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Putin warns of nuclear strikes.Emergency phone test tomorrow.Coincidence?
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By *ryan... OP Man
over a year ago
1950's Original |
Quickly now learn Russian..
Top tip.. Russian porn has lots of Russian words in it..
All houses who's phone has a " publicly traded entity" warning on it..will be targeted first. ...so not all bad.....
DONT PANIC.....
( ps..panic)
  
( |
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Do you think my neighbours will mind if I spray paint public traded entity over the outside of the apartment block?
Will daubing the blood of a sacrificial goat on my individual front door work? I'll only piss off those on my landing if I do that, not everyone  |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
I'm going to be so confused when my phone makes a noise I don't recognise.
Doesn't matter how often I'm reminded of this warning thingy, it'll totally baffle me. |
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"I can't be arsed to panic, it seems unnecessary.
But spasiba for the advice  "
I played the long game and did Russian at school. If you want to know my name or directions to the metro, I'm sorted.
Winning! |
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By *ryan... OP Man
over a year ago
1950's Original |
"Do you think my neighbours will mind if I spray paint public traded entity over the outside of the apartment block?
Will daubing the blood of a sacrificial goat on my individual front door work? I'll only piss off those on my landing if I do that, not everyone "
The goats would have to be born in the month of late December or January to be truly sacrificial ( or any passing Capricorns will do really)  |
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"I can't be arsed to panic, it seems unnecessary.
But spasiba for the advice
I played the long game and did Russian at school. If you want to know my name or directions to the metro, I'm sorted.
Winning!"
Kak vas zovut?
(Cyrillic no worky ) |
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"Do you think my neighbours will mind if I spray paint public traded entity over the outside of the apartment block?
Will daubing the blood of a sacrificial goat on my individual front door work? I'll only piss off those on my landing if I do that, not everyone
The goats would have to be born in the month of late December or January to be truly sacrificial ( or any passing Capricorns will do really) "
Human sacrifice is the only atonement that will do for Putin's madness and what is being wrought upon British society with a test tweet.
Gird your loins. Hide your women! |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Do you think my neighbours will mind if I spray paint public traded entity over the outside of the apartment block?
Will daubing the blood of a sacrificial goat on my individual front door work? I'll only piss off those on my landing if I do that, not everyone
The goats would have to be born in the month of late December or January to be truly sacrificial ( or any passing Capricorns will do really)
Human sacrifice is the only atonement that will do for Putin's madness and what is being wrought upon British society with a test tweet.
Gird your loins. Hide your women!"
That seems like a lot of hard work. Could we not just press the thing when it comes up on the phone to shut the noise off? |
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"I can't be arsed to panic, it seems unnecessary.
But spasiba for the advice
I played the long game and did Russian at school. If you want to know my name or directions to the metro, I'm sorted.
Winning!
Kak vas zovut?
(Cyrillic no worky )"
Menya zovut YOLO!  |
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By *ryan... OP Man
over a year ago
1950's Original |
"Do you think my neighbours will mind if I spray paint public traded entity over the outside of the apartment block?
Will daubing the blood of a sacrificial goat on my individual front door work? I'll only piss off those on my landing if I do that, not everyone
The goats would have to be born in the month of late December or January to be truly sacrificial ( or any passing Capricorns will do really)
Human sacrifice is the only atonement that will do for Putin's madness and what is being wrought upon British society with a test tweet.
Gird your loins. Hide your women!"
..way ahead of you .. they're under the patio  |
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"Do you think my neighbours will mind if I spray paint public traded entity over the outside of the apartment block?
Will daubing the blood of a sacrificial goat on my individual front door work? I'll only piss off those on my landing if I do that, not everyone
The goats would have to be born in the month of late December or January to be truly sacrificial ( or any passing Capricorns will do really)
Human sacrifice is the only atonement that will do for Putin's madness and what is being wrought upon British society with a test tweet.
Gird your loins. Hide your women!
That seems like a lot of hard work. Could we not just press the thing when it comes up on the phone to shut the noise off?"
That's what I'm going to do, but I don't think it's a nefarious doom plot or whatever  |
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"I can't be arsed to panic, it seems unnecessary.
But spasiba for the advice
I played the long game and did Russian at school. If you want to know my name or directions to the metro, I'm sorted.
Winning!
Kak vas zovut?
(Cyrillic no worky )
Menya zovut YOLO! "
Da? Spasiba, rad vstreche
See, OP. We're good. We can communicate with our new overlords |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Do you think my neighbours will mind if I spray paint public traded entity over the outside of the apartment block?
Will daubing the blood of a sacrificial goat on my individual front door work? I'll only piss off those on my landing if I do that, not everyone
The goats would have to be born in the month of late December or January to be truly sacrificial ( or any passing Capricorns will do really)
Human sacrifice is the only atonement that will do for Putin's madness and what is being wrought upon British society with a test tweet.
Gird your loins. Hide your women!
That seems like a lot of hard work. Could we not just press the thing when it comes up on the phone to shut the noise off?
That's what I'm going to do, but I don't think it's a nefarious doom plot or whatever "
It might be. I just don't have the energy |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I can't be arsed to panic, it seems unnecessary.
But spasiba for the advice
I played the long game and did Russian at school. If you want to know my name or directions to the metro, I'm sorted.
Winning!
Kak vas zovut?
(Cyrillic no worky )
Menya zovut YOLO!
Da? Spasiba, rad vstreche
See, OP. We're good. We can communicate with our new overlords "
If I give you my last rolo would you tell them I'm really tired and could they keep the noise down please? Please? |
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"I can't be arsed to panic, it seems unnecessary.
But spasiba for the advice
I played the long game and did Russian at school. If you want to know my name or directions to the metro, I'm sorted.
Winning!
Kak vas zovut?
(Cyrillic no worky )
Menya zovut YOLO!
Da? Spasiba, rad vstreche
See, OP. We're good. We can communicate with our new overlords
If I give you my last rolo would you tell them I'm really tired and could they keep the noise down please? Please?"
Da |
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"Quickly now learn Russian..
Top tip.. Russian porn has lots of Russian words in it..
All houses who's phone has a " publicly traded entity" warning on it..will be targeted first. ...so not all bad.....
DONT PANIC....
( ps..panic)
("
No panic, either our defence systems work of we cop for it. Panic or worry achieves nothing. |
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By *ryan... OP Man
over a year ago
1950's Original |
"5Live were playing all the countries different ringtones, lots of buzzes and sirens but the Italian one sounded particularly Italian  "
..
I think the Icelandic one is Bjork just singing a high note... From Reykjavik ..no phone required |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you think my neighbours will mind if I spray paint public traded entity over the outside of the apartment block?
Will daubing the blood of a sacrificial goat on my individual front door work? I'll only piss off those on my landing if I do that, not everyone "
Was about to send you this thread, make sure you’re prepared! |
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"Do you think my neighbours will mind if I spray paint public traded entity over the outside of the apartment block?
Will daubing the blood of a sacrificial goat on my individual front door work? I'll only piss off those on my landing if I do that, not everyone
Was about to send you this thread, make sure you’re prepared!"
https://youtu.be/zPUe7O3ODHQ
(Be Prepared - Lion King) |
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"Don't worry Rambo will sort it all out.
Besides where we live we can see the naval dockyard any nuclear blast would go like.
Oh my phone's beeping,
What's that bright flash outside........"
I can see it.
"My phone's beeping.
I WILL NOT COMPLY!
Oh sh..." |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I can't be arsed to panic, it seems unnecessary.
But spasiba for the advice
I played the long game and did Russian at school. If you want to know my name or directions to the metro, I'm sorted.
Winning!
Kak vas zovut?
(Cyrillic no worky )
Menya zovut YOLO!
Da? Spasiba, rad vstreche
See, OP. We're good. We can communicate with our new overlords
If I give you my last rolo would you tell them I'm really tired and could they keep the noise down please? Please?
Da "
Fanks  |
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By *ryan... OP Man
over a year ago
1950's Original |
"If you look at the notification you YES YOU are automatically enlisted in the army. FACT
And you know this how?
 "
A friend of a friend,mentioning no names... Douglas... told me..
and he heard it in the Pig and whistle and Fox and hounds and hares pub |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you look at the notification you YES YOU are automatically enlisted in the army. FACT
Can I be a canon? "
I'd gladly put my balls in you.... Wait what... That sounded better in my head |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you look at the notification you YES YOU are automatically enlisted in the army. FACT
Can I be a canon?
Are you ordained?"
Sure, I’ll do a quick online thingy  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you look at the notification you YES YOU are automatically enlisted in the army. FACT
Can I be a canon?
I'd gladly put my balls in you.... Wait what... That sounded better in my head"
I can imagine it did  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"People people, really??
It's an alarm to warn of impending doom is all.
Chill out.
Definitely chill tomorrow - it's just the test. Next time: panic."
Meh, no point in panicking about the things you have no control over. |
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"People people, really??
It's an alarm to warn of impending doom is all.
Chill out.
Definitely chill tomorrow - it's just the test. Next time: panic.
Meh, no point in panicking about the things you have no control over. "
It's most likely to be used for flooding - I'd be at panic stations to make sure the crisps were on the 1st floor. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you look at the notification you YES YOU are automatically enlisted in the army. FACT
Can I be a canon?
I'd gladly put my balls in you.... Wait what... That sounded better in my head
I can imagine it did "
If it made you laugh, mission accomplished |
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"If you look at the notification you YES YOU are automatically enlisted in the army. FACT
And you know this how?
A friend of a friend,mentioning no names... Douglas... told me..
and he heard it in the Pig and whistle and Fox and hounds and hares pub "
Well in that case,you should have said that from the start.
Sounds legit,it checks out, must be true |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Does the supermarket have enough tin foil for tomorrow?
I bought it all.
I'm gonna make a mint selling it on here. "
lol we had the national alert for over 10 years with state and local alerts for mobile. No tin foil . I can't wait to laugh tomorrow about the forum complaints. It's going to be a good time. |
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By *opinovMan
over a year ago
Point Nemo, Cumbria |
"Turn the notifications off it’s a Trojan horse "
What, a Trojan horse from the people who brought you track and trace?.. ha ha, yeah riiijghht... that's going to be super dooooper deadly isn't it! |
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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago
Newry Down |
Since the defeat of the Third Reich by the Allies and the advent of the Cold War, a conflict between the two major power blocs in Europe has been simply inevitable; they detest each other and each wants to defeat and subjugate the other's territories.
The use of tactical nukes by Putin is, in my opinion an inevitability when he is pushed into a corner.
The public alarm call is a way of preparing us all psychologically for that day! It has been coming for nearly eighty years.
Putin is a product of a vicious callous system that stretches right back to the Tsars, such as Ivan the Terrible.
Joe Stalin was a paranoid psychopath who killed tens of millions with the USSR. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I find it funny. Here in the states it is used on state and national levels. Tornado severe weather warnings. Amber alerts which warns of a child abduction in my area ect..No one lost their minds or got trojan horses. It's ridiculously funny. |
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"Since the defeat of the Third Reich by the Allies and the advent of the Cold War, a conflict between the two major power blocs in Europe has been simply inevitable; they detest each other and each wants to defeat and subjugate the other's territories.
The use of tactical nukes by Putin is, in my opinion an inevitability when he is pushed into a corner.
The public alarm call is a way of preparing us all psychologically for that day! It has been coming for nearly eighty years.
Putin is a product of a vicious callous system that stretches right back to the Tsars, such as Ivan the Terrible.
Joe Stalin was a paranoid psychopath who killed tens of millions with the USSR. "
Yes. Only a UK Govt system would take 80yrs to get from concept to implementation, eh? |
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"Turn the notifications off it’s a Trojan horse "
If it was a "trajan horse" the damage would have been done when it was installed, it wouldn't need to receive a signal to be activated.
Realistically, if people are genuinely worried about being tracked then you get rid of your phone completely, and everything else that connects to the Internet.
|
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"Turn the notifications off it’s a Trojan horse
If it was a "trajan horse" the damage would have been done when it was installed, it wouldn't need to receive a signal to be activated.
Realistically, if people are genuinely worried about being tracked then you get rid of your phone completely, and everything else that connects to the Internet.
"
*Trojan not Trajan |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Turn the notifications off it’s a Trojan horse
If it was a "trajan horse" the damage would have been done when it was installed, it wouldn't need to receive a signal to be activated.
Realistically, if people are genuinely worried about being tracked then you get rid of your phone completely, and everything else that connects to the Internet.
"
I've heard if you shove your phone up your arse the alert won't reach it and the 5G signal won't activate the nanobots that you had pumped into you when you had your covid vaccine won't be able to make you vote Tory at the next election.
I'm lubing up first thing tomorrow in preparation........
A |
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"Turn the notifications off it’s a Trojan horse
If it was a "trajan horse" the damage would have been done when it was installed, it wouldn't need to receive a signal to be activated.
Realistically, if people are genuinely worried about being tracked then you get rid of your phone completely, and everything else that connects to the Internet.
I've heard if you shove your phone up your arse the alert won't reach it and the 5G signal won't activate the nanobots that you had pumped into you when you had your covid vaccine won't be able to make you vote Tory at the next election.
I'm lubing up first thing tomorrow in preparation........
A"
. Don’t. People will actually do it! |
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"Turn the notifications off it’s a Trojan horse
If it was a "trajan horse" the damage would have been done when it was installed, it wouldn't need to receive a signal to be activated.
Realistically, if people are genuinely worried about being tracked then you get rid of your phone completely, and everything else that connects to the Internet.
I've heard if you shove your phone up your arse the alert won't reach it and the 5G signal won't activate the nanobots that you had pumped into you when you had your covid vaccine won't be able to make you vote Tory at the next election.
I'm lubing up first thing tomorrow in preparation........
A"
OMFG |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"Turn the notifications off it’s a Trojan horse
If it was a "trajan horse" the damage would have been done when it was installed, it wouldn't need to receive a signal to be activated.
Realistically, if people are genuinely worried about being tracked then you get rid of your phone completely, and everything else that connects to the Internet.
I've heard if you shove your phone up your arse the alert won't reach it and the 5G signal won't activate the nanobots that you had pumped into you when you had your covid vaccine won't be able to make you vote Tory at the next election.
I'm lubing up first thing tomorrow in preparation........
A"
Video or it didn't happen |
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"Turn the notifications off it’s a Trojan horse
If it was a "trajan horse" the damage would have been done when it was installed, it wouldn't need to receive a signal to be activated.
Realistically, if people are genuinely worried about being tracked then you get rid of your phone completely, and everything else that connects to the Internet.
I've heard if you shove your phone up your arse the alert won't reach it and the 5G signal won't activate the nanobots that you had pumped into you when you had your covid vaccine won't be able to make you vote Tory at the next election.
I'm lubing up first thing tomorrow in preparation........
A"
Don't fall for it, A. My ex-wife's 2nd cousin-by-marriage is a nurse, and she heard that this is a double bluff, with the government using misinformation through the bloody MSM to make people do this and become national alarm carriers... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"These kind of threads piss me laughing. As much as I know the alert is going to go off I will still jump because I've forgotten about it"
I find it to be hilarious |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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2:59pm remove SIM card 3:01 reinsert SIM card or you could just be normal and ignore the phone anyways, it’s Sunday you should be eating your meat about that time (steady on) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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That's so nice of him to warn everyone before hand....
There's not gonna be any nuclear strikes, Putin is a nutcase but not stupid.
If his aim is to make Russia an inhospitable wasteland for the next 10 generations then he will launch. |
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"The bestest time Vladimir Putin to drop the big bomb on the UK is 3pm today..
As everyone will ignore the warning of nuclear.. erm sorry.. flooding alert
 "
To be honest, warnings of incoming nuclear attacks are pointless. There's nowhere for people to go anyway, if it ever happened no amount of warnings would help... unless it's enough time to leave the country.
Cal |
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By *ryan... OP Man
over a year ago
1950's Original |
It seems many got the nuclear alert early at 2:59pm,while many"3"mobile customers didn't get anything...
Reminds me of track and trace...
Or..could it be all 3network customers are Russian spies..you couldn't make it up...or could you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes, coincidence. Not much point spending millions on an alert system warning people of a nuclear holocaust. Not much you can do about it if it happens. Id rather not now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It seems many got the nuclear alert early at 2:59pm,while many"3"mobile customers didn't get anything...
Reminds me of track and trace...
Or..could it be all 3network customers are Russian spies..you couldn't make it up...or could you "
We didn’t get the alert and we are all 3 so we are dead in an emergency lol |
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