.
You are making a judgement about what would influence their behaviour. Does this include the omission lies?
Let me clarify. If I tell a woman I've got a 14-inch salami packed away in my boxers, there's a small chance I might dishonestly affect her decision whether to lower her own underwear. And hence it's not something I'd lie about. If on the other hand I tell someone that, say, David and Victoria Beckham have bought a house in Loughborough, they're not likely to do much beyond calling me a liar. And that's where the web begins.
I don't lie about things that matter, ever. Lying gets you found out."
What you deem as something that matters, may be totally different to what someone else thinks though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am crap at lying.
Hence my affair with my late partner lasted a couple of months as both of us felt really bad about deceiving our respective spouses at the time.
I am known for my honesty at and outside work, some would say brutally and too honest for my own good.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We all do, at some point or another.
I know this has been done before but why would you lie about something, big or small?
I never lie about anything important. I engage in what I like to call 'recreational lying', but never for any personal gain.
Where is the line?
Lying to cause other people problems, or to encourage people to do things they wouldn't otherwise do, is past the line. I only tell lies that won't influence anyone's behaviour.
You are making a judgement about what would influence their behaviour. Does this include the omission lies?
Let me clarify. If I tell a woman I've got a 14-inch salami packed away in my boxers, there's a small chance I might dishonestly affect her decision whether to lower her own underwear. And hence it's not something I'd lie about. If on the other hand I tell someone that, say, David and Victoria Beckham have bought a house in Loughborough, they're not likely to do much beyond calling me a liar. And that's where the web begins.
I don't lie about things that matter, ever. Lying gets you found out.
What you deem as something that matters, may be totally different to what someone else thinks though"
I'm also careful who I spin this crap to! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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By making random oriental sounds. I once convinced a bunch of work colleagues I could speak fluent Japanese….
At first they were sceptical , but I managed to persuade them with the rational explanation, that when I was younger I had hoped to work for Nissan and spent a year at night school learning the language……
    |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Serious response now:
Everybody Lies. Its a universal truth.
We lie to ourselves, to protect our egos, to preserve our sanity, to justify the things we do or to silence our consciences.
We lie to others, to protect them from themselves, to offer solace, to protect their ego or sense of self or to get what what we want.
Lies are subjective in their motives, their meanings and their magnitude.
Everybody lies. If you say you don't, you're simply lying to yourself.
"
That is an outrageous thing to assume...
I DONT lie...I also don't pamper to my own or others insecurities, lies are like hitting a pause button on specific issues in life...they always come back to bite you.
I am brutaly honest and have chosen not to lie...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"By making random oriental sounds. I once convinced a bunch of work colleagues I could speak fluent Japanese….
At first they were sceptical , but I managed to persuade them with the rational explanation, that when I was younger I had hoped to work for Nissan and spent a year at night school learning the language……
"
quality. This is the sort of thing I do. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"In here? or in general?
In here. A lot of the time people say what they believe others want to hear, or because it sounds good. Just browse through the current threads, it's easy to spot.
In general life, lots of reasons. To protect others, to big themselves up, insecurity, fear, self preservation. The list is endless
As endless as the list of motivations. Some people seem to have more a propensity for lying though.
Would you say withholding information is as bad as lying?"
It depends what the information is and the purpose. Protecting your privacy can be seen as fine but if you are concealing a transmittable disease was that omission any less serious than lying and saying there is no disease? It's an extreme example. The other is the thread the other week about the woman saying she was on the pill before sex and then admitting she wasn't in the morning. |
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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago
In Your Bush |
"Serious response now:
Everybody Lies. Its a universal truth.
We lie to ourselves, to protect our egos, to preserve our sanity, to justify the things we do or to silence our consciences.
We lie to others, to protect them from themselves, to offer solace, to protect their ego or sense of self or to get what what we want.
Lies are subjective in their motives, their meanings and their magnitude.
Everybody lies. If you say you don't, you're simply lying to yourself.
That is an outrageous thing to assume...
I DONT lie...I also don't pamper to my own or others insecurities, lies are like hitting a pause button on specific issues in life...they always come back to bite you.
I am brutaly honest and have chosen not to lie... "
Liar |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Serious response now:
Everybody Lies. Its a universal truth.
We lie to ourselves, to protect our egos, to preserve our sanity, to justify the things we do or to silence our consciences.
We lie to others, to protect them from themselves, to offer solace, to protect their ego or sense of self or to get what what we want.
Lies are subjective in their motives, their meanings and their magnitude.
Everybody lies. If you say you don't, you're simply lying to yourself.
That is an outrageous thing to assume...
I DONT lie...I also don't pamper to my own or others insecurities, lies are like hitting a pause button on specific issues in life...they always come back to bite you.
I am brutaly honest and have chosen not to lie...
Liar "
Any evidence of that or are ye just saying that because you can't stop lying??  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"By making random oriental sounds. I once convinced a bunch of work colleagues I could speak fluent Japanese….
At first they were sceptical , but I managed to persuade them with the rational explanation, that when I was younger I had hoped to work for Nissan and spent a year at night school learning the language……
quality. This is the sort of thing I do."
Oh so yous both manipulate people? 
Well done have a fkn big star!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"By making random oriental sounds. I once convinced a bunch of work colleagues I could speak fluent Japanese….
At first they were sceptical , but I managed to persuade them with the rational explanation, that when I was younger I had hoped to work for Nissan and spent a year at night school learning the language……
quality. This is the sort of thing I do.
Oh so yous both manipulate people?
Well done have a fkn big star!! "
Do you really think that amounts to manipulation? It's a completely harmless pile of nonsense. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"By making random oriental sounds. I once convinced a bunch of work colleagues I could speak fluent Japanese….
At first they were sceptical , but I managed to persuade them with the rational explanation, that when I was younger I had hoped to work for Nissan and spent a year at night school learning the language……
quality. This is the sort of thing I do.
Oh so yous both manipulate people?
Well done have a fkn big star!! "
haha....Did you believe my storey?.... |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"By making random oriental sounds. I once convinced a bunch of work colleagues I could speak fluent Japanese….
At first they were sceptical , but I managed to persuade them with the rational explanation, that when I was younger I had hoped to work for Nissan and spent a year at night school learning the language……
quality. This is the sort of thing I do.
Oh so yous both manipulate people?
Well done have a fkn big star!!
Do you really think that amounts to manipulation? It's a completely harmless pile of nonsense."
It may be or your manager may now think they have an additional asset and begin plans for work with the Japanese, ready to talk to you about promotion to help on the campaign. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"By making random oriental sounds. I once convinced a bunch of work colleagues I could speak fluent Japanese….
At first they were sceptical , but I managed to persuade them with the rational explanation, that when I was younger I had hoped to work for Nissan and spent a year at night school learning the language……
quality. This is the sort of thing I do.
Oh so yous both manipulate people?
Well done have a fkn big star!!
Do you really think that amounts to manipulation? It's a completely harmless pile of nonsense.
It may be or your manager may now think they have an additional asset and begin plans for work with the Japanese, ready to talk to you about promotion to help on the campaign."
 Now that's different. If speaking Japanese could enhance your career prospects and you lie about it, you're taking a bit of a risk. It'll all unravel when you land in Tokyo for an important meeting and can't understand a syllable anyone's saying.
Like I say: always harmless, always unimportant stuff, otherwise you get into trouble. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"
Oh so yous both manipulate people?
Well done have a fkn big star!!
Do you really think that amounts to manipulation? It's a completely harmless pile of nonsense.
It may be or your manager may now think they have an additional asset and begin plans for work with the Japanese, ready to talk to you about promotion to help on the campaign.
Now that's different. If speaking Japanese could enhance your career prospects and you lie about it, you're taking a bit of a risk. It'll all unravel when you land in Tokyo for an important meeting and can't understand a syllable anyone's saying.
Like I say: always harmless, always unimportant stuff, otherwise you get into trouble."
Or people don't ever take you seriously. |
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"When I was 7 I convinced my friend and girlfriend that I was bionic.
Ever since then I have loved bullshitting and _iew it as an art from.
Does that make you a shit artist?"
It's been said before lol |
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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago
In Your Bush |
"Serious response now:
Everybody Lies. Its a universal truth.
We lie to ourselves, to protect our egos, to preserve our sanity, to justify the things we do or to silence our consciences.
We lie to others, to protect them from themselves, to offer solace, to protect their ego or sense of self or to get what what we want.
Lies are subjective in their motives, their meanings and their magnitude.
Everybody lies. If you say you don't, you're simply lying to yourself.
That is an outrageous thing to assume...
I DONT lie...I also don't pamper to my own or others insecurities, lies are like hitting a pause button on specific issues in life...they always come back to bite you.
I am brutaly honest and have chosen not to lie...
Liar
Any evidence of that or are ye just saying that because you can't stop lying?? "
I just don't know why I do it |
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"By making random oriental sounds. I once convinced a bunch of work colleagues I could speak fluent Japanese….
At first they were sceptical , but I managed to persuade them with the rational explanation, that when I was younger I had hoped to work for Nissan and spent a year at night school learning the language……
quality. This is the sort of thing I do.
Oh so yous both manipulate people?
Well done have a fkn big star!!
haha....Did you believe my storey?.... "
not frukin rikery..  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Or people don't ever take you seriously."
Exactly. If you do it to everyone, nobody ever believes a word you say. I only do it to two or three people, and I always ultimately confess to lying. If I'm talking to someone new, stringing together an elaborate lie is a complete waste of time and effort. I like to build new friendships on complete honesty  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"By making random oriental sounds. I once convinced a bunch of work colleagues I could speak fluent Japanese….
At first they were sceptical , but I managed to persuade them with the rational explanation, that when I was younger I had hoped to work for Nissan and spent a year at night school learning the language……
quality. This is the sort of thing I do.
Oh so yous both manipulate people?
Well done have a fkn big star!!
Do you really think that amounts to manipulation? It's a completely harmless pile of nonsense.
It may be or your manager may now think they have an additional asset and begin plans for work with the Japanese, ready to talk to you about promotion to help on the campaign.
Now that's different. If speaking Japanese could enhance your career prospects and you lie about it, you're taking a bit of a risk. It'll all unravel when you land in Tokyo for an important meeting and can't understand a syllable anyone's saying.
Like I say: always harmless, always unimportant stuff, otherwise you get into trouble."
Oh.... I think the scenario painted does have merit,,,, however I'm my case, it wasn't then, and will never be applicable..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Serious response now:
Everybody Lies. Its a universal truth.
We lie to ourselves, to protect our egos, to preserve our sanity, to justify the things we do or to silence our consciences.
We lie to others, to protect them from themselves, to offer solace, to protect their ego or sense of self or to get what what we want.
Lies are subjective in their motives, their meanings and their magnitude.
Everybody lies. If you say you don't, you're simply lying to yourself.
That is an outrageous thing to assume...
I DONT lie...I also don't pamper to my own or others insecurities, lies are like hitting a pause button on specific issues in life...they always come back to bite you.
I am brutaly honest and have chosen not to lie... "
Maybe I'm lying then.
See, so often, what people believe as the truth depends entirely on a particular point of _iew.
Truth. Lies. Its all subjective. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We all do, at some point or another.
I know this has been done before but why would you lie about something, big or small?"
coz the new truth is to lie. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We all do, at some point or another.
I know this has been done before but why would you lie about something, big or small?"
Lots spout lies cos they are insecure in life and feel they have to live a dream rather than shitty reality and thats so sad. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We all do, at some point or another.
I know this has been done before but why would you lie about something, big or small?
coz the new truth is to lie. "
Aint that the truth! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We all do, at some point or another.
I know this has been done before but why would you lie about something, big or small?
coz the new truth is to lie.
Aint that the truth!"
No. |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
I dont like lies and the only time I feel it is ok is when it is for the (genuine) benefit of another person.
Like so many things in life, there is a vast array of grey shades between black and white and I can think of situations (eg when giving a patient a terminal diagnosis) where lying or modifying the truth to protect the patient would be ok in my books. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I dont like lies and the only time I feel it is ok is when it is for the (genuine) benefit of another person.
Like so many things in life, there is a vast array of grey shades between black and white and I can think of situations (eg when giving a patient a terminal diagnosis) where lying or modifying the truth to protect the patient would be ok in my books."
I agree that there are more shades of grey than that book would suggest when it comes to truth and lies. That said, one person's grey area is clearly black/white for another. If I were your terminal patient I would want all of the information as plainly as possible. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OK….. here’s a lie I posted in another thread,,,,
Two snowmen chatting….. one says to the other…. “Can you smell carrots”
Oh yeah,,,, part of that is not true,,,,
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OK….. here’s a lie I posted in another thread,,,,
Two snowmen chatting….. one says to the other…. “Can you smell carrots”
Oh yeah,,,, part of that is not true,,,,
"
It was 'Parsnips' really, wasn't it |
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"We all do, at some point or another.
I know this has been done before but why would you lie about something, big or small?
I never lie about anything important. I engage in what I like to call 'recreational lying', but never for any personal gain.
Where is the line?"
In my opinion when you start a lie, if it is something that is for someone else's benefit such as 'no your arse is not the size of a mountain as she already has an issue with said arse' that can be ok...if it is for YOUR benefit 'of course I am single (because he will get a shag if he tells her that) then that's wrong...Generally...I know there will be exceptions... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OK….. here’s a lie I posted in another thread,,,,
Two snowmen chatting….. one says to the other…. “Can you smell carrots”
Oh yeah,,,, part of that is not true,,,,
It was 'Parsnips' really, wasn't it"
For fear of reprisal, I’m not at liberty to divulge that information…. …..
But suffice to say,,,, your not completely wrong….!. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"OK….. here’s a lie I posted in another thread,,,,
Two snowmen chatting….. one says to the other…. “Can you smell carrots”
Oh yeah,,,, part of that is not true,,,,
It was 'Parsnips' really, wasn't it
For fear of reprisal, I’m not at liberty to divulge that information…. …..
But suffice to say,,,, your not completely wrong….!. "
Have you made naughty snowmen again? |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"We all do, at some point or another.
I know this has been done before but why would you lie about something, big or small?
I never lie about anything important. I engage in what I like to call 'recreational lying', but never for any personal gain.
Where is the line?
In my opinion when you start a lie, if it is something that is for someone else's benefit such as 'no your arse is not the size of a mountain as she already has an issue with said arse' that can be ok...if it is for YOUR benefit 'of course I am single (because he will get a shag if he tells her that) then that's wrong...Generally...I know there will be exceptions..."
Spot on... the difference lies in who benefits.
Agree with Lickety that I would want to know the whole truth in case of illness but I am aware of some people including friends who are better off not knowing tall the details. Guess it needs to be weighed up carefully. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"OK….. here’s a lie I posted in another thread,,,,
Two snowmen chatting….. one says to the other…. “Can you smell carrots”
Oh yeah,,,, part of that is not true,,,,
It was 'Parsnips' really, wasn't it
For fear of reprisal, I’m not at liberty to divulge that information…. …..
But suffice to say,,,, your not completely wrong….!.
Have you made naughty snowmen again?"
Yes, it's just so satisfying watching my neighbours becoming more and more irate at the sight of these two uber camp snowmen proudly displaying their huge vegetable appendages towards one-another….!. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Would the person with the fat arse agree with you if she felt you had lied to her and let her go out in public?
You could say that skirt or whatever don't suit you...you don't have to be offensive to be honest and truthful!! |
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This may or may not be true! 
