FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you stand up for yourself?
Do you stand up for yourself?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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As the title suggests, do you?
I sometimes will and I sometimes won't. I like an easy life, but I also like injustice rectified and we all know that doesn't happen until you stand up and ask for it (or demand it in some cases).
This is off the back of being on the phone to the Home Office. I want to throw my face into a pillow and scream but I also don't want to let it get the better of me. I am bigger and better than that   
F |
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If someone challenges my integrity in some way, yes sometimes I will draw a line in the sand and tell they have crossed it.
If it's someone I care about I will take time out to explain myself to them. If it's someone I don't know or it's unsubstantiated, there's good chance they will be told to fuck off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always stick up for myself and others if I feel like something needs to be said. There is some instances where I just can’t be fucked though so I just let people think whatever the like and get on with my day |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A bit too much at times
I find that in work in particular, if you rock the corporate boat, you're seen as a trouble causer
Too often I have seen employers ride roughshod over basic matters of morals and ethics in an attempt to garner power / profits and smooth corporate image
I am far from militant, but I won't have the piss took out of me either |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m more likely to stand up for someone else. I can easily let people think they get one over on me, if I don’t care about them.
‘I’d never steal a horse off someone I didn’t like’
*one for the film nerds. 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For a lot of years I put up with a lot of crap.
My tolerance for wankers and dickheads and those that think they're better than me is now below zero.
So yes I do.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"As the title suggests, do you?
I sometimes will and I sometimes won't. I like an easy life, but I also like injustice rectified and we all know that doesn't happen until you stand up and ask for it (or demand it in some cases).
This is off the back of being on the phone to the Home Office. I want to throw my face into a pillow and scream but I also don't want to let it get the better of me. I am bigger and better than that
F"
I can throw your face in the pillow and make you scream.... As I tickle your feet  |
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By *lex46TV/TS
over a year ago
Near Wells |
Yes I do. I'll accept responsibility for any errors but if somebody is trying to lump the blame on me or criticise, I will soon fight back.
Only the other day someone accused me of ruining their day (a work thing) I asked how I'd ruined their day, ended up a full blown row, neither of us backing down.
The older I get, the louder I become. |
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No,I avoid confrontation at all costs.
Doesn't mean I'm a pushover I just don't believe in arguing for arguing sake.
Some people need to piss and moan,shout and bluster.
I prefer to stand let them get on with and ignore. |
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By *red333Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"As the title suggests, do you?
I sometimes will and I sometimes won't. I like an easy life, but I also like injustice rectified and we all know that doesn't happen until you stand up and ask for it (or demand it in some cases).
This is off the back of being on the phone to the Home Office. I want to throw my face into a pillow and scream but I also don't want to let it get the better of me. I am bigger and better than that
F"
On here you have to women win |
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Rarely, I will if it's absolutely necessary but I hate confrontation, that doesn't mean I'm a push over though.
I'm more likely to stick up for others than myself.
I like an easy life and most of the time it's just not worth stopping down to that level.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m more likely to stand up for someone else. I can easily let people think they get one over on me, if I don’t care about them.
‘I’d never steal a horse off someone I didn’t like’
*one for the film nerds.
"
And please, don’t mistake this as me being a soft touch or I can be took the piss out of.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes I do, you can always stand up for yourself and make your point without being rude, angry or irrational. I have also spoken up for others when they haven't had the voice they needed.
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I feel I’m diplomatic in the majority of issues that have arisen over the last few years. In negotiations they say whisper so those who you’re talking to have to really listen.
Shouting or violence very rarely gets a positive outcome, that’s why I very rarely do it these days. Hopefully that’s a more mature approach to conflict than I used to have. |
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I really wish I could do this more. Im super introverted and hate confrontation, it normally just makes me cry. Like some others have said, i would be more likely to do it for other people than myself. X |
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By *host63Man
over a year ago
Bedfont Feltham |
Yes I do but it's diffrent for men and women. Most women have no off switch and will keep arguing even if the other party is losing their temper. Men have a cut off because we know if yiu push it too far it an turn to violence. |
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By *host63Man
over a year ago
Bedfont Feltham |
Yes I do but it's diffrent for men and women. Most women have no off switch and will keep arguing even if the other party is losing their temper. Men have a cut off because we know if yiu push it too far it an turn to violence. |
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"Rarely, I will if it's absolutely necessary but I hate confrontation, that doesn't mean I'm a push over though.
I'm more likely to stick up for others than myself.
I like an easy life and most of the time it's just not worth stopping down to that level.
Mrs "
Almost exactly the same . Saves me typing it all but yes this ^ |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
It's depends on the situation. If it's something silly or petty than no I can't be arsed arguing about it. Better just to ignore the person stirring shite.
For more important things like in work or with something that means a lot to me yes I will stand up for myself I won't get rude or stroppy that defeats the whole point of standing up for yourself. I spent years letting people take advantage of me and walk all over me but I don't anymore.And life is better since I decided to as well. |
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Yes, very much so. I've been a single mum for over 15 years and had to stand up for myself as it was just me. I'm naturally assertive and confident, but love that Buff makes me feel that I don't need to stand forward so much as he is in my life. |
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On here there's no point, I let it go over my head.
In the real non fabworld, I will always stick up for myself, my family and animals. Neither will I put up with any bullying or injustices happening around me. |
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It depends on the situation, but I have been known to robustly defend myself at times. If I feel I have been treated poorly or unfairly I will stand up for myself. I have however been effectively banished by people for doing so. In my mind it was worth it, and should the need ever arise, I will do so again. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
More frequently nowadays. At the same time, I'm also quite likely to try and not say anything because I'd rather a simple life and it now takes a lot for me to say 'actually, no, do fuck off'.
I think sometimes I'm prepared to put up with a lot of crap because I convince myself that I should rather than potentially upsetting someone. That's a habit that needs stomping out.  |
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Not so much these days. Useless I feel you’re taking me for a mug. I’ve caused/seen enough drama in my life to fill two lifetimes. All about the easy life these days.
Plus my temper is quite scary so I try a keep in under lock and key.
The mr |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
I'm better at standing up for other people that myself, especially in work. Things happen that annoy me with management or changes and to me I'm more likely to speak up if I know it's upsetting colleagues. |
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i worked the door for 18 years all told and part of the reason i was so good at the job was that i am excellent at conflict resolution & management, i was always the one to broker peace when friends fell out, still do that occasionally i guess. i'm pretty good with people. i wasn't going to mention self defence training in relation to the doors, as my ability to look after myself, in my opinion, had nothing to do with my competence on the job, it just came in handy on the rare occasions diplomacy failed. Self Defence is relevant now as the only reason i gave in and let my Parents push me into classes, aside from the fact that i realised that, if i knew how to fight then, getting out of fights would be easier, was that they felt i never stood up for myself. So, from about age 12, when i started Aikido, i have believed in standing up for myself.
i always get every side in a story, if i am trying to resolve a conflict and see things from the perspective of others and, at least for the past 13 years, i try and approach everything from a logical standpoint.
i feel the flipside of this is that i am also happy to hold my hands up and admit when i'm wrong.
Just my tuppenceworth. |
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I should probably do it more in work… but it’s a snake pit and I’m too old and can’t be a*seed getting involved anymore or with the hassle.
One of the best pieces of advice I got as a teenager starting out working life , Fly under the radar as much as possible , never be first but never be last. |
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Im hit or miss in this Dept,
Depending on my mood or level of Fffks being thrown my way,
Im normally calm and calculated, but when i blow im a nasty little shit,(verbally)
One thing i have zero tolerance for is bullies, to the point that i break the, (head down mind your own business rule). |
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I have absolutely no qualms about standing up for myself, no matter who the other person is.
At work especially, I've learnt that different ways of doing so are more effective at times...rather than go in all guns blazing like I have in the past, I pick my battles and use different tactics. I've also realised that it's sometimes more beneficial to me to back down...or at least give the impression that I have. |
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By * F 2018Couple
over a year ago
shropshire |
"As the title suggests, do you?
I sometimes will and I sometimes won't. I like an easy life, but I also like injustice rectified and we all know that doesn't happen until you stand up and ask for it (or demand it in some cases).
This is off the back of being on the phone to the Home Office. I want to throw my face into a pillow and scream but I also don't want to let it get the better of me. I am bigger and better than that
F"
Sometimes....depends on emotions, situations how I'm feeling |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have absolutely no qualms about standing up for myself, no matter who the other person is.
At work especially, I've learnt that different ways of doing so are more effective at times...rather than go in all guns blazing like I have in the past, I pick my battles and use different tactics. I've also realised that it's sometimes more beneficial to me to back down...or at least give the impression that I have. "
Always good to be the silent one at times and bide your time… I still owe you that walk in hills don’t I? |
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"I have absolutely no qualms about standing up for myself, no matter who the other person is.
At work especially, I've learnt that different ways of doing so are more effective at times...rather than go in all guns blazing like I have in the past, I pick my battles and use different tactics. I've also realised that it's sometimes more beneficial to me to back down...or at least give the impression that I have.
Always good to be the silent one at times and bide your time… I still owe you that walk in hills don’t I? "
You're back!
Yes you do...one day we'll make it onto those hills  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have absolutely no qualms about standing up for myself, no matter who the other person is.
At work especially, I've learnt that different ways of doing so are more effective at times...rather than go in all guns blazing like I have in the past, I pick my battles and use different tactics. I've also realised that it's sometimes more beneficial to me to back down...or at least give the impression that I have.
Always good to be the silent one at times and bide your time… I still owe you that walk in hills don’t I?
You're back!
Yes you do...one day we'll make it onto those hills "
Well soon I hope and yes “I’m back” needed a sabbatical to reset and move forward alls good and I’m glad to be catching up |
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