FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Can you be friends with the opposite sex?
Can you be friends with the opposite sex?
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Yes but a genuine friendship is quite rare I think.
Heard many guys talk honestly and admit that despite forming a friendship with a woman there's always a wee part of them waiting for the day when an opportunity arises for something more. |
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By *rder66Man
over a year ago
Tatooine |
Yes, I have loads of female friends whom I respect and spend time with without trying or wanting to have sex with them. Some are very attractive as are some of my male friends.
I'm not ruled by my sexual urges.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think men and women can be friends. I'd be lost without having male friends, including on this site. I don't think the fact that many of them have seen my tits diminishes the friendship.  |
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"Yes but a genuine friendship is quite rare I think.
Heard many guys talk honestly and admit that despite forming a friendship with a woman there's always a wee part of them waiting for the day when an opportunity arises for something more. "
So my male friend was saying pretty much the same thing he can't do it personally cause there's always that urge to do more. Where as for me I have more female friends and it never crossed my mind of doing anything of the sort |
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"I think men and women can be friends. I'd be lost without having male friends, including on this site. I don't think the fact that many of them have seen my tits diminishes the friendship. "
That's good to know lol |
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"I have friends of all sexes.
Some I have sex with, some I used to have sex with, some with that flirty were probably going to fuck vibe, and some that are completely platonic and have always been."
That's cool at least you know where you stand with them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My personal experience has been that straight men cannot be friends with a woman without making a move on her.
I'm certainly not any kind of irresistible femme fatale.
I have men with whom I am "friendly" but would always be conscious of keeping a distance to avoid these situations again. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes, of course.
Also as a bisexual person - does that mean I'm weird if I have any friends?  "
Same.
Although pretty much all of my friends are swingers and I've had sex with most of them  |
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"Yes, of course.
Also as a bisexual person - does that mean I'm weird if I have any friends?
Same.
Although pretty much all of my friends are swingers and I've had sex with most of them "
Not a problem with that at all lol |
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By *elloWoman
over a year ago
alpha centauri |
Absolutely you can, I have a male friend who joined this site, we've seen all each others photos and although I appreciate that he has an amazing body I've never thought about having sex with him, but due to his yummy body I have tried to hook him up with a few of my female friends |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Absolutely you can, I have a male friend who joined this site, we've seen all each others photos and although I appreciate that he has an amazing body I've never thought about having sex with him, but due to his yummy body I have tried to hook him up with a few of my female friends "
Aww that’s cute |
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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago
MADERIA Wherever I lay my hat |
Absolutely. One of my best friends is a guy. We had a slightly awkward blip when attraction was an issue but that passed and we are now just mates that wouldn't touch the other with a barge pole |
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Yes absolutely and I do have female friends. I've had some turn into 'more' and some that never have or will.
Just throw a cat amongst the pigeons, as the bi-sexual aspect has been covered. Being demi-sexual means you can often develop friendships without knowing if sexual attraction will occur later or not.
Happened to me twice with a female friends where we loved each other so much we were both like, why don't we just fuck each other? Once it was amazing and we carried on the other time it ended in hysterics as it was so awkward. |
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I thought so, I've always had more male than female friends, however when I split from my ex it became apparent that they all wanted more than friendship.
That put me off seems they were friends in waiting 
Shame though and a little sad as they we're good friends.
Mrs |
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"I thought so, I've always had more male than female friends, however when I split from my ex it became apparent that they all wanted more than friendship.
That put me off seems they were friends in waiting
Shame though and a little sad as they we're good friends.
Mrs "
Oh. That one always sucks. I remember coming out of a 7 year monogamous relationship and feeling the genuine disappointment when it became apparent that half of the friends I'd made during that time were only friends in waiting. |
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Of course it’s possible to have platonic male/female friendships that will never cross into anything more. We’ve both had friends of the opposite sex for years before and after we got married with no issues. |
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"I thought so, I've always had more male than female friends, however when I split from my ex it became apparent that they all wanted more than friendship.
That put me off seems they were friends in waiting
Shame though and a little sad as they we're good friends.
Mrs
Oh. That one always sucks. I remember coming out of a 7 year monogamous relationship and feeling the genuine disappointment when it became apparent that half of the friends I'd made during that time were only friends in waiting."
It really does I was gutted to be honest, some really close friends too, it's made me very wary of people's intentions now which is such a shame.
Mrs |
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"It really does I was gutted to be honest, some really close friends too, it's made me very wary of people's intentions now which is such a shame.
Mrs "
They weren't all like that, but there were enough that had sneaked through to genuinely sting.
I honestly don't mind if someone's intentions are sexual as well as friendly, I just need people to be honest and upfront about it  |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
Of course you can. In the same way as gay people can be friends with people of the same sex as them, and bisexual people can be friends with people of both sexes (etc).
I've always felt that "men and women can't be friends without sex getting in the way" is a very narrow minded view to hold. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I thought so, I've always had more male than female friends, however when I split from my ex it became apparent that they all wanted more than friendship…."
Fuckin funny that isn’t it. My ex soon had a guy in her bed.
I shook that fuckers hand in the past too, that fuckin slimeball. ‘You asked me to look after her!’
I’ve never wanted to break someone’s jaw so much in my life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes
Have more women friends than men
To be honest one is more than friend I can tell her anything she works at one of the stores she is non judgmental and listens I can say anything
So the answer is yes you can be friends |
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"It really does I was gutted to be honest, some really close friends too, it's made me very wary of people's intentions now which is such a shame.
Mrs
They weren't all like that, but there were enough that had sneaked through to genuinely sting.
I honestly don't mind if someone's intentions are sexual as well as friendly, I just need people to be honest and upfront about it "
How would you react if the honest answer is: I don't know, sexual attraction comes for me after there's a connection? |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
Oh how things have changed.
For the better!
The last time the exact same question was asked some of the responses said men can't be friends with women they find attractive because it would be unfair on the guy and the woman would use knowledge of that attraction to abuse the friendship. Along with remarks of not allowing women they were in a relationship with to have purely platonic male friends.
I've just read the whole thread and there's not one display of such attitudes and so far at least, nobody going down that avenue.
Maybe things aren't as bad as they seemed last time after all......  
A |
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"It really does I was gutted to be honest, some really close friends too, it's made me very wary of people's intentions now which is such a shame.
Mrs
They weren't all like that, but there were enough that had sneaked through to genuinely sting.
I honestly don't mind if someone's intentions are sexual as well as friendly, I just need people to be honest and upfront about it
How would you react if the honest answer is: I don't know, sexual attraction comes for me after there's a connection?"
I can be sexually attracted to my friends. I just don't act on it when I value my friendship over the possibility of sex. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have female friends that rip me to pieces like my male friends do, female friends that love all the things I love, female friends that hug me tight on a night out because they value me as a person and at no point do I think I need to kiss them like I mean it, people need friends, some will see right into your soul, keep these people close no matter what sex they are |
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I know plenty of women that I’m friends with especially when I was married. Those same women helped me through my divorce and not once did I think of them as anything other than friends. There’s a few women on this site I am friends with and I value that friendship. |
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"It really does I was gutted to be honest, some really close friends too, it's made me very wary of people's intentions now which is such a shame.
Mrs
They weren't all like that, but there were enough that had sneaked through to genuinely sting.
I honestly don't mind if someone's intentions are sexual as well as friendly, I just need people to be honest and upfront about it
How would you react if the honest answer is: I don't know, sexual attraction comes for me after there's a connection?
I can be sexually attracted to my friends. I just don't act on it when I value my friendship over the possibility of sex."
I've had that response, it made me smile tbh we are still friends to this day, 10 years on. Thanks for that, nice start to the day! |
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"It really does I was gutted to be honest, some really close friends too, it's made me very wary of people's intentions now which is such a shame.
Mrs
They weren't all like that, but there were enough that had sneaked through to genuinely sting.
I honestly don't mind if someone's intentions are sexual as well as friendly, I just need people to be honest and upfront about it
How would you react if the honest answer is: I don't know, sexual attraction comes for me after there's a connection?
I can be sexually attracted to my friends. I just don't act on it when I value my friendship over the possibility of sex.
I've had that response, it made me smile tbh we are still friends to this day, 10 years on. Thanks for that, nice start to the day!"
Absolutely! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hubby and I were ‘just friends’ for a year before my uni relationship came to an end x we were engaged within 12 weeks and are very happy together 23 years on x I think friendship is an excellent base to a relationship x whether you achieve a completely platonic or not relationship you’re letting someone in and that provides the opportunity for a deep connection |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Absolutely. One of my best friends is a guy. We had a slightly awkward blip when attraction was an issue but that passed and we are now just mates that wouldn't touch the other with a barge pole"
Sorry to be ‘that guy’ but my gut tells me he’d still do something  |
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"Absolutely. One of my best friends is a guy. We had a slightly awkward blip when attraction was an issue but that passed and we are now just mates that wouldn't touch the other with a barge pole
Sorry to be ‘that guy’ but my gut tells me he’d still do something "
That probably says more about you than him. |
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It depends on the person. Some people simply can't be friends with the opposite sex because they only see them in sexual terms, they don't want to be friends with them if they can't or don't want to have sex with them. |
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"It really does I was gutted to be honest, some really close friends too, it's made me very wary of people's intentions now which is such a shame.
Mrs
They weren't all like that, but there were enough that had sneaked through to genuinely sting.
I honestly don't mind if someone's intentions are sexual as well as friendly, I just need people to be honest and upfront about it
How would you react if the honest answer is: I don't know, sexual attraction comes for me after there's a connection?"
Then that's honest enough for me to proceed. If it gets to a point where it's more about wanting sex than friendship from me, I hope you'd either admit that so we can talk about it properly or withdraw. |
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I suspect it will vary massively from person to person and situation to situation.
Some people will always have an ulterior motive, others neverand most of us will fit somewhere in between.
There will be those that like and respect their friend enough to never make a move but who secretly wish they could, there will be those who have never considered the relationship anything more than just friendship but on a certain day, in certain circumstances that suddenly changed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My go to answer is always No. If you arent the friend that secretly wants to fuck the other, then it is probably them that secretly wants to do you.
I dont really have friends though and that is probably why |
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"This is something some of my close male friend have a problem with but we always have this conversation on whether you can be friends with the opposite sex. For example one of my closet friends is a female and not once has the thought of getting in a relationship or sex crossed my mind however some people find this bizarre which to me it isn't? Happy weekend "
I totally agree, I have many female friends... some very close ones. At no point has there been any thoughts of anything different. I don't understand why people think that we want to have sex with the entirety of the female population.
Cal |
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
"If it's possible why do so many men use the phrase 'friend zone ' as a negative?"
Maybe they don't value the friend zone as much and given half a chance would step over the line and twist things but we're friends so it's ok like everyone does this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Of course you can - for some people sexual desire will never be part of their mindset, for others where it creeps in, you need to have self control or risk burning the friendship |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Like on hear can have friends on hear that never is going to turn in to anything but friendship guys as well as women
Same at work tend to stear clear of tosspots I work with
But have lot women friends in the stores |
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"This is something some of my close male friend have a problem with but we always have this conversation on whether you can be friends with the opposite sex. For example one of my closet friends is a female and not once has the thought of getting in a relationship or sex crossed my mind however some people find this bizarre which to me it isn't? Happy weekend "
Yes, but I always end up fucking them lol |
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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
"Yes absolutely and I do have female friends. I've had some turn into 'more' and some that never have or will.
Just throw a cat amongst the pigeons, as the bi-sexual aspect has been covered. Being demi-sexual means you can often develop friendships without knowing if sexual attraction will occur later or not.
Happened to me twice with a female friends where we loved each other so much we were both like, why don't we just fuck each other? Once it was amazing and we carried on the other time it ended in hysterics as it was so awkward."
This! I'm certainly somewhere on the demisexual end of things...
My boyfriend was once of my closet friends for 20+ years before we got together, apparently he'd always thought I was attractive but never even thought of anything more.
We got closer and closer over COVID and on a d*unken night out it ended up being sexual. For us it was a natural evolution of the feelings we already had for each other.
But yeah, being pan throws that 'cant have make friends' out of the window (and that's before I bring up the fact I'm non binary) |
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Yes, absolutely. One of my closest friend ends is female and considerably younger than me. When we works together though most people thought there must have been more to it. How wrong they were.
XX |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you both make your intentions clear at the start of the friendship then yes I can be friends with the opposite sex. Problems arise when you’re in the “friend zone” |
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