FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > How much have you tried to change the circle of life
How much have you tried to change the circle of life
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By *TG3 OP Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
For example you look at your parents your friends and think I'm not going to do that I'd do this, i mean is having children at 16/17 a good thing and relationships at that age how long do they last , is being in a dead end job a good thing or a bad thing it still pays the bills, is renting or buying the best option. Well is it?  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For example you look at your parents your friends and think I'm not going to do that I'd do this, i mean is having children at 16/17 a good thing and relationships at that age how long do they last , is being in a dead end job a good thing or a bad thing it still pays the bills, is renting or buying the best option. Well is it? "
I had a child at 16. Having a child at 31 left me disabled so I think having the first at 16 was great, actually.
I studiously avoid doing 99.9% of the things my parents did. For the better.
We've been in a relationship since we were 17/18 and married at 22/23. We're doing pretty well so far  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *TG3 OP Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"My parents both went to University and I didn't. Unusual reversal !"
i was just thinking about that i mean how important is education if you excel and say for example go into medicine or the law profession you spend the rest of your very short life immersed in learning but do you achieve anything ultimately? The simplest people it would appear are the happiest family units stay together for generations |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *TG3 OP Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"I got the snip so no kids for us. Seems like a good start 
LvM"
well yes thats kind of breaking the circle of life are you happy without children i guess you won't know until later in life |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"For example you look at your parents your friends and think I'm not going to do that I'd do this, i mean is having children at 16/17 a good thing and relationships at that age how long do they last , is being in a dead end job a good thing or a bad thing it still pays the bills, is renting or buying the best option. Well is it? "
There’s no right or wrong answers, depends what’s important to you. For some people their job really isn’t that important and renting is fine. I’m renting & buying , had kids at 18, 28 and want more still!
I want to run out of money on the day I die ! If I have money left I’ll be gutted I could have retired earlier or gave more away when I was alive. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"My parents both went to University and I didn't. Unusual reversal !
i was just thinking about that i mean how important is education if you excel and say for example go into medicine or the law profession you spend the rest of your very short life immersed in learning but do you achieve anything ultimately? The simplest people it would appear are the happiest family units stay together for generations "
Again I disagree as my daughter has a PhD in Nuclear Physics. She does a hugely worthwhile job interpreting brain scans for tumours and Parkinson's Disease and we have a brilliant relationship and communicate daily, despite her living in USA. I see my 84 year old mother (who has a double first degree) six days a week. Education has no relevance to family bonds. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *TG3 OP Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"For example you look at your parents your friends and think I'm not going to do that I'd do this, i mean is having children at 16/17 a good thing and relationships at that age how long do they last , is being in a dead end job a good thing or a bad thing it still pays the bills, is renting or buying the best option. Well is it?
There’s no right or wrong answers, depends what’s important to you. For some people their job really isn’t that important and renting is fine. I’m renting & buying , had kids at 18, 28 and want more still!
I want to run out of money on the day I die ! If I have money left I’ll be gutted I could have retired earlier or gave more away when I was alive. "
Yes that age old problem inheritance tax |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think we all learn from our parents, if we choose to, both good and bad. I tried not to make the same mistakes they made, and I hope my children improve on mine. They seem to be doing ok so far.. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I got the snip so no kids for us. Seems like a good start
LvM
Well yes thats kind of breaking the circle of life are you happy without children i guess you won't know until later in life "
Neither of us want kids, and if it ever did change and we felt that strongly about it, we could always adopt anyway I suppose 
LvM |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Both my parents were alcoholics. I had an absolutely horrendous upbringing because of it. For this reason I’m a teetotal. I really hate to ever think I could end up like them, bitter and horrible. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *rder66Man
over a year ago
Tatooine |
I grew up in a hippy commune, lived around the UK, lived abroad for ten years in which I traveled around as well as working there, had my child in my late 30's, I'm a single parent.
I would say my whole life as been quite leftfield to most so I'm not sure about breaking the cycle of life, just enjoy the journey you are on and don't give way to society, religious, peers, politicians or anybody elses idea of what or how you should live your life.
Do what fits and feel right for you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
My dad was/is a d*unk he's never had a job in his life, well except the ones that pay cash in hand so he didn't have to pay maintenance.
My mum the most important thing to her had always been the bloke she's with us kids came 2nd to that.
I made sure I worked my way into a good career I tell my kids I love them many times a day and give them the affection I didn't.
Now I do get on with my parents I accept their flaws and my dad's a happy d*unk luckily, however it wasn't a fun childhood and I wouldn't want my kids ever being in such an environment so I made/make a conscious effort not to be anything like them.
Mrs |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Oh. We’re being honest, and I suppose this is cheaper than therapy?
I’m there for my kids where my dad wasn’t. I got a birthday message this year on the right date from my dad for the first time. I guess the woman he’s with knows how to use F*crboik calander or something. I’m there for my two boys, I will move mountains to let them know I’m there for them.
My mum beat her children and left scars deeper than the cleaver cuts and teeth marks I have. I’ve never lifted a finger to my kids. (Apart from that one time I punched his arm becaus he made me laugh, and he called “assault!” Made me laugh again!
I never got advice or influence from my children and I come from a broken home, and although my marriage broke down from which I take a lo of blame, I refuse! I REFUSE! to let it repeat because I know my mum came from a background that was hard. I know my dad has his problems.
I believe in Cutting the chain. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I’ve moved from where I grew up and didn’t follow my parents - I have a really close bond with my son and I ensure I talk about different things to him always and let him know that he can talk to me always.
My dad can’t talk about anything emotional or with emotion…he doesn’t have a clue how to talks to kids at all and my mum has a huge chip on her shoulder with the life she got dealt.
I am of the opinion that life is what you make if it. Your decisions are your choices and shape you and your path - it’s no one else’s fault when things go wrong.
K |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Mum had me at 17, she was and still is brilliant. Very loving.
Dad was violent physically, not so brilliant. Provided though.
Never hit my kids, only ever fought physically to defend myself. Guess that breaks the circle thing?
Buying is generally better, unless you want freedom to move. Not to be underrated.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
My parents worked hard. They were poor when I was very young but they pushed through life and have done well for themselves. As fair as I am concerned they are a role model for me and have no desire to not follow their circle. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
My mum is an amazing woman. She is my role model and I admire her greatly.
She is not university educated, i wouldn't say she has a dead end job she is in a relationship that I dont understand at all but it's her life. she was married at 17 and had 3 children by the age of 25. She worked 3 jobs in order to give us the best life she could. She is extremely independent and hard working.
My dad I don't speak to he is a toxic human being.
I have done some things differently but I can only hope that my son looks at me the same way I look at my mum. She is extremely practical, and an amazing human being.
I would not be the person I am today without her influence and for that I'm forever grateful. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *TG3 OP Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"My mum is an amazing woman. She is my role model and I admire her greatly.
She is not university educated, i wouldn't say she has a dead end job she is in a relationship that I dont understand at all but it's her life. she was married at 17 and had 3 children by the age of 25. She worked 3 jobs in order to give us the best life she could. She is extremely independent and hard working.
My dad I don't speak to he is a toxic human being.
I have done some things differently but I can only hope that my son looks at me the same way I look at my mum. She is extremely practical, and an amazing human being.
I would not be the person I am today without her influence and for that I'm forever grateful. "
You sound as though you love your mum and are proud of her? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *TG3 OP Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"I’ve moved from where I grew up and didn’t follow my parents - I have a really close bond with my son and I ensure I talk about different things to him always and let him know that he can talk to me always.
My dad can’t talk about anything emotional or with emotion…he doesn’t have a clue how to talks to kids at all and my mum has a huge chip on her shoulder with the life she got dealt.
I am of the opinion that life is what you make if it. Your decisions are your choices and shape you and your path - it’s no one else’s fault when things go wrong.
K"
exactly we are in charge of our destiny |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *TG3 OP Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"My dad was/is a d*unk he's never had a job in his life, well except the ones that pay cash in hand so he didn't have to pay maintenance.
My mum the most important thing to her had always been the bloke she's with us kids came 2nd to that.
I made sure I worked my way into a good career I tell my kids I love them many times a day and give them the affection I didn't.
Now I do get on with my parents I accept their flaws and my dad's a happy d*unk luckily, however it wasn't a fun childhood and I wouldn't want my kids ever being in such an environment so I made/make a conscious effort not to be anything like them.
Mrs "
Its weird my parents never really got on my mum was mastermind clever and my dad hated that about her but i would say i had a happy childhood even though i took a few beatings as the oldest child |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I knew from an early age that my dad was a judgemental bigot. Right from being the age of 8 I vowed never to be like him and I'm not. I'm the opposite. My mum is so strong and my backbone and I wouldn't be here without here. I wish I could be half the woman she is |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
